The Brokenwood Mysteries (2014) s07e01 Episode Script

1
[♪♪]
So join me, Jennifer Furrows.
And moi, Brian Beautemps,
at this week's venue,
the quaint and curious
historic sawmill.
Here in beautiful,
bucolic Brokenwood,
a place that we're sure
is home to
- All things old and beautiful.
- All things old and beautiful.
And cut!
"All Things Old and Beautiful,"
teaser two, take nine.
Seriously. Don't expect me
to do another take.
Jolly good.
Shoot me now.
I'm driving out to your town ♪
Every turn of the wheel ♪
Call me up from your town ♪
Tell me how it feels ♪
I'm going out to your town ♪
Yeah, my heart's
in your town ♪
Love shines on
your town every day ♪
Oh, it's so nice to have some
royal blood in the town.
Afternoon, Detective.
It's lovely to see Jools' face
so happy.
She's fallen on her feet
with that Lord Ashbury.
But I must say,
if I was 10 years younger
- Gina.
- Mike, how nice to see you.
Oh, bringing an heirloom
for appraisal, are you?
A precious gift for my mother.
It is a Russian Yak tusk
known to support men's libido.
Oh.
How exactly does it work?
Russian women fill it
with Horny Goat weed
and slip it under
the pillow of their husbands.
It keeps them awake at night,
creating more opportunity.
What have you got there, Mike?
Uh, just some old 45's.
Country music artists
from the Golden Age.
There goes trouble.
I never picked Trudy Nielsen as
one for an interest in antiques.
Indeed.
Word is that box contains the
severed head of her ex-husband.
Jean, come on.
It's only what I've heard.
Filming will resume
in five minutes.
Take your places, please.
Oh, I'm so looking forward
to meeting Mr. Beautemps.
[♪♪]
And action.
Tell me, where did you get this?
Well, Anthony.
- Oh, your beau.
- My "beau" yes.
It's from his family collection.
Anthony, do come and join us.
He's a bit shy,
but we're putting it up
for a charity auction,
and I thought here was
a good place to generate
some interest, so
Well, of course, being
a Vinkelbraun, this is a rarity.
You're not up there, too?
I'm not one for the limelight.
Hard to put an exact value
on it, but perhaps between
10,000 and 20,0000 dollars
or more,
depending on the buyer.
[ Crowd gasps, applauds ]
Jools, please.
Wait, wait, cut.
Brian, I am the one
who calls cut.
Here we go again.
Alright. Thank you.
Thank you.
Nice to meet you.
I told you it was a silly
waste of time.
JOOLS: But it's for
a good cause, darling.
So these would be
cognac glasses.
- Leeching cups.
- Ah.
My late husband's grandfather
was a doctor in Guatemala.
- Oh.
- Although we used them
for a strawberry mousse
for dinner parties.
But it was the '70s.
Well, it's a blubber spoon
used by whaler's
to ladle off
all that juicy blubber.
Can I have your autograph?
I thought you were awesome
when you were the weather lady.
Mm-hmm.
Perhaps off camera.
Yeah, they'd possibly
be worth more
if they weren't
all country records.
Thank you. Okay,
resetting everyone.
Come forward. Thank you.
And you found this while digging
a post hole on your farm?
[ Chuckles ]
[ Gasps ]
Well, this is a hei tiki.
Sadly, not a pre-colonial one,
I'm afraid.
Locally, they're a dime a dozen.
This one would have been
a nice piece,
but especially being broken,
not worth more than, well,
50 dollars, I imagine.
Come on, Brian.
Don't do this.
Excuse me.
Who is the expert here?
Nope, I'm over it.
There are beliefs that those
who disrespect
Maori Taonga end up
getting sick,
even dying of
a mysterious illness.
Doesn't happen to the seller.
Only the buyer.
- Andie!
- I
[ Chuckles ] Look, come on.
This is all getting
a bit "witchie poo."
Look, what you do with it
is entirely up to you.
Mm?
Finders keepers. Yeah?
Ah, Louise, I'm ready over here.
You still rolling?
That's all we have time for.
Signing off for now
from Brokenwood.
And next week, we'll be looking
for rich pickings
in rustic Riverstone.
See you there.
Goodbye.
Bye.
[♪♪]
No sign of DK?
Or Brian. Late again.
- Qu'elle surprise.
- Typical.
Oh, you really embrace
that special delivery
last night, aye?
This is the sound of me
not talking to you.
Hey, can you go get Brian?
Director, not Nanny.
Andie, please?
I mean, we could just
leave him here.
- [ Chuckles ] That gets my vote.
- Mine too.
- Hey, no crew left behind.
- [ Scoffs ]
Well, it's not
for much longer, is it?
Nothing is in this biz.
[ Engine starts ]
- Hey, he's not there.
- Christ.
Is his room empty?
I knocked three times.
He's probably gone
walkabout again.
Let's just go.
He can get the bus.
Hello? Management.
- Brian?
- Brian?
- No way.
- Oh, my God.
[♪♪]
Morning, team.
Talk to me.
Well, at first glance,
you know,
without an expert opinion,
I would say the victim
Brian Beautemps.
has been garroted.
Tablet, phone, door key,
and victim's wallet
are all still here.
I've seen some freaky things
in my time,
but the French, eh?
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
Spanish.
Hmm?
It's a Spanish invention.
Mm, you sure?
[ Chuckles ] I know my
guillotine from my garrote.
Oh, that's reassuring.
Could you, uh
Oh, yeah. Sorry.
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
Gidday, Brian.
Perhaps all things old aren't
so beautiful after all.
It's a hell of a piece
of furniture you're sitting on.
Not exactly an easy chair,
is it?
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
Hello.
Could you look after
our little friend here, too?
No evidence of a struggle.
Windows are all still up
from the inside.
No sign of forced entry.
Assuming it takes two to tango
with a garrote, the other party
- came through the front door.
- Mm-hmm.
And then they had a couple
of drinks and got on with it.
Round up the rest of this crew.
Boss.
Mike, what a wonderful day.
I'm not sure he feels that way.
Perhaps not.
But in my business,
there are certain cases
we can only hope to work on.
Traditional garroting
has been a lifelong dream.
I'm very excited.
I'm happy for you.
I would like to be left alone.
Mm.
Marcus, you used to run the
Tidal View Lodge, didn't you?
Yeah, I took over this place
hoping for a fresh start.
[ Chuckles ] Now this.
Ah, when you discovered
the victim,
did you move or touch
anything in the room?
No.
And um just to clarify,
an antique garrote chair
is not standard issue
in the King Suite?
No, I've never seen the damn
thing before in my life.
I've got no idea
how it got in there.
And I'd like it out pronto,
please.
The film crew were
your only guests last night.
Yeah, they booked the whole
place out for privacy, I guess.
And Mr. Beautemps is listed
as a single guest,
but you issued two door keys.
Well, that's standard practice.
Um, less chance go guests
having no key
when they roll home
drunk at 1:00 a.m.,
start pounding at my door.
How long are we going
to have to stay?
We have initial inquiries.
Can you give me a timeline?
Well, that's kind of hard to.
My God, what about the network?
Ms. Rice, this will go better
and quicker
if I'm going
to ask the questions.
What about publicity?
Have you thought about that?
ANDIE: No, no,
I didn't hear anything.
I mean, I was in my room
all night.
This is just
so completely crazy.
You didn't hear
anything unusual.
No, I was out to it.
Uh, when was the last time
you saw him?
Well, we had a drink
in the motel garden bar,
and I left around 9:30.
And then you went back
to your room after that?
Yes. Yeah.
Hughes is handling
all the press down the line.
Any queries, refer to media.
Well, this is a bit
of an odd one.
