The Sopranos s06e14 Episode Script
Stage 5
( Buzzing ) Frankie, where are you? Welcome to the chop shop, cugine.
You can't kill me twice, sally boy.
I'M already fucking dead, remember? I'M the boss, michael.
What you had belongs to me.
Even the girl I loved? What's mine is mine.
What's yours is mine.
( Grunts ) Well This is mine too, sally.
Now you can have it.
- Vaffancul'.
- ( screams ) Fuck ben kingsley.
Danny bawildtook him to fucking acting school.
Very well directed, morgan.
I Think there's potentially more money in this than in the porn we've done.
So what do we think? We need the extra scene or not? I Like it the way it is.
I Don't know, rissy, these audiences today love blood.
I Tend to agree with carlo.
I'M thinking one more sexy kill.
When michael follows centrella to the strip club, What if he chops up one of the women? Carmine: who as fate would have it, Was at one time sally boy's mistress.
Two extra shoot days, at a minimum.
- Kid, if it buys us a bullshit theatrical release-- - ( cell phone buzzing ) I'M gonna have to get more money from tony.
I Want this fucking thing out there.
Yeah, t, what's up? You talked to the guy with the air mattresses? I'M in editing.
We just saw the cut of "cleaver.
" - And? - Awesome as is.
The lawyer called, though.
We might have to change the title.
The eldridge cleaver estate, ey wtht an injunction.
Listen, if you wan see some of it, we're finishing the adr after lunch.
- What's that again? - Sound dubbing.
Just call this dispatcher.
It's a holiday weekend.
Thousands of people will be out at the beach.
I'M on it.
- He coming down? - Please.
He don't give two shits abt production.
It's a little boring, I gotta say.
I Mean, that was surising to me.
Mr.
Sacrimoni, how are you today? Isn't that for you to tell me? I Wish I had better news.
Bad on the latest pictures, The cancer has continued to metastasize from the lungs.
We now show masses in the mediastinal lymph nodes, Both kidneys and the brain.
The headaches.
So the Lobectomy, radiation, The goddamn chemo, What was all that? ( Coughs ) for kicks? Those were our options at the time.
And now what are r options? Limited to the extent that I wouldn't recommend any.
At this point, we're looking at stage four small cell carcinoma of the lungs.
- And there's no stage five.
- That's correct.
How long? Difficult to say.
- I Have seen miracles over the years.
- Forget the miracles.
Three months.
Give or take.
Thank you for your candor.
We have a plane back to ringspeld.
How you doing, john? It's funny-- ironic-- whichever.
I Got here.
I Quit smoking after 38 years, Exercised, ate right.
And for what? Even still, It was the right move.
( Man on television speaks indistinctly ) ( Men shouting ) Oh, there she is, my girl.
How are you, sweetie? - Hey, dad.
- Hi.
What did rosen say? - How's the hotel? You all settled in? - It's fine.
- How are you, angel? You look beautiful.
- I'M good.
- Allegra: eric sends his love.
- that's nice.
John, what about rosen? I Don't know.
I I Don't know, sweetie.
- I'M very very sick.
- Oh my god.
( Crying ) All right, don't cry.
Don't cry.
You don't have to make it any harder than it is, all right? No physical contact, please.
- I Love you, john.
- I Love you, too.
- Daddy.
- I Know.
I Know.
Ladies, no contact.
All right.
You come back, you see me again tomorrow.
We have more time, huh? Could I bum one of those? It's casual, though, right? It's your cousin's movie premiere.
We should dress accordingly.
It's what they call a cast-and-crew screening.
It's in the city, tony, With an after-party at some rooftop bar In the meat-packing district.
That place is very chic now.
Meat packers? I'M a happily married man.
Meadow: I'm telling you it's not dress up.
Carmela: speaking of dress up, christopher told me Kelli is having her wedding dress made into an outfit - For the baby to be christened in.
- Oh, sweet.
( Burps ) You all right? Are you taking a date to the screening? If I can meet a normal guy, maybe.
I Heard that What, finn wasn't normal? I Don't intend to discuss finn.
What about that guy in your mcat review? Please, he's completely fixated his o-chem final.
He wants to be a doctor.
Tell him it's educational.
There's body parts all over this movie.
Hey, screw the movie.
I Just wanna hang with celebs.
Why, you think you're gonna get to sleep with paris hilton? What? No.
Stop fidgeting and eat your noodles.
- I Don't want them.
- Where are you going? The bathroom.
Jesus.
- Meow.
- You two have a fight? I Don't know.
Keep an eye on his temp, and we'll finish out the week on the ceftin.
You rest now.
I'll see you in the morning.
- He should be on heparin.
- Excuse me.
Listen to him.
Check his abg.
I'M gonna have to ask you again to not interfere, warren.
I'M gonna change your sheets.
So what are you, the world's smartest orderly? These days I am.
practicing oncologist, Specializing in cancers of the liver.
Roll to your right, please.
Let me spare us the awkwardness.
I Killed my wife.
Not that it's any justification, I Had reason to suspect She was cheating on me with her chiropractor.
- Jesus.
- Granted, I was abusing cocaine at the time, And alcohol.
But I came home one y,da Shot her four times-- twice in the head.
I Killed her aunt, too.
I Didn't know she was there.
Roll over, please.
And the mailman.
At that point I had to fully commit.
Why are you here exactly? I'Ve been accused of being part Of a certain italian-american subculture.
( Laughs ) hey, I know who you are.
I Meant, what's wrong with you? Oh.
- Lungs.
- I'Ve been wanting to meet you, actually.
I Saw you on bill curtis.
- Warren feldman.
- John sacrimoni.
Good to know you.
- I Take it you done chemo, huh? - Twice.
Mind if I take a look at your chart? What about gunga din? Gupte? Fuck him.
Oh, you're seeing rosen.
They let me fly to cleveland, my expense.
- You know him? - I Saw him speak once At an asco conference in georgia.
- Good man.
- But Actually, very few people know this, But he really can't walk on water.
What was his prognosis? Three months.
- With the treatment yove had? - What do you mean? You got a window of one to three years.
What about the metastases? Two rounds of paraplatin, Docetaxel and platinol Concurrent with radiation? Come on, any cancer inside you has slowed to a crawl.
Why is he so fucking negative? We tell the patient three months.
He lives a year.
Who looks like a hero? I'Ll see you around, john.
You take it easy.
Hang in there.
Fuck me.
Tony, morning.
You got a sec? As I told you, my partner and I a With the joint terror task force now.
You're around port newark often enough.
We're concerned about what might come through there from the middle east.
Yeah, and Let's talk terror funding.
Most of it comes about through illegal enterprise.
Our pitch is this, and it's the same we gave christopher moltisanti-- E he never mentioned it: If you or any of your people ever heard of anything going down, Middle easterners, pakistanis, You'd be helping us a lot if you let us know.
I Think there's a word for that.
Your daughter takes pre-med classes in new york.
She use the tunnels? Just something to keep in mind.
That's the last time I'm going down for the paper.
You tell that fucking polack to get here earlier And bring up the paper with her Or she can go clean somebody else's fucking toilets.
What happened? It's too dangerous.
Has been for years.
May I have your attentionpl, se? Welcome to the premiere of "cleaver," The story of a young man who goes to pieces Then manages to find himselagf n.
( Scattered laughter ) In all seriousness, however, I'D like to say a few words.
Much like a child, a film has many parents, That is to say many individuals Who act like parents, Or that by aversion, The film is their baby.
