The Sopranos s06e20 Episode Script

Fuck you doing? Scared the piss out of me.
Some things you don't get into over the phone.
Got it.
Lorraine's at mass.
Watch out for Spencer.
- Who? - Her fucking toy terrier's a shit machine.
I talked to some of the guys about your misgivings.
Yeah? Listen, I've made a decision.
Take a walk in there.
What the fuck you waiting for? Get lost.
Historically, Carmine always said the Sopranos Are nothing more than a glorified crew.
Plain and simple, we decapitate And we do business with whatever's left.
- What? - Nothing.
I agree in spirit, but I gotta counsel.
This thing should have been done during John's era.
They got redundant upper management-- Bleeds off half the kick.
We take 'em out, absorb the whole fucking thing.
Take out an entire fucking family? Let me tell you a couple or three things: Forget Coco.
Forget fat dom Who goes over to Jersey and never comes back.
Forget my brother Billy.
Phil, Phil, that's not what I'm saying at all.
Anthony Soprano has no respect for this thing.
He's never been in the can, not really.
He's a guy who stepped over his own uncle to grab the big seat-- His father's brother.
- Please, huh? - I'm embarrassed.
I let him come to the hospital last Christmas And I took his fat fucking hand in friendship.
Philly, you had a heart attack.
Listen to me.
They make anybody and everybody over there.
And the way that they do it is all fucked up.
Guys don't get their finger pricked.
There's no sword and gun on the table.
- Phil.
- No, Alb.
Either it has meaning or no meaning.
And the Vito thing-- the man harbors a faggot.
- it's true.
- Five fucking families And we got this other pygmy thing over in Jersey.
There's no scraps in my scrapbook.
Make it happen.
I like the way she played basketball yesterday.
Almost got my first hard-on in, like, a month.
Jesus, what's the meaning of quiet time around here? - Rhiannon? - A.
J.
? Jesus.
What are you doing here? You first.
I have some food issues, depression.
- You keep up with Hernan? - He's a fucking slimeball.
I caught him finger-banging my cousin on the ski lift.
Well, somebody said you were modeling.
Yeah, I guess.
I signed with elite.
So you would say he's responding to the therapy.
Well, we don't do traditional therapy per se.
Kids in crisis mostly need an environment of calm, No stresses.
Do you want this? Or I can pop it in the mail.
Just one more week of this.
$2,200 a fucking day.
Gabagool', provolone And vinegar peppers.
You believe this fucking weather? End times, huh? Ready for the rapture.
How's the antiterror going? Great if you don't like sleeping, eating or seeing your kids.
Listen, those arabs from the bing-- - Mm-hmm.
- Let me ask you the truth.
They're in Jordan, right, getting their balls zapped? You're not gonna tell me? I'm not really sure.
For all we know, They may be harmless pistachio salesmen.
Don't get so bent out of shape.
You're a big boy, Tony.
You know, World War II, your outfit protected The Brooklyn navy yard.
You think Roosevelt told Vito Genovese - Where Hitler was holed up? - Go fuck yourself.
Tony, Tony, hold up.
Tony.
What? Look, I appreciate what you did giving us those names.
In fact, I've been sitting here thinking Remember that thing I told you about that was supposed to happen About a year ago, your problem with Brooklyn? It's on again possibly.
You, maybe people close to you.
If it was real solid, you would have been warned officially By the Newark office, but my colleague in Brooklyn, The one with the collaborator, Snitch is implying the wheels have already been set in motion.
Implying.
Where the fuck you been? Krista fell off her shoes last night.
We had to call an ambulance.
I had some shit I was taking care of.
You're gonna want a snort.
Come on, I just finished my bialy.
Take it.
Burt Gervasi, he's gone.
What happened? I didn't want to overload you with A.
J.
In the hospital.
I don't wanna hear that.
Go.
Burt let me know the other night He's been playing both sides of the fence with New York.
- Burt? - Measures were taken.
Burt wasn't speaking for just himself.
Guys are getting squeezed hard To sway them towards new management.
They thought you'd be a part of it.
