Magnum, P.I. (1980) s06e18 Episode Script
Find Me a Rainbow
We're talking about a grown man seducing a 17-year-old girl.
If you believe the gossip.
But I don't think getting back at him is gonna make you feel better.
I don't want to get back at him.
I want to find him because he has Jesse.
Jesse? There is no baby.
Just a lonely girl's fantasy.
Where is Jesse? I really think you'd better be going now.
I don't believe that my son is dead, not for one second.
Because if my son were dead, I would feel it.
You've already taken $3,000 of my money.
McKENNA: Yeah, and it's going to take another grand to keep things going.
Look, that's the way it is in this business.
I have got a dead-solid lead going here.
You've told me that before.
You don't want to screw things up by letting the trail get cold while you stand around here trying to make up your mind.
At least let me see what you've found.
Then you take my lead and go off without me.
I'm sorry, honey.
Doesn't work that way.
The only person looks at Joe McKenna's files is Joe McKenna.
It's my way or not at all.
Then I guess it'll have to be not at all.
If that's the way you feel about it.
I'm not gonna leave without my property.
Your property? Let me tell you something, young lady.
You're kidding me, right? It's mine.
I paid for it.
Please give me my file.
Give it to me! Okay, okay.
Just stay calm.
Like I said, I'll give you your file.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, you're welcome.
Yeah, where to now, lady? Come on, lady.
Where to? Hawaii.
I must've seen a hundred rainbows since I've been in the islands.
But each one just seems to take my breath away.
Despite the best efforts of Mr.
Corkill, my high school science teacher.
He used to lecture our class on light reflections and refraction, polarization and prisms, but I knew.
I knew that that really wasn't what rainbows were all about.
So when I got a C-minus on my midterm, Mr.
Corkill told me that he was really worried that I would go through life not understanding the importance of geometrical optics.
But to tell you the truth, I was a lot more worried Mr.
Corkill might go through life not understanding the importance of a rainbow.
I'm sorry.
Did you say something? Yes.
I was just talking about the rainbow.
It's very pretty.
You know, I must've seen a hundred rainbows since I've been in the islands, but you know, each and every one of them just It just takes my breath Mr.
Magnum? What? Lydia McCarthy.
I'm sorry I'm late.
Oh, well, that's okay.
I got held up.
See you around.
Wait! Can you still see me? Of course.
I've been interviewing with private detectives all morning, and when I asked who was the number one investigator on the island, your name kept coming up.
Really? Mmm-hmm.
That's very flattering to know that my fellow professionals told you I was the best.
Well, actually, your fellow professionals told me they were the best.
Oh.
You were number two.
Number two? Yeah.
It was unanimous.
Well, almost unanimous.
And human nature being what it is, I think that means you're probably the best.
Thomas, do you still want that order? Oh! That's okay, Rosine.
Oh, please.
Have whatever you want.
Bring Mr.
Magnum whatever he's ordered and I'll have one of the same.
No, no, she will not have the same.
Mr.
Magnum, believe me, I can afford it.
Don't worry about it.
No, I wasn't worried about the money.
Oh, you think I'm not old enough to drink? No, I didn't say that.
That's not what I meant.
Because I'm 21 years old.
That's old enough to drink in any state in the union.
I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't treat me like a child.
I wasn't.
I wasn't.
I wasn't.
I'm not.
It's just that I just don't drink when I'm meeting with a client.
Bring her whatever she wants.
I'll have a cup of coffee.
Okay.
Thank you.
I want you to find this man.
His name is Donald Burns.
Why? Why are you looking for him? He stole some jewelry from me.
A strand of pearls.
I was told he came out here from New York.
Well, why don't you let the New York and Honolulu Police handle it? I don't want him to go to jail.
He's a thief.
Mr.
Magnum, maybe there's something that you don't He was our family chauffeur for nearly 10 years.
And I just I don't want him to get in trouble.
What is this? Your beer.
I hate beer.
I didn't order beer.
Well, yes, you did.
You said, "Whatever Mr.
Magnum is having.
" Mr.
Magnum is having coffee.
I think I can solve this.
Mr.
Magnum, this necklace is a family heirloom.
It's very important that I get it back.
Here's $500 to get you started.
Oh, no.
Please, don't give me any money now.
All right.
I understand that he came here to work for a Loretta Vanderpost.
Loretta Zachary Vanderpost? Do you think you can get in to see her? I know what you're thinking, and you're right.
Why was I taking on a mundane case about a missing string of pearls and a client who had an annoying habit of treating the world like hired help? Not that I couldn't use a quick $500, that was certainly an incentive.
But the chance to get into a Loretta Vanderpost party, something Higgins had assured me would only happen when snow fell on Diamond Head I suppose that's what actually finalized my decision.
Oh, my God! Higgins, don't.
Don't.
Don't do what I know you're going to do.
Leave the premises immediately before someone sees you.
See? You're getting all worked up again.
I have a perfectly valid reason for being here.
Don't you want to hear it? Certainly not.
I do.
Hi.
I'm Susan Brandes.
I do volunteer legal work for this little band of juvenile delinquents that Lally likes to think of as "under-encouraged.
" And you are? Uninvited.
Thomas Magnum.
Come on, Higgins.
I'm sure if Lally knew me, she would've invited me.
This is an inexcusable breach of decorum.
Please leave immediately.
Yoo-hoo! Oh, Jonny! Lally.
Oh, good.
You've met Susan.
Now isn't she everything I told you she'd be? Indeed.
And he's even more charming than you said he was.
Oh, you little rascal.
Hi.
Thomas Magnum.
The little rascal brought me, too.
I hope you don't mind.
Mind? What a delightful sense of humor.
Why, thank you, Jonny.
How thoughtful.