I, As an executive producer, Am one of those individuals.
Two more examples are here with me tonight.
Ladies and gentlemen, my co-e.
p.
Christopher moltisanti And our director morgan yam.
Yeah, hey! I Know you're all psyched to see the movie, So I'm not gonna give a big speech here.
I Just wanna give a shout out To the man who without him This whole thing would be impossible.
Where is he? Thony soprano, everybody.
- Man: hey! - man #2: all right, ton'! Christopher: once he came on board, the whole thing fell together.
And all the other investors, too.
Plus my wife kelli and our new baby.
I Love you guys.
Okay, then.
Cell phones off And hope you li the movie.
( Eerie music playing ) You don't know what? He's a fucking rat! - But we can't really prove it.
- You're gonna argue with me? Frankie: no, it's just, I mean, he's practically like your own son.
I'M sorry, sally.
I Think we oughta give him a pass.
I Didn't ask you what you fucking think.
Motherfucking son of a - That's you.
- No.
- It is.
- You find where this pezzonovante is And you bring him to the butcher shop.
They're gonna find pieces of this kid all over fucking canarsie.
( Cell phonegs ) - Yeah.
- I'M sure he's fine, sweetie.
- You gotta relax.
- But for mithe wedding's to not havein two days.
Who, the guatemalan? Paulie: what time is he gonna be there? I Hate to say this, but the truth is he ain't gonood eh for you.
I Mean, he's a good kid.
What you need is a man.
Paulie: tell him to put it in thenk tru Woman: shh! You know how long I've been waiting to do that? ( Dominique moaning ) Dad, that was neat at the end, the creepy figurine and the crucifix.
I'M glad you caught that, alexandra.
Very observant.
The sacred and the propane.
There's a ton of people wearing t-shirts here.
I Told you.
Is it so horrible you look nice? I'M starving.
I Need to eat something already.
I Asked if you wanted popcorn.
- You want me to make you a plate? - Yeah.
- What? - What? I'Ll give you what.
Come here.
The fucking boss down in the cellar, White bathrobe-- where'd you get that? I Don't know.
Artistic choice.
Seriously though, I'm very proud.
Whatever else happens, you made a movie,christopher.
Nobody could take that away.
A hundred years from now, we're de and gone, People will be watching this fucking thing.
You know how much imperia vodka I scored just From this party alone? I Had a couple of cases put down in your car, too.
Look at this-- the family of early man.
Great, thank you.
Carmine: hey, danny, come here.
Take a picture with us.
Phil leotardo.
Larry and I hung out at the set.
I Don't know if you know this, But the actors, they don't make up what they say.
- It's true.
Even de niro, the girl told me.
- The script girl.
- Lorenzo barese.
- Hey, how you doing, my friend? You getting enough to eat? Bryan rawley, u.
s.
Marshal's service.
Terms of your bail confine you to yr oume, sir.
- Say hello to danny? - Yeah.
- Larry's wife: larry! - call the fucking lawyer! - Larry! - rawley: excuse us, excuse us.
- Excuse us, excuse us.
- Leave him alone, you bastard! Jesus christ.
There's danny's manager.
I Better go talk to him.
There he is.
So how was florida? Hot and sticky, like my balls.
I Okspto ginny.
She's a wreck.
John's in the cancer ward.
She's down the road in some fucking motel.
Poor prick.
Prison's not bad enough, fucking lung cancer to boot.
Tell me about it-- quintuple bypass, Then the infection, Seven months of physical thery.
I'M just now starting to get back to myself again.
Sausage, cioppino, anything spicy Put me back in the emergency room, I'm not careful.
( Sighs ) All in all, we're lucky fucks.
I Tell myself that every day.
So now you're back.
How about you straighten that family out? Not for me, anthony.
Obviously, healthwise, being a boss is a young man's game.
Between the joint fitters and the carpenters, Those envelopes are light er 10% each week.
I Feel it, too.
Well, word on the street is gerry's the favorite to take over.
He's my protege.
I Don't stand in his way.
There's a ringing endorsement.
- Hey, tony.
- Doc, doc.
- You know danny, huh? - How you doing, mr.
Soprano? Doc: got a ticket on the jersey turnpike.
Broken windshield wiper.
I Said he should talk to you.
- I'Ll take care of it.
- That's not necessary.
- Let's take a picture here.
- All right, chill out, doc.
Man: if you're phil leotardo you cannot be happy With the state of affairs, despite appearances.
We're joined now via satellite from bainbridge island, washington, By jerry's fellow mob expert manny safier, The author of the new book "the wise guide to wiseguys.
" Manny, welcome to the program.
How goes the book tour? Thank you, geraldo.
Excellent.
- Jerry, how are you? - Manny.
So we're discussing the apparent mob power vacuum here in new york city.
Are you shocked that there's still no successor to john sacrimoni? Not really.
I Mean, the last 10, That's been a dysfunctional family.
And as jerry said earlier, there are several viable candidates.
Well, viable, I don't know.
You had phil leotardo as the logical successor.
You also have gerardo "gerry" torciano, Also faustino "doc" santoro, who I believe is the frontrunner.
I'M surprised you haven't mentioned carmine lupertazzi, jr.
I Was about to, manny, before you interrued.
Manny: in fact, if you take a look at my book in chapter 14 This santoro thing, I called it a year ago.
Hey.
Thank you for coming, anthony.
I Know it's a long trip.
What, and miss a chance to see missouri? So how's jenny today? She went with allegra to buy some stuff for the kitchenette.
Oh, good, clear her mind.
Reason I asked you here today, She's a bright kid, your sister.
But nebusi My life insurance, I Want to put her on a monthly stipend.
Probably a good idea.
Not all the doctors agree, But if I do only have a few months, I Wanna take care of all this now.
Wait a second.
Which doctor doesn't agree? Feldman, the g I told you about.
- The fe mwiurderer? - He's still a doctor, anthony.
He was a highly-respected oncologist.
I Know, but, john-- He reviewed my case.
He says I could hang on for years.
You're right.
He still has the knowledge.
I Mean, o.
j.
Is no less of a running back, right? Let me ask you something, anthony: How will I be remembered? A wonderful husband.
A loving father.
On the street, though, I mean.
From what I know, you were well-liked, john.
Respected across the board, despite the allocution even.
God knows, guys have actually named names For a hell of a lot less than what you were looking at.
The only nega-- What? When carmine died and you took over, People felt you changed, Became a little trigger-happy, maybe-- A hothead.
God forbid Any of them would find themselves In that position.
It's a thankless job.
- What are you, hungover? - What? I Had two glasses of wine.
Why are you so pissy? - The portrayal of that guy in the movie.
- What guy? - The boss, tony.
- What about him? It was based on you.
Yeah, I know, you said the yelling.
It wasn't just the yelling.
Imitation's a form of flattery.
- You think that was flattering? - It was okay.
He's a tough prick, that baldwin.
What about the girlfriend? - What girlfriend? - The cleaver guy.
The lead character.
His entire motive for revenge.
I Don't know.
You loste, carm.
Sally boy, the boss, he fucked the guy's fiancee.
The thing with adriana? I Told you it never fucking happened.
Well, apparently, your nephew feels otherwise.
Ro pointed it out to me, but if she saw it, that means other people did.
It's a movie.
It's fictional.
It's a revenge fantasy, tony, Which ends with the boss's head split open by a meat cleaver.
( Dance music playing ) Oh, there he is.
Good time last night? Yeah, it was all right.
