Heartbeat (1992) s06e17 Episode Script

1
Heartbeat
Why do you miss when
my baby kisses me?
Heartbeat
Why does a love kiss
stay in my memory?
Piddle dee pat
And sing to me love stories ♪
Which one do you think?
Um, I think I like this one.
This one can be for Jo.
I'll fetch a bucket.
Look, Katie.
It's a Christmas tree.
Look, we're going to decorate it
with all sort of lovely things
and then we're gonna put
a pretty angel on the top.
(WHISTLES)
Jingle Bells
If you were a kid,
would you guess?
What?
That I wasn't real.
Do your walk again.
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
What's this, Ventress?
Some sort of undercover
work, is it?
I'm Father Christmas, sarge.
Oh, Father Christmas.
I'd never have guessed.
It's for Aidensfield
Primary School, sarge.
Why don't you come
along and watch, sarge?
They've got a nativity
play and all sorts.
I mean, Christmas is
a time for children.
Christmas, Bellamy,
is a time for fools.
Now, get this idiotic
fancy dress off, Ventress,
get on with those reports.
Otherwise, I'll have you in
here on Christmas morning.
Turkey or no turkey.
We're not having a
turkey this year, sarge.
Greengrass is supplying
us with a goose.
Greengrass?
Fell off a lorry, did it?
Are there some more in the shed?
No, there's only three.
Well, we still got
orders for seven.
We had seven, but you
gave four to Mr. Scripps.
When were that?
Last night, when you were drunk.
Were you there?
Aye, I was.
What's the point of me making
you my personal assistant
if you don't look after me?
Why didn't you try and stop me?
I did try but you said
you'd have me gelded.
Did I? Sounds like me.
Alright. I'll go and
get another three.
- Four.
- What?
Four.
At least you can count.
Make yourself scarce.
Now then, Miss Weston.
- Claude, what's happened to my goose?
- It's been delivered.
No, it hasn't.
I've just been to have a look.
Well, there couldn't have been
anybody there when he brought it.
Cause I told David
David
oh, he's gone.
I told David, cash on delivery.
Nick's going to be up at the
cottage during the afternoon.
And I'm going to
be there after four.
It had better be there, Claude.
My parents are coming
to dinner tonight.
All right, it will be.
Alright David.
I'll go and sort some more out.
While I'm doing that,
you kill them three and start
to get them ready, alright.
Kill them?
I can't kill them, Mr. Greengrass.
You what?
I only said I'd take them
round for you, not kill them.
I couldn't kill anything, me.
We want to get home
before it's dark.
And you, Mr. Briggs.
Come on, lad.
CHEERING AND LAUGHTER
Mr. Briggs.
What is that bottle, may I ask?
They're like a bunch
of kids, aren't they.
All aboard, Mave.
Has everyone been to the toilet?
ALL: Yes!
Hey, pay attention.
You know what you've got to do.
You pick up four geese and you
bring them straight back here.
Right.
And you don't stop off anywhere
and you don't talk to anybody.
Don't tell anybody what
you're doing, right?
Okay.
Right. Be very careful with
this vehicle. It's very precious.
Let It Snow,
Let It Snow, Let It Snow!
Oh the weather outside is frightful
But the fire is so delightful
And since we've no place to go
Let it snow,
let it snow, let it snow ♪
Man it doesn't show
signs of stopping
And I brought me
some corn for popping
The lights are turned way down low
Oh, heck, look at it!
But you're alright.
There's only a couple
of inches on t'road.
Yes, but is it safe?
Is it safe?
You're in expert hands
with me at the wheel.
Look, Father Christmas,
in the absence of reindeer,
me and the patrol car
are your only option.
You can't let the kiddies down.
You're right.
Come on. Do your belt up.
Ho, ho, ho.
- Get off!
- Bellamy!
Come on, quick.
Come on, Alf.
It's wonderful!
Eh?