Camp Kauhale will be an extraordinary opportunity for this handful of young, underprivileged boys.
It was always a big dream of Chester's.
Chester? Chester Zachary lll.
Your late husband.
My first late husband.
He used to say, "There's no such thing as a bad boy.
" It was Father Flanagan who said, "There's no such thing as a bad boy.
" Though I'm not convinced he was right.
Really? I could have sworn it was Chester.
Now, Gerry, on the other hand, was entirely opposite.
Gerry? Your latest late husband? Colonel Gerald Vanderpost.
A very well known and respected man of great vision and energy.
He was more like those young fellows over there.
He couldn't sit still at a party, either.
I'm going to put a stop to this.
Oh, Jonny, sit down.
They've got the rest of their lives to behave.
I don't know who would be more proud of us now, Chester or Gerry.
Oh, now, what is so noble about letting half a dozen young boys run amok for a week? Stop trying to be cynical, Susan.
It doesn't become you.
I propose a toast.
To Susan Brandes, for donating hours and hours of legal work.
And to Jonny, for generously offering the use of Robin's Nest for Camp Kauhale.
Robin's Nest.
Bright and early tomorrow morning.
This has gone too far.
Oh, Jonny, it's only caviar.
Only caviar? Only caviar? You! Young man! Let go of that immediately.
Let me.
I've got plenty of experience myself with egg on my face.
My first late husband, Chester, used to say, "You can spot an honest man "the minute he walks into a place.
" Do you think that's true, Mr.
Magnum? Ms.
Vanderpost Lally.
Lally.
I didn't exactly Well, Higgins didn't really invite me to your party.
I know.
Well, I mean, we are friends.
Well We're sort of friends, but he You know, he That's what I mean about an honest man.
They can't hide deception even when it's for a good reason.
I assume you were lying for a good reason.
I'm a private investigator.
Well, I have a client who believes that you might know the whereabouts of a Donald Burns.
Is your client a young girl by the name of Lydia McCarthy? I'm not surprised she's looking for him.
Though what she's going to do when she finds him, I don't know.
Well, I'm pretty sure all she wants is for him to give back what he took from her.
I'm afraid that's impossible.
If you believe the gossip.
Now, why do I get the feeling that we're talking about something other than a strand of pearls? Because we are.
We're talking about a grown man seducing a 17-year-old girl.
But you told me you'd find him.
And you told me you were looking for a strand of pearls.
Look, I'll pay you $1,000.
Money's got nothing to do with it! I don't work for clients who lie to me.
It's as simple as that.
Look, I mean, I can understand why you want to find the guy.
No, you can't! But I don't think getting back at him is gonna make you feel better I don't want to get back at him.
I want to find him because he has Jesse.
Donald stole my little boy.
You should go to the police, the FBl.
I did.
But a child being stolen by one of his parents They'll look.
But they have so many children to look for.
You're married to Donald? My relationship with Donald is really none of your business.
I'm willing to pay you $1,000 to find him, no questions asked.
Cash.
In advance.
It's dangerous for you to carry this much cash around.
I'll have the desk clerk lock it in the safe for you.
Green 45.
Hut.
Yeah! Go get him! Hurry! Go that way! No! Go that way! That way! Magnum! How could you? Well, I didn't.
I mean, we were just My most prized specimens.
Breakfast! All right! Oh, I'm starving! Come on, let's go! Remember, Higgins, "There's no such thing as a bad boy.
" T.
M.
, you just weren't watching where you were going.
The thing is, your mind just obviously was not on the game.
Yeah, he's still worried about the case he gave up on.
What case? I did not give up, and I'm not worried.
All right, guilty, then.
I'm not guilty, either.
Oh, it sounds so mysterious.
What is it? Drugs? Espionage? Missing persons.
T.
C.
A young girl asked him to help her find her baby.
I'm not sure what she's looking for.
And you never will be now.
I'm sorry I mentioned it, okay? I'm not going on some wild goose chase for a client who lies to me because she thinks money can buy her anything.
I'm not going to do it.
Magnum, telephone.
It's the manager of the Kolona Reef Hotel.
Something about a Lydia McCarthy giving your name as a credit reference.
I assured him that must be some sort of bizarre practical joke, but he was most emphatic.
Lydia McCarthy? I thought she was the one with all the money.
So did I.
Actually, she's probably not the real client anyway.
You know, Thomas, you should be working for that missing kid.
He's the one that really needs your help.
Your surf ski lessons are scheduled for right after breakfast.
I'll be back.
What about the telephone? Have a flapjack.
I've always thought that a certain amount of guilt can be a healthy thing.
Sometimes it can give us a reason to do things that we've told everyone we didn't want to do.
Even if maybe we did.
I'm looking for Donald Burns.
And thanks to an address Lally had given me, I knew I had a shot at checking up on Donald Burns before I went back to see Lydia.
Donald Burns? Donald Burns? Yeah.
I was given your name by a client.
Oh, yeah? All right.
Sorry about this, how're you doing? Thomas Magnum.
Hi.
So a client recommended me, huh? Well, actually, the client is mine.
Lydia McCarthy.
Private detective, huh? Private investigator.
How is she? Well, why don't you come see for yourself? No.
No, I don't think that would be a good idea.
She's gonna have to get over this.
I don't think it'd be helpful if I agreed to see her every time she came running after me.
Well, I think she'd be willing to leave you alone if you gave her back her son.
Lydia.
When I went to work for the McCarthys, Lydia was a very pretty, very unhappy She was desperate for attention.
For love.
I knew I wasn't the guy who was gonna make her happy.
I'm a driver.
I like my job.
I make a good living, but I don't think I would exactly fit into that social circle.
Besides, I'm 15 years older than her.
I tried to tell her she would find somebody someday.
She took it as rejection, tried to get back at me.