And he got an answer.
My hope is maybe now Phil gets the message.
- You know, we can talk this shit through.
- Talk? Talking about Phil.
- We're gonna hit first.
And this all dovetails with other information I got that this cocksucker Already has a target on my back.
It's a big move.
So Buddha.
When he stuck you with the tab for Vito Jr.
, I said let it go.
Obviously, truth is, a fuck like Phil, Appeasement don't work.
Oh, yeah.
Three pops within a tight time frame, for them to hit back.
Top three guys.
- Paulie Gaultieri? - No, management.
Tony Soprano, obviously, Plus Silvio Dante and we think Bobby Baccalieri.
That mortadella's number three? He used to be junior Soprano's driver.
And you used to sell laser printers out the back of your crown vic.
- You really slept.
- Yeah.
I wasn't asleep.
You want some oatmeal? I'll make some.
You want instant or the real thing? I have half and half.
I can't find my belt.
It must be up there somewhere.
What? You hid it.
I'll make the real thing.
- You'll let me know when it's ready? - Sure.
You know, my game has got-- Code six.
I have a casualty.
He's urgent.
i response, The insurgents unleash a devastating wave Of ieds - and suicide bombers.
who got hit? You got contact with them? on a small but deadly road who's that gunner right there? Anthony.
Regarding our friend with the gray hair-- I thought about it.
I want you to call Italy, Get some cousins of ours over.
Who you want to run the thing? Got it.
Gotta get some tires for Carmela's car.
- The wine's amazing.
Jennifer's our resident italian wine expert.
Is Megan still in Prague, Stace? Jesus, her love life.
The girl she was involved with, Cecily, She's now having a torrid pen-and-paper relationship With an armed robber in Attica.
What is this fascination with criminals? Rescue fantasy.
They think they can fix them.
I'm worried for Cecily.
So I googled any new stuff on sociopathic personalities.
Apparently, the talking cure Actually helps them become better criminals.
It was fascinating.
The study was by Yochelson and Samenow.
Studies turn around every few years.
This other, I think it was Robert Hare, Suggested that sociopaths Actually quite glibly Engage on key issues, like mother, family.
I seem to remember that from residency.
Me too, and I've read Hare, But who's a true sociopath? I had a guy at the state asylum, Slow poisoner.
They even mimic empathy.
They blubber and cry.
Did you put her up to this? She just happened to mention this study? - Who? Me? - Everything okay down there? I don't know.
It's a study.
Food for thought.
She's blowing us off.
You just can't resist rubbing my face in it.
I feel like we should change the subject.
I only suggested you reevaluate your work With leadbelly or be prepared to deal with moral And possibly legal consequences.
- Leadbelly? - Who's that? Come on.
The answer is a female opera singer And gangster Elliot! Soprano.
- Tony Soprano? He's your patient? - Wow.
- That's pretty cool.
- Jesus Christ, Elliot.
Chill out.
We're among friends.
We're all professionals.
So what's your verdict on the wine, Jen? All italians have big noses.
If I had made that joke about other groups Represented at this table, I would be called a bigot.
I meant italian reds.
Still, it must be fascinating work.
It is.
Have a seat.
- What's up? - Phil Leotardo.
Calls were made to zips.
They're coming over from Naples.
You contact the guy to contact the guys.
Phil's at his goomar's every Friday night.
- T know about this? - What? - What kind of question is that? - Watch your fat fucking mouth.
Hey, whoa whoa whoa whoa.
What are you concerned about? I lived through the '70s by the skin of my nuts When the columbos were going at it.
There ain't a bigger cocksucker than Phil Leotardo.
I just wanna make sure somebody knows There could be a line of cozarellis a mile long.
Duly noted.
So there's no problem then.
The criminal's sentimentality reveals itself in compassion for babies and pets.
The criminal uses insight to justify heinous acts.
Therapy has potential for noncriminals; for criminals it becomes one more criminal operation Don't worry about them.
Paulie, those guys are outside.
Fuck you talking so loud for? Don't discuss this until we're in the piscia dun.
