Childrens Hospital (2010) s07e03 Episode Script
Sy's Tenure
- 07x03 - "Sy's Tenure" Ah, ah, ah, ah Keep on dancing Sy, congratulations on tenure! Thank you.
Thank you.
I'm so proud of me.
Hey, hey, hey.
What? What is tenure, exactly? I mean, is it like debt consolidation? - 'cause that was a lifesaver.
- No.
It means he can't get fired, no matter what he does.
He's bulletproof.
Oh, we'll see about that.
No, metaphorically, Chet.
Hey, what is metaphorically, exactly? I mean, is it like debt consolidation? 'cause that was a lifesaver.
Hey, Deejay.
I see you got a new mixer.
Owen, thank God, man.
I got to pee like a monitor dragon.
Oh, no, no, no.
This looks too complicated for me.
Being the deejay is easy.
Just don't touch my bubble machine app, okay? It's my closer.
Thanks, bro! Yeah! Yeah! Uh-huh! Whoo! Yeah, if you like that, how about this? That's it! This is amazing! Wow! And lights! Whoo! You know? Yeah.
Yeah, here we go! How about some bubbles?! Partying! With bubbles! Hey, bro! Bro! What are you doing?! That's my closer! Hey, I'm back, everybody! But I'm the deejay! DJ Déjeuner! Hey, hospital deejay is the last pure democracy on earth.
The people have spoken! (chanting "Owen") Here we go.
I don't mind, bro.
I'll take over for you.
Yeah, take over for him! I'll take over, right? We want more Owen! Whoo! Could somebody help me get down from here? It took two people to get me up here, so Hey, hell of a party last night, Sy.
So, now that you have tenure, what're you gonna do? I'm going to do what anybody in my position would do.
Please say what I hope you're gonna say.
I'm going to design the world's first consumer jetpack.
Yeah! That was totally it! That is exactly what I wanted you -- Whoa.
Okay.
Now, I hope you say You're gonna help me! Yes! That was it again! We are totally in sync -- on the same page! Right.
Hello? Hello! Can anybody hear me?! That's okay.
I'll just I'll just get down myse-- Oh! Ooh! Oh, my God.
Attention, staff.
Last night, an M.
D.
saved my life.
That is all.
So what's your deejay name gonna be? Well, I've thought a lot about that, and I think I'm gonna go with DJ Owen! - DJ Owen, huh? - Yep.
- Okay, I think I get it? - Yeah? I mean -- Oh, wait.
Okay.
Ew! I get it now! You're sick! - It's good, right? - Yeah.
Hey.
Hey, bro.
Are we cool? Owen, being the hospital deejay was my whole life.
Yeah, yeah.
I get it.
Now I'm just a doctor that makes a lot of money who has a great investment guy that makes him a lot of money.
Yeah, yeah.
I totally get it.
I mean, I guess I could use this time to explore new things.
Yeah, I totally get that! So are we cool? Yeah.
Yeah.
We're cool.
Cool! That's great news, 'cause this has always been a dream of mine, dude, I'm telling you.
Man, I wish my dad were alive to see me now.
Your dad wanted you to be a hospital deejay? No.
I just miss him so damn much.
Oh.
Yes, we've been told that the jetpack is way in the future.
Well, today is our future! - Yeah! - Lola, I need you in room six.
Wait, Cat! Sy's talking about jetpacks, Cat! Jetpacks! I know, I know, but I actually really need you-- Shhhhh! Hey, Cat, I am so happy that you're here, because you and Lola, you can be our R&D team.
Congratulations.
- Room 6 needs help.
- Oh, room six can wait.
- The jetpack has waited long enough.
- Right.
- Room 6 actually can't wait because -- - Tenure.
- Okay, but we're so understaffed -- - Tenure.
- But Owen's been deejaying so much -- - Tenure! What's happening here? It's the future.
Of course you've got some kids to tend to, But who's gonna tend to them when they are jetpack-age? Do not be so selfish.
Oh, Cat.
Tenure! There's got to be someone out there.
There's got to be.
Oh! Hey! Over here! Just got to get down from the Over here! Help me.
Hey! Hey! No! No! Don't leave me! Don't leave me, Fernando! Oh, Blake, Blake.
Hey, I didn't realize the hospital rents out the basement.
I've done two bat mitzvahs already today.
When did you learn French? I got time for a lot of things now, man.
It's great.
Oh, by the way, did you know that "DJ Déjeuner" means "DJ Lunch?" So stupid.