It's wonderful!
- Hi.
- Hi.
How did you get here?
Phil dropped me off.
Right, let's deal with that goose.
The goose, Nick.
I thought you came
up at lunch time?
I did and it wasn't here.
He promised it for this afternoon.
I don't believe it.
He still hasn't delivered it yet.
Snow is falling
Snow on snow
Snow on snow
In the bleak mid ♪
No, no, no. no!
Oh, no!
No, no! Oh, no. No. Oh!
What can I give him?
Poor as I am
If I were a shepherd
I would bring a lamb
If I were a wise man
I would do my part ♪
Shall I bring the manger
in, Mrs. Watkins?
Yes, please, Gina.
You haven't seen Jo, have you?
She popped home
didn't she?
Yes, but that was
over an hour ago.
All right, stop, stop!
I'll try over there.
All right, try again.
I've got to get back
for the nativity play.
- Yeah, I'll go and get some sacks.
- Okay.
Hark, the herald angels sing
Glory to the newborn King ♪
Is it cancelled?
We're just waiting to hear.
The school bus can't
get beyond Blubank.
Oh, George dear, do keep still!
Where's Jo?
She's not back yet.
Look, do you want
to go to the toilet?
Off you go then.
Right.
Most of the cast are still here
and all of the parents who live in
walking distance are happy to stay on.
So, we're going to go ahead.
Right. Well, we'd better
get this lot changed then.
Come on, everybody.
Annie Dodson's gone home,
so we've lost our angel.
After all that trouble we
had making her wings.
How about Katie doing it?
Oh, isn't she a bit young?
Oh, one of the big girls
could hold her hand.
Katie, would you
like to be an angel?
BUS PARTY: Why are we waiting? ♪
It's a longer way
round by quite a bit.
Aye, but a much better road.
I daren't take her
over the top, Doris.
I'm skidding all over as it is.
Ladies and gentlemen.
ALL: Why are we?
In view of the climatic conditions,
we're going to turn back and take the
road through Ashfordly and Aidensfield.
All right?
Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink
about an hour ago ♪
Nothing, the line must be down.
Watkins is gonna be going spare.
- We've got to try the car again.
- There's no point, Jo.
Come on, Phil. This is silly.
Let's get back to Ashfordly.
What?
Who ever heard of Santa Claus
turning round because of snow?
Oh, yes.
But the real Santa,
he's got reindeer!
What do you mean, the real Santa?
Hello?
Anybody here?
Hello.
No sign of anyone.
Mave.
ALL: Aaah!
We can't leave them here, Mave.
- What?
- Not on their own in the cold.
It's all right.
You're all right now.
It weren't my fault.
I weren't driving too fast.
It just went straight up into
the ditch without warning.
What did?
I'm not meant to say.
An old, red truck.
No! No, it had nothing to
do with that old truck.
And I suppose they aren't either?
Oh, he'll kill me!
Oh, Mr. Greengrass will kill me.
Alright. Tell you what we'll do, lad.
We'll drop them into the
police station in Ashfordly.
Mr. Blaketon?
Oh, no!
I told you it would be a nonstarter.
AEROPLANE ENGINE
That's what we need, a plane.
Well, we can't just stay here.
- I don't know.
- Nick!
It sounds like a good idea to me.
Yes, but what about the Nativity
play? And Mum and Dad?
Look, if we're snowed in,
so is everyone else.
The play will be cancelled.
And your mum and dad will be
tucked up safe and sound at home.
So, let's just
Lie back and enjoy it.
Yeah, exactly.
Tell you what, there's a very
nice bottle of wine in the fridge.
- Is there?
- Yeah.
PLANE ENGINE FALTERS
Doesn't sound too good.
CRASHES
All right?
Sophie?
Sophie, tell me you're not hurt.
Sophie, darling, please!
I'm all right.
You sure?
Hugh.
Right.
I'll go and get some help.
- Don't leave me.