It's all yours.
I just picked 'em up at the airport.
Anthony.
So what do you clear a year around here? I don't mean to pry, you know, just round numbers.
I'm asking because Meadow-- Well, I told you she's taking pre-med classes-- Well, she's not gonna be a doctor.
She told us.
It's kind of sad, isn't it? Depends.
It's just a nice thing to be, Helping sick babies.
Her change of heart bothers you? Her mother too, much more than me.
I mean, all that worrying-- Which private school, columbia university, This and that, and in the end She'll get married, squeeze out some kids After what, a couple yea in the work force? - I'm still working.
- Yeah, but you're divorced.
Criminal law, that's what she's taking up.
And I told Carmela, it's not the end of the world.
She's interested In civil rights-- Muslims and blacks And that and a dime.
Hopefully, she'll wind up at a big firm-- White-collar crime.
Just, you know, Dr.
Soprano.
Sounds nice.
Your parents must have been very proud.
I think so.
Look at all the people like me you've helped.
With all the human suffering in this world, You've done something important Like those people Who are trying to help my son.
God bless 'em.
$2,000 a day in that place, But if it helps-- And as you know, my plumbers' union insurance Only covers 10% of mental.
He's really hurting-- A.
J.
And you? Although, maybe, you know-- You know what? Forget his hurts.
Maybe I should have just-- Put your shoe up his ass? Yeah yeah, frankly.
Well, we talked about this.
Untalked about it.
Huh? - Anyway, Carmela-- - Molly coddled him.
- My old man-- - Are you a shining example For the huge collection of wingtips and loafers That must be lodged up your lower bowel? What's the matter with you? Is it because I said that about being divorced? You were saying.
He's my only son.
He's young.
Most of the time they pull out of this.
But I've been depressed for years.
What if he don't pull out? So the boy who never cared About anything Now cares about too much.
Yeah, I guess.
And the daughter, like all females, Ultimately somehow disappoints.
- I didn't say that.
- Oh.
What's with the tone? You sound like you're glad I'm taking it on the chin.
Maybe you're projecting hostile feelings.
Bullshit.
If we had instant replay, You'd see it in two seconds.
Well, we don't have instant replay.
I know that.
Jesus Christ, you sound like my fucking wife.
- Your "fucking wife.
" - You know what I mean.
The "departures" magazine out there, Did you give any thought at all To someone else who might wanna read it - Before you tore out the entire page? - What? It's not the first time you've defaced my reading materials.
You saw that, huh? People tear shit out of your magazines all the time.
They're a mess.
I try to read 'em.
I don't think I can help you.
Well, change 'em.
Bring in some new shit.
I mean, therapeutically.
What are you talking about? I've only missed three appointments since we had that heart-to-heart.
The new big thing these days is called "psychodynamic therapy" Combined with anafranil.
- Who? - A medication.
There's a doctor in bloomfield You could see.
Whoa whoa whoa whoa, okay.
Now what the fuck is this? You're firing me 'cause I defaced your "departures" magazine? I'm giving you my considered medical opinion.
Okay, I should have asked you For the steak recipe.
And missing sessions, unfortunately, is part of my condition.
What do you know about your condition? You miss appointments because you don't give a shit About commitments, about what I do, About the body of work that's gone into Building up this science.
Go ahead, tell me again I sound like your wife.
Well, if the shoe fits We're making progress.
It's been seven years.
Do you want some names? Okay, listen, I'm gonna tell you something And you're not gonna like it, - But we can say anything in here, right? - Go ahead! I'm chalking this all up To female menopausal situations.
You're not my gynecologist.
Well, you don't need a gynecologist to know which way the wind blows.
So wait a minute, You're telling me After all this time, After everything we shared in here, You're cutting me loose just as my son got out of the hospital For trying to kill himself? Since you are in crisis, I don't want to waste your time.
I'm gonna be fucking honest.
As a doctor, I think what you're doing is immoral.
Yes.
d.
H.
L.
- Who? - Package-a, D.
H.
L.
Express for mr.