The offender had to smuggle in
an antique execution device
for a start.
Yet, none of the crew
saw anything.
Although one is still M.I.A.,
the sound recordist person,
Gemma Lowe.
No one smuggled anything in.
Gemma?
Hi, I'm Detective Sims.
Uh, DSS Mike Shepherd,
D.C. Breen.
Sorry. DK needed a pie.
One too many bourbons
last night.
Ms. Lowe, what did you mean
by no one smuggled anything in?
The garrote that belonged
to Brian.
As in he travelled with it.
[ Chuckles ] No, he bought it
yesterday here in Brokenwood.
[♪♪]
Brian found it when we were
filming a teaser
at some curio shop.
So what trinkets and treasures
await us at Brokenwood?
Join us tonight
to find out on
BOTH:
"All Things Old and Beautiful."
ANDIE: Cut!
That's everything we need.
Local shop intro, take two.
Okay, relocating
to the saw mill.
Oh, thank God.
Well, well, well.
What do I have here?
A bit of a find that one.
That's 17th century Spanish.
It's authentic.
Please. [ Chuckles ]
It's a knock off.
Admittedly a good one,
but a replica nevertheless.
What would you know?
Clearly more than you.
I have been in this business
for over 35 years.
I think I know
what I'm talking about.
Then bring it on the show.
I'm not going to make a fool of
myself on national television.
I shall tell it like it is.
It's a fake.
Or I could take it
off your hands for
900 dollars?
900 dollars?!
But there's nothing in it
for me.
What did you pay?
250, 300 dollars?
Or did you whip it up
in your man shed?
Look, I'm offering you
a good deal.
Now, I have an interest in
replica instruments of torture,
but not more than
900 dollars worth.
Take it or leave it.
Brian had an eye
for a good deal?
You mean did he like ripping
off unsuspecting mortals?
Sure.
Um, did Mr. Beautemps take
the machine there and then?
No, our van was full of gear.
He was going
to pick it up later.
[♪♪]
We understand that you sold
Mr. Beautemps the garrote?
I did, yes.
And what time did he pick it up?
Well, he took possession of it
around 4:00 p.m. yesterday.
And how did he seem?
Fine, I guess.
But at 4:00 p.m., he would have
been filming his TV show?
Well, like I said, I guess.
It's not that I saw him.
So did someone else
pick it up for him?
No, I delivered it.
All part of the service.
I mean, there was no one
at the motel,
so I left it in place,
spick and span.
Left.
Who let you into his room?
Mr. Beautemps gave me a key.
And what did you do
with that key?
Well, I would have left it
in the room and shut the door
behind me.
You were at the filming
of the TV show.
A little later, yes.
And there was a disagreement
about something
between you and Mr. Beautemps.
I simply want what's mine.
- For goodness' sakes, man!
- Excuse me.
Now is not the time.
After the show.
No, I was merely
asking for payment
after having delivered
the purchase.
During the filming of the show?
Well, I don't like handing
over goods without payment.
After all, possession is 9/10
of the law, isn't it?
Well, thanks for your time,
Sydney.
I mean, legally speaking,
the garrote is still mine.
I mean, payment was never made.
Noted.
Okay, known movements.
Excuse me, Sims?
Oh, Cushla.
No prizes for guessing
why you're here.
"Brokenwood Courier" is
a bastion for public service.
Mm, and a good story.
So what have you got for me?
Um, a suspicious death.
Dead TV celeb.
Seriously, that's it,
and police media
are handling
all the press for this one,
so why don't you go
into the city,
you know, where all
the main journos are based.
Oh, so I'm your local yokel.
Is that it?
Your words, not mine.
This place is going to be
crawling with press any moment.
Talk to media.
Apologies.
Where were we?
Uh, all six of the crew
went back to the motel
after filming around 9:00 p.m.
They'd had dinner in town
at the Porky Pigeon Pizzeria.
I wouldn't describe them
as a cheery bunch.
I was expecting them to be
a little more
rock and roll,
being on the telly.
I should have rushes by now.
I'll do them when we get back.
What is this?
Work to rule?
Does the caprese salad
come with buffalo mozzarella?
Given the scarcity
of buffaloes in Brokenwood,
we use a local cheddar.
Well, I think I'll have
the mighty mo meat lovers.
Thank you.
KRISTIN: Then they had
a nightcap at the motel bar.
Jennifer left first followed
by Brian and Louise,
leaving the others
at the bar.
- Bar's closed fella.
- Well, we'll just, uh,
we'll get something to
take back to the room, yeah?
No, my license
finished at 10:00.
KRISTIN: Uh, DK left the others
not long after.
Uh, I went back to my room
to transfer the rushes.
It takes a while.
Rushes being?
Digital files from the camera
to get to Louise for the editor.
I went back to my room,
jumped online, went to sleep.
I stayed in my room.
I was doing e-mails
until midnight.
I was sharing a movie online
with my partner in the city.
I had to sort some technical
stuff, took a bath.
That was my night.
Given the victim's wallet still
contained credit cards and cash,
robbery seems like
an unlikely motive.
So is his name actually Bottoms?
Beautemps being French
for bottoms?
It's, um, "derriere."
Well, each to their own.
The tech boys are trying
to crack his phone.
But I've been on his blog page.
It seems like he maybe had
some kind of weird fetish.
There's all these images
of him in stocks,
lying under a guillotine,
caressing a gallows.
But most interesting,
at 10:05 p.m.,
he posted this selfie.
Terrible picture,
but check out the caption.
"So excited by my new purchase.
More to follow."
With a suggested price
of 10 grand.
So he was planning a quick flip.
Shameless.
Brian had a disagreement
with the camera guy
over this fella.
[ Gasps ]
Well, this is a hei tiki.
Come on, Brian.
MIKE: And then it ends up
in his room.
SAM: I spoke with the museum.
They can tell by the way
the holes are made
that it's pre-colonial.
MIKE: Brian must
have known that.
Yeah, and that would be
worth thousands.
The museum has registered him
on the heritage database.
He may yet find his way home.
[ Cellphone rings ]
Gina.
Mike, you'll be interested
to know
the victim does not
have unusually long arms.
Okay.
Therefore, he could not have
operated the machine himself.
Thus you can discount suicide.
- I hadn't actually been
- But you can never be sure.
Do you know how
a garrote kills you?
- Painfully?
- One of two ways.
Strangulation
causing asphyxiation
unless the neck breaks first.
- In his case?
- It was the latter.
Pressure, pressure, pressure
[ snaps fingers ] snap.
A further interest, there are no
other signs of physical damage,
no cuts, bruising, contusions,
other than the point of rupture
at the base of his skull.
Which suggests that the victim
assumed the position willingly.
Understandable.
This machine is an instrument
of great wonder.
Time of death
is critical in this one.
For you, Mike, I will,
of course, bend over.
Backwards.
What?
The saying is
"bend over backwards."
Oh, okay.
Interesting.
Best I don't hold you up.
Yeah, it's going to
rate through the roof.
Oh, well, it's just
brought forward
the inevitable, hasn't it?
No, look, I can think of five
other presenters
who can do this job.
Yeah, definitely didn't get put
back into the system.
If a key gets found,
say off the premises,
does it usually get handed in?
No.
Now, people bin them I reckon.
It's bloody expensive for me.
Thanks.
Sorry about that.
Can I help?
Um, yeah, a witness reports
there being some tension
within your crew last night.
What was that about?
Oh, really? Who?
Can't say.
Oh, well,
it's business as usual.
Look, I'm sure in
your line of work,
this is all very normal,
but we're dealing with the loss
of a television icon.
We're upset, and maybe upset
seems like tension.
Well, I was talking about prior
to Mr. Beautemps' death.