Convinced her father that I had had my way with her.
He dismissed me.
I moved as far away as I could.
She keeps coming after me.
When she's not tracking me down, the gossip is.
Do you know how difficult it is to keep a job with the long arm of old man McCarthy reaching out? There's no baby.
Just a lonely girl's fantasy.
I'm afraid I can't tell you the nature of the case.
You'll be well compensated.
You don't need to know the details.
I think anybody you hire is going to want to know what he's looking for.
Professional ethics.
How did you get in here? Professional secret.
You changed your mind about the money.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I figure that I'll take you back on for Oh, three thousand.
Cash.
$3,000, cash.
I I don't I can get you $3,000, but Why don't you tell me what's really going on? I didn't think I'd see you again.
Neither did I.
Why did you come back? Well All of a sudden, I got this really strange idea.
I got this idea that you don't have any money at all.
I'm Lydia McCarthy.
Oh, I know.
I know.
I didn't mean that your family doesn't have money.
But I figured, maybe, for some reason Like maybe your family doesn't want you doing this? Looking for your boy? And that you didn't have any money right now, and that you were almost out of cash and you were doing your best, trying really hard, to hold it together and not ask for help.
Not really ask for help.
Is this close? Maybe.
So, I thought to myself, "What kind of person would do something like this?" And I came up with two possibilities.
Either somebody who was a little bit crazy and was making the whole thing up Or? Or, somebody who was very courageous.
"Courageous" is Father Damien, or Rocky Balboa.
I just want to find my son.
Why don't we go talk to Donald Burns? Why didn't you tell me that you'd seen him? I had to make sure you didn't make the whole thing up.
You did lie to me a couple of times.
Meanwhile, you let him get away.
I did not let him get away.
They said he went home sick.
Well, it's possible.
Lot of flu going around.
At least you got his address.
Maybe he's around back.
He's still here.
Mr.
Magnum! Look! His favorite toy.
Lydia, a lot of kids have teddy bears.
Bloomingdale's.
There's only one of these.
We've found him.
How long do these stakeouts usually take? Oh He's gotta come home sometime.
Jesse loves rainbows.
Of course, there aren't too many of them in New York, but one day after a summer storm, there was a giant rainbow.
Jesse said he had to have one just like it for his very own.
He kept saying, "Mommy, find me a rainbow! "Find me a rainbow.
" So I went out and bought him one.
Yeah, I kind of like rainbows, too.
Are you hungry? "Heavenly Meadows Nature Bar.
" I really hate granola.
You don't have any chocolate chip cookies in there, do you? No.
Rolled oats, soy beans I guess granola is an acquired taste.
The yard looks quite nice.
I'll bet the house is clean, too.
Well, I'd hold off on giving Donald the Good Housekeeping Award.
Lydia, there is some evidence to indicate that there might be a lady of the house.
Why didn't you tell me? Well, the evidence was pink and frilly, and it just didn't seem important at the time.
Did you think I'd be jealous that Donald has a new girlfriend? No.
But I thought you might be jealous if Jesse had a new mother.
Jesse.
Excuse me.
My name's Thomas Magnum.
Can I talk to you for a minute? What's going on here? Lydia! What do you think you're doing? Jesse? Ben! Mommy! Mommy! You okay? I'm sorry.
I thought he was my son.
Thank you.
I can't talk very long.
I've got to put the groceries away and finish making supper.
Well, we're not gonna take up much of your time.
Do you have any idea where Donald went? Well, he's usually at work.
If they said he was sick I don't know.
Did Donald ever talk to you about his son? I really think you'd better be going now.
I'm not leaving until I find out what's happened to Jesse.
Lydia.
Donald has been really good to me and my son.
And I'm not about to let you come in here and start making trouble.
Where is Jesse? He's not here! I can't tell you any more than that.
Now would you just please leave? Georgia, if you know something you have to tell us.
I don't! Please, tell me! All right! He's dead! I'm sorry.
Donald told me he died.
Don't worry.
You'll still get paid.
Lydia.
Just send me a bill and I'll send you your money.
I don't care about the money.
But don't think because you're off the case that I'm going to quit looking.
Who said I'm off the case? You can believe her if you want to.
But I don't believe that my son is dead, not for one second.
Because if my son were dead, I would know it.
If my son were dead, I would feel it.
Oh, God.
What if she's right? Now look, Donald lied to you, he lied to me, and probably lied to her.
And I think we should find out.
But it's not going to be easy.
You think you're up to it? I don't know.
I think you are.
Kanaloa, lord of the ocean and ocean winds, most commonly took the form of octopus and squid.
And from time to time, took the form of the banana.
Man, this is great.
Wish I had a camp like this in my neighborhood when I was growing up.
Yeah, you could've use a Lally Zachary in your life.
Oh, it's all a lot of flash and show.
Round up a bunch of scruffy adolescents, declare them underprivileged, and we all just fall all over ourselves trying to make life okay for them.
Methinks the lady doth protest too much.
Oh, please.
Hey, you got any kids of your own? Camp Kauhale.
Yeah.
She's here.
Hold on.
It's your office.
Yes? How do I look? Uh-huh.
Calvin Klein ain't losing no sleep.
I'll be right there.
Hey, you'll be back in time for the luau, won't you? You bet.
I sure will.
and with him died the old Hawaii.
Ruled by Ku, Kane, Lono, and Kanaloa.
At the same time, of course, many practices ended, including human sacrifice.
Though there are arguments for its reinstatement.
Looking at photos of deceased kids is tough duty.
It takes a special kind of guts.
She's just a kid herself.
Well, that's all the files we have from the coroner's office.
Where do we go from here? My guess is, if the kid's not with your husband, there's a good chance He's not my husband.
If he's not with the boy's father, there's a good chance that he's been put up for adoption.