How about you? Gab had fucking nightmares.
- Club soda, hon.
- Woman: sure.
So what did you think tof movie? Chrissy's the last person I would have confused with marty, But I gotta say, it wasn't bad.
- Is he around? - Chrissy? Nah.
He don't come around here no more, you know that.
That baldwin was pretty good, huh? He was a mean fuck.
I'Ll give him that.
And that girl that played the fiancee, she was hot, The one he was fucking.
It's weird how it works, the creative process.
I'M watching that movie "edward scissorhands," When boom, all of a sudden, it hits me.
What if instead of a pair of scissors, it's a meat cleaver instead? A couple years later, you got a movie.
Originally, I thought a ball-peen hammer, but a cleaver's tter.
I Tell ya, man, it's like I'm living somebody else's life.
You're just not comfortabl with success yet.
I Know.
It's scary.
Feel the fear and do it anyway.
- Without chemicals, either.
- ( Cups clink ) So kelli, the baby.
Good, fucking great.
She's a doll.
She cries a lot, though.
The baby, not kelli.
I Hope you're taking the time To reflect on all this.
Savor the good stuff.
Yeah-- no, I am.
Ere's my other sober buddy.
- Is that an fbi guy? - Your tax dollars at work.
Does he follow you around all the time? They drop in and out.
It's fun.
Look, seriously, think where you were just three months ago.
You came into that meeting.
yo were so fucked up you could barely talk.
And that woman friend was even worse.
I'Ve been trying to do what you said-- Hold back a little, steer clear of old habits, same people.
Must be hard, though, given your lifestyle.
They already misinterpret, I don't wanna hang around so much.
Fucking paulie especiall Have you explained how hard it is to be around alcohol? - How familiar surroundings set it off? - They don't give a fuck.
"But he's fucking my wif ce,mine.
I Want him dead," Jimmy says.
"He will be," he said, "but not just right now.
He earns too much.
" Eight years later, jimmy gets a call one day.
"Remember that guy who we were talking about Who's fucking your wife? He can go.
" The guy wasn't making him money no more.
And that was carmine lupertazzi.
- Holy fucking shit.
- Yeah.
There you are.
We went-- John, what the hell are you doing? - What? - You're smoking.
- So? - Daddy, you're on oxygen.
Warren, pardon me, I'm sorry.
Just calm down, all right? Calm down? I Don't fucking believe you.
( Sighs ) what do I got to lose, gin? What's the difference? You told me dr.
Feldman doesn't agree with the others.
- Yeah, well.
- Miracles do happen, john.
Not to this family they don't.
It's that kind of attitude that probably brought this on in the first place.
You're gonna start with that again? What about all these six-year-olds with leukemia? What's that from, all their negative thinking? ( Coughing ) All due respect, he's a great guy, doc, But boss material? Important thing's we all work together, Whoever winds up in the driver's seat.
Phil, though, I'll never get it.
The man was my mentor.
It was right there for the taking.
His heart, gerry.
What was he gonna do? That's my point, though, what you just said.
Johnny goes away.
It's phil's turn in the driver's seat, And his heart gives out.
- Right.
- his heart.
I Know, what? It's a metaphor.
He lost his balls is what I'm saying.
Just say it then.
Walt fucking whitman over here.
- Ladies.
- Hey.
- How you doing? - Should we get some more wine? This fucking waiter, on sabbatical? What's the name of that sangiovese we had at quattro gatti? - The night your-- - ( sound drops out ) ( Screaming ) Come on! Let's go.
Yeah, give me five dimes apiece On st.
Louis, Minnesota and baltimore.
I Would have invited you to play, but we already had our fourth.
You're not happy.
Let's order.
- What can I get you? - Seared ahi, mixed greens And an iced tea, please.
Philly cheesesteak.
You know what? Give me an arnold palmer instead of the iced tea.
- Okay.
- I Always enjoy those, - But it never occurs to me to order one.
- Wh the fuc carmine? This family of yours.
Fucking senile doc santoro uses one of my guys as a diversion? Sil could have got hurt.
Doc showed a lack of respect.
This fucking leadership, boy.
Step up, carmine.
Get your hands around this thing.
You know you got the support.
You never thought you'd mutter those words, d you? What do you want me to say? I Hear you, tony, and I'm flattered.
But boss-- I don't think so, Especially now that doc has cemented his position.
Phil was bad enough in the top spot, But him I could have lived with.
Here you go.
There was a time I was obsessed with being in charge.
- You remember? - So do it.
One night around then I had this dream.
It's my pop's 100th birthday, even though he'd been dead for years.
The whole family's there-- grandkids, everybody.
He's wearing one of these gold paper crowns, Like at burger king.
This mellifluous box-- ribbons.
ent, He opens it up then looks at me.
This gaze of absolute disappointment.
There's nothing in the box.
So he hands it back to me.
"Go fill it up," he says.
"Come back when I'm 200.
" So go for it, carmine.
Fulfill that part of yourself.
We have this ritual at my house for years.
Our kids are in boarding school.
Every night I come home from work, I strip down, jump naked in the pool.
Nicole brings me a scotch and water.
We sit, relax a littletalk.
I Go up to bed, the air conditioning.
She brings me a light dinner on a tray.
One night during all that fighting with john, I Come home, I'm exhausted.
So tired, so tense, I skip the pool.
I Go right upstairs, flop on the bed.
Nicole comes up with a drink.
She says, "darling, I Think it's time you took a rest.
" I Say, "I'm gonna.
We're gonna take a vacation.
" She says, "that's not what I meant.
I Don't wanna be the wealthiest widow on long island.
I Want you to quit now.
" I'M not ashamed to say that she made me cry.
That wonderful loving woman.
That dream with my father, the empty box-- It wasn't about being boss.
It was about being happy.
Warren, hi.
Hi, hon.
How's he doing? Listen, I've been meaning to talk to you about the smoking.
John shared with me how upset you were.
Psychologically, when a person's told they're dying, It's the ultimate loss of control.
To hear him wheeze like that I Know.
It doesn't make any sense.
I Do know he's a leader.
I Suspect his smoking on some level Is an attempt to die as he lived-- In total control.
Years ago, I asked him to stop for me and the kids.
I Lost 27 lbs.
He couldn't quit smoking? I Gotta go.
Goodbye, caitlin.
I'Ll see you soon, muffin.
Oh my god.
I Love these little hands.
Thanks so much for watching her.
You'd think we're planning a coronation instead of ais chrning.
- We all set? - You know what? I'D better pee.
Goody, I get to keep holding you.
So how you doi ng?tony said you got an offer on the house you built.
Two, aually, yes.
Ivana trump.
I Gotta be honest.
I Am very disappointed at what you did.
- What are you talking about? - Your movie.
The boss sleeping with the other guy's fiancee? - At? - Please, like that wasn't based on tony and ade.
What? No.
Carmela, I didn't even write it.
Story by christopher moltisanti.
Isn't that what it said up there on the screen? Yeah, but that's just for the writers guild health insurance.
- Oh, really? - Come on, you can't be serious.
She's an oriental, for christ sake.
Have you heard from ade lately? No, why would I hear from her? Would it be so surprising? She left me for some other guy.
Is it any wonder? Her poor mother is so upset, she's practically delusional.
She's convinced herself that ade is dead.
Her mother's an alky.
You know that.
Regardless, christopher.
You're my cousin, and I love you, carmela, But I don't like what you're inferring here, Either with the movie or how I treated adriana.