Philip.
For sign.
For sign.
What are you doing? Dad! Dad! They have shot me, daddy.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
- It's done.
I think the love interest got in the way, though.
Couldn't be helped apparently.
You ever see Phil with the goomar? Once maybe.
Why? Could he talk to her in ukrainian? Ukrainian? The fuck do I know? I gotta go.
Paulie, it's done.
Listen, I-- I quit therapy.
And this time I'm never going back.
Except for that slight improvement around the shooting, She wasn't doing you much good anyway.
Here we go.
- Hi, strangers, how are you? - How are you? - Good, not bad.
- Good good.
There they are.
So mead' was in here With patrick parisi.
- Yeah.
- We are very happy.
Very happy.
Is it true what she said? She's quitting pre-med? Yes, thank god.
We are so relieved.
You know, with aids and It's not just that.
I don't know one doctor who is advising his children To go into medicine.
Between the insurance companies Over their shoulder, The hospitals are making cutbacks She'd have been good at it, though, mead'.
Always intellectually curious, even as a tyke.
But does compassion come naturally to her? Patience? I'm not so sure.
What are you talking about? So what is she gonna do now? - Well - Law.
- Oh! - Constitutional law.
- Oh! - Oh, wow.
What about A.
J.
? How's he doing? - He's good.
He's good.
- Good.
Ton', you know who's in tonight? "mangenius.
" The's the jets coach, sweetie.
- I should go say hello.
- Okay.
So Mead' and Patrick Parisi? Little awkward though, maybe.
Patsy still works for Tony.
He's an underling.
Cupid's dart lands, you know? I'm gonna send some limoncellos over in celebration.
Great.
You don't answer your fucking phone? - I tried you 50 times last night.
- Nah, we shut 'em off.
Gab came down with a terrible case of food poisoning.
You can pass the word upstairs.
The gray goose is gone.
- Good.
- Apparently, the goomar had to be taken out too.
But I say, who gives a fuck? Remember that drunken fucking scene she caused at the "Jersey boys" party? I actually felt bad for Phil.
What's the matter? Whenever I think of that fucking play, I picture ma dying alone Like a dog on that bus.
You're gonna make someone happy with this news today.
Think I'll ask for some time off.
Hey, who does this look like? Look.
Don't cry.
Good little girls don't cry.
Babies cry.
Hey.
- How's it going? - Good.
Have my card game.
Carm volunteered to take Nica.
Emptying the pool, huh? - Cost a fortune to heat.
- Yeah.
What can I do you for? Had a call from Mario Diaco.
- Who's that? - Uncle Jun's accountant, The one with the artificial voice spot.
Says he's trying to reach you For two weeks.
Uncle Jun's finally out of money.
They think that maybe there's some squirreled around, But he can't remember.
It's a fucking sin, isn't it? Plus, with the larynx, he thinks Mario's From outer space, so The upshot is he can't pay For living at wycoff psychiatric anymore, And they're gonna move him to a state facility.
I know, Tony, But Jesus, those fucking places are snake pits.
Then he'll make some new friends.
I understand.
You gonna bail him out? We don't have that kind of money.
We'd contribute.
Bobby feels You know.
Right.
You got a lot of balls coming to me.
And as for your husband, Janice, - "Exile on main street.
" - Don't say that.
You trust a guy, you bring him along And for what? He feels sorry for junior? Bullshit.
Ton', it's bad news.
Paulie said he wants it known it's on him, He takes full responsibility, But that he didn't do nothing.
Shit.
Yeah, nobody, I mean nobody, knows where the fuck Phil is, Four, five days now.
So we never really had a shot at him.
How about the house in Florida? I had beans send somebody past.
The house is all shuttered up.
He put everything in place, his moves on us.
He goes into hiding, waits it out.
Going to ground, they call it.
Who? It's an expression.
Who knows what the fuck he's got planned exactly.
You get word to everybody: eyes in the back of your head, Break routines, collections, all that shit.
- You tell everybody.
Got it.
In the meantime, we keep trying.
Get a 20 on Phil.