What kind of an agency would take him without my consent? Well, this Burns may not have been entirely honest about the status of the mother.
Or maybe he didn't go through an agency.
I'd say that's a more likely scenario.
There are two or three law firms in town that deal with these difficult adoptions.
You mean illegal.
Not exactly.
Well, what, exactly? Well, say a couple wants a baby.
Can't get one through the agencies.
This attorney knows of a baby, so the couple pays 10, $15,000.
Medical expenses.
You understand? Attorney's fees.
Fifteen thousand dollars.
That's not medical expenses or legal fees, that's buying babies.
Can you give me any of these lawyers' names? We're not talking about any crime being committed here, in the strictly legal sense.
Well, Lydia never agreed to put her baby up for adoption.
Not at any price.
Did you find something? I think so.
It's just not a good idea for you to come to this office.
I told you that.
This exchange was supposed to take place on Tuesday.
Yeah, well, something came up and I can't wait.
You know if anyone connects me with you, I could be disbarred.
All right, you'll get the rest of the money when you drop the child off at the center.
Thank you.
I I also think it's a good idea if we terminate our professional relationship.
Don't worry.
I'm taking the next stage coach out of town.
Come on.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
You see, Jonny? Everything's going just fine.
At least for the moment.
The boys will all be returning to their own homes in approximately Jonny, you're not gonna believe this.
What? Camp Kauhale Yes? We've raised enough money to do this all over again next year! No.
No! Camp Kauhale.
Yes, Mr.
Magnum.
He's right here.
Magnum, where are you? You promise to teach the boys how to surf ski and then you simply disappear.
Have you no sense of obligation, or responsibility? Higgins, I'm sorry.
Something came up.
What could be so important that you would break your word? I don't have time to explain right now.
I need to talk to Susan Brandes.
Luckily for her, she's not here.
Do you know where she went? No.
But someone else called.
She said it was urgent.
She said her name was Georgia and that you would know what it was all about.
I should have never told him you were here.
He got real mad.
He took Ben away.
Your son? Yeah.
He once told me that if I ever did anything to cross him, he'd take away everything I loved.
Where would he go? Georgia, if you know something, Mr.
Magnum can help you.
But he can't find your son unless you tell him the truth.
Well, I don't know if this means anything, but a couple of weeks ago, I found this telephone number in his pants pocket.
I called it.
A lady answered.
I figured he was seeing another woman.
I don't even know why I kept it.
I thought if he ever left me I'd know where to get him.
I don't think she's a girlfriend.
Susan Brandes.
May I help you? Hello? Who is this? All the way back to Waikiki, I kept telling myself we were going to find the end of the rainbow.
That no matter what Mr.
Corkill had said in ninth-grade science, there was a pot of gold at the end.
And right now its name was Jesse.
And that this time, the rainbow wouldn't vanish into air and mist as soon as we got close.
That's what I kept telling myself.
Even though I knew the chances of that happening were pretty remote.
There was no question in my mind that Donald Burns had recently taken Georgia's son to Susan Brandes, just as he had taken Jesse to her some time ago.
But I had no way of knowing what had happened to the boys from there.
And no way of protecting Lydia from what I might learn if it was bad.
Beautiful Saturday, and here you are, working? I don't mind working hard.
It's the only way to get ahead.
What are you doing here? I could have sworn I locked that door.
I believe we have a mutual client.
Donald Burns.
You probably met him through Loretta Vanderpost.
You know, if this is a business call, I'm afraid you're gonna have to make an appointment.
Oh, I'm sure you can make some time for a friend of Lally's.
I mean, she set you up in your law firm here, sent you one or two influential clients to kind of get the practice off the ground.
And what if she did? Well, I just figured that once she found out you're dealing in the black-market baby business That sounds remarkably like blackmail, Mr.
Magnum.
Blackmail's such an ugly concept.
Like selling babies.
If you had anything, you'd go to the police.
Only as a last resort.
Well, what do you want? Donald Burns.
Well, I can't give him to you.
Well, then I guess I got no other choice.
Oh, you've got it all figured out, don't you? The world is so black and white to you? Some things are.
Well, it's not so simple.
Let me tell you a story, Mr.
Magnum.
It's about a 16-year-old girl who got herself into trouble.
This is a girl from a big family, no money, no chance of keeping the baby and giving it any kind of a decent life.
So she found a lawyer.
A guy who knew of a very wealthy couple who desperately wanted their own baby girl.
The couple paid all of her medical expenses plus a little more, a little gift for carrying the baby and taking good care of it till it could be adopted.
Now I ask you, who's so hurt by this? The baby, who has a chance at a decent life? The couple, who finally has the family that they've always longed for? The girl, who has an opportunity to make something of her life before she has children? You left one thing out.
You made that choice.
They all do.
I mean, they may carry on a bit, pull out all the dramatics to convince everybody, mostly themselves, that they don't have a choice, but they do, and they've made that choice.
I didn't.
I'm sorry about the other people who want him.
But he's my son.
I'm not giving him up.
Do you have any idea what this means to my career? To my life? There's a holding house there.
Mr.
Magnum, I I only did what I thought was best for everybody.
What if What if he doesn't remember me? Hey, you'd be surprised what kids remember.
It's Ben.
Hi, Ben.
Hi.
You having fun on the swing? Yes.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Enough.
Enough.
Where are we going? We're going home, okay? Donald, where is Jesse? It's too late, Lydia.
He's not here.
They already took him away.
Jesse! Jesse! For the first time since the day I sat in ninth-grade science, I began to consider that Mr.
Corkill was right, that rainbows may be nothing more than optical illusions.
Jesse.
Hi, Mommy.
But if rainbows are optical illusions, in order to see them you have to have the sun at your back and the rain in front of you.