- I have to, darling.
No, Hugh, no!
Just phone Daddy,
don't talk to anyone else.
- Promise me.
- Sssh.
Hide, quick!
You don't let anyone see you.
She says her name is Sophie.
- Are you sure there was no-one else?
- Yes.
You flew this on your own, did you?
Yes.
Well, we'd better get
you out of here quick.
I don't want to move.
Sophie, you've got to.
We'll take you down to my cottage.
I can't.
Come on. We need to
get you out of the cold.
Can you manage?
Yeah.
You're pregnant!
How pregnant?
Nearly eight months.
We're coming up to Ashfordly.
You can take the geese
into the police station.
What, me? No!
Come on, you're a big, strong lad.
Albert will help you.
No, I can't take it
in to Mr. Blaketon!
And they can't stay on the
coach either, so you'll have to.
REVS
No, no, it's no good, Alf.
We're going to have to face facts.
We're going to have
to radio for help.
And Blaketon's not going
to be best pleased.
But it's not my fault.
I supposed to be in Whitby,
not here with you.
You offered.
No, you asked me.
GEESE HONK
Ventress!
Bellamy!
I'll have you for this, Greengrass.
Are you going to call him, or not?
Delta Alpha Two One
to Control, over.
Ah, yes, madam, will you just
hold on a minute, thank you.
Bellamy, where the heck
have you been? Over.
"We're stuck on the Aidensfield
Road, sarge. Over."
You're what? Over.
"Stuck in a snowdrift. Over."
Look, I told you, if Ventress wants to
dress up and become Father Christmas,
that's his business. Out!
Yes, madam, we know that
the Whitby road is closed.
We're doing what we can.
Thank you.
Control to Delta Alpha Two One.
Come in, Bellamy. Over.
"Receiving, sarge. Over."
Now look, the phones
are going mad here.
There's no sign of Rowan
and you can tell Ventress,
I'm not just here to take delivery
of his Christmas dinner. Over!
"What should we do, sarge? Over."
Well, use your common
sense, Bellamy.
You stay in the car,
you keep warm,
and you await rescue. Over.
"Alf says, can you send
some ciggies over. Over."
I'll pretend I never
heard that, Bellamy. Out!
People die in situations like this.
Thanks, Alf.
You hear about it.
Only five yards from home,
stuck in a snowdrift
found in the morning,
frozen solid.
Shut up.
You think we should we
cuddle together for warmth?
Give over!
Put the engine on.
I can't go any further.
- Don't worry.
- I'm sorry.
- Can you make it to that barn?
- Yeah.
Are you sure you're not in any pain?
I'm just tired.
Then, I'm sure everything's fine.
It's not far now, Sophie.
The cottage is only five minutes away.
You go back to the cottage and bring
something warm to wrap her in,
and a hot drink.
Sophie, where were
you coming from?
Spain. I live there.
And which airport
were you heading for?
I wasn't going to an airport.
I was going to land at
Mummy and Daddy's,
in the park.
The park?
Northwick Park.
Your parents live
at Northwick Park?
Well then, they'll report it, won't
they, when you don't turn up?
I didn't tell them I was coming.
It was going to be a surprise.
It's getting deeper by the minute.
Oh, dear!
I daren't go much further,
not with old folk on board.
What's the next village?
Aidensfield.
Right. Soon as we get
there, we're stopping.
We'll find somewhere
for them warm to wait,
and go on when the
snowplough's been through.
Miss.
We could take 'em
to the village hall.
I know it'll be open, they've
got Father Christmas coming.
Is it alright for you
with your Santa suit on.
I've given you my hat.
What?
Well 90% of your body heat
goes out through your head.
Anyroad, I'm older than you.
My blood's thinner.
And I need a ciggy.
Alf, if you mention
cigarettes once more
Two hard boiled eggs and a slice
of Christmas cake is all I had.
- Back at the office.
- Shut up.