Of course.
Well, we travel together,
and maybe it's not as glamorous
as some people might think.
Yeah, noses get out of joint.
We're crammed in a van.
It's long days, cheap motels.
We're tired,
and now we're all bereft.
- So nothing happened last night?
- Nothing.
Oh, although, at the show,
there was this old guy
who was being
a bit of a pain.
No, no, no. You only get one
appearance on the show.
That's the rule.
You don't bloody get it, do you?
Well, he was obsessed
with some old bric-a-brac
of his mother's or something.
We first encountered him
at the Tahuna Point show,
and then he turned up again.
Later, he accosted Brian
in the car park.
BUZZ: This is
her life's work, man.
You diss it, you diss her
and you diss me, you understand?
Is everything all right?
His van was parked here
this morning,
but he left just
before we found Brian.
That's old Buzz.
He was fixing a faulty light
for me last night.
Yeah, I ran into him
at your show, actually.
He said he'd pop by later,
and he did.
I've, um, got his
invoice here somewhere.
Ah.
He's just an old hippie.
You know, he might have smoked
a bit too much
of the devil's lettuce
back in the day,
if you know what I mean,
but, no, he's harmless.
- Mind if I take this?
- Oh, no, no.
Thanks.
Hey, Breen, can you track
down a Buzz McLarty?
Fully Buzzed Electrics.
He was seen
on the premises last night
and had some altercation
with the victim.
Ta.
Yes?
Gemma, hi.
Detective Sims.
I just have a few
follow up questions.
More?
Yeah, if that's okay.
Sorry to interrupt.
Gemma, I need
those data cards now.
Okay.
We have to salvage the episode.
It's the least we can do
for Brian.
Sorry.
So, um, you want me to tell you
what I just told
that other woman?
What other woman is that?
From communications.
She said she was helping police
with inquiries.
Did this woman show I.D.?
Her driver's license, yeah.
- And her name?
- Uh, Cushla someone.
Mm.
Okay, thanks, Gemma.
We'll we can pick this up
some other time.
[♪♪]
I can come back later.
No. All good.
Won't be a minute.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
What's up?
Uh, This was found in
Brian Beautemps' room.
So?
Any idea how it got there?
Probably some late night
dodgy deal out in the car park.
So you knew?
It wasn't unusual. Yeah.
Well, you seemed concerned about
it at the filming of the show.
It wasn't that dude's sell,
and it wasn't Brian's to buy.
That hei tiki, it's
it's got a story.
It would've had a name,
you know,
but, hey, some people
just don't get it.
You left the motel bar
just after 10:00 p.m.
Did you see Brian again
that night?
No.
You did mention a curse.
Call me old fashioned,
but I'd use
"makutu" to be more accurate.
Makutu means curse.
Look, if this were Makutu,
do you think it would involve
a Spanish execution implement
introduced during
the reign of Ferdinand VII?
How was the pizza?
Lost my appetite.
Knock yourself out, though.
[ Ring tone playing ]
Hello.
Buzz McLarty?
I'm not doing any
call outs today.
Not feeling it.
Best you find someone else.
SAM: No, this is D.C. Breen.
Brokenwood CIB.
I need to speak to you
at your earliest convenience.
BUZZ: I'm at the surf beach,
and to be honest,
I'm not planning on leaving.
Fingerprints have thrown up
only two sets on the garrotes.
The victims are all over it
and another set
unknown.
The crank on the machine
is clean of prints?
SAM: Yeah, the offender
must have wiped it down.
Then why not the rest of it?
And the door key that was found
in the room has only his on it.
But the whiskey glasses have
Brian's and another unknown,
different to those
on the garrote.
They could be Sydney Simpson's.
Yeah, possibly,
though he did say
he polished it
when he delivered it, right?
The second door key
is potentially in the hands
of the offender
or it's simply lost.
And we can't discount that
Brian could have simply
let the offender in himself.
Which would suggest
he knew his killer.
And it also suggests
that that door key
is not the one
that Sydney left there.
On it.
Can you be more specific?
Well, I put it down
on the on the table.
Coffee table, side table,
kitchen bench?
- Look, I was in a hurry.
- Well, being in a hurry,
is it possible that you didn't
leave the door key at all?
Look, surely this is
your problem, not mine.
The key must be
in the motel somewhere.
Perhaps you haven't looked
hard enough.
[ Scoffs ]
So you don't still have it?
Well, you're welcome to
take a look for yourself.
Yeah, well, it may come to that.
I'll be in touch.
JENNIFER: Brian was simply
"All Things Old and Beautiful."
In some ways, we were like
brother and sister, really?
[ Siren wails ]
Whoa!
I didn't do anything, did I?
- Not you, Frodo.
- Hey, do you mind?
- We're working here.
- Yeah, well, so am I.
Sorry, is everything all right?
KRISTIN: Yeah, I just need to
have a quick word to Cushla.
- No, no, hey, don't go.
- No, it's fine.
I really ought to be
getting back.
Everyone wants to talk to me.
It's quite overwhelming.
Thanks.
Thank you.
You just cost me
a print exclusive.
Well, that's what happens
when you impersonate
a police officer.
Oh, no, I would never do that.
And I was very clear
about who I was.
Do you have
no ethical boundaries?
My job is to keep
the public informed.
Yeah, well, you want info,
you can get in line down at HQ.
You don't want my help, fine.
But the siren thing,
very uncool.
[♪♪]
SAM: So you were at the motel.
Yep.
Fixing a light for the owner.
When they flicker,
they piss off the guests.
SAM: You see anything unusual?
Define unusual.
Comings and goings,
other people.
It's a motel.
People come and go all the time.
So you saw no one?
I was fixing the light.
The witness has you arguing with
Brian Beautemps in the car park.
You're saying that
didn't happen?
It depends how
you define arguing.
Disagree, accost, lambaste.
Lambaste?
Good word that.
Yeah. Alright.
I lambasted him a bit.
He'd been rude about
my mother's antiques
when I appeared on his show
up in Tahuna Point.
Well, Mum's way past
making the show herself,
so I took them along.
And this Brian joker
had the nerve to say
they had novelty value only.
There's 47, mate!
47 what?
Teaspoons.
One from each town
in New Zealand
dating back
to the early 1950s.
How can I go back
and tell Mum that?
Yeah, I mean,
maybe they did have
It was going to be on the telly.
What was I to say?
"Hey, Mum, your
life's passion"
And it was a passion
"is worth nothing."
Yeah, I can see how that
So I came down here
to have another go.
I thought maybe Beautemps was
having a bad day or something.
They wouldn't even let me on.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
You only get one appearance
on the show.
That's the rule.
So when I saw him,
I let him know how I felt.
You showed me a collection
bigger than that, fella.
Well, I'm sorry,
but they're not antiquities.
Sorry?
There's even one from Taumarunui
and one from the tea rooms
on the Napier Taupo Highway,
which is not even a town.
Well, they're quaint at most.
This is her life's work, man.
You diss it, you diss her,
and you diss me.
You understand?
Is everything all right?
It will be when this joker
gets his bloody act together.
Thanks for that.
BUZZ: We agreed to disagree.
Did you have any contact
with him after that?
No.
You into teaspoons?
Uh, honestly,
not really my thing.
Why does that not surprise me?
Does pizza delivery count?
Some fella in a clown car
delivered pizza.
Uh, how long was he there for?
A couple of minutes.
He left just before
the bloke in the Jag.
[ Engine revs ]
Don't see many of those
around these parts.
And what time was this?
Just before 11:00.
And what did you do after that?
I spoke to Mum, say good night.
Slept in the van, then headed
out here for a late dawnie.
Surf's been pumping all day.
You surf?
