9-1-1 (2018) s07e01 Episode Script

1
You seem unsettled, Sergeant Grant.
[ATHENA] I suppose so.
I'm not usually one to bring
my troubles to strangers.
Tell me what's going on.
So, last week, my husband
he did something. He
booked us on a cruise.
A cruise?
It's kind of a belated honeymoon.
I mean, Bobby is so excited.
This trip means the world to him.
- I wouldn't want to spoil it.
- Why would you?
Because the idea of even
setting foot on that boat
fills me with dread. I'm terrified.
Do you have any idea where this
anxiety might be coming from?
No, I know exactly.
♪
[TV ANNOUNCER] ABC presents
a world television premiere.
Irwin Allen's The Poseidon Adventure!
[CAPTAIN] [ON TV] Get my binoculars.
[LOOKOUT] [ON TV] I don't know,
I-I never saw anything like it.
Oh, my God.
[PEOPLE SCREAMING ON TV]
- [CRASHING]
- [SCREAMING CONTINUES]
[SCREAMING CONTINUES]
What?
So, you're saying you're traumatized
by a TV movie you saw
when you were a child?
A major motion picture.
Shelley Winters was even nominated
for Best Supporting Actress
at the Oscars that year.
Did she win?
No, she did not.
You don't think there
might be some other reason
you're feeling anxious about
going on this cruise with your husband?
I just told you that a man fell
through a damn upside-down skylight.
What about that don't you get?
Sergeant Grant, my best advice?
Pack some extra Dramamine and
try not to think about Titanic.
Poseidon.
I'm sure you'll be fine.
[THUNDER CRASHING]
[ALERT BEEPING]
- [GASPS]
- I love you.
I love you. I love you.
Where are you calling from, sir?
San Fernando Valley. Uh, maybe Tarzana?
My plane's about to crash!
Is this a light aircraft?
No. F-16.
"F" as in fighter jet?
Yes! I'm a pilot with
your Air National Guard.
I was on a training
exercise. I lost comms,
then I lost engine control,
then I lost my plane.
Civilian air traffic's been alerted.
I dispatched an RA unit to
our pilot. And a ladder truck.
Just spoke to the Air National Guard.
They did lose contact
with one of their aircraft.
Well, can they tell us where it is now?
Unfortunately, they cannot.
Doesn't it have a transponder?
After a pilot ejection,
the plane thinks it's in enemy
territory and stops transmitting.
It's supposed to gradually
descend to the ground.
The only words in that
sentence that worry me
are "descend" and "ground."
[TV NARRATOR SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
[VACUUM WHIRRING LOUDLY]
Can you stop?
I'm midway through the Battle of Midway!
[WHIRRING STOPS]
This chair is disgusting.
I want it out. It
doesn't go with anything!
- It goes with me.
- Well, then fine. Then it can go.
With you.
[WHIRRING RESUMES]
- [WHIRRING STOPS]
- [MUTTERS]
- [ENGINES ROARING ON TV]
- [SIGHS]
[TV NARRATOR] These are the dive-bomb
[ENGINES ROARING]
[BOTH SCREAMING]
- [SIRENS WAILING]
- [HORN HONKING]
[INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER]
Bobby sure picked the right
day to leave for his honeymoon.
No way anybody survived this.
Oh, thank God. The
firefighters are here, Abe.
My husband, he's stuck in his chair.
Which is not unusual.
- Ma'am? Let me take a look at you.
- Yeah?
- [EDNA] Okay.
- Is there anyone else in the house?
No, it's just us. We never had children.
And animals don't like her.
Sir, try not to move your neck.
Okay, can you wiggle your toes for me?
[GROANS] No.
And I-I can't feel my legs, either.
It's kind of
it's kind of hard to breathe.
All right, we're gonna
get you out of here. Buck!
Yeah. Coming. Okay, on three.
Ready? One, two
[BUCK AND CHIMNEY GRUNTING]
Okay, hey, what if we chain the
wreckage to the ladder truck,
- try and tow it off him?
- [HEN] No.
Looks like this plane is
holding up whatever's left
- of this house.
- [CHIMNEY] All right.
We're gonna have to cut
him out of this chair.
No! Don't cut the chair!
Yes! Please cut the chair.
He loves the chair
more than he loves me.
For once I'm not arguing with her.
- Ma'am?
- Yeah?
May I please ask you to
go with this firefighter?
Okay. All right.
[SNIFFS, COUGHS]
I don't think that's fuel.