We could die, you know.
Yes, so you've said,
many times before.
- Well, we could.
- Yes!
I can't help it.
I get like this when I haven't
had regular nourishment.
I've always been the same.
Right. There you go!
And don't eat it all at once.
Come on, come on. There.
And a merry Christmas.
Is your husband still in Spain?
We'll have to get in touch with him.
Fancy living at Northwick Park.
I went round it once
on a school outing.
Sophie, are you getting pains?
It's not due for another month.
It's not ready to be born yet.
It's probably just the shock,
the crash landing and everything.
I need a doctor!
Yes. And when Nick's back,
we're going to get you one.
You're going to be all right.
PHONE RINGS
Yes, what?
Can none of the garages in
Ashfordly help you, Mr. Blaketon?
Yeah, well
Yeah, I suppose I
might know someone.
All right, I do
appreciate the urgency.
In fact, I do know someone with a Land
Rover in Ashfordly, my nephew, Gary.
Yes, I'm sure he'd lend
it for police business.
Matthew, you keep a
hold of Katie, okay?
Curtains all ready, Peter?
Come on.
Stop! Hold everything!
What's the matter? What is it?
Are the toilets through here?
Gents on the left,
ladies downstairs.
- You want to hear my life story?
- No.
- About how I was born in Pickering.
- No.
And after a long and difficult birth,
the doctors didn't think
I'd live through the night.
No!
That's what people do
in situations like this,
they tell their life stories.
Yes? Well, I'm sorry.
I've got to get out.
Oh, no, you haven't, lad.
You're gonna stay
here with Uncle Alf.
And you're gonna hear his life
story whether you like it or not.
Till Blaketon comes to rescue us.
We'll start with how I won the
Pickering district beautiful
babies competition.
KNOCKS AT DOOR
DOG BARKS
I thought you'd emigrated
Who are you?
Hey, hey, Officer.
I don't know what you here for,
but if it's the geese,
I can assure you that,
they're legitimate and paid for.
In fact, I raised them myself,
I don't care what anybody says.
Sheep in wolf's clothing, old man.
I'm not a policeman at all, you see.
What, you mean,
you're not really a copper?
Where did you get the coat?
Never you mind about that.
466, that's Nick Rowan's, ain't it?
Listen, old chap,
let's get down to business.
I need to get to the
nearest town tonight.
- Where would that be, Whitby?
- Yeah.
Good. Can you take me there?
What, go out in this, tonight?
You've got to be joking.
I wouldn't not unless you
make it worth my while.
I'll give you a fiver.
Fiver?
It would have to be twenty.
Okay, a tenner.
In advance.
Five now, five when we get
to Whitby. Take it or leave it.
I'll take it.
All assuming you've got a decent
vehicle to get us there, of course.
I'll sort summat out.
It's getting worse.
- Just try to relax.
- I can't!
- Nothing's going to happen yet.
- It is! I know it is.
I can't stop it! Aaagh!
Nick, she's in labour.
She's got stomach pains.
They're really bad.
Sophie.
Go away. Leave me alone!
How often are the pains?
I don't know. I don't know
anything about having a baby.
It's alright. It'll take ages.
First babies always do.
But it's premature.
It might be born really fast.
Look, the temperature's
below freezing,
we're stuck in a dirty old barn,
no medical help,
no water, nothing.
Oh! Where is he?
Who?
- He should be here.
- Your husband?
Yes.
Look, I know he was on
the plane with you, Sophie.
Can you tell me where he went to?
Leave me alone, will you?
And then
there was Josephine.
Alf, how many girlfriends
did you have?
Josephine Simmonds.
Oh, what a lovely girl she was.
I remember it as though
it was yesterday
upstairs in my
grandfather's pigeon loft.
CAR HORN BLARES
- Hold on.
Somebody's coming.
You idiots!
Can't this thing go
any faster, old man?
No, it can't!