Uh, no, not really
my thing either.
Energy of a wave
is like no other.
Different to electricity.
Different form of energy.
One's shocking.
- Yeah. Okay.
- The other is like a
- lifts you up like a
- Cool. Right, thanks Buzz.
love of a good woman.
Boss, Lord Ashbury
drives a Jag, right?
Yeah.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
Sorry, Tony just got a call from
someone in his family back home.
Can I get you both something?
Tea?
We only have Earl Grey
these days.
Uh, we're fine, thanks.
Can I help you with anything?
We need to talk to you both.
Apologies.
MIKE: Everything okay?
My sister has been offered
to buy an old castle
on the Welsh border.
I'm trying to tell her
in the nicest possible way
- that she's barking mad.
- [ Laughs ]
A castle?
That sounds exciting.
TONY: Not when you have
to maintain them.
Absolute money pits.
Anyway, I'm sure you're not here
to talk about my tedious family.
Uh, no, we're here about the
situation with Brian Beautemps.
- Absolutely awful.
- We need to talk to you both.
Of course.
Uh, separately.
If you don't mind.
Well, how very curious.
- Lord Ashbury.
- Oh, please.
I find myself living half way
around the world
away from all that nonsense.
Tony is fine.
Tony, we have a witness
who saw you
Or at least your car
Leaving Brian Beautemps' motel
the night before last.
Did they say what time?
Just before 11:00 p.m.
Well, yes, that'd be correct.
Tony went to visit Mr. Beautemps
to discuss his Vinkelbraun.
It's quite something.
Mr. Beautemps was
clearly impressed.
- Cut.
- Brian, I am the one
- who yells "cut."
- Look, tell your chap to come
to the motel later tonight
when we're away
from the cameras, all right?
All right. Thank you.
Thank you.
Nice to meet you.
TONY: I guess you could say
it was a business meeting.
Did he seem upset
or troubled at all?
Quite the opposite.
He enthused about the painting.
I think he rather fancied
buying it,
but I suspect it was
well out of his reach.
And he was alive and well
when you left?
No question about it.
Huh.
Could I see the Vinkelbraun?
There she is.
"Man with Dog."
Up close, all those
brush strokes.
Ah, well, that
was the breakthrough
the impressionists made,
of course,
with a technique known as
"impasto"
Thick and vivid colors, giving
the canvas actual texture.
MIKE: Can I ask what
it's actually worth?
A lot more than you might think.
Try me?
I've been told between
200,000 and 300,000 pounds.
Interestingly, Mr. Beautemps
concurred with that.
So, uh, he did know a thing
or two after all.
Do you make a habit of traveling
with expensive artwork?
No. Sent for it.
I planned to auction it
for a charity project here.
We're building a school
for orphans in Papua New Guinea.
It's what Tony does
with this time.
He's built three already,
you know?
When you saw Brian,
was there an antique
garrote machine in his room?
TONY: He was actually offering
to sell it to me.
Not my sort of thing at all.
And for the record,
that was not an antique.
No, I believe so.
Brian suggested a swap
for the Vinkelbraun.
[ Chuckles ] Rather cheeky.
Hmm.
Did you share a drink?
Whiskey.
Nothing remarkable.
A mini bar nip. Why?
Oh, I'm just
piecing things together.
And now with us together,
we can build more schools.
It gives our relationship
a focus.
It can't be just sex, sex, sex.
Yeah, uh, no.
Um, Jools,
as a matter of interest,
how did you meet Lord Ashbury?
Well, he's not the sort to
turn up on Tinder, is he?
[ Chuckles ] I guess not.
Tony and I met
at a resort overseas.
I was treating myself
to some time out
after the death
of my previous husband.
- Bonjour, madame.
- Bonjour.
[♪♪]
- [ Laughs ]
- Do you need a hand down there?
Oh.
He'd just finished some
volunteer work,
building houses for
those dispossessed
through rising sea levels.
We got talking.
She dropped her bag, and she
was hovering like a butterfly.
Have you been here before?
No. It's wonderful, isn't it?
Are you going
to happy hour later?
Oh.
I think I will, yes.
Perfect.
I'm Tony.
- Oh, Jools.
- Jools.
JOOLS: Even though
I'd sworn off men
after my last
self obsessed husband,
I couldn't help
but feel drawn to him.
He made me laugh.
[ Laughs ]
Laughter's so important,
isn't it?
There's something about
Kiwi women, I have to say.
You'd know a thing or two,
no doubt.
Oh, mainly about divorce,
I'm afraid.
Oh, no chance of that here.
I plan to propose, you know?
Congratulations.
SAM: A witness placed you
at the motel the other night.
Yeah, I made a delivery
to one of the telly people.
Uh, the Maori joker.
Pizza?
Well, I'm not a hamburger
restaurant, am I?
Around 10:45?
That's pretty late.
With any new business venture,
you got to be prepared
to do the hard yards.
It's weird, though,
since he'd already eaten here
a few hours earlier.
Great pizzas inspire desire.
How did he seem?
Like a man who needed
a good time.
There you go.
One gourmet raised party
pizza special.
That bastard.
Not you.
Things have livened up
a bit then.
My pizzas invoke good times.
Slice?
Uh, no, not right now.
You told my colleague
that the other night you went
to your room and stayed there,
but a witness, has you in
DK Tremaine's room.
Yeah, so?
- Visibly upset.
- I was not upset. I was angry.
- About?
- Personal stuff.
Was it this?
It was found in Brian's room.
That's the one Brian bought.
[♪♪]
It's fine.
It's fine.
[♪♪]
Yeah, Brian was always on
the make because he was famous.
And people are gullible.
If Brian Beautemps says
something's worth 50 dollars
and they're happy
with 50 dollars,
then it's worth 50 dollars.
But then what?
Smuggle it out the country?
Flick it on to your collector
mates in Europe for 2 grand?
More like 15.
That's what I got for that
whalebone Patu last month.
This is so wrong,
and you know it.
It's called the free market,
my friend.
[ Cellphone buzzes ]
Are you going to take that?
Uh, pesky fans.
Time to go and see a man
about a dog.
Good night, all.
SAM: Was that about
the painting?
ANDIE: God knows.
There was always some kind of
dodgy deal going on.
You know, to be honest, I don't
really care about any of this.
I mean, you know, I care,
but not as much as some people.
- Such as DK.
- DK's passionate,
It doesn't make him violent.
So if it wasn't this you were
angry about, what was it?
It's a professionalism thing.
You know, I care about
doing a job right.
Your reputation is everything.
There you are.
What the hell is this?
Sorry?
Uh, can you give us a moment?
- Well
- Look, I know you have a job.
I also have a job.
I have to salvage
a sinking ship.
Please.
I'm done, actually, anyway,
so thank you.
LOUISE: What the hell is this?
Mr. Simpson.
Can I help you?
Well, I was wondering when
I might get my asset back.
It's still unpaid for.
[ Scoffs ] You don't seriously
think anyone will buy that now?
Someone died in it.
Well, there is a certain market
for that kind of thing.
Right, well, you'll be
informed in due course.
Fine. Good day.
Uh, Sydney.
Dropped something.
Sydney Simpson had access
to Brian's room
after he delivered
the garrote.
You mean he kept the door key?
Interview one, his fingerprints
match those on the chair and
Well, what's this from?
Voice mail from
Brian's motel room.
Oh, okay.
You told me
and Detective Shepherd
that on the afternoon
in question,
you left the garrote
in the room,
polished it, and left.
I did, yes.
Spick and span,
all part of the service.
SYDNEY: Yes.
So, why then are your
fingerprints still all over it?
How do you explain that, Sydney?
Well, I may have gone back.
May or did?
I may have gone in.