Might be hydrazine.
All right, either way, we
start cutting this chair,
I worry about sparks.
We just need to clear a space
so that we can slide him out.
What do we suppose this is?
Exactly what you think it is.
[HEN] A dummy bomb?
Yeah. That's right.
Can it be ejected so I
can get to my patient?
Yeah, no problem.
You just have to defuse it first.
You just said it was a dummy bomb.
Well, it is. It's for the target range.
It's still an explosive. It's
not like it's gonna blow up
the whole neighborhood or anything.
Probably just the house it's in.
Maybe the one next door.
Captain Wilson, the National
Guard is sending up a team now.
They should be there within the hour.
Our patient may have a spinal
injury or worse. We can't wait.
[PILOT JOE] You don't have to wait.
It'll be fine. I'll talk you through it.
Okay, Joe. We're ready.
[PILOT JOE] Okay, first carefully remove
the trigger housing from the nose.
- [BUCK] There you go.
- [WHIRRING]
Trigger cap is removed. What now?
Okay. Go ahead and snip that red wire.
But first, disconnect the
white low voltage coupling.
Where's Edna?
She's been evacuated to a safe place.
Good. Can she stay there forever?
Sarcasm. I am familiar.
Who's being sarcastic?
A fighter jet crashes
into my front parlor
and not even one of us
gets put out of my misery?
You're dark, Abe.
Spend three decades with
Edna, you would be, too.
Okay, Joe. Voltage
coupling disconnected.
Okay, go ahead and cut that green wire.
[BUCK] Wha uh
Green? You you said red.
- Did I?
- [EDDIE] Yeah.
- You said red.
- Are you sure?
Yes! Yes! You said red.
[PILOT JOE] Okay, okay, uh
uh, let's go with red.
What the hell is wrong with this guy?
[HEN] He just fell 10,000 feet.
It's possible he's not
thinking that clearly.
- [GROANING]
- [CHIMNEY] Hey.
Hey, hey, Abe. Stay with me, pal.
Hey, guys? We need to get this
thing off of him, like now.
What are we gonna do here, Cap?
Cut the red one.
His disorientation is
just now presenting.
Let's go with his first instinct.
Cut the red one.
[AIR HISSES]
[CHUCKLES] Guys, hey! Guys!
Guys!
[INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER]
[SIGHS HEAVILY]
It's best to just keep you like this
until they can take a look
at you at the hospital.
Apologize for the delay.
They still haven't repaired
that piece of the I-10
that collapsed last year.
[HEN] Major, can I ask a question?
When disarming the payload,
after disconnecting the voltage
coupling: red or green wire?
Red. Obviously.
Obviously.
[EDNA] Abe? Abe?!
Do me a favor? Tell her I died.
Oh, thank God! It's a miracle.
Well, it was touch-and-go
there for a minute,
but I think he's going to be just fine.
What? No.
I meant it's a miracle
that hideous chair
is finally out of my house.
God
What house?
[TV REPORTER] A husband and wife
are lucky to be alive today
when an F-16 with no pilot
How do you suppose that happens?
- I assume something broke.
- No, I mean,
how do two people live
together in the same roof
for 30 years and end up full
of resentment and disdain?
I believe you just
answered your own question.
But you don't think something
like this could happen
- to me and Maddie, do you?
- Hmm,
you don't live in a flight
path. You should be fine.
I was still talking about
resentment and disdain.
[CHUCKLES] I know you were.
That only happens if you let it.
[WHISPERS] So don't let it.
You know what? You are absolutely right.
Good night, O Captain, my Captain.
Uh, hey, so, you have
any plans for the weekend?
I was thinking about go-karting.
Place out in the desert,
supposed to be a blast.
Can't this weekend. Got a big date.
A first date.
I, uh, thought everything
was going great with Marisol?
It's not my date. It's Christopher's.
[CHUCKLES] Oh, no.
He invited this girl from
his math class, Penny,
over on Saturday. Marisol
agreed to help me chaperone.
Oh, I see, so it's actually your date.
Why don't you invite Natalia
go-karting? I'm sure she'd love it.
We, uh, we broke up.
I don't know why I thought
it was such a great idea,
dating a death doula.
To be fair, you had just died.
Yeah, well, that's all she
ever wanted to talk about.
Death, death, death.
Got kind of boring,
to be honest with you.
[CHUCKLES] Well
welcome back to the
world of the living, Buck.
You were missed.