It's a tractor not a
flaming Austin Healey.
I could walk it quicker.
Why don't you get
off and walk then.
You can give me my money first,
otherwise you won't
have a leg to walk with.
Now look here, don't you
threaten me, old man.
You don't stop calling me old man
and you'll get to Whitby
on the end of my boot!
Shut it!
Food. Cigarettes.
Dry clothes.
A hot toddy.
George is bound
to have a nice fire.
What are you two on about?
Aidensfield Arms, sarge,
to get warm up.
Oh no, you're not, Bellamy.
You're coming with me
to help find Rowan.
In case it's escaped your notice,
you're still on duty.
Yes, but I'm not, sarge, and I'd
like to go and get warmed up.
If I get a chill for Christmas,
my mother won't be best pleased.
His mother's a force to
be reckoned with, sarge.
I don't believe this.
What a couple of feeble
milksops you two are!
BABY CRIES
Oh, Nick.
SHOUTING AND CHEERING
Any chance of more cups
from the pub, Gina?
Yes, soon as I've done
these chairs, Mrs. Watkins.
That's enough of that.
No news about Ventress, I suppose?
No.
Oi! Don't do that with Baby Jesus.
Give him to me.
Come on, down here,
all of you. Come on!
He's so small.
- Is he all right?
- Yeah, I think so, but
we got to get him
back to the cottage.
- What, take him outside?
- It's just as cold here.
The most important thing
is maintain his body heat.
Sophie, we've got to get
him back to the cottage.
Now, it's probably best if Jo,
you take him on ahead and
as soon as you feel up to it, Sophie,
we'll get you up there as well, okay.
I'm coming too.
You just rest for a bit.
Okay.
He'll be fine.
Can't you tell me, Sophie?
Where's your husband?
It's all my fault.
I was homesick.
I made him come back
when I knew it wasn't safe.
I thought with Christmas coming
and the baby and everything,
I thought Mum and Dad
might forgive him.
I mean, he was going to pay
back everything, every penny,
but they didn't give him a chance.
And he wouldn't have
left me, only he saw you.
When you came along
What, because I was a policeman?
Sophie?
If anything happens to
my baby, I'll kill myself.
Look, it still says
14 miles to Whitby.
You sure you're
going the right way?
You are talking through my nose.
Why don't I keep the fiver you
gave me and call it a day?
- What?
- Well, this is the road to Whitby.
You're bound to get a lift.
I've brought you more than halfway,
so a fiver's more than fair.
Now, look here, you great country
bumpkin, stop wasting my time!
Hey, hey, watch it.
There must be somebody who's
got a Land Rover, you idiot.
Oh, am I?
Well, as a matter of fact,
I do know somebody
who's got just the vehicle for you.
It's only down the road.
Well, come on, George,
get that fire going.
Come on, I'm dying
of hypothermia here.
And when you've done that,
I'll have a packet of fags.
And a ham sandwich and
a pint of your best, please.
Aren't you on duty,
Father Christmas?
The rules are waived.
That's what Sergeant
Blaketon said, wasn't it?
Aye. By order of the North
Riding Constabulary
in view of the special
climatic conditions.
Oh, and I'll have a couple
of those pickled eggs.
And the same for
young Philip here.
Well, don't hog the fire.
They need urgent
medical attention, Nick.
I've done everything
I can think of.
TRACTOR DRAWS CLOSE
Back in a minute.
Get off me, you moron.
Get him, Nick.
That's your coat he's got on.
Get your hands off me.
How dare you?
Who's a country bumpkin
now, old man?
- Right. You wait there.
- Right.
Hey! Don't forget it's me
that nabbed him first.
So if there's a reward I want it.
He still owes me a tenner.
- It's Greengrass on a tractor.
- A tractor?
He can drive me to a phone
box to get an ambulance.
- You'll be alright?
- Just be quick.
Don't say anything.
I think I've found her husband.