The rain was all behind Lydia now, and she could be content with something even better.
Holding on to a little rainbow of her very own.
If you believe the gossip.
But I don't think getting back at him is gonna make you feel better.
I don't want to get back at him.
I want to find him because he has Jesse.
Jesse? There is no baby.
Just a lonely girl's fantasy.
Where is Jesse? I really think you'd better be going now.
I don't believe that my son is dead, not for one second.
Because if my son were dead, I would feel it.
You've already taken $3,000 of my money.
McKENNA: Yeah, and it's going to take another grand to keep things going.
Look, that's the way it is in this business.
I have got a dead-solid lead going here.
You've told me that before.
You don't want to screw things up by letting the trail get cold while you stand around here trying to make up your mind.
At least let me see what you've found.
Then you take my lead and go off without me.
I'm sorry, honey.
Doesn't work that way.
The only person looks at Joe McKenna's files is Joe McKenna.
It's my way or not at all.
Then I guess it'll have to be not at all.
If that's the way you feel about it.
I'm not gonna leave without my property.
Your property? Let me tell you something, young lady.
You're kidding me, right? It's mine.
I paid for it.
Please give me my file.
Give it to me! Okay, okay.
Just stay calm.
Like I said, I'll give you your file.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, you're welcome.
Yeah, where to now, lady? Come on, lady.
Where to? Hawaii.
I must've seen a hundred rainbows since I've been in the islands.
But each one just seems to take my breath away.
Despite the best efforts of Mr.
Corkill, my high school science teacher.
He used to lecture our class on light reflections and refraction, polarization and prisms, but I knew.
I knew that that really wasn't what rainbows were all about.
So when I got a C-minus on my midterm, Mr.
Corkill told me that he was really worried that I would go through life not understanding the importance of geometrical optics.
But to tell you the truth, I was a lot more worried Mr.
Corkill might go through life not understanding the importance of a rainbow.
I'm sorry.
Did you say something? Yes.
I was just talking about the rainbow.
It's very pretty.
You know, I must've seen a hundred rainbows since I've been in the islands, but you know, each and every one of them just It just takes my breath Mr.
Magnum? What? Lydia McCarthy.
I'm sorry I'm late.
Oh, well, that's okay.
I got held up.
See you around.
Wait! Can you still see me? Of course.
I've been interviewing with private detectives all morning, and when I asked who was the number one investigator on the island, your name kept coming up.
Really? Mmm-hmm.
That's very flattering to know that my fellow professionals told you I was the best.
Well, actually, your fellow professionals told me they were the best.
Oh.
You were number two.
Number two? Yeah.
It was unanimous.
Well, almost unanimous.
And human nature being what it is, I think that means you're probably the best.
Thomas, do you still want that order? Oh! That's okay, Rosine.
Oh, please.
Have whatever you want.
Bring Mr.
Magnum whatever he's ordered and I'll have one of the same.
No, no, she will not have the same.
Mr.
Magnum, believe me, I can afford it.
Don't worry about it.
No, I wasn't worried about the money.
Oh, you think I'm not old enough to drink? No, I didn't say that.
That's not what I meant.
Because I'm 21 years old.
That's old enough to drink in any state in the union.
I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't treat me like a child.
I wasn't.
I wasn't.
I wasn't.
I'm not.
It's just that I just don't drink when I'm meeting with a client.
Bring her whatever she wants.
I'll have a cup of coffee.
Okay.
Thank you.
I want you to find this man.
His name is Donald Burns.
Why? Why are you looking for him? He stole some jewelry from me.
A strand of pearls.
I was told he came out here from New York.
Well, why don't you let the New York and Honolulu Police handle it? I don't want him to go to jail.
He's a thief.
Mr.
Magnum, maybe there's something that you don't He was our family chauffeur for nearly 10 years.
And I just I don't want him to get in trouble.
What is this? Your beer.
I hate beer.
I didn't order beer.
Well, yes, you did.
You said, "Whatever Mr.
Magnum is having.
" Mr.
Magnum is having coffee.
I think I can solve this.
Mr.
Magnum, this necklace is a family heirloom.
It's very important that I get it back.
Here's $500 to get you started.
Oh, no.
Please, don't give me any money now.
All right.
I understand that he came here to work for a Loretta Vanderpost.
Loretta Zachary Vanderpost? Do you think you can get in to see her? I know what you're thinking, and you're right.
Why was I taking on a mundane case about a missing string of pearls and a client who had an annoying habit of treating the world like hired help? Not that I couldn't use a quick $500, that was certainly an incentive.
But the chance to get into a Loretta Vanderpost party, something Higgins had assured me would only happen when snow fell on Diamond Head I suppose that's what actually finalized my decision.
Oh, my God! Higgins, don't.
Don't.
Don't do what I know you're going to do.
Leave the premises immediately before someone sees you.
See? You're getting all worked up again.
I have a perfectly valid reason for being here.
Don't you want to hear it? Certainly not.
I do.
Hi.
I'm Susan Brandes.
I do volunteer legal work for this little band of juvenile delinquents that Lally likes to think of as "under-encouraged.
" And you are? Uninvited.
Thomas Magnum.
Come on, Higgins.
I'm sure if Lally knew me, she would've invited me.
This is an inexcusable breach of decorum.
Please leave immediately.
Yoo-hoo! Oh, Jonny! Lally.
Oh, good.
You've met Susan.
Now isn't she everything I told you she'd be? Indeed.
And he's even more charming than you said he was.
Oh, you little rascal.
Hi.
Thomas Magnum.
The little rascal brought me, too.
I hope you don't mind.
Mind? What a delightful sense of humor.
Why, thank you, Jonny.
How thoughtful.
Camp Kauhale will be an extraordinary opportunity for this handful of young, underprivileged boys.
It was always a big dream of Chester's.