Kelli comes out, tell her I went to smoke.
There's my pal.
How you doing? "Billy bathgate.
" they had it in the library.
I Thought of you.
I Don't know if you heard, but gerry torciano, He was hit last week in brooklyn.
- Who? - Gerry torciano.
It was all over the news.
They whacked him in some restaurant.
Did you know him? Yeah.
I Don't kn.
Good guy.
It's hard to breat.
he I'Ll talk to gupte, See if I can get him to up the beclovent.
I'M dying, aren't I? It's not good.
I Won't lie to you.
The aggressiveness surprises me.
I Gotta concur with rosen.
I Appreciate everything you've done, warren.
- ( Doorbell ringing ) - ( knocking on door ) - Who is it? - Christopher: you don't answer your phone? I Shut the ringer.
It's the middle of the night.
Woman: honey, what's wrong? Nothing, sweetie, it's fine.
Go back to sleep.
It ain't fine.
We got a problem.
That whole sequence with sally boy banging the fiancee, You gotta tell tony that was your idea.
It wasn't my idea.
What, are you fucking stupid he probably thinks I put it in there to embarrass him.
- Why did you put it in there? - It was an idea.
I Don't know.
O knows where they fucking come from? Isaac newton invented gravity 'cause some asshole hit him with an apple.
It's bad enough that I don't get credit for my own ideas.
Now I'm supposed to take responsibility for some shit that's gonna get me in tuble? Fuck that, man.
Humanitas award.
What's that? Humanitas.
From the paulist brothers, For writing themes of socially redeeming-- Ow! Look out the window.
You see a fucking hollywood sign out there? Maybe you talk to your agent like that, T but ever get fucking snippy on me again.
The fucking scary thing was I didn't know what happened Till afterhe tt was fired.
Fucking weird.
- To, hey.
Gentlemen.
- Hey, how are you? T.
j.
Hooker.
J.
t.
, actually, But I'm looking for chris.
I'M supposed to meet him.
What, here? The thing is he left me a message, But this fucking verizon-- - Mind if I wait? - Yeah, sit down.
- Diet coke,lease.
- Woman: you got it.
So what did you think of "cleaver"? It's good, you know.
Congratulations.
I Hope we're gonna see some money soon.
Yeah.
As a writer, you can never tell, you know? You come up with an idea.
You don't know how the audience is gonna respond.
I Mean, justusecai like somethin Doesn't mean anyone else will.
That's the challenge.
It is challenging sometimes, Inventing characters, how they interact.
The boss sally boy for example, His whole persona-- I Stole that from broderick crawford in "born yesterday.
" What's that? Garson kanin, 1950.
It's terrific.
William holden falls in love with crawford's girlfr,iendplayed by The black girl, the singer.
No, that's billie holiday.
Although judy's character in the movie Is named billie too, so I can see why you're confused.
I'Ve never seen it.
Why would I be confused? Anyway, the sally boy character Is based on crawford-- sort of a big, burly guy.
The love triangle, the cuckolding of michael, sleeping with the fiancee, Very similar to the holden-holliday dynamic.
So the whole thing was your idea.
- What happened to your head? - What?on kanin.
Oh.
Cabinet.
Duh.
If I see chrissy, I'll tell him you were looking for him.
Now listen to me, you two heels.
I Mean business.
I Got too much at stakedown here.
You g that belongs to me.
If you wanna get out of here alive, you better give it back.
Now I'm no blowhard.
Tell him.
He's no blowhard.
He's had people killed before.
- About six years ago, there was this guy-- - shut up! You ain't gonna be telling nobody nothing pretty soon.
This is the image of me he leaves to the world.
I Remember when he was born, I would hold him in my arms.
He was an adorable kid, too.
Big eyes.
You always talk about him More like a son.
In some ways he was, Especiallyfter his dad died.
He was little.
I Used to give him rides.
I'D put him in the basket of the butcher bike, Pedahim around, Back when satriale's made deliveries.
I Reminded him of that recently.
- He didn't remember.
- But you do.
We had fun.
All those memories, and for what? All I am to him is some asshole bully.
You're hurt.
His dad dickie was Like my me to him.
A mentor.
Yeah, but more than that, A friend, A fucking guy you could look up to.
And the hope is that you pass that shit down, The respect and the love.
Aldid for this fucking kid And he fucking hates me so much.
I'M sure on some level he loves you, too.
Yeah? Taket thame.
Judge for yourself.
Last five minutes should answer that question.
I'M not going to do that.
- Not a horror fan? - It's what you think that matters.
I Think he fucking despises m e.
's pretty obvious.
Wants to see me dead.
Without invalidating your feelings, Is it possible that on some level You're reading into all this? I'Ve been coming here for years.
I Know too much about the subconscious now.
Look, sweetie, They're nice and clean like you like them.
Mommy, he can't really hear you.
The right here by the bed.
- Johnny: my - what, baby, your what? Want more morphine, daddy? Mo-- mother.
Grandma? What, daddy? Is he hallucinating? Allegra: I don't know.
he could be.
Sometimes they see people who've passed.
John, look at me, baby.
You want a cigte, baby? John.
You can't do that when you're on my fucking team? Hey, ton', anthony infante to see you Send him in.
There he is.
X-ray specs.
- How's john? - That's why I'm here, tony.
John passed away late this morning.
Oh, fuck, you're kidding me.
I Only wh.
He was a great guy, john.
Sorry for your loss.
Thanks.
Honestly, though, it was for the best.
What y are gonna do? I Beat cancer, but it took him out.
( Quotes rock song ) Huh? John sacrimoni, a buon' anima.
All: a buon' anima.
Phil: we're here to celebrate what would have been my brother's-- Your uncle's-- - Blow it out for him.
- ( Blowing ) ( Cheering ) Right here at th bis, this seat Was uncle billy's favorite place in the whole world.
More than shea stadium? More than shea stadium.
He'd sit with his friends and tell stories about his family, Who he loved more than anything and was so very proud of.
From now on, his ashes will be right here So when his friends come to visit, he can see them.
- Can he see us now? - Patty: yeah.
- Who knows who is leonardo da vinci? - I Do.
- Matty.
- Yeah, he wrote "the da vinci code.
" Another man wrote that, but it's a hideous sacrilegious book.
- Annabella.
- Heas a painter, Of the "mona lisa.
" Very good.
He was not only a painter, he did medical drawings, - And he designed a ta nkfor the army.
- Boy: wow.
Leonardo was a great italian, And that was our name originally, leonardo.
But many years ago, when my grandpa came over from sicily, They changed it at ellis island to leotardo.
What did they do that for? Because they're stupid, that's why, and jealous.
They disrespected a proud italian heritage And named us after a ballet costume.
- Marissa.
- That's for modern.
In ballet, you wear tutus.
It doesn't make a difference.
- That's right, it doesn't.
- Can we havkee caow? How you doing, phil? You okay? Whe fucking kid.
Me, I'm an oanld m I'D like to do it over, boy.
Let me tell you.
I Fucking compromised everything.
Nah, what are you talking about? 20 Years inside, Not a fucking peep.
For what? To protect the likes Of rusty fucking millio, doc santoro? You were a man, phil.
That's saying a lot nowadays.
That cocksucking piece of shit tony soprano's cousin-- I Can't even say his name-- Murdered billie.
And what did I do about it? My weakness.
Sometimes I think it's in my dna.
My family took shit from the medigans The minute we got off the boat.
Come on, what the fuck you talking about? Leotardo.