I would like to extend a warm
welcome to the Elsinby Evergreens.
We hope you'll enjoy
our little entertainment.
And now, with apologies
for the late start
we will carry on with
our nativity play.
PIANO INTRODUCTION:
Once In Royal David's City
Once in Royal David's city
Stood a lowly cattle shed
Where a mother laid her baby
In a manger for his bed ♪
I need a snowplough,
a Land Rover,
and someone to come up
and dig out my patrol car.
Look, I don't care about Whitby,
there's a foot of snow up here.
Call me back.
Sarge, can you take
charge of this man?
I've got a bit of emergency.
I need to find Maggie Bolton.
What's going on?
Oh, can I have a word with
you in private, please, sarge?
Hey, don't forget to tell Blaketon
it's me that captured him
first in the first place.
You wait there.
So, what do you think,
will there be a reward?
I've got a bone to pick
with you, Greengrass
Geese!
There'll be more than
one then, won't
Hey, if that's his wallet,
he still owes me £20.
You outside.
Thank you. And a merry
Christmas to you and all.
Outside!
I don't know who he is or
what he's done, sarge,
but from what I can make out,
he's a wanted man.
Hugh Forbes Moncrieff.
Hang on, that rings a bell.
Where did you find him?
Oh, in a plane.
Well, strictly speaking on a tractor.
It's a long story, sarge.
His wife's just had a baby.
A baby?
And Joseph went up from Galilee
out of the city of Nazareth,
into Judea, the city of David
which he called Bethlehem.
To be taxed with Mary, his espoused
wife, being great with child.
He came down to Earth from Heaven
Who is God and Lord of all ♪
Are you breathing?
Oh, no.
Please, come on.
And she brought forth
her first-born son
and wrapped him in swaddling
clothes and laid him in a manger.
Because there was no
room for them in the inn.
BABY CRIES
Oh, thank heavens!
Away in a manger
No crib for a bed
The little Lord Jesus
Lay down His sweet head
The stars in the bright sky
Looked down where he lay
The little Lord Jesus
Asleep on the hay
The cattle are lowing
The Baby awakes ♪
Just the man I need,
Mr. Greengrass.
Be quiet, be careful.
You've saved my life.
Why, what have I done?
You've played Father Christmas
before now, haven't you?
Yeah, yeah, but hey,
I didn't enjoy it.
Maggie, I need you up at Jo's.
And we've got the antlers.
All right.
Thank you, Mr. Greengrass.
And they were in the same country,
shepherds, abiding in the fields,
keeping watch over
their flock by night.
And lo, the Angel of the
Lord came upon them.
Go on, Katie, go on.
And the angel said, 'I bring
you good tidings of great joy,
which shall be to all people.'
Yes, sarge.
Right away, sarge.
Yeah, I appreciate it's urgent.
Yeah.
Why is it always me?
Go to the station and prepare
the cell for a prisoner, he said.
Prepare the cell?
Remove all inmates.
Something to do with Greengrass.
It's alright for some, eh,
sat by the fire.
Aye, well, I'm off duty.
Hold on.
Well, I can't go either, can I?
I haven't got a car.
Bernie could take you.
Hey, hold on, George.
We'll never get to
Ashfordly in his van.
He's got chains, hasn't he,
at the garage.
- Yeah, but
- Good idea, George.
There's your solution, lad.
Go with Bernie.
I was only thinking.
Urgent, Sergeant Blaketon said.
Right. I need a big strong man to
help me to the school with this lot.
Alf, what are you doing here?
They're all waiting for you!
- What?
- At the village hall.
I thought I'd been cancelled.
No! And you're on in five minutes!
Give us a hand, Uncle George.
Oh, dear, Alf!
Looks like you'd best
get a move on.
Here you go, Alf.
Ho, ho, ho.
Hark the herald angels sing
Glory to the newborn King ♪
Be careful, Mrs. Watkins.