Chester? Chester Zachary lll.
Your late husband.
My first late husband.
He used to say, "There's no such thing as a bad boy.
" It was Father Flanagan who said, "There's no such thing as a bad boy.
" Though I'm not convinced he was right.
Really? I could have sworn it was Chester.
Now, Gerry, on the other hand, was entirely opposite.
Gerry? Your latest late husband? Colonel Gerald Vanderpost.
A very well known and respected man of great vision and energy.
He was more like those young fellows over there.
He couldn't sit still at a party, either.
I'm going to put a stop to this.
Oh, Jonny, sit down.
They've got the rest of their lives to behave.
I don't know who would be more proud of us now, Chester or Gerry.
Oh, now, what is so noble about letting half a dozen young boys run amok for a week? Stop trying to be cynical, Susan.
It doesn't become you.
I propose a toast.
To Susan Brandes, for donating hours and hours of legal work.
And to Jonny, for generously offering the use of Robin's Nest for Camp Kauhale.
Robin's Nest.
Bright and early tomorrow morning.
This has gone too far.
Oh, Jonny, it's only caviar.
Only caviar? Only caviar? You! Young man! Let go of that immediately.
Let me.
I've got plenty of experience myself with egg on my face.
My first late husband, Chester, used to say, "You can spot an honest man "the minute he walks into a place.
" Do you think that's true, Mr.
Magnum? Ms.
Vanderpost Lally.
Lally.
I didn't exactly Well, Higgins didn't really invite me to your party.
I know.
Well, I mean, we are friends.
Well We're sort of friends, but he You know, he That's what I mean about an honest man.
They can't hide deception even when it's for a good reason.
I assume you were lying for a good reason.
I'm a private investigator.
Well, I have a client who believes that you might know the whereabouts of a Donald Burns.
Is your client a young girl by the name of Lydia McCarthy? I'm not surprised she's looking for him.
Though what she's going to do when she finds him, I don't know.
Well, I'm pretty sure all she wants is for him to give back what he took from her.
I'm afraid that's impossible.
If you believe the gossip.
Now, why do I get the feeling that we're talking about something other than a strand of pearls? Because we are.
We're talking about a grown man seducing a 17-year-old girl.
But you told me you'd find him.
And you told me you were looking for a strand of pearls.
Look, I'll pay you $1,000.
Money's got nothing to do with it! I don't work for clients who lie to me.
It's as simple as that.
Look, I mean, I can understand why you want to find the guy.
No, you can't! But I don't think getting back at him is gonna make you feel better I don't want to get back at him.
I want to find him because he has Jesse.
Donald stole my little boy.
You should go to the police, the FBl.
I did.
But a child being stolen by one of his parents They'll look.
But they have so many children to look for.
You're married to Donald? My relationship with Donald is really none of your business.
I'm willing to pay you $1,000 to find him, no questions asked.
Cash.
In advance.
It's dangerous for you to carry this much cash around.
I'll have the desk clerk lock it in the safe for you.
Green 45.
Hut.
Yeah! Go get him! Hurry! Go that way! No! Go that way! That way! Magnum! How could you? Well, I didn't.
I mean, we were just My most prized specimens.
Breakfast! All right! Oh, I'm starving! Come on, let's go! Remember, Higgins, "There's no such thing as a bad boy.
" T.
M.
, you just weren't watching where you were going.
The thing is, your mind just obviously was not on the game.
Yeah, he's still worried about the case he gave up on.
What case? I did not give up, and I'm not worried.
All right, guilty, then.
I'm not guilty, either.
Oh, it sounds so mysterious.
What is it? Drugs? Espionage? Missing persons.
T.
C.
A young girl asked him to help her find her baby.
I'm not sure what she's looking for.
And you never will be now.
I'm sorry I mentioned it, okay? I'm not going on some wild goose chase for a client who lies to me because she thinks money can buy her anything.
I'm not going to do it.
Magnum, telephone.
It's the manager of the Kolona Reef Hotel.
Something about a Lydia McCarthy giving your name as a credit reference.
I assured him that must be some sort of bizarre practical joke, but he was most emphatic.
Lydia McCarthy? I thought she was the one with all the money.
So did I.
Actually, she's probably not the real client anyway.
You know, Thomas, you should be working for that missing kid.
He's the one that really needs your help.
Your surf ski lessons are scheduled for right after breakfast.
I'll be back.
What about the telephone? Have a flapjack.
I've always thought that a certain amount of guilt can be a healthy thing.
Sometimes it can give us a reason to do things that we've told everyone we didn't want to do.
Even if maybe we did.
I'm looking for Donald Burns.
And thanks to an address Lally had given me, I knew I had a shot at checking up on Donald Burns before I went back to see Lydia.
Donald Burns? Donald Burns? Yeah.
I was given your name by a client.
Oh, yeah? All right.
Sorry about this, how're you doing? Thomas Magnum.
Hi.
So a client recommended me, huh? Well, actually, the client is mine.
Lydia McCarthy.
Private detective, huh? Private investigator.
How is she? Well, why don't you come see for yourself? No.
No, I don't think that would be a good idea.
She's gonna have to get over this.
I don't think it'd be helpful if I agreed to see her every time she came running after me.
Well, I think she'd be willing to leave you alone if you gave her back her son.
Lydia.
When I went to work for the McCarthys, Lydia was a very pretty, very unhappy She was desperate for attention.
For love.
I knew I wasn't the guy who was gonna make her happy.
I'm a driver.
I like my job.
I make a good living, but I don't think I would exactly fit into that social circle.
Besides, I'm 15 years older than her.
I tried to tell her she would find somebody someday.
She took it as rejection, tried to get back at me.
Convinced her father that I had had my way with her.
He dismissed me.
I moved as far away as I could.