Why didn't somebody tell me that? No, another bat mitzvah! Au revoir ! If you come to find out who you are May you find out, may you find out who you are All right.
Any headway here, gals? Attention, staff.
All available doctors report to the E.
R.
Code blue.
And if you come to search for what is lost May you find it, may you find it at any cost Oh! Oh, no! Oh! I'm so sorry! I was watching yoga.
And if you come over from far All right.
Here you go.
Oh, that's probably gonna melt.
All alone down there, my little friend? Well, too bad for you.
Steady now.
No! So hungry.
So weak.
Chief, we're here to save you! We have a fondue and taco bar set up just for you! I'm saved! No! No! Ah, damn it! Chartreuse isn't working, either.
Here.
Can I go now? - What's this? - It's plans for a working jetpack.
I figured it was the only way we could get back to work.
Cat, you've discovered a more efficient fuel that is gonna increase flying times by orders of magnitude! Yes, and a cooling system for the heat transfer.
Bye! It is everyone's dream to fly, and today that dream becomes a reality.
Ladies and gentlemen, can I introduce you to FlySy? Oh! Now, I thought that the most senior member of the staff here at the hospital should take the inaugural flight.
Ladies and gentlemen, Chief! Has anybody seen Chief? No, I don't think I've seen her since your tenure party a week ago.
And I haven't seen her since even before that because I couldn't make the tenure party.
Ladies, don't you worry.
I will find her! Whoa, whoa! Oh! You're doing it! Wow.
Chief! I'm coming to get ya! Hello? Hello? Oh, no.
Oh, oh.
Okay, okay, okay.
Chief! I'm coming, Chief! Hang on! Hang on.
Hello? I'm over here! Chief, here I come! I knew someone would find me! Chief? Chief? Thank you! Talk to me, Chief.
Where are you? Okay, you have got to be kidding me.
Guys! Guys, listen up.
Listen, I couldn't find Chief, But this jetpack, it flies great! - Ah! - So what's next, Sy? Wow.
that's a really good question.
A time machine would be cool.
- Oh.
- Ooh.
Hey, wait a minute.
Where is the music, Deejay? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! DJ Lunch, you're up.
Oh, no thanks.
I'll do it myself.
I guess I know what my next project's going to be.
Okay.
Whoo! You got it! That's what she said.
Thank you.
I'm so proud of me.
Hey, hey, hey.
What? What is tenure, exactly? I mean, is it like debt consolidation? - 'cause that was a lifesaver.
- No.
It means he can't get fired, no matter what he does.
He's bulletproof.
Oh, we'll see about that.
No, metaphorically, Chet.
Hey, what is metaphorically, exactly? I mean, is it like debt consolidation? 'cause that was a lifesaver.
Hey, Deejay.
I see you got a new mixer.
Owen, thank God, man.
I got to pee like a monitor dragon.
Oh, no, no, no.
This looks too complicated for me.
Being the deejay is easy.
Just don't touch my bubble machine app, okay? It's my closer.
Thanks, bro! Yeah! Yeah! Uh-huh! Whoo! Yeah, if you like that, how about this? That's it! This is amazing! Wow! And lights! Whoo! You know? Yeah.
Yeah, here we go! How about some bubbles?! Partying! With bubbles! Hey, bro! Bro! What are you doing?! That's my closer! Hey, I'm back, everybody! But I'm the deejay! DJ Déjeuner! Hey, hospital deejay is the last pure democracy on earth.
The people have spoken! (chanting "Owen") Here we go.
I don't mind, bro.
I'll take over for you.
Yeah, take over for him! I'll take over, right? We want more Owen! Whoo! Could somebody help me get down from here? It took two people to get me up here, so Hey, hell of a party last night, Sy.
So, now that you have tenure, what're you gonna do? I'm going to do what anybody in my position would do.
Please say what I hope you're gonna say.
I'm going to design the world's first consumer jetpack.
Yeah! That was totally it! That is exactly what I wanted you -- Whoa.
Okay.
Now, I hope you say You're gonna help me! Yes! That was it again! We are totally in sync -- on the same page! Right.
Hello? Hello! Can anybody hear me?! That's okay.
I'll just I'll just get down myse-- Oh! Ooh! Oh, my God.
Attention, staff.
Last night, an M.
D.
saved my life.
That is all.
So what's your deejay name gonna be? Well, I've thought a lot about that, and I think I'm gonna go with DJ Owen! - DJ Owen, huh? - Yep.