[DOOR OPENS]
Wow, what is that amazing smell?
[LIGHT JAZZ PLAYING]
Short ribs.
You're cooking?
Cooked. Everything is rested and ready.
What is going on?
- Ha.
- Oh.
- Mademoiselle?
- Thank you.
You're welcome.
[SIGHS]
So, I have a proposal.
Again?
A different proposal.
Maddie, today I saw a future
that I never want to have.
A couple who've been
together for 35 years.
Sounds like you're un-proposing.
I'm not. So, this couple,
just the two of them in this
from what I could tell
- tiny house.
- From what you could tell?
Well, there was an F-18
fighter jet in the living room,
which probably made
the place look smaller.
So, two people in this
modest, single-family dwelling.
And, Maddie, they could
not have been further apart.
Something happened to them.
- I know, I took the call.
- No
in life. They allowed
themselves to become alienated,
complacent, calcified.
I mean, they must have
been in love once, right?
One would think.
Who knows when that changed?
I certainly don't.
Let's not let that happen to us.
Deal.
Good.
So, I've been thinking about
how we can avoid all that.
And I'm thinking we should start dating.
Wait, other people?
God, no. Each other.
Let's not calcify.
But don't you think we're a
little past the dating phase?
That's the point
it'll keep things
fresh. I mean it, Maddie.
I don't just want a honeymoon phase.
I want the honeymoon life.
[LAUGHS SOFTLY]
Your eyes are blue ♪
Your kisses, too ♪
I never knew what they could do ♪
I can't believe that
you're in love with me ♪
You're telling everyone I know ♪
I'm on your mind each place you go ♪
They can't believe that
you're in love with me. ♪
[APPLAUSE]
[BAND PLAYING LIGHT JAZZ]
Have I mentioned you look beautiful?
You have. But don't let that stop you.
Well, seems like you've
got your sea legs.
I am doing much better
now, thank you. [CHUCKLES]
[VOICE OVER P.A.] Pull the
life jacket on over your head.
Pull one strap through the blue loop
- on the front of the life jacket.
- Blue loop?
- You see a blue loop?
- Right here.
Ma'am? Uh, you weren't
really required to bring that.
[VOICE OVER P.A.] Shout "Man overboard!"
I looked at the ship's activities guide.
Spa, of course. There's mambo lessons.
Oh, and there's even
a regular AA meeting
weirdly located across from
a bar called the Hidey Hole.
Well, that's convenient.
I thought we could take a look,
- pick some things together.
- Eh.
I think I'll let you choose.
I don't want to choose. I
want us to do this together.
Well, we are together.
Ahoy, table mateys!
Wait.
[LAUGHING]
- What are the odds?
- Oh, my
[CLEARS THROAT]
Lola and Norman Peterson.
[ATHENA GASPS]
- Lola? [GASPS]
- [NORMAN CHUCKLES]
The last time I saw you,
you were flashing
morning rush hour traffic
from a freeway sign.
- In front of a banner of some sort, I recall.
- [LOLA] Yes.
"See me, Norman."
And he did.
Well, we all did.
See me, Norman! See me now?
Not only are we on the same cruise,
we're at the same table.
Oh Oh.
- So this is your table, too?
- Huh.
I mean, ain't that a kick in the head?
- Kinda feels like one, yeah.
- [BOBBY CHUCKLES]
[NORMAN] You know what?
You guys saved our marriage.
- Didn't Athena arrest you?
- She did.
My jail time was the best
thing that ever happened to us.
- Mm.
- Norman visited me every day I served.
How many days was that?
- BOTH: Sixty.
- 60 days?
I was also given a fine.
- And then, when Lola made parole-a ♪
- Okay.
- Stop it. God.
- [NORMAN] we decided
to never let our
marriage get stale again.
In fact, we're in week 105
- of our
- 106.
106 of our second honeymoon.
Excuse me?
We don't count COVID,
because the boats weren't running.
Oh, you've been living on cruise ships?
Yeah, a lot of retirees do.
It's really put the
romance back into our lives.
The ocean is motion, baby.
[LOLA] Oh, my.
[NORMAN] Hey, there's Julian. Jules!
Oh, no, Norman. He's working.
For us.
Hey, Julian!
This guy right here,
oh, my gosh, this is
this is the greatest cruise
director in the business.
He always takes such good
care of us, doesn't he, Lola?
He sure does.
How is everything this evening?
Everything's very nice, thank you.
Hey, how we looking at Mazatlán?