[♪♪]
Alright, alright, I
I considered repossessing it.
God, it's a damned
awkward thing.
So I left him
several messages instead.
Not that he replied.
And what did these messages say?
Well, they were about
making payment
at his earliest
convenience, et cetera.
Might the et cetera
be more like,
"Pay up, you pompous bastard.
I know you're leaving
town first thing.
I know your type,
I will publicly shame you."?
That was at 9:45.
We have access to
the voice mail in Brian's room.
And how did you plan
to publicly shame him, Sydney?
SYDNEY: Please, look, I was
I was emotional and frustrated.
That's all.
You know, to a man like
Brian Beautemps, money's cheap,
but to me, 900 dollars is a lot.
He'd already ignored my call
to his mobile.
I rang the room.
There was no answer.
I I left that message.
But not his room key
on the table, as you said.
Technically speaking,
that's a porky, Sydney.
I should have admitted that,
but he died.
I could have been incriminated.
Do you recognize this number?
Well, that's my shop number.
So you called Brian again
at 11:01 p.m.
He ignored that, as well.
Possibly because
he was already dead.
- Well, I didn't know that.
- Didn't you?
Well, if I did,
I wouldn't have bothered.
We need to be sure about that.
Just wait a minute.
Um, thank you
for your time, Sydney.
[♪♪]
No one saw Brian leave his room.
The motel phone logs show
that he ignored
a land line call from Sydney.
Which would have come up
as a "no caller" I.D.
He could have been sleeping.
But we know Lord Ashbury
left at 10:50 p.m.,
as witnessed by Buzz McLarty.
He would have to have
fallen asleep very quickly.
Unlikely.
Or maybe Lord Ashbury
was simply the last person
to see him alive, and therefore
the person who killed him.
Should we take a team out
and bring him in?
No, best we keep it casual.
[♪♪]
Detective, another lovely day.
TONY: Well, you've caught us
fresh from our architects.
First sketches
for the new school.
- So exciting.
- Would you care to see them?
Uh, perhaps another time.
Tony, following new inquiries,
I need you to come down
to the station
for some further questions.
New inquiries?
I don't understand.
Well, best we go through them
at the station.
No.
There must be some mistake.
Well, they're just questions
at this stage.
Now?
Yeah.
Now would be most helpful.
JOOLS: Detective, this is
completely unnecessary.
Well, if it is,
then no harm done.
It's all right, darling.
It's obviously just
a misunderstanding.
Oh.
But if you know a good lawyer
[♪♪]
Word gets around ♪
Travels all the way ♪
Turns up at your door ♪
It just blows right in ♪
No way.
Down a river ♪
With a lovable fake ♪
Lord Ashbury.
Cheaper than cheap wine ♪
All the best, mate.
Was that a set up?
MIKE: No.
- A bloody ambush.
- It's a public place.
Don't worry about Cushla.
"Brokenwood Courier."
Tomorrow's fish and chip
paper at best.
Dennis Buchanan,
barrister, solicitor,
and, well, I'm an
occasional miracle worker.
- Anthony Ashbury.
- Oh, I know. I know.
Let's not forget about the Lord.
- Earl, actually.
- Oh, even better!
Jools Fahey and I go way back.
So anything to help
a friend in need.
And of course, the monarchy
in a time of crisis.
[ Clears throat ]
Shall we?
DENNIS: As you both know,
I've only had a brief time
to consult with
my esteemed client,
but he wants to make it
very clear of his movements
on the night in question.
Yes, he did visit Mr. Beautemps
approximately 10:30 p.m.
And they discussed the value
of his painting by
Jan Vinkelbraun.
Quite.
He then headed home.
- At speed.
- What?
A witness describes you
leaving in haste.
Wouldn't you if you had
the lovely Jools Fahey
waiting at home for you?
Context is important.
Jools Fahey recalls
you arriving home 11:35 p.m.,
yet you were driving fast.
Yes.
How do you account for the time
between leaving the motel
and arriving home?
A drive that would have taken
10 minutes at most.
I stopped for a pint
at the, uh, Snake and Tiger.
At what time?
Around closing.
I spoke with a charming barmaid.
Trudes.
No doubt that fine, upstanding
citizen, Trudy Nielsen.
Perhaps you gentlemen
would like to take some time
to corroborate
my client's alibi.
[♪♪]
Yeah, I remember
the Lord coming in.
And it was right on closing?
Is this about the terms
of my parole?
No.
I didn't contravene
the liquor license.
SAM: I'm not saying you did.
I have special exemption to work
here for my brother, Ray.
I'm not about to screw that up
for him or me.
I'm building a very specific
timeline, that's all.
TRUDY: I'd just
called last drinks.
I cut his lordship some slack.
He looked like he needed it.
A pint of bitter, please.
With that accent, would you
like it warmed up a bit?
As it comes.
Thank you.
TRUDY: You're cutting it fine.
Any drink that's ordered
before 11:00 can be finished.
I sent him out the door
about 11:30.
He was the last to leave.
- Did you talk to him again?
- No.
He looked like a man
who wanted to drink in peace.
Boss, assuming we take the word
of Trudy Nielsen,
Lord Ashbury's story stacks up.
He arrived two minutes
before closing.
Okay.
Time the drive from the motel
to the Snake and Tiger.
Yeah, got it.
Trudy Nielsen has
verified your story.
There you go.
I remain interested in the time
that you spent
with Brian Beautemps.
TONY: As I said,
we talked about art.
What more can I say?
Well, at this stage, you're the
last person to see him alive.
Perhaps I was.
DENNIS: Detective Shepherd,
unless you have
any further questions
for his lordship,
we might as well retire to
a more comfortable establishment
and a G&T.
Or a Pimm's.
[♪♪]
Sims?
Gemma?
Um, I have
some information.
- Yes?
- A recording.
Okay, you recorded what exactly?
It's illegal to record people
without their consent,
but I made it accidentally.
What the hell is this?
There is nothing of
the day's shoot on here.
- What?
- It's just a bunch of
toilets flushing, traffic noise,
someone running a bath.
Oh, no way.
I admit, I was
I was pretty wasted.
Boom!
[ Laughter ]
DK: Hang on.
Are we are we on?
I got to go. I got to go.
I got to go sort my rushes.
When I was transferring the
data, I must have pushed record.
It wasn't a deliberate act.
I just pushed the wrong button
and forgot about it.
I couldn't believe what I'd done
until I listened back to it.
What did you hear?
The microphone was facing
Brian's room,
and he had a visitor.
Sorry, so you heard Brian
with someone, and it's recorded?
It's the final minute you'll be
most interested in, I think.
[ Muffled, indistinct talking ]
BRIAN: It's all a fake!
[ Muffled, indistinct talking ]
TONY: You don't know what
the hell you're talking about.
[ Thud ]
Got your number, Mr. Ashbury.
[ Car engine starting ]
[ Engine revs ]
- Is that?
- Ssh!
There's more.
[ Knocking ]
[ Door opens ]
BRIAN: Well, well
[ Beeping ]
Why did it stop?
Uh, the battery died.
You mean?
It finished recording.
That's all there is.
Does the data card
have a time code?
Thanks, Gemma.
That's very helpful.
We can now place you
in Brian's room between
10:30 and 10:51 p.m.
I'd already told you that.
Please, detectives, this is not
new evidence of anything.
At 10:50,
you were heard arguing.
You didn't mention that.
- Heard by who?
- A witness.
Are they reliable?
It was recorded digitally.
We've heard you arguing and then
leaving the room at 10:51.
And then seen by another
witness driving off at speed.
You then arrived at
the Snake and Tiger
in an anxious state.
Brian reaffirmed the value
of your painting, correct?
- Yes.