She keeps coming after me.
When she's not tracking me down, the gossip is.
Do you know how difficult it is to keep a job with the long arm of old man McCarthy reaching out? There's no baby.
Just a lonely girl's fantasy.
I'm afraid I can't tell you the nature of the case.
You'll be well compensated.
You don't need to know the details.
I think anybody you hire is going to want to know what he's looking for.
Professional ethics.
How did you get in here? Professional secret.
You changed your mind about the money.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I figure that I'll take you back on for Oh, three thousand.
Cash.
$3,000, cash.
I I don't I can get you $3,000, but Why don't you tell me what's really going on? I didn't think I'd see you again.
Neither did I.
Why did you come back? Well All of a sudden, I got this really strange idea.
I got this idea that you don't have any money at all.
I'm Lydia McCarthy.
Oh, I know.
I know.
I didn't mean that your family doesn't have money.
But I figured, maybe, for some reason Like maybe your family doesn't want you doing this? Looking for your boy? And that you didn't have any money right now, and that you were almost out of cash and you were doing your best, trying really hard, to hold it together and not ask for help.
Not really ask for help.
Is this close? Maybe.
So, I thought to myself, "What kind of person would do something like this?" And I came up with two possibilities.
Either somebody who was a little bit crazy and was making the whole thing up Or? Or, somebody who was very courageous.
"Courageous" is Father Damien, or Rocky Balboa.
I just want to find my son.
Why don't we go talk to Donald Burns? Why didn't you tell me that you'd seen him? I had to make sure you didn't make the whole thing up.
You did lie to me a couple of times.
Meanwhile, you let him get away.
I did not let him get away.
They said he went home sick.
Well, it's possible.
Lot of flu going around.
At least you got his address.
Maybe he's around back.
He's still here.
Mr.
Magnum! Look! His favorite toy.
Lydia, a lot of kids have teddy bears.
Bloomingdale's.
There's only one of these.
We've found him.
How long do these stakeouts usually take? Oh He's gotta come home sometime.
Jesse loves rainbows.
Of course, there aren't too many of them in New York, but one day after a summer storm, there was a giant rainbow.
Jesse said he had to have one just like it for his very own.
He kept saying, "Mommy, find me a rainbow! "Find me a rainbow.
" So I went out and bought him one.
Yeah, I kind of like rainbows, too.
Are you hungry? "Heavenly Meadows Nature Bar.
" I really hate granola.
You don't have any chocolate chip cookies in there, do you? No.
Rolled oats, soy beans I guess granola is an acquired taste.
The yard looks quite nice.
I'll bet the house is clean, too.
Well, I'd hold off on giving Donald the Good Housekeeping Award.
Lydia, there is some evidence to indicate that there might be a lady of the house.
Why didn't you tell me? Well, the evidence was pink and frilly, and it just didn't seem important at the time.
Did you think I'd be jealous that Donald has a new girlfriend? No.
But I thought you might be jealous if Jesse had a new mother.
Jesse.
Excuse me.
My name's Thomas Magnum.
Can I talk to you for a minute? What's going on here? Lydia! What do you think you're doing? Jesse? Ben! Mommy! Mommy! You okay? I'm sorry.
I thought he was my son.
Thank you.
I can't talk very long.
I've got to put the groceries away and finish making supper.
Well, we're not gonna take up much of your time.
Do you have any idea where Donald went? Well, he's usually at work.
If they said he was sick I don't know.
Did Donald ever talk to you about his son? I really think you'd better be going now.
I'm not leaving until I find out what's happened to Jesse.
Lydia.
Donald has been really good to me and my son.
And I'm not about to let you come in here and start making trouble.
Where is Jesse? He's not here! I can't tell you any more than that.
Now would you just please leave? Georgia, if you know something you have to tell us.
I don't! Please, tell me! All right! He's dead! I'm sorry.
Donald told me he died.
Don't worry.
You'll still get paid.
Lydia.
Just send me a bill and I'll send you your money.
I don't care about the money.
But don't think because you're off the case that I'm going to quit looking.
Who said I'm off the case? You can believe her if you want to.
But I don't believe that my son is dead, not for one second.
Because if my son were dead, I would know it.
If my son were dead, I would feel it.
Oh, God.
What if she's right? Now look, Donald lied to you, he lied to me, and probably lied to her.
And I think we should find out.
But it's not going to be easy.
You think you're up to it? I don't know.
I think you are.
Kanaloa, lord of the ocean and ocean winds, most commonly took the form of octopus and squid.
And from time to time, took the form of the banana.
Man, this is great.
Wish I had a camp like this in my neighborhood when I was growing up.
Yeah, you could've use a Lally Zachary in your life.
Oh, it's all a lot of flash and show.
Round up a bunch of scruffy adolescents, declare them underprivileged, and we all just fall all over ourselves trying to make life okay for them.
Methinks the lady doth protest too much.
Oh, please.
Hey, you got any kids of your own? Camp Kauhale.
Yeah.
She's here.
Hold on.
It's your office.
Yes? How do I look? Uh-huh.
Calvin Klein ain't losing no sleep.
I'll be right there.
Hey, you'll be back in time for the luau, won't you? You bet.
I sure will.
and with him died the old Hawaii.
Ruled by Ku, Kane, Lono, and Kanaloa.
At the same time, of course, many practices ended, including human sacrifice.
Though there are arguments for its reinstatement.
Looking at photos of deceased kids is tough duty.
It takes a special kind of guts.
She's just a kid herself.
Well, that's all the files we have from the coroner's office.
Where do we go from here? My guess is, if the kid's not with your husband, there's a good chance He's not my husband.
If he's not with the boy's father, there's a good chance that he's been put up for adoption.
What kind of an agency would take him without my consent? Well, this Burns may not have been entirely honest about the status of the mother.