- Beautiful.
- You never see a blue comet In that condition.
I mean, look at the coaches.
Every window still lights up.
If that train still ran New York to A.
C.
, Atlantic City would be a much different place today.
- Better class of people.
- I suppose.
Who the fuck really knows? Still, it's nice to think that.
Imagine riding in that club car, Sipping on a negroni.
Eight grand for the whole set, huh? There's other people interested.
I'm gonna go for it.
Your son will like this too.
Looks fast.
He don't care.
- Hurry up, for Christ's sake.
- All right, aspett'.
If I'm gonna be working away from the office, I should have this stuff.
You wanna make yourself useful? Get the girls' pay slips over there.
Put 'em in a bag.
Or give 'em to me.
Come on.
All right.
Let's go.
- Yeah, that's them there.
- Fuck! What the fuck? - Let's get the hell out of here.
Wait here.
Melissa found a memory stick in my prada bag that wasn't printed.
God, remember what a dick this guy was at first? Yeah.
I need to talk to you.
- Nobody called you? - No.
What's the matter? Bobby's dead.
He's shot.
Sil's in the hospital.
- What happened? - Could be several things.
- "leave here"? What are you talking about? - just temporarily, - till we get the situation under control.
- what does that mean? Carm, help me out here.
Don't argue.
- You mean they're after you.
- We should split up.
You and the kids go.
I'll be somewhere else.
- Oh my god! - Now look, Families don't get touched.
You know that, hmm? I just wanna know Every night that you're not sitting here out in the open.
Where should I go? Where are you gonna go? The house you just bought, - The estate sale-- go there.
- Oh, Jesus.
A hotel then.
It doesn't fucking matter.
- Okay.
- You all right? All right, we gotta get moving.
And like I said, it's just a precaution.
- What about your sister? - She's gotta know by now.
We'll stop over there after we're cleared out of here.
- And Gab? How bad is Sil? - We'll make some calls.
- Maybe I should go on ahead of you over to Jan's.
- Carm - Meadow is basically living at Patrick's, thank god.
A.
J how are you gonna get him to go along? - He won't leave the house.
- He's gonna leave the house.
- Tony - On a piece of plywood If necessary, but he's gonna leave the house.
Anything I can do? - No.
- You heard? - Or maybe I should just leave.
- I'll call you.
It says shukrijumah brought nuclear material Into the country from mexico in 2002.
Fuck.
Leave us alone, hon.
- Hang downstairs.
- Better yet, don't.
You just bust in? We could have been doing anything.
Yeah, but what were you doing? Nothing.
We're just friends.
All right, listen.
Come, sit .
Come on.
Your uncle Bobby's dead.
- What? - He's dead.
He got shot.
- What do you mean, "he got shot"? - Listen to me, And I don't have any time to go into a debate about any of this, okay? And it's important that we all leave For a little while until things settle down.
What? Holy fuck.
It's just a precaution.
The point is that I'm gonna be dependent on you to help out your mother.
- Help out how? - Just do what she asks, You know, chores, tasks, Whatever.
And don't add to the problem.
What do you mean? What the fuck did I do? Don't break her balls, all right, huh? Just help her With Aunt Janice, whatever.
Uncle Bobby's dead.
Yeah.
This is really depressing to me.
He was a good guy.
I was already having so much trouble maintaining.
My tailbone! Here, pack a bag.
Now! And you won't need no sandals or fucking resort wear.
I'll be waiting downstairs.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
I called the hospital.
They wouldn't give no info on Sil.
Gab's brother finally phoned back.
Doctors don't think he'll recover consciousness.
look at the stems on blondie.
Heh! He's riding high.
Nice to be young, huh? I'm gonna bunk down here.
All right, you go take care of your wife, That flu.
- You too.
- Where the fuck I gotta be? Yeah, I'm gonna stay.
We order a pizz'.
Yeah.
Get some meatballs and sausage too.
- Couple of salads.
- No vegetarian pizza.
You probably don't even hear it when it happens, right? - Ask your friend in there, on the wall.
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