- Ah.
So why were you anxious?
I don't recall being anxious.
BRIAN: It's all a fake!
TONY: You don't know what
the hell you're talking about.
[ Thud ]
There's a gap between
you leaving
and a knock on Brian's door.
Was that you?
A knock? No.
It's time enough to leave
and double back.
- It wasn't me.
- It wasn't him.
Mr. Buchanan, please.
I can speak for myself.
Is that wise?
It is when you're telling
the truth.
I left.
And I did not return.
[ Knocks ]
Boss.
Tech boys finally cracked
Brian's phone and found these,
the last four photos
taken at 10:55 p.m.
KRISTIN: And given
his arms are bound,
they're not selfies, are they?
SAM: No, there's
definitely someone else
in the room with him.
How long's the drive between the
motel and the Snake and Tiger?
Seven and a half minutes
at pace.
Lord Ashbury arrived at 10:58.
So whoever was behind the camera
was the last person
to see Brian alive.
And the first person
to see him dead
because six minutes later,
he wasn't answering
his motel phone.
But as far as Lord Ashbury goes.
He didn't take the photos.
So he's not our man.
Well, Detective, barking up
the wrong tree's
nothing to be ashamed of,
said the rabid dog
to the bishop.
An occupational hazard,
no doubt.
Thank you for
your understanding.
No hard feelings.
Oh, thank God.
What would I do without you?
Oh, now, now.
It was all a silly
misunderstanding.
[♪♪]
I shall expect
a printed apology.
Nothing less.
[ Scoffs ]
Said the actress
to the bishop.
JOOLS: I have to admit,
I'm disappointed in this fiasco,
Detective Shepherd.
I'm sorry,
but that's how I feel.
What's the difference
between an Earl and a Lord?
Not a lot.
Tony is
the 14th Earl of Ashbury.
What people here don't quite
understand is that
Earl, Lord, Viscount
they're all much the same.
Not that I care about titles.
It's the man within that counts,
and he is quite something else.
When Brian opened the door,
he said, "Well, well,"
which strongly suggests
he knew the person.
So who did he know?
Gemma Lowe?
She and Andie Powell were
drinking in DK's room.
Gemma left first.
You're not going to stick around
for Gourmet Ray's party pizza?
No, no, I've drunk enough.
Honestly.
Returning to her room,
took a bath,
which can be heard
on her inadvertent recording.
Then Andie left, which means
That for DK being in his room
at time of death,
we only have
his word for it.
Louise Rice?
She was working in her room.
I checked the times
of her e-mails.
You write a lot of e-mails.
I'm a producer.
That's what we do.
What's Brian's Antiques Show?
Confidential.
Brian was developing
a new program.
Sadly, that show
won't happen now.
We're you all going
to work on it?
Some of us.
I had to let DK go.
Too much friction
between him and Brian.
Andie
Well, Brian felt the new show
needed more of
a male director's touch.
Right, I'll leave you to it.
Jennifer Furrows.
She was having a video chat
with her boyfriend, Glenn Tyson.
Would it be possible to see
the log for the call
that you made to your partner
on the night in question?
Seriously?
Yeah, just dotting
my I's and
What my partner and I
do online is private.
Yes, well, um, it's a voluntary
request, but it will help.
JENNIFER: Fine.
There.
58 minutes.
Wow, that's a lot to talk about.
Touring is hard.
My partner and I watch movies
together over Vid-Connect.
It's almost like being together
on the couch.
Right.
And, um, what was the movie?
Uh, "Brain Dead."
It's a zombie thing.
It's it's a little excessive,
but, you know,
it's one of Glenn's favorites.
Pretty hard to watch a movie
and videotape boyfriend
while turning the crank
on a garrote.
Brian also knew Lord Ashbury.
No, leave it up there.
Something still doesn't add up.
He also knew Sydney Simpson.
Well, he was running around
leaving abusive messages.
There's no way he could have
taken these photos
and then made it back
to his store
to make that final call
at 11:01.
Copies of the victim's
bank records.
No withdrawals since he died,
and nothing particularly unusual
to suggest bad debts.
Thanks.
Sims, head into the city
and get a formal statement from
Glenn Tyson, to be sure.
And, Breen, your Sparky
was on the premises, too.
Yes. Yes, boss.
Hey, what's this large number
that repeats?
Um, that's his pay packet.
Seriously?
It's more than I
I'm in the wrong business.
Buzz, DC Breen.
How's the surf?
Primo.
We need a formal statement of
your movements the other night.
Hunkered down all night
till I came out here
for the point break.
SAM: With no one
to corroborate that.
I was talking to my mum
for a good half hour
before I fell asleep.
Right.
Uh, can I grab her number?
She's with me here at the beach
if you want to come out
and have a word.
Okay, will do.
[♪♪]
Yeah, Jen and I
were on Vid-Connect.
I told you that.
I just need a few more details,
if that's okay.
Yeah.
I understand it was
one continuous call.
Or did you make a series
of calls that night?
Uh, no. Yeah.
It was just the one call.
We do it most nights
when Jen's on the road.
It's a good way to connect and,
you know, to have a bit of um
fun.
Hey.
You look beautiful tonight.
[ Laughs ] Oh, darling, thanks.
Oh, I miss you.
Yeah.
- Anything else, anything?
- No, I Come on.
Do I have to, um
You know, because things
can get kind of personal.
Sure. Um, I just need to sight
your call log.
Yeah.
Um, anything you need.
58 minutes.
That's a lot of personal time.
Yeah, yeah, we often watch
a movie together.
That's romantic.
I guess.
And what was the movie?
"Brain Dead."
Yeah, it's a zombie classic.
Okay, good, thanks.
Well, technically,
it is a romantic comedy,
just with some gore
and a lot of splatter.
Yeah. It's, uh
it's probably not really
my thing.
Well, don't knock it
till you've tried it.
[♪♪]
BUZZ: Bit of a snoop, are you?
I was under the impression
your mum was with you.
Yeah, always.
Mum, this is
Detective Constable Breen.
Wants to have a word.
BUZZ: I lost her once.
I'm not losing here again.
Aren't these incredible?
Truly a collection.
So, Buzz, after you got
into the van, you spoke to
her.
Like I do every night.
Sorry I didn't do better
with it all, Mum.
I will keep trying, I promise.
You might not understand this,
but I have a deep passion
within me to see
her dream through.
47 unique towns
represented here,
and these bloody telly people
dismissed it as a joke.
Heartbreaking, if I'm honest.
Could that heartbreak have
manifested itself in anger?
What?
Did you visit Brian's room?
No way.
Sure about that?
When your mother dies, you have
to live a blameless life, mate,
knowing she's watching
your every move.
Some people have God
as their witness.
I have my mother.
KRISTIN: How did you feel about
Brian starting another show?
"Brian's Antique Show"?
And how did you know about that?
It's our job to know things.
KRISTIN: Is that
why you were angry?
Because you got fired?
Well, yeah, yeah, I was miffed
that Brian didn't have the guts
to tell us himself.
Instead he got ice queen Louise
to do it for him.
Come on! He is the one
who refused to film!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Thanks for the solidarity.
She's the director.
It is her job
to get it in the can.
-Yeah
-This should come
as no surprise.
Brian doesn't want either
of you on his new show.
When I last saw Brian,
he was alive and well.
KRISTIN: At what time was this?
ANDIE: I don't know.
Um, just before 11:00.
Hard to tell. I was
I was a bit pissy eyed
and pissed off in general.
Thanks.
We'll let you know
when you're clear to leave town.
There were no other guests
staying in the motel
that night, correct?
None.
Marcus Donovan said they booked
the whole place out for privacy.
Why?
When Brian was found,
he wasn't wearing a bathrobe.