That's my fucking legacy.
No more, butchie.
No more of this.
( Music playing )
You can't kill me twice, sally boy.
I'M already fucking dead, remember? I'M the boss, michael.
What you had belongs to me.
Even the girl I loved? What's mine is mine.
What's yours is mine.
( Grunts ) Well This is mine too, sally.
Now you can have it.
- Vaffancul'.
- ( screams ) Fuck ben kingsley.
Danny bawildtook him to fucking acting school.
Very well directed, morgan.
I Think there's potentially more money in this than in the porn we've done.
So what do we think? We need the extra scene or not? I Like it the way it is.
I Don't know, rissy, these audiences today love blood.
I Tend to agree with carlo.
I'M thinking one more sexy kill.
When michael follows centrella to the strip club, What if he chops up one of the women? Carmine: who as fate would have it, Was at one time sally boy's mistress.
Two extra shoot days, at a minimum.
- Kid, if it buys us a bullshit theatrical release-- - ( cell phone buzzing ) I'M gonna have to get more money from tony.
I Want this fucking thing out there.
Yeah, t, what's up? You talked to the guy with the air mattresses? I'M in editing.
We just saw the cut of "cleaver.
" - And? - Awesome as is.
The lawyer called, though.
We might have to change the title.
The eldridge cleaver estate, ey wtht an injunction.
Listen, if you wan see some of it, we're finishing the adr after lunch.
- What's that again? - Sound dubbing.
Just call this dispatcher.
It's a holiday weekend.
Thousands of people will be out at the beach.
I'M on it.
- He coming down? - Please.
He don't give two shits abt production.
It's a little boring, I gotta say.
I Mean, that was surising to me.
Mr.
Sacrimoni, how are you today? Isn't that for you to tell me? I Wish I had better news.
Bad on the latest pictures, The cancer has continued to metastasize from the lungs.
We now show masses in the mediastinal lymph nodes, Both kidneys and the brain.
The headaches.
So the Lobectomy, radiation, The goddamn chemo, What was all that? ( Coughs ) for kicks? Those were our options at the time.
And now what are r options? Limited to the extent that I wouldn't recommend any.
At this point, we're looking at stage four small cell carcinoma of the lungs.
- And there's no stage five.
- That's correct.
How long? Difficult to say.
- I Have seen miracles over the years.
- Forget the miracles.
Three months.
Give or take.
Thank you for your candor.
We have a plane back to ringspeld.
How you doing, john? It's funny-- ironic-- whichever.
I Got here.
I Quit smoking after 38 years, Exercised, ate right.
And for what? Even still, It was the right move.
( Man on television speaks indistinctly ) ( Men shouting ) Oh, there she is, my girl.
How are you, sweetie? - Hey, dad.
- Hi.
What did rosen say? - How's the hotel? You all settled in? - It's fine.
- How are you, angel? You look beautiful.
- I'M good.
- Allegra: eric sends his love.
- that's nice.
John, what about rosen? I Don't know.
I I Don't know, sweetie.
- I'M very very sick.
- Oh my god.
( Crying ) All right, don't cry.
Don't cry.
You don't have to make it any harder than it is, all right? No physical contact, please.
- I Love you, john.
- I Love you, too.
- Daddy.
- I Know.
I Know.
Ladies, no contact.
All right.
You come back, you see me again tomorrow.
We have more time, huh? Could I bum one of those? It's casual, though, right? It's your cousin's movie premiere.
We should dress accordingly.
It's what they call a cast-and-crew screening.
It's in the city, tony, With an after-party at some rooftop bar In the meat-packing district.
That place is very chic now.
Meat packers? I'M a happily married man.
Meadow: I'm telling you it's not dress up.
Carmela: speaking of dress up, christopher told me Kelli is having her wedding dress made into an outfit - For the baby to be christened in.
- Oh, sweet.
( Burps ) You all right? Are you taking a date to the screening? If I can meet a normal guy, maybe.
I Heard that What, finn wasn't normal? I Don't intend to discuss finn.
What about that guy in your mcat review? Please, he's completely fixated his o-chem final.
He wants to be a doctor.
Tell him it's educational.
There's body parts all over this movie.
Hey, screw the movie.
I Just wanna hang with celebs.
Why, you think you're gonna get to sleep with paris hilton? What? No.
Stop fidgeting and eat your noodles.
- I Don't want them.
- Where are you going? The bathroom.
Jesus.
- Meow.
- You two have a fight? I Don't know.
Keep an eye on his temp, and we'll finish out the week on the ceftin.
You rest now.
I'll see you in the morning.
- He should be on heparin.
- Excuse me.
Listen to him.
Check his abg.
I'M gonna have to ask you again to not interfere, warren.
I'M gonna change your sheets.
So what are you, the world's smartest orderly? These days I am.
practicing oncologist, Specializing in cancers of the liver.
Roll to your right, please.
Let me spare us the awkwardness.
I Killed my wife.
Not that it's any justification, I Had reason to suspect She was cheating on me with her chiropractor.
- Jesus.
- Granted, I was abusing cocaine at the time, And alcohol.
But I came home one y,da Shot her four times-- twice in the head.
I Killed her aunt, too.
I Didn't know she was there.
Roll over, please.
And the mailman.
At that point I had to fully commit.
Why are you here exactly? I'Ve been accused of being part Of a certain italian-american subculture.
( Laughs ) hey, I know who you are.
I Meant, what's wrong with you? Oh.
- Lungs.
- I'Ve been wanting to meet you, actually.
I Saw you on bill curtis.
- Warren feldman.
- John sacrimoni.
Good to know you.
- I Take it you done chemo, huh? - Twice.
Mind if I take a look at your chart? What about gunga din? Gupte? Fuck him.
Oh, you're seeing rosen.
They let me fly to cleveland, my expense.
- You know him? - I Saw him speak once At an asco conference in georgia.
- Good man.
- But Actually, very few people know this, But he really can't walk on water.
What was his prognosis? Three months.
- With the treatment yove had? - What do you mean? You got a window of one to three years.
What about the metastases? Two rounds of paraplatin, Docetaxel and platinol Concurrent with radiation? Come on, any cancer inside you has slowed to a crawl.
Why is he so fucking negative? We tell the patient three months.
He lives a year.
Who looks like a hero? I'Ll see you around, john.
You take it easy.
Hang in there.
Fuck me.
Tony, morning.
You got a sec? As I told you, my partner and I a With the joint terror task force now.
You're around port newark often enough.
We're concerned about what might come through there from the middle east.
Yeah, and Let's talk terror funding.
Most of it comes about through illegal enterprise.
Our pitch is this, and it's the same we gave christopher moltisanti-- E he never mentioned it: If you or any of your people ever heard of anything going down, Middle easterners, pakistanis, You'd be helping us a lot if you let us know.
I Think there's a word for that.
Your daughter takes pre-med classes in new york.
She use the tunnels? Just something to keep in mind.
That's the last time I'm going down for the paper.
You tell that fucking polack to get here earlier And bring up the paper with her Or she can go clean somebody else's fucking toilets.
What happened? It's too dangerous.
Has been for years.
May I have your attentionpl, se? Welcome to the premiere of "cleaver," The story of a young man who goes to pieces Then manages to find himselagf n.
( Scattered laughter ) In all seriousness, however, I'D like to say a few words.
Much like a child, a film has many parents, That is to say many individuals Who act like parents, Or that by aversion, The film is their baby.
I, As an executive producer, Am one of those individuals.