I heard we were running
into some weather.
We're keeping an eye on that system.
It's expected to dissipate.
[NORMAN] Fantastic, 'cause
we are renting bicycles.
- You guys should join us.
- Yes!
- Well, we
- [LOLA] Yes!
[BOBBY] Oh, that sounds Uh
we are still working out our itinerary.
[SHUDDERS] That was exhausting.
[BOBBY] Oh, I don't know.
I think it's kind of sweet
how they reconnected.
[CHUCKLES] I don't like 'em.
That woman is a felon.
60 days and a fine.
Why do I even bother? [SCOFFS]
Now we got to sit with
them for the next two weeks.
You know, we never
have to leave the room.
You and I could hole up in
here together the entire time.
What's the real reason you're
afraid to get on that boat?
It's not because of a movie.
I love my husband, Dr. Frank.
And our life together is a whirlwind.
Everything about it.
But take away that,
take away the chaos,
I'm not sure what's left.
You're afraid you won't have
anything to say to each other.
When it's just the two of us,
who are we?
[GASPS]
[BOBBY] What are you thinking about?
- [KNOCK AT DOOR]
- Oh.
Uh, did you order something?
Nope.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Hopefully we're not intruding.
- [CHUCKLING]
- [NORMAN] Uh, anyway, um
we were just taking a moonlight stroll
up on the deck and we thought
we'd invite you over
for a little nightcap.
- [LOLA] Yeah.
- Ah, well, that's very nice of you,
- but I think
- We'd love to.
That's wonderful.
Great. Great, listen.
We're right here in 607.
Just come over when you're ready.
[LAUGHS] All right.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
- [ATHENA] Okay.
- Okay. All right.
- What was that?
- What?
- You said you didn't like 'em.
- No, I believe what I said was
I don't trust them.
- No, you said you didn't like 'em.
- All right, fine.
So I don't like 'em or trust 'em.
No need to be rude about it.
You coming?
[JOSH] Every day?
That's the spirit.
But forever dating doesn't mean
that you go on an actual date every day.
Oh. So, how often you talking?
Three times a week.
Are you insane?
My opening bid was five.
But Maddie thought with Jee
that might be pushing it a bit.
And not every date has
to be fancy or involved.
It can be simple.
You know, the point is that you
don't ever want to take
your partner for granted,
so that the relationship doesn't
- Calcify.
- Calcify?
- calcify.
- Did you find there was
calcification occurring?
- No, not at all.
- What are we talking about here?
Your relationship or dental hygiene?
We were up pretty late working on it.
We've got the next two months planned.
- Is that a
- Spreadsheet.
Oh. Wow. That probably helps
keep things spontaneous.
Scoff if you must,
but maintaining a healthy relationship
is not unlike maintaining
healthy teeth and gums.
You have to be diligent.
Honestly, Maddie, this whole
thing sounds kind of exhausting.
Yeah, I know.
My prediction for forever
dating is, it's gonna last
for about five minutes.
Oh.
Well, you're wrong, Captain.
Forever dating lasts forever!
I am committed!
[HEN] Or ought to be!
Okay, so it sounds like it went well.
Yeah. I guess.
- What do you mean, you guess?
- Well,
it wasn't too much different
than when he hangs out
with one of his guy
friends, to be honest.
Except only in one case is
there underlying sexual tension.
Anyways, seemed like
they had a lot of fun,
and her mom picked her up around 9:00.
Okay, great. And no hearts were broken.
Well
Your son's got game.
- Yeah, video game.
- [LAUGHS]
- [KIDS GIGGLING]
- [CHUCKLES] Seriously?
- She just left.
- [SCOFFS]
Okay, Chris.
You're supposed to be
brushing your teeth.
Time to say good night to Penny.
Penny? When were you talking to Penny?
- Dad!
- Are you two-timing me?
- I will drag her skinny ass.
- No way.
[EDDIE] Dead serious, man.
That's not all. Went through his phone.
He's got conversations with,
like, five different girls now.
Whoa. So, uh, Christopher is a player.
I don't know where he gets it from.
Not from me.
I married the first girl I dated.
Think you might mean "slept with."
Point is, I'm a nester. I nest.
Well, he might be kind of young to nest.
He's still in the nest.
Wait. So, uh, what did you say to him?
Nothing. Not yet.
Was kind of hoping you would.
Uh me?
Yeah.
I mean, you're always boasting
that you're this reformed player.
I think he'd hear it
better coming from you.