Detective, can I interest you
in a ticket?
Only 10 bucks.
Um, I'll pass. Thanks.
You don't know what
you're missing out on.
Wise choice. Word is it's
Doug Randall's severed head.
[♪♪]
SAM: The night Brian died,
he searched Lord Ashbury,
Vinkelbraun,
and recent hei tiki sales
on a French auction house.
Ruthless.
What do you know
about this Vinkelbraun?
Didn't you study art history?
Uh, psychology.
But some would say
they are inextricably linked.
But Google says
"a 19th century contemporary
of George Breitner."
By the looks of it,
he was an impressionist.
Died young, 32, of syphilis.
Very de rigueur.
And by the looks of it,
he's generally considered
second rate to the more
famous painters of the period.
Are you thinking it was stolen?
That's a possibility.
SAM: Stolen art work's
pretty hard to flog these days.
Unless the intention
wasn't to actually sell it.
Still cheering the local
wine society, I see.
Yeah, and I'm retiring soon,
so I'm planning
to get into judging.
Yes, Lord Ashbury tried to
borrow against this painting.
But you didn't.
Charity work in Papua New Guinea
is without doubt a noble cause.
Thank you, Bernie.
And as intriguing
as the painting is,
I just don't have the latitude
to lend against it.
It's a Vinkelbraun.
I understand that.
Brian Beautemps has put
a conservative estimate
of half a million
New Zealand dollars on it.
I thought you were gonna
auction it.
TONY: Planned to, but with
all this Beautemps business,
it all feels
rather distasteful.
It might seem we were
exposing his demise.
I'm sorry, love.
It's not the result
I was expecting.
We could look at this
another way.
My house could be collateral.
TONY: Absolutely not.
No, we simply wait for the dust
to settle and auction it later.
Six months.
Or perhaps 12.
JOOLS: Those children in
Papua New Guinea
can't wait another year.
No, there's no way you need
to be doing that.
But she did anyway.
Yes.
Of course Lord Ashbury
could have always
sold his Jag instead.
Not his to sell.
Mrs. Fahey leased it for him.
Aristocrats, eh?
Asset rich, cash poor.
And he is quite something else.
Huh.
From memory, you claim to be
the 14th Earl of Ashbury,
yet people call you Lord?
Earl. Viscount.
People opt for
the easier option Lord.
It doesn't bother me.
But yes, technically,
I'm Earl Anthony Ashbury.
Technically you are.
And that's what you rely on,
isn't it?
Sorry?
Ignorance, confusion.
It's a curious thing how a name
like Earl can be a title, too.
You see, I've been wrestling
with why Brian used the phrase
"It's all a fake."
I mean, given he was trying
to sell you the garrote,
why would he point out
it was a fake?
He knew I was on to him.
Or was he on to you?
The Vinkelbraun?
Is that the fake?
It's an original.
Or is it's "all a fake"
referring to
everything about you?
Good God, man.
Well, it would explain
your angry departure,
the urgent need
for a late night drink.
I mean, what were you thinking?
That the game was up?
But the next morning,
a stroke of luck,
Brian Beautemps is found dead.
Your secret is safe.
So you exploited the opportunity
to approach the bank
playing the passionate
philanthropist,
a process through which Jools
chooses to mortgage her house
to generate cash
for a charity in your name.
Am I close?
You're right.
About one thing.
Brian was accusatory.
You're no more a Lord
than I'm an astronaut.
The name, the painting,
it's all a fake.
But my silence can be bought.
TONY: It was
a blackmail proposition.
Those were the accusations,
which, of course, are not true,
as my passport clearly states.
Take it away.
Check it out if you must.
I'll do that.
And if the Vinkelbraun
is a forgery,
you'll be facing charges.
I guarantee it is not a forgery.
Or stolen.
It's not stolen.
I need you to stay
in the district
while things get sorted.
Jools is a marvellous woman.
Why would I leave?
And there she is now.
I assure you, the Vinkelbraun
is an original.
As is my passport.
I hope so.
Oh, if you do have something
to say to Jools,
do it now,
for her sake at least.
[♪♪]
KRISTIN: So we now know
Andie Powell was the last to see
Brian alive, entering
his room at 11:00 p.m.
SAM: Yet Brian wasn't wearing
the robe when found,
and none of the remaining
suspects fit the description.
A gray haired gentleman.
What about Buzz McLarty?
He was in his van at the time.
And something tells me
he's not a robe guy.
Probably sleeps in the nude.
Mm. So are we looking
for a phantom guest?
Ray Neilson was
in the vicinity.
Pay him a visit and ask him
about his special offer, too.
I never went back to the motel.
I was lucky to get out
of there alive.
Jesus Christ!
Three wheels, good, four wheels
better, if you know what I mean.
If I was to spend 100 dollars
on the party pizza special,
how many pizzas would I get?
That's an even hundy
for the pizza.
One pizza with two free sides.
No harm in that.
Look, it's a service designed
for the tourists
who find themselves
caught short.
We don't want them leaving town
saying this place is a downer.
Take it easy, Ray.
We just have a couple
of further questions.
Well, I hope
this is the last of them.
I am desperate to get home
to see my Glenn,
and we all really need to put
this awful business behind us.
Here you go.
Black, white,
and almond flat white.
Thank you, Frodo.
Yeah, I don't want to be rude,
but I was kind of still
hoping for that selfie.
- Well
- When I was a kid,
you were the weather lady on TV,
and you were totally awesome.
So you said.
I swear, it never rained
when I was a kid.
Not when you did the weather.
You are too kind.
Come on then.
Would you?
Pleasure.
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
It's good.
FRODO: So awesome!
Thanks.
You're welcome.
I mean, some people reckon
you're washed up, but not me.
No way. You're great,
especially on the weather.
Thanks.
Fans got to love them.
So you'll no doubt be looking
for a new presenting role
once all this settles down.
JENNIFER: Oh, maybe not.
I mean, the show's
what the audience loved.
Brian and I were
merely wallpaper.
No, I'm sure the show
will go on,
and Brian will be replaced
by someone younger.
As they would have when he left
to start his new project,
uh, "Brian's Antique Show."
Indeed.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
Sorry, you just having
a bit of "me" time.
Why did he sit in there and
let someone do what they did?
No one heard him scream, and
there's no signs of a struggle.
Did he have a death wish?
Uh, seems like he was into
a bit of torture,
maybe a B&D act gone wrong.
Ashbury's passport checks out.
Hm. Okay, thanks.
Oh, hi, Gina.
Good evening, Mike.
Gina.
I have toxicology reports.
- Alcohol?
- Yes, but not so much.
Anything else?
Yes, I have time of death.
I think we might be
ahead of you for once.
Between 10:55 and 11:01 p.m.
There is no way
you can be that exact.
Uh, we have some
forensic evidence.
Well, I'll, uh,
leave you both to it.
I had it down as between
10:00 and 12:00 p.m.
Mike, I have let you down.
Not at all.
How long will it have taken
Beautemps to die?
On that, I can be very precise.
Please sit,
and I will demonstrate.
I'd rather not.
What about Kristin?
I think she's busy.
Shame.
As the screw presses
into the base of the neck,
which is rigid
against the leather belt,
the air supply is cut off
or the neck is broken.
Both can occur within a minute,
depending on the speed
the crank is turned.
And how fast depends
on the mood.
The Spanish are
a very moody people.
And with alcohol in his system,
he could have been caught
off guard.
Yes, he could have been jolly,
then not jolly at all.
Speaking of mood, I would like
to take this opportunity
to offer you something
very personal.
My Russian yak horn.
I know you work hard,
and this has many,
many health benefits
besides libido,
which I'm sure you have
no problems with at all.