Two more examples are here with me tonight.
Ladies and gentlemen, my co-e.
p.
Christopher moltisanti And our director morgan yam.
Yeah, hey! I Know you're all psyched to see the movie, So I'm not gonna give a big speech here.
I Just wanna give a shout out To the man who without him This whole thing would be impossible.
Where is he? Thony soprano, everybody.
- Man: hey! - man #2: all right, ton'! Christopher: once he came on board, the whole thing fell together.
And all the other investors, too.
Plus my wife kelli and our new baby.
I Love you guys.
Okay, then.
Cell phones off And hope you li the movie.
( Eerie music playing ) You don't know what? He's a fucking rat! - But we can't really prove it.
- You're gonna argue with me? Frankie: no, it's just, I mean, he's practically like your own son.
I'M sorry, sally.
I Think we oughta give him a pass.
I Didn't ask you what you fucking think.
Motherfucking son of a - That's you.
- No.
- It is.
- You find where this pezzonovante is And you bring him to the butcher shop.
They're gonna find pieces of this kid all over fucking canarsie.
( Cell phonegs ) - Yeah.
- I'M sure he's fine, sweetie.
- You gotta relax.
- But for mithe wedding's to not havein two days.
Who, the guatemalan? Paulie: what time is he gonna be there? I Hate to say this, but the truth is he ain't gonood eh for you.
I Mean, he's a good kid.
What you need is a man.
Paulie: tell him to put it in thenk tru Woman: shh! You know how long I've been waiting to do that? ( Dominique moaning ) Dad, that was neat at the end, the creepy figurine and the crucifix.
I'M glad you caught that, alexandra.
Very observant.
The sacred and the propane.
There's a ton of people wearing t-shirts here.
I Told you.
Is it so horrible you look nice? I'M starving.
I Need to eat something already.
I Asked if you wanted popcorn.
- You want me to make you a plate? - Yeah.
- What? - What? I'Ll give you what.
Come here.
The fucking boss down in the cellar, White bathrobe-- where'd you get that? I Don't know.
Artistic choice.
Seriously though, I'm very proud.
Whatever else happens, you made a movie,christopher.
Nobody could take that away.
A hundred years from now, we're de and gone, People will be watching this fucking thing.
You know how much imperia vodka I scored just From this party alone? I Had a couple of cases put down in your car, too.
Look at this-- the family of early man.
Great, thank you.
Carmine: hey, danny, come here.
Take a picture with us.
Phil leotardo.
Larry and I hung out at the set.
I Don't know if you know this, But the actors, they don't make up what they say.
- It's true.
Even de niro, the girl told me.
- The script girl.
- Lorenzo barese.
- Hey, how you doing, my friend? You getting enough to eat? Bryan rawley, u.
s.
Marshal's service.
Terms of your bail confine you to yr oume, sir.
- Say hello to danny? - Yeah.
- Larry's wife: larry! - call the fucking lawyer! - Larry! - rawley: excuse us, excuse us.
- Excuse us, excuse us.
- Leave him alone, you bastard! Jesus christ.
There's danny's manager.
I Better go talk to him.
There he is.
So how was florida? Hot and sticky, like my balls.
I Okspto ginny.
She's a wreck.
John's in the cancer ward.
She's down the road in some fucking motel.
Poor prick.
Prison's not bad enough, fucking lung cancer to boot.
Tell me about it-- quintuple bypass, Then the infection, Seven months of physical thery.
I'M just now starting to get back to myself again.
Sausage, cioppino, anything spicy Put me back in the emergency room, I'm not careful.
( Sighs ) All in all, we're lucky fucks.
I Tell myself that every day.
So now you're back.
How about you straighten that family out? Not for me, anthony.
Obviously, healthwise, being a boss is a young man's game.
Between the joint fitters and the carpenters, Those envelopes are light er 10% each week.
I Feel it, too.
Well, word on the street is gerry's the favorite to take over.
He's my protege.
I Don't stand in his way.
There's a ringing endorsement.
- Hey, tony.
- Doc, doc.
- You know danny, huh? - How you doing, mr.
Soprano? Doc: got a ticket on the jersey turnpike.
Broken windshield wiper.
I Said he should talk to you.
- I'Ll take care of it.
- That's not necessary.
- Let's take a picture here.
- All right, chill out, doc.
Man: if you're phil leotardo you cannot be happy With the state of affairs, despite appearances.
We're joined now via satellite from bainbridge island, washington, By jerry's fellow mob expert manny safier, The author of the new book "the wise guide to wiseguys.
" Manny, welcome to the program.
How goes the book tour? Thank you, geraldo.
Excellent.
- Jerry, how are you? - Manny.
So we're discussing the apparent mob power vacuum here in new york city.
Are you shocked that there's still no successor to john sacrimoni? Not really.
I Mean, the last 10, That's been a dysfunctional family.
And as jerry said earlier, there are several viable candidates.
Well, viable, I don't know.
You had phil leotardo as the logical successor.
You also have gerardo "gerry" torciano, Also faustino "doc" santoro, who I believe is the frontrunner.
I'M surprised you haven't mentioned carmine lupertazzi, jr.
I Was about to, manny, before you interrued.
Manny: in fact, if you take a look at my book in chapter 14 This santoro thing, I called it a year ago.
Hey.
Thank you for coming, anthony.
I Know it's a long trip.
What, and miss a chance to see missouri? So how's jenny today? She went with allegra to buy some stuff for the kitchenette.
Oh, good, clear her mind.
Reason I asked you here today, She's a bright kid, your sister.
But nebusi My life insurance, I Want to put her on a monthly stipend.
Probably a good idea.
Not all the doctors agree, But if I do only have a few months, I Wanna take care of all this now.
Wait a second.
Which doctor doesn't agree? Feldman, the g I told you about.
- The fe mwiurderer? - He's still a doctor, anthony.
He was a highly-respected oncologist.
I Know, but, john-- He reviewed my case.
He says I could hang on for years.
You're right.
He still has the knowledge.
I Mean, o.
j.
Is no less of a running back, right? Let me ask you something, anthony: How will I be remembered? A wonderful husband.
A loving father.
On the street, though, I mean.
From what I know, you were well-liked, john.
Respected across the board, despite the allocution even.
God knows, guys have actually named names For a hell of a lot less than what you were looking at.
The only nega-- What? When carmine died and you took over, People felt you changed, Became a little trigger-happy, maybe-- A hothead.
God forbid Any of them would find themselves In that position.
It's a thankless job.
- What are you, hungover? - What? I Had two glasses of wine.
Why are you so pissy? - The portrayal of that guy in the movie.
- What guy? - The boss, tony.
- What about him? It was based on you.
Yeah, I know, you said the yelling.
It wasn't just the yelling.
Imitation's a form of flattery.
- You think that was flattering? - It was okay.
He's a tough prick, that baldwin.
What about the girlfriend? - What girlfriend? - The cleaver guy.
The lead character.
His entire motive for revenge.
I Don't know.
You loste, carm.
Sally boy, the boss, he fucked the guy's fiancee.
The thing with adriana? I Told you it never fucking happened.
Well, apparently, your nephew feels otherwise.
Ro pointed it out to me, but if she saw it, that means other people did.
It's a movie.
It's fictional.
It's a revenge fantasy, tony, Which ends with the boss's head split open by a meat cleaver.
( Dance music playing ) Oh, there he is.
Good time last night? Yeah, it was all right.
How about you? Gab had fucking nightmares.
- Club soda, hon.