Or maybe he didn't go through an agency.
I'd say that's a more likely scenario.
There are two or three law firms in town that deal with these difficult adoptions.
You mean illegal.
Not exactly.
Well, what, exactly? Well, say a couple wants a baby.
Can't get one through the agencies.
This attorney knows of a baby, so the couple pays 10, $15,000.
Medical expenses.
You understand? Attorney's fees.
Fifteen thousand dollars.
That's not medical expenses or legal fees, that's buying babies.
Can you give me any of these lawyers' names? We're not talking about any crime being committed here, in the strictly legal sense.
Well, Lydia never agreed to put her baby up for adoption.
Not at any price.
Did you find something? I think so.
It's just not a good idea for you to come to this office.
I told you that.
This exchange was supposed to take place on Tuesday.
Yeah, well, something came up and I can't wait.
You know if anyone connects me with you, I could be disbarred.
All right, you'll get the rest of the money when you drop the child off at the center.
Thank you.
I I also think it's a good idea if we terminate our professional relationship.
Don't worry.
I'm taking the next stage coach out of town.
Come on.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
You see, Jonny? Everything's going just fine.
At least for the moment.
The boys will all be returning to their own homes in approximately Jonny, you're not gonna believe this.
What? Camp Kauhale Yes? We've raised enough money to do this all over again next year! No.
No! Camp Kauhale.
Yes, Mr.
Magnum.
He's right here.
Magnum, where are you? You promise to teach the boys how to surf ski and then you simply disappear.
Have you no sense of obligation, or responsibility? Higgins, I'm sorry.
Something came up.
What could be so important that you would break your word? I don't have time to explain right now.
I need to talk to Susan Brandes.
Luckily for her, she's not here.
Do you know where she went? No.
But someone else called.
She said it was urgent.
She said her name was Georgia and that you would know what it was all about.
I should have never told him you were here.
He got real mad.
He took Ben away.
Your son? Yeah.
He once told me that if I ever did anything to cross him, he'd take away everything I loved.
Where would he go? Georgia, if you know something, Mr.
Magnum can help you.
But he can't find your son unless you tell him the truth.
Well, I don't know if this means anything, but a couple of weeks ago, I found this telephone number in his pants pocket.
I called it.
A lady answered.
I figured he was seeing another woman.
I don't even know why I kept it.
I thought if he ever left me I'd know where to get him.
I don't think she's a girlfriend.
Susan Brandes.
May I help you? Hello? Who is this? All the way back to Waikiki, I kept telling myself we were going to find the end of the rainbow.
That no matter what Mr.
Corkill had said in ninth-grade science, there was a pot of gold at the end.
And right now its name was Jesse.
And that this time, the rainbow wouldn't vanish into air and mist as soon as we got close.
That's what I kept telling myself.
Even though I knew the chances of that happening were pretty remote.
There was no question in my mind that Donald Burns had recently taken Georgia's son to Susan Brandes, just as he had taken Jesse to her some time ago.
But I had no way of knowing what had happened to the boys from there.
And no way of protecting Lydia from what I might learn if it was bad.
Beautiful Saturday, and here you are, working? I don't mind working hard.
It's the only way to get ahead.
What are you doing here? I could have sworn I locked that door.
I believe we have a mutual client.
Donald Burns.
You probably met him through Loretta Vanderpost.
You know, if this is a business call, I'm afraid you're gonna have to make an appointment.
Oh, I'm sure you can make some time for a friend of Lally's.
I mean, she set you up in your law firm here, sent you one or two influential clients to kind of get the practice off the ground.
And what if she did? Well, I just figured that once she found out you're dealing in the black-market baby business That sounds remarkably like blackmail, Mr.
Magnum.
Blackmail's such an ugly concept.
Like selling babies.
If you had anything, you'd go to the police.
Only as a last resort.
Well, what do you want? Donald Burns.
Well, I can't give him to you.
Well, then I guess I got no other choice.
Oh, you've got it all figured out, don't you? The world is so black and white to you? Some things are.
Well, it's not so simple.
Let me tell you a story, Mr.
Magnum.
It's about a 16-year-old girl who got herself into trouble.
This is a girl from a big family, no money, no chance of keeping the baby and giving it any kind of a decent life.
So she found a lawyer.
A guy who knew of a very wealthy couple who desperately wanted their own baby girl.
The couple paid all of her medical expenses plus a little more, a little gift for carrying the baby and taking good care of it till it could be adopted.
Now I ask you, who's so hurt by this? The baby, who has a chance at a decent life? The couple, who finally has the family that they've always longed for? The girl, who has an opportunity to make something of her life before she has children? You left one thing out.
You made that choice.
They all do.
I mean, they may carry on a bit, pull out all the dramatics to convince everybody, mostly themselves, that they don't have a choice, but they do, and they've made that choice.
I didn't.
I'm sorry about the other people who want him.
But he's my son.
I'm not giving him up.
Do you have any idea what this means to my career? To my life? There's a holding house there.
Mr.
Magnum, I I only did what I thought was best for everybody.
What if What if he doesn't remember me? Hey, you'd be surprised what kids remember.
It's Ben.
Hi, Ben.
Hi.
You having fun on the swing? Yes.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Enough.
Enough.
Where are we going? We're going home, okay? Donald, where is Jesse? It's too late, Lydia.
He's not here.
They already took him away.
Jesse! Jesse! For the first time since the day I sat in ninth-grade science, I began to consider that Mr.
Corkill was right, that rainbows may be nothing more than optical illusions.
Jesse.
Hi, Mommy.
But if rainbows are optical illusions, in order to see them you have to have the sun at your back and the rain in front of you.
The rain was all behind Lydia now, and she could be content with something even better.
Holding on to a little rainbow of her very own.