I know he's only 13, but
I just don't want him to, you know
End up like me.
- [CHUCKLES]
- You didn't end up like you.
Is it a total loss? Or is it
Uh [EXHALES]
Not total. [CHUCKLES]
Have a good day.
[SHIP HORN BLOWS]
[JULIAN] [OVER P.A. SYSTEM]
Passengers disembarking
for the day in Mazatlán,
please see crew members
for queuing areas by level.
There's a bus tour, and there
is also a funicular ride.
Takes us up to one of the
oldest buildings in the city,
overlooks the bay.
Uh, wh Bobby?
Do you mind if I take a
rain check on this one?
- A rain check?
- Yeah, I'm I just
I don't feel like hiking today.
There's no hiking. Funicular.
I think I feel a migraine coming on.
Maybe I should just lie down.
Okay, yeah.
- Whatever you need. We'll do
- [LOLA] Morning.
- [NORMAN] Hey, good morning, travelers.
- [BOBBY] Hi.
- [LOLA] Hi.
- You ready to get some culture?
Well, Athena's not
feeling too well today.
Oh, no. Did we keep you up too late?
That may be it. [CHUCKLES WEAKLY]
So we're gonna sit this one out.
- Oh.
- Oh, Bobby. No.
I mean, just because
I'm not feeling well
doesn't mean that you should miss out.
- Well, I
- No, no, no. You go.
Athena, I don't want to
ride a funicular by myself.
[BOTH] Oh. [CHUCKLING]
- [NORMAN] We love a funicular.
- [LOLA] Yes, we do.
We like saying the word.
[BOTH] "Funicular."
See, the word "fun" is
actually in the word. Right?
- Yeah.
- Yeah. See?
You go.
I'll see you tonight.
- Huh? Okay.
- Okay.
- All right.
- Okay.
All right, guys.
- See you later.
- Feel better.
- I will. All right.
- [LOLA] Okay.
[P.A. SYSTEM BEEPS]
Passengers on levels five and six,
please have your passenger
ID medallions handy
[NORMAN] Yeah, five and six. That's us.
You guys go ahead. I'm
gonna stick around here.
[NORMAN] No, no, no. How about
this? We'll hang back with you.
No, no, no, no. You guys go, have fun.
I'm gonna find some things
to do here, check on Athena.
- Okay.
- Uh, okay.
- [LOLA] All right. Great.
- Yeah.
- You're sure? Okay.
- Yeah.
- Have fun.
- All right.
- You, too. Yeah. Fun-icular.
- All right.
- [NORMAN LAUGHS]
- [LOLA] Yeah. See, it's in the word.
[BOBBY] Hi.
I'm Bobby,
and I think my wife is trying
to avoid being alone with me.
And I'm an alcoholic.
[GROUP] Hi, Bobby.
[EXHALES, INHALES] You
[EXHALING]
are a stallion.
You've got this, right?
Clydesdale of love.
[GRUNTS]
Uh-uh-uh ♪
No, sirree, uh-uh ♪
Ah [INHALES]
I'm gonna stick like glue ♪
Stick because I'm ♪
Stuck on you ♪
Uh ♪
Yes, sirree, uh-uh ♪
What took you so long?
Little bubblies for our bubbles?
Like glue ♪
That is a '98 Dom Pérignon.
Hide in my kitchen ♪
Hide in the hall ♪
- [GLASS SHATTERS]
- Ain't gonna do ya no ♪
I guess we can just clean that up later.
- Once I catch ya ♪
- [GLASS SHATTERS]
And the kissing starts ♪
A team of wild horses
couldn't tear us apart. ♪
[SOFIA] Help!
[PANTING]
He's alive.
This is so embarrassing.
No, no, no. No-no
need to be embarrassed.
- Does your friend have a heart condition?
- Not that I know of.
Is he on any medication?
Rogaine, I think.
Okay.
- Buck, check the bathroom.
- Copy.
I don't even know how this happened.
I mean, I know how it
happened we were,
you know, doing it, and then
he got woozy and he started
complaining about chest pains
and he went limp.
Well, mostly.
Because every time I
try to get free, I can't.
What is happening?
Vaginismus resulting in penis captivus.
Vaga-what now?
Vaginismus.
It's the involuntary tensing
of the, of the muscles
surrounding the vagina.
Sometimes a stress response.
Okay, he does have a heart
condition. And male potency pills.
Okay, all right. I don't
think he had a heart attack.