- Woman: sure.
So what did you think tof movie? Chrissy's the last person I would have confused with marty, But I gotta say, it wasn't bad.
- Is he around? - Chrissy? Nah.
He don't come around here no more, you know that.
That baldwin was pretty good, huh? He was a mean fuck.
I'Ll give him that.
And that girl that played the fiancee, she was hot, The one he was fucking.
It's weird how it works, the creative process.
I'M watching that movie "edward scissorhands," When boom, all of a sudden, it hits me.
What if instead of a pair of scissors, it's a meat cleaver instead? A couple years later, you got a movie.
Originally, I thought a ball-peen hammer, but a cleaver's tter.
I Tell ya, man, it's like I'm living somebody else's life.
You're just not comfortabl with success yet.
I Know.
It's scary.
Feel the fear and do it anyway.
- Without chemicals, either.
- ( Cups clink ) So kelli, the baby.
Good, fucking great.
She's a doll.
She cries a lot, though.
The baby, not kelli.
I Hope you're taking the time To reflect on all this.
Savor the good stuff.
Yeah-- no, I am.
Ere's my other sober buddy.
- Is that an fbi guy? - Your tax dollars at work.
Does he follow you around all the time? They drop in and out.
It's fun.
Look, seriously, think where you were just three months ago.
You came into that meeting.
yo were so fucked up you could barely talk.
And that woman friend was even worse.
I'Ve been trying to do what you said-- Hold back a little, steer clear of old habits, same people.
Must be hard, though, given your lifestyle.
They already misinterpret, I don't wanna hang around so much.
Fucking paulie especiall Have you explained how hard it is to be around alcohol? - How familiar surroundings set it off? - They don't give a fuck.
"But he's fucking my wif ce,mine.
I Want him dead," Jimmy says.
"He will be," he said, "but not just right now.
He earns too much.
" Eight years later, jimmy gets a call one day.
"Remember that guy who we were talking about Who's fucking your wife? He can go.
" The guy wasn't making him money no more.
And that was carmine lupertazzi.
- Holy fucking shit.
- Yeah.
There you are.
We went-- John, what the hell are you doing? - What? - You're smoking.
- So? - Daddy, you're on oxygen.
Warren, pardon me, I'm sorry.
Just calm down, all right? Calm down? I Don't fucking believe you.
( Sighs ) what do I got to lose, gin? What's the difference? You told me dr.
Feldman doesn't agree with the others.
- Yeah, well.
- Miracles do happen, john.
Not to this family they don't.
It's that kind of attitude that probably brought this on in the first place.
You're gonna start with that again? What about all these six-year-olds with leukemia? What's that from, all their negative thinking? ( Coughing ) All due respect, he's a great guy, doc, But boss material? Important thing's we all work together, Whoever winds up in the driver's seat.
Phil, though, I'll never get it.
The man was my mentor.
It was right there for the taking.
His heart, gerry.
What was he gonna do? That's my point, though, what you just said.
Johnny goes away.
It's phil's turn in the driver's seat, And his heart gives out.
- Right.
- his heart.
I Know, what? It's a metaphor.
He lost his balls is what I'm saying.
Just say it then.
Walt fucking whitman over here.
- Ladies.
- Hey.
- How you doing? - Should we get some more wine? This fucking waiter, on sabbatical? What's the name of that sangiovese we had at quattro gatti? - The night your-- - ( sound drops out ) ( Screaming ) Come on! Let's go.
Yeah, give me five dimes apiece On st.
Louis, Minnesota and baltimore.
I Would have invited you to play, but we already had our fourth.
You're not happy.
Let's order.
- What can I get you? - Seared ahi, mixed greens And an iced tea, please.
Philly cheesesteak.
You know what? Give me an arnold palmer instead of the iced tea.
- Okay.
- I Always enjoy those, - But it never occurs to me to order one.
- Wh the fuc carmine? This family of yours.
Fucking senile doc santoro uses one of my guys as a diversion? Sil could have got hurt.
Doc showed a lack of respect.
This fucking leadership, boy.
Step up, carmine.
Get your hands around this thing.
You know you got the support.
You never thought you'd mutter those words, d you? What do you want me to say? I Hear you, tony, and I'm flattered.
But boss-- I don't think so, Especially now that doc has cemented his position.
Phil was bad enough in the top spot, But him I could have lived with.
Here you go.
There was a time I was obsessed with being in charge.
- You remember? - So do it.
One night around then I had this dream.
It's my pop's 100th birthday, even though he'd been dead for years.
The whole family's there-- grandkids, everybody.
He's wearing one of these gold paper crowns, Like at burger king.
This mellifluous box-- ribbons.
ent, He opens it up then looks at me.
This gaze of absolute disappointment.
There's nothing in the box.
So he hands it back to me.
"Go fill it up," he says.
"Come back when I'm 200.
" So go for it, carmine.
Fulfill that part of yourself.
We have this ritual at my house for years.
Our kids are in boarding school.
Every night I come home from work, I strip down, jump naked in the pool.
Nicole brings me a scotch and water.
We sit, relax a littletalk.
I Go up to bed, the air conditioning.
She brings me a light dinner on a tray.
One night during all that fighting with john, I Come home, I'm exhausted.
So tired, so tense, I skip the pool.
I Go right upstairs, flop on the bed.
Nicole comes up with a drink.
She says, "darling, I Think it's time you took a rest.
" I Say, "I'm gonna.
We're gonna take a vacation.
" She says, "that's not what I meant.
I Don't wanna be the wealthiest widow on long island.
I Want you to quit now.
" I'M not ashamed to say that she made me cry.
That wonderful loving woman.
That dream with my father, the empty box-- It wasn't about being boss.
It was about being happy.
Warren, hi.
Hi, hon.
How's he doing? Listen, I've been meaning to talk to you about the smoking.
John shared with me how upset you were.
Psychologically, when a person's told they're dying, It's the ultimate loss of control.
To hear him wheeze like that I Know.
It doesn't make any sense.
I Do know he's a leader.
I Suspect his smoking on some level Is an attempt to die as he lived-- In total control.
Years ago, I asked him to stop for me and the kids.
I Lost 27 lbs.
He couldn't quit smoking? I Gotta go.
Goodbye, caitlin.
I'Ll see you soon, muffin.
Oh my god.
I Love these little hands.
Thanks so much for watching her.
You'd think we're planning a coronation instead of ais chrning.
- We all set? - You know what? I'D better pee.
Goody, I get to keep holding you.
So how you doi ng?tony said you got an offer on the house you built.
Two, aually, yes.
Ivana trump.
I Gotta be honest.
I Am very disappointed at what you did.
- What are you talking about? - Your movie.
The boss sleeping with the other guy's fiancee? - At? - Please, like that wasn't based on tony and ade.
What? No.
Carmela, I didn't even write it.
Story by christopher moltisanti.
Isn't that what it said up there on the screen? Yeah, but that's just for the writers guild health insurance.
- Oh, really? - Come on, you can't be serious.
She's an oriental, for christ sake.
Have you heard from ade lately? No, why would I hear from her? Would it be so surprising? She left me for some other guy.
Is it any wonder? Her poor mother is so upset, she's practically delusional.
She's convinced herself that ade is dead.
Her mother's an alky.
You know that.
Regardless, christopher.
You're my cousin, and I love you, carmela, But I don't like what you're inferring here, Either with the movie or how I treated adriana.
Kelli comes out, tell her I went to smoke.
There's my pal.