- Okay, I think I get it? - Yeah? I mean -- Oh, wait.
Okay.
Ew! I get it now! You're sick! - It's good, right? - Yeah.
Hey.
Hey, bro.
Are we cool? Owen, being the hospital deejay was my whole life.
Yeah, yeah.
I get it.
Now I'm just a doctor that makes a lot of money who has a great investment guy that makes him a lot of money.
Yeah, yeah.
I totally get it.
I mean, I guess I could use this time to explore new things.
Yeah, I totally get that! So are we cool? Yeah.
Yeah.
We're cool.
Cool! That's great news, 'cause this has always been a dream of mine, dude, I'm telling you.
Man, I wish my dad were alive to see me now.
Your dad wanted you to be a hospital deejay? No.
I just miss him so damn much.
Oh.
Yes, we've been told that the jetpack is way in the future.
Well, today is our future! - Yeah! - Lola, I need you in room six.
Wait, Cat! Sy's talking about jetpacks, Cat! Jetpacks! I know, I know, but I actually really need you-- Shhhhh! Hey, Cat, I am so happy that you're here, because you and Lola, you can be our R&D team.
Congratulations.
- Room 6 needs help.
- Oh, room six can wait.
- The jetpack has waited long enough.
- Right.
- Room 6 actually can't wait because -- - Tenure.
- Okay, but we're so understaffed -- - Tenure.
- But Owen's been deejaying so much -- - Tenure! What's happening here? It's the future.
Of course you've got some kids to tend to, But who's gonna tend to them when they are jetpack-age? Do not be so selfish.
Oh, Cat.
Tenure! There's got to be someone out there.
There's got to be.
Oh! Hey! Over here! Just got to get down from the Over here! Help me.
Hey! Hey! No! No! Don't leave me! Don't leave me, Fernando! Oh, Blake, Blake.
Hey, I didn't realize the hospital rents out the basement.
I've done two bat mitzvahs already today.
When did you learn French? I got time for a lot of things now, man.
It's great.
Oh, by the way, did you know that "DJ Déjeuner" means "DJ Lunch?" So stupid.
Why didn't somebody tell me that? No, another bat mitzvah! Au revoir ! If you come to find out who you are May you find out, may you find out who you are All right.
Any headway here, gals? Attention, staff.
All available doctors report to the E.
R.
Code blue.
And if you come to search for what is lost May you find it, may you find it at any cost Oh! Oh, no! Oh! I'm so sorry! I was watching yoga.
And if you come over from far All right.
Here you go.
Oh, that's probably gonna melt.
All alone down there, my little friend? Well, too bad for you.
Steady now.
No! So hungry.
So weak.
Chief, we're here to save you! We have a fondue and taco bar set up just for you! I'm saved! No! No! Ah, damn it! Chartreuse isn't working, either.
Here.
Can I go now? - What's this? - It's plans for a working jetpack.
I figured it was the only way we could get back to work.
Cat, you've discovered a more efficient fuel that is gonna increase flying times by orders of magnitude! Yes, and a cooling system for the heat transfer.
Bye! It is everyone's dream to fly, and today that dream becomes a reality.
Ladies and gentlemen, can I introduce you to FlySy? Oh! Now, I thought that the most senior member of the staff here at the hospital should take the inaugural flight.
Ladies and gentlemen, Chief! Has anybody seen Chief? No, I don't think I've seen her since your tenure party a week ago.
And I haven't seen her since even before that because I couldn't make the tenure party.
Ladies, don't you worry.
I will find her! Whoa, whoa! Oh! You're doing it! Wow.
Chief! I'm coming to get ya! Hello? Hello? Oh, no.
Oh, oh.
Okay, okay, okay.
Chief! I'm coming, Chief! Hang on! Hang on.
Hello? I'm over here! Chief, here I come! I knew someone would find me! Chief? Chief? Thank you! Talk to me, Chief.
Where are you? Okay, you have got to be kidding me.
Guys! Guys, listen up.
Listen, I couldn't find Chief, But this jetpack, it flies great! - Ah! - So what's next, Sy? Wow.
that's a really good question.
A time machine would be cool.
- Oh.
- Ooh.
Hey, wait a minute.
Where is the music, Deejay? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! DJ Lunch, you're up.
Oh, no thanks.
I'll do it myself.
I guess I know what my next project's going to be.
Okay.
Whoo! You got it! That's what she said.