Probably just some severe hypotension
from mixing the nitro with Sildenafil.
What we need to do is get
him out of this hot water.
Well, what about me?
I mean, I-I'll go to
the hospital with him,
but please, not like this.
Maybe give her something
to help her relax.
[SIGHS]
Buck. Switch.
- All right.
- Okay. [GRUNTS]
All right.
- [EDDIE] Got him? Okay.
- [BUCK] Yep, got him.
Hey, what's your name again?
Sofia.
Sofia. Hi, I'm Eddie.
Do you like Jell-O?
Jell-O? Uh, I mean
it's fine?
And what's your favorite flavor?
[SOFIA] I don't know. Lime?
[EDDIE] Okay. So, a while back,
I used to have panic attacks, right?
Nothing helped.
So I played a game called "Jell-O body."
So I want you to close your eyes for me.
Okay.
Now I want you to think about your feet
and feel them turning
into soft lime Jell-O.
- Feel that?
- Uh-huh.
Good.
Okay, let that Jell-O
go up to your calves.
Now up to your thighs
now up to your pelvis
and stomach.
Your whole body is turning into squishy,
bouncy Jell-O.
Now let it run up to your chest
your arms
your head.
You are one giant Sofia Jell-O mold.
- [CHIMNEY] Got him.
- It worked.
There's Jell-O?
Where you're going? Loads of it.
[BUCK] You know, I don't
think I've ever seen
a man turn a woman off with such skill.
It's a gift.
[SOFIA] I feel terrible.
This is all my fault. I pushed too hard.
You pushed too hard?
I told him I thought that
we were getting complacent.
- That we were
- Calcifying?
Uh, I don't believe I used that word.
Well, your heart was in the right place.
And his almost stopped.
I guess at least now I know
it's best not to force things.
In so many ways.
[BUCK] Uh, hey, so your dad
tells me you had a date the other night.
Yeah. Penny.
Penny. [CHUCKLES] Nice.
Uh, she-she's, she's
someone that you like?
- She's nice.
- Good.
H-He told me there might be some
other girls that you like as well.
I like to keep things loose.
Nice, I feel you.
And, listen, it-it's okay,
you know, to-to like more than one girl.
Uh, i-it's maybe less okay
t-to let each one of them
think they're special, though.
You know, it's, uh,
it's-it's kind of like lying.
It's not a lie. They're all special.
Okay, uh, yeah, no, I-I
get that, I do, um
I-I think what it is is when you
tell a girl that she's special,
it tends to make her think
that she's the only one.
And then, when she finds
out that you've been saying
the same thing to a
bunch of other girls,
it makes her feel not
so special anymore.
You know, and then they
talk and you get a reputation
for being a not-so-nice
guy, and-and you want
the ladies to-to think
you're a nice guy, right?
Does it matter?
Uh, wh-what do you mean, does it matter?
They just end up leaving anyway.
Uh, wh-why would you say that?
My mom did.
♪
Uh, Chris, your mom died.
Before that.
She left us.
We loved her, and she left anyway.
I can't remember her voice anymore.
[HORN BLOWS]
[INHALES SHARPLY]
[GRUNTS]
[SOFT JAZZ PLAYING]
Good morning.
Oh. Morning.
- How's the migraine?
- Hmm?
- The migraine.
- Oh.
- Not a trace. [CHUCKLES]
- Ah, good.
You left without waking me up.
You're welcome.
No, not "you're welcome." You snuck out.
I did no such thing.
It's ironic, isn't it?
Here we are, enjoying
this cruise together,
yet we're like two ships
passing in the night.
I feel like you're trying to avoid me.
Hey! Norman.
Morning.
Hey.
Wow, good morning. Nice to see you guys.
How was your excursion?
Oh, great, super. Oh,
yeah, lots of local color.
We-we went to a sacrificial temple,
- so that was fun.
- Ah.
Where's Lola?
Lola is resting.
She got too much sun yesterday,
so I-I don't think we're gonna
see much of Lola anytime soon.
- Oh. Where'd you get those scratches?
- The scratches
I got 'cause we rented
bikes and I-I fell.
On your neck?
There's a lot of Mexican
topiary out there, yeah.
Yeah. [CHUCKLES]
I'm gonna go there's a cruller
with my name on it, and I want
to make sure nobody else gets it,
so I'll leave you to it
- and I'll see you soon. Okay.
- Okay.
Mm-hmm.
- I wonder what's going on there.
- I don't care.
Did you see what you did there?