They're high enough,
they're high enough.
Right, ta.
Lovely. Right.
I'm as ready as I'll ever be.
Sssh, everybody.
Can you hear anything?
What's that, children?
ALL: Sleigh bells.
Yes, it's sleigh bells, isn't it?
I think we've got a visitor.
Who is it?
ALL: It's Father Christmas.
Ho, ho, ho.
HO! HO! HO! HO! HO!
LAUGHTER
Claude Greengrass
and his ruddy geese!
No!
What are they doing here?
Folk have been waiting
for these all day.
Right. Well you have to
deliver them on your way back.
What?
He's your friend,
Bernie, not mine.
Thank goodness that's all over.
Hello, Oscar.
Eileen, Katie. Merry Christmas.
Well, Nick, you seemed to
be the hero of the hour.
Really, sarge?
Do you have any idea who your
Mr. Hugh Forbes Moncrieff really is?
Well, no, sarge.
He's been hunted for
the past 12 months
by the keenest police
brains in the Met.
And your Nick, Eileen,
who is still a humble police
constable of modest intellect
he's the one that happens
to have found him.
And here, on my patch.
Well done.
Well, thank you, sarge.
I'll take Katie upstairs.
So, what did he do, sarge?
Well, he only nicked £100,000
from a major charity, that's all.
Does he know about the baby yet?
I thought I'd leave
that pleasure to you.
Come to have a peep,
have you, constable?
The big fish you so cleverly
caught in your tiny little net.
I've come to tell you
about your wife.
She's had the baby.
A boy.
Well, I never. A boy.
Is Sophie all right?
Yeah, I think so.
And the baby?
Well, premature babies
He's on the way to the hospital.
I see.
She so desperately
wanted to come back.
I should never have risked it.
A little beauty, isn't he?
The man who crashed his plane
and then left his wife alone
in a blizzard to have a baby.
Excuse me, sarge.
Oh, Nick! It's going to
be all right, the baby!
Maggie and I just took
him to hospital, Nick.
They think he's going to be okay.
I'd better tell him.
Well, I'm going to go and get all
the food back from the cottage
and make a meal here for everyone.
Right, I'll come with you.
Right, as you are.
Right, that'll do you.
Thanks for the lift, Maggie.
I'll be back in about an hour.
Oh, and be on your best behaviour,
the boss is coming to supper.
- Eh?
- Eileen's invited Blaketon.
Thanks, Maggie.
Oh, what a day.
I can't believe that Sophie's husband
would just abandon her like that.
He did care,
that's the funny thing.
Oh yes. He still ran away and
left her, though, didn't he.
£100,000. I mean,
what did he actually do?
Well, some city fiddle.
He's a stockbroker, apparently.
Cooked the books, eh?
Don't ask me. I'm just a humble
constable of modest intellect.
I beg your pardon?
It's a little compliment
I had from my boss.
Nick.
I just want to look at you.
I don't want to be looked at.
There's something I've
been meaning to ask you.
I've got to get the food organised.
We can put it all in this.
The veg is already in the saucepan,
so we can just take the whole lot.
Will you listen to me?
And the tin of cooked ham which
we can use instead of the goose.
(HONKING)
No!
It's not funny, Nick.
I'm going to kill Claude Greengrass.
What am I supposed to do,
kill it with my bare hands?
Hang on.
What are you doing?
Well, if we do it now, we can
cook it in time for a late supper.
- No.
- Bit of stuffing?
- Don't you dare touch it.
- Roast potatoes.
I'm turning vegetarian.
I'm going to keep her as a pet.
Give me that!
Alright. Only if you
say you'll marry me.
What?
(PUTS DOWN CLEAVER)
Will you marry me?
Heartbeat
Why do you skip when
my baby's lips meet mine?
Riddle dee pat and
sing to me love's story
And bring to me love's glory
Heartbeat
Why do you miss when
my baby kisses me? ♪