Please, Mike, my gift to you.
Sorry, Mike, uh, Louise Rice
is at the front desk.
Hold that thought, Gina.
Of course. Duty calls.
I thought you were busy.
I just wanted to let you know
that I'll be moving
the crew on tomorrow,
unless you have
any more questions.
Uh, no, you've been
very helpful. Thank you.
Tell me, will you stay
with Jennifer Furrows then on
"All Things Old and Beautiful"?
Uh, no, there won't be a show.
Well, she thought
you might recast.
Without Brian?
He was the show.
Will she take over
the new program then?
What, are you her agent now?
Oh, no, I'm just assuming these
shows must go on somehow.
Well, when
"All Things Old and Beautiful"
started, Brian was
the antiquities expert.
Jennifer was the presenter.
She would throw to him,
"So, Brian, what can you tell me
about the 18th century
Devonshire tea sets?"
And he would wax lyrical,
and the audience loved him.
Very quickly he became
Jennifer's equal
and so much more.
In the end,
she was just a passenger.
The world can be a lonely place
for ex-weather girls.
Goodbye, Detective.
KRISTIN: Hey, Mike.
In these three photos,
the background is the same,
but in the fourth,
you can see a shape here.
What is that?
Is that a heater?
SAM: Open lid of a laptop.
And we know from the crime scene
that Brian never had a laptop,
only a tablet.
That laptop had to belong
to the offender.
Hi, Glenn. I just have
a few further questions.
I need to lodge
a missing person report.
For?
My Tony, Lord Ashbury,
of course.
Please come through
to my office.
Obviously, he's been kidnapped.
Let's not rush
to any conclusions.
Why else would he
just disappear?
How long has he been gone?
Almost 24 hours.
It's completely unlike him.
You called Tony "Lord Ashbury."
That's his name.
MIKE: Uh
[ Telephone rings ]
Mike Shepherd.
TONY: I really am awfully sorry
about all this old chap.
Where are you?
Oh, well, let's just say
somewhere warm and far
from the jurisdiction
of New Zealand law.
With things like passports,
it's always good to have
a spare or two.
[ Chuckles ]
And if Jools doesn't want it,
you are welcome
to keep the Vinkelbraun.
Served it's purpose.
I'm moving on to Delandez.
An obscure
contemporary of Picasso.
TONY: [ Chuckles ]
Well done, Detective.
The Internet can be so helpful
when one wants to create
art history, biography,
whatever you like.
Could you say goodbye
to Jools for me?
I really did love her.
It would be more honorable
coming from you.
As a matter of fact,
she's sitting right
in front of me, very worried.
TONY: You know women, Detective.
Always best to
let them down gently.
Adieu.
Good news?
[ Cellphone rings ]
Sims.
Jennifer Furrows' boyfriend
said the connection was weak.
So it was one continuous call,
but most of it was audio only.
Bring him in for an interview.
Okay.
Indeed, that was Tony
Lord Ashbury.
Oh.
He's
Come on, mate, we're leaving.
It is completely
unreasonable for you
to ask us to stay any longer.
I understand. You're free to go,
except Miss Furrows.
I need clarification
on something
I'm still in the dark on.
[♪♪]
You started your video call at
10:03 p.m.
Yeah, after we'd had some fun,
we watched a movie together.
[ Growling on TV ]
[ Screaming ]
This bit is crazy.
But seriously, if you're faced
with a zombie,
that's the way you want
to deal with it.
I'm having trouble seeing you.
Jen asked if we could
go audio only.
I mean, it often happens when
she's touring The Boondocks.
Of course, your mind wasn't so
much on the movie, was it?
[ Growling on TV ]
I'll turn my camera off.
At least then,
I can hear you, darling.
Could you take off
your wig please?
- Uh
- It's important.
I need to insist.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
[ Sighs ]
[♪♪]
You had bigger issues to deal
with than a movie, didn't you?
I did.
You need to know Brian was the
most ungenerous man I ever met.
I couldn't believe he had
the temerity to leave the show.
I mean, where was
I supposed to go?
I need to use a lady's, hon.
Shall I spare you the details?
Oh, yeah, go on.
I don't need to hear that.
Stand by, caller.
Oh, don't do it.
Don't do it.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
Well, well, well.
[♪♪]
Well, this is a new look,
you dark horse.
I didn't know
you were going this way.
Maybe it's an old look.
There is so much you
don't know about me, Brian.
Qu'est-ce que c'est?
I thought we could write
a statement together,
you know, about
your leaving the show.
Look, it's about
professional growth.
You understand?
Nothing personal.
Huh.
Have you posted
on your blog yet?
Uh, just one.
I need better angles.
Could you, um
Of course.
Right. [ Chuckles ]
Um
Oh, now why don't we
strap you in?
Make it look like the real deal?
- Why not? Okay.
- Hmm? Yeah.
There you go.
- Yes.
- Yep.
[ Chuckles ]
Now, does this go around here?
Yeah, around the elbows.
Right.
Nice and tight? Yeah?
- [ Groans ]
- [ Laughs ]
That's so tight.
Exciting.
Right, there we go.
- Okay.
- Right.
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
Should I smile?
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
JENNIFER: Yeah.
Big smile. Hmm.
There you go.
Well, I look very handsome,
I must say.
There's something about
being relaxed
in the executioner's chair
that makes you
quite alluring.
So go on.
Undo me.
Oh, that's better, darling.
Oh, good, you're back
for the gory bit.
- Party's over.
- [ Laughs ] That's great.
[ Screaming on TV ]
[ Motor whirring ]
Ohh.
[ Laughs ]
Steady on!
Oh!
The movie's is pretty gruesome
in places,
but like I said,
it's just a bit of fun.
[ Grunts ]
Oh!
See, that's over the top.
[ Gasps ]
[ Laughs ]
[ Grunts ]
[ Glenn laughs ]
That was good. Yeah.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
[ Screams ]
[ Sighs ]
I've been thinking maybe
it's time for us to get a puppy.
A puppy?
Yeah, yeah, I'd be up for that.
[ Computer chimes ]
Hey.
God, so tired.
Night, night, darling.
See you soon.
Oh, okay. Um, good night.
[ Growling on TV ]
That term
"out of body experience,"
I know what that means now.
It's like I had the thought,
and then I was doing it.
It's like it was done before
I'd even finished the thought.
When exactly did you find out
about Brian's plan?
What take is it?
Oh, God, eight, nine.
I've lost count.
You should know I'm leaving.
I've lined up something new
with the network.
Bigger fish to fry.
I've called it
"Brian's Antiques Show."
ANDIE: And action!
JENNIFER: So join me,
Jennifer Farrows.
BRIAN: And moi, Brian Beautemps,
at this week's venue,
the quaint and curious
historic sawmill.
Here in beautiful,
bucolic Brokenwood.
A place we're sure is home to
BOTH: All things old
and beautiful.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
Truce.
So why the change of heart?
Well, my boss found
your front page scoop useful.
Huh.
Turns out Earl Anthony Ashbury
is literally just Earl,
some art school dropout scamming
his way across the globe.
TRUDY: Okay,
listen again, everybody.
The winner of
the mystery box raffle is
number 87, Kristin Sims.
[ Applause ]Wait, what?
I didn't buy a ticket.
CUSHLA: I did.
For you. A peace offering.
Wow.
I don't know what to say.
How about "thanks"?
Aren't you going to open it?
[ Chuckles ] Yeah, can't wait.
Oh.
Okay.
It's my great grandmother's
doll collection.
What use have I got of it?
Still, it's worth 700 dollars
for children with
disabilities, so
Aren't they cute?
Mmm. Mm-hmm.
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
[♪♪]
[♪♪]