I came over here to talk to you,
and you called him over.
'Cause I was being friendly.
You keep using these people
that you don't even like
as a wedge between us,
and I'd like to know why.
I am not doing that.
You are. And you tried
to fob me off on them.
Now, there was no fobbing.
There was fobbing.
What there wasn't was a migraine.
You have never had a migraine
that lasted less than three days.
If you didn't want to come
on this cruise with me,
you could've just said so.
[SIGHS]
Of course I want to be here with you.
Of course I do.
And I'm sorry if I
made you feel otherwise.
Okay.
And I didn't mean to pressure
you into choosing activities.
[CHUCKLES] Okay, all right.
- Let's forget it.
- So I made a list.
Oh, there's a list?
It's a list of possibilities.
- What?
- I thought we could start simple:
go lay by the pool.
- Now, see, I could do that.
- Yeah?
- Absolutely. Let's do that now.
- Okay.
Okay. You go and warm
up two deck chairs.
I will go get on my bathing suit
and I will meet you
there in ten minutes.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Ten minutes.
- All right.
- We'll lay by the pool.
All right.
[SIGHS]
[SIGHS]
Ooh. [CHUCKLES] Sorry.
I, uh, heard the lady
staying in this room
wasn't feeling well.
I wanted to check in on her.
- Mrs. Peterson? She's not here.
- No?
No. I didn't even need to make the bed.
It hadn't been slept in.
Is that blood?
Looked like someone had an
accident in the bathroom.
That doesn't concern you?
Oh, no. I see that kind of thing
all the time in my line of work.
♪
[ATHENA] Fell on a cactus, my ass.
Those were nail marks.
And the maid said that the bed
hadn't been slept in all night.
I don't know where he was last night,
but I do know where she wasn't.
And still isn't.
Well, what do you think happened?
I think he killed his wife.
I mean, 106 weeks at
sea with the same person?
Oh, that can only end in a homicide.
You think he pushed her overboard?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't think the murder
happened on the boat.
I mean, they got security
cameras all over the damn place.
- Well, so what about the blood?
- [PHONE CHIMES]
I mean, it could be his.
[WHISPERS] "Do not encourage her."
They got off in Mazatlán,
but I don't think she ever got back on.
And he did mention something about
- a sacrificial temple.
- [HEN] Ath Athena.
- Did you say "sacrificial tentpole"?
- No "temple."
- "Temp " damn it. "Temple."
- Can we Yeah. Yeah, okay.
Okay, let's just hang
up. Let's just hang up.
Wh-What the hell are you doing?
You said it was gonna be
ten minutes. It's been 40.
Bobby, have you not
been paying attention?
Norman Peterson murdered his wife.
No, he didn't, and I think
you're doing it again.
You're making up an excuse to avoid me.
Bobby, that poor woman's
death is not about you.
Although, if you had
gone with them yesterday,
she might still be alive.
I hate to ruin the only
fun you seem to be having
on our honeymoon cruise,
but nobody's been murdered.
So now you're questioning my instincts?
No, Detective, I am
questioning your sanity.
- Come on, let's go.
- Where are we going?
To prove one of us wrong.
[DOOR OPENS]
Uh
Ah.
- Excuse me.
- Oh, good afternoon.
Uh, do you remember the
couple we were sitting with
when you stopped by our
dinner table the other night?
Norman and Lola Peterson. Of course.
Yes, well, my wife and
I are a little concerned,
because we know that Mrs.
Peterson got off at Mazatlán,
but we think maybe she
never got back on the ship.
That is concerning.
Never lost a passenger before.
Ah.
Lola scanned back in yesterday
with her husband at 6:40 p.m.
- Ah.
- Oh, and here she is.
The Blue Buffet.
- Right now?
- She just used her medallion
to purchase two energy juices.
[BOBBY] Oh, okay.
There you go.
Both alive and well.
Okay, fine.
Uh, n-now, you don't
have to rub my face in it.
Now would you like to discuss
the actual death on this boat?
Because I think it
might be our marriage.
Because you would prefer
to believe this sweet,
harmless man would
commit a heinous crime
- rather than enjoy our beautiful
- Bobby.
honeymoon cruise together.
♪
Or he murdered his wife.
Hey, buddy. How's the homework?
Almost done.
♪
So, listen, I was
going through some stuff
and, uh, came across
something that belongs to you.
It's a letter from your mom.
She wrote it when you were real little.
I think she'd want you to have it.
[EXHALES] What's for dinner?