How you doing? "Billy bathgate.
" they had it in the library.
I Thought of you.
I Don't know if you heard, but gerry torciano, He was hit last week in brooklyn.
- Who? - Gerry torciano.
It was all over the news.
They whacked him in some restaurant.
Did you know him? Yeah.
I Don't kn.
Good guy.
It's hard to breat.
he I'Ll talk to gupte, See if I can get him to up the beclovent.
I'M dying, aren't I? It's not good.
I Won't lie to you.
The aggressiveness surprises me.
I Gotta concur with rosen.
I Appreciate everything you've done, warren.
- ( Doorbell ringing ) - ( knocking on door ) - Who is it? - Christopher: you don't answer your phone? I Shut the ringer.
It's the middle of the night.
Woman: honey, what's wrong? Nothing, sweetie, it's fine.
Go back to sleep.
It ain't fine.
We got a problem.
That whole sequence with sally boy banging the fiancee, You gotta tell tony that was your idea.
It wasn't my idea.
What, are you fucking stupid he probably thinks I put it in there to embarrass him.
- Why did you put it in there? - It was an idea.
I Don't know.
O knows where they fucking come from? Isaac newton invented gravity 'cause some asshole hit him with an apple.
It's bad enough that I don't get credit for my own ideas.
Now I'm supposed to take responsibility for some shit that's gonna get me in tuble? Fuck that, man.
Humanitas award.
What's that? Humanitas.
From the paulist brothers, For writing themes of socially redeeming-- Ow! Look out the window.
You see a fucking hollywood sign out there? Maybe you talk to your agent like that, T but ever get fucking snippy on me again.
The fucking scary thing was I didn't know what happened Till afterhe tt was fired.
Fucking weird.
- To, hey.
Gentlemen.
- Hey, how are you? T.
j.
Hooker.
J.
t.
, actually, But I'm looking for chris.
I'M supposed to meet him.
What, here? The thing is he left me a message, But this fucking verizon-- - Mind if I wait? - Yeah, sit down.
- Diet coke,lease.
- Woman: you got it.
So what did you think of "cleaver"? It's good, you know.
Congratulations.
I Hope we're gonna see some money soon.
Yeah.
As a writer, you can never tell, you know? You come up with an idea.
You don't know how the audience is gonna respond.
I Mean, justusecai like somethin Doesn't mean anyone else will.
That's the challenge.
It is challenging sometimes, Inventing characters, how they interact.
The boss sally boy for example, His whole persona-- I Stole that from broderick crawford in "born yesterday.
" What's that? Garson kanin, 1950.
It's terrific.
William holden falls in love with crawford's girlfr,iendplayed by The black girl, the singer.
No, that's billie holiday.
Although judy's character in the movie Is named billie too, so I can see why you're confused.
I'Ve never seen it.
Why would I be confused? Anyway, the sally boy character Is based on crawford-- sort of a big, burly guy.
The love triangle, the cuckolding of michael, sleeping with the fiancee, Very similar to the holden-holliday dynamic.
So the whole thing was your idea.
- What happened to your head? - What?on kanin.
Oh.
Cabinet.
Duh.
If I see chrissy, I'll tell him you were looking for him.
Now listen to me, you two heels.
I Mean business.
I Got too much at stakedown here.
You g that belongs to me.
If you wanna get out of here alive, you better give it back.
Now I'm no blowhard.
Tell him.
He's no blowhard.
He's had people killed before.
- About six years ago, there was this guy-- - shut up! You ain't gonna be telling nobody nothing pretty soon.
This is the image of me he leaves to the world.
I Remember when he was born, I would hold him in my arms.
He was an adorable kid, too.
Big eyes.
You always talk about him More like a son.
In some ways he was, Especiallyfter his dad died.
He was little.
I Used to give him rides.
I'D put him in the basket of the butcher bike, Pedahim around, Back when satriale's made deliveries.
I Reminded him of that recently.
- He didn't remember.
- But you do.
We had fun.
All those memories, and for what? All I am to him is some asshole bully.
You're hurt.
His dad dickie was Like my me to him.
A mentor.
Yeah, but more than that, A friend, A fucking guy you could look up to.
And the hope is that you pass that shit down, The respect and the love.
Aldid for this fucking kid And he fucking hates me so much.
I'M sure on some level he loves you, too.
Yeah? Taket thame.
Judge for yourself.
Last five minutes should answer that question.
I'M not going to do that.
- Not a horror fan? - It's what you think that matters.
I Think he fucking despises m e.
's pretty obvious.
Wants to see me dead.
Without invalidating your feelings, Is it possible that on some level You're reading into all this? I'Ve been coming here for years.
I Know too much about the subconscious now.
Look, sweetie, They're nice and clean like you like them.
Mommy, he can't really hear you.
The right here by the bed.
- Johnny: my - what, baby, your what? Want more morphine, daddy? Mo-- mother.
Grandma? What, daddy? Is he hallucinating? Allegra: I don't know.
he could be.
Sometimes they see people who've passed.
John, look at me, baby.
You want a cigte, baby? John.
You can't do that when you're on my fucking team? Hey, ton', anthony infante to see you Send him in.
There he is.
X-ray specs.
- How's john? - That's why I'm here, tony.
John passed away late this morning.
Oh, fuck, you're kidding me.
I Only wh.
He was a great guy, john.
Sorry for your loss.
Thanks.
Honestly, though, it was for the best.
What y are gonna do? I Beat cancer, but it took him out.
( Quotes rock song ) Huh? John sacrimoni, a buon' anima.
All: a buon' anima.
Phil: we're here to celebrate what would have been my brother's-- Your uncle's-- - Blow it out for him.
- ( Blowing ) ( Cheering ) Right here at th bis, this seat Was uncle billy's favorite place in the whole world.
More than shea stadium? More than shea stadium.
He'd sit with his friends and tell stories about his family, Who he loved more than anything and was so very proud of.
From now on, his ashes will be right here So when his friends come to visit, he can see them.
- Can he see us now? - Patty: yeah.
- Who knows who is leonardo da vinci? - I Do.
- Matty.
- Yeah, he wrote "the da vinci code.
" Another man wrote that, but it's a hideous sacrilegious book.
- Annabella.
- Heas a painter, Of the "mona lisa.
" Very good.
He was not only a painter, he did medical drawings, - And he designed a ta nkfor the army.
- Boy: wow.
Leonardo was a great italian, And that was our name originally, leonardo.
But many years ago, when my grandpa came over from sicily, They changed it at ellis island to leotardo.
What did they do that for? Because they're stupid, that's why, and jealous.
They disrespected a proud italian heritage And named us after a ballet costume.
- Marissa.
- That's for modern.
In ballet, you wear tutus.
It doesn't make a difference.
- That's right, it doesn't.
- Can we havkee caow? How you doing, phil? You okay? Whe fucking kid.
Me, I'm an oanld m I'D like to do it over, boy.
Let me tell you.
I Fucking compromised everything.
Nah, what are you talking about? 20 Years inside, Not a fucking peep.
For what? To protect the likes Of rusty fucking millio, doc santoro? You were a man, phil.
That's saying a lot nowadays.
That cocksucking piece of shit tony soprano's cousin-- I Can't even say his name-- Murdered billie.
And what did I do about it? My weakness.
Sometimes I think it's in my dna.
My family took shit from the medigans The minute we got off the boat.
Come on, what the fuck you talking about? Leotardo.
That's my fucking legacy.
No more, butchie.
No more of this.
( Music playing )