Pizza okay?
Pizza's always okay.
[SHANNON] Dear Christopher,
I'm sure you're wondering where I am.
Or maybe you're not. [CHUCKLES]
You're so young, maybe
you've already adapted
to a world without me.
I hope for that and
fear it at the same time.
You are a beautiful, amazing boy.
I want your life to be happy
and free and full of joy.
And I'm not sure that's
possible with me in it.
[SNIFFLES]
It's okay to hate me for leaving.
I will understand if
you never forgive me.
But please know that I love you, baby.
Even if it's from a distance.
Chris. What kind of toppings
do you want on your pizza, bud?
Hmm?
I'll take the usual.
♪
You got it, pal.
[MADDIE] I am so sorry that I'm late.
Is there any way that we
can call the restaurant
and push the reservation, or oh.
I canceled the reservations.
But I thought that Thursday
was supposed to be a formal date night.
Did I read the spreadsheet wrong?
Forget the spreadsheets,
forget everything I
said the other night.
Does this mean that
we're no longer dating?
I just think it would be a mistake.
Oh, I see.
Plus, we have a wedding to plan.
Well, I guess if you're
breaking up with me,
that's a good consolation.
Something else happen on a call?
It did.
And it made me realize there's
no reason to force anything.
We've already been doing this
whole thing exactly right,
and there's no danger of calcifying.
Not as long as we stay
relaxed.
♪
[LAUGHS SOFTLY]
[HORN BLOWING]
[FIRST MATE] Weather service
is warning a tropical storm
to the south is gaining strength.
All right. Radio the Coast Guard,
let them know we're reversing
course back to Los Angeles,
and I'll make the announcement shortly.
[ATHENA] Good.
I can have detectives waiting
when we dock to make the arrest.
Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
I think you need to talk to him first.
[DOOR OPENS]
Oh, hey, guys.
Wh uh, what's-what's going on?
Mr. Peterson, Sergeant Grant
has brought some
concerns to my attention.
I've agreed to allow her
to ask you some questions.
None of which you're
obligated to answer.
Of course I'll answer questions.
Let's start with this: where's Lola?
- She's resting.
- She's not in your stateroom, Norman.
We know she didn't get back
on the boat in Mazatlán.
And we know that you snuck your
sidepiece on using her passenger ID.
No, no, no, no, now, that's not true.
No, I mean, the woman
is using Lola's ID, yes,
but she's not my sidepiece.
My God, I would never cheat on Lola.
Then who is she?
She's one of them.
They took Lola.
- Who did?
- I don't know.
Look, we-we got off the boat
in Mazatlán, just like we always do.
And we rented bikes,
like we told you we were gonna.
And we got snow cones, and
we went to our favorite spot,
and they were waiting for us.
It was a-a gang of some sort.
They knew our names.
And they kept demanding
that I give them my dongle.
- I beg your pardon?
- Uh, a dongle's a device
you plug into a computer.
Holds data.
Often used to store Bitcoin.
Except I don't have a dongle
and I don't have any Bitcoin,
and I tried telling them that.
I explained it to them, but
they wouldn't believe me.
They took Lola.
And you have no idea who
they thought you were?
[SCOFFS]
Uh, I-I think I do.
There's been rumors
about a retired couple,
resident passengers,
who have been using
the cruise line industry
as a front for international smuggling.
Wait a minute, are you telling me
that these people think Lola and me
are international
smugglers worth millions?
Well, you do fit the profile.
Except I'm a retired
dry cleaner from Encino.
Now, what are we gonna
do? I'm not kidding.
Now, they told me if I did not turn over
that dongle at the next port of call,
they were gonna kill my wife. Now
they know that I'm
talking to you here, right?
They may have already killed her.
I don't think so.
If what you're telling us is true,
then you have something they want.
See if you can find this woman.
She's using Mrs.
Peterson's ID medallion.
- Take her into custody.
- Yes, Captain.
- [GRUNTING]
- [EQUIPMENT BEEPING]
You got to help me. You got to help me.
You're a police officer. When
we get to Puerto Vallarta,
you tell them, all right?
Norman, we're not going
to Puerto Vallarta.
The captain had to turn the ship around.
We're going back to L.A.
There's a storm coming.
- [DISTANT GUNFIRE]
- [PEOPLE SCREAMING]
I think the storm's already here.
Stay on the ground now!
Get down! Stay down!
Stay calm,
- and nobody will be hurt.
- [GUNFIRE]