Charmed s07e04 Episode Script
Charrrmed!
All set.
The kids are asleep.
What about Phoebe and Paige? You want me to put them to bed too? Paige is at school,|and Phoebe went to the movies.
Really? On a date? - No, with a friend.
|- That's good.
She's taking advantage of not|having to be at work in the morning.
That's That's good.
You're stalling.
Don't make it a bigger deal than it is.
You're one Elder calling another|to see if you can help.
But what if they found out? They haven't.
|We already talked about this.
You're not gonna be able to move on|if you don't let go of the past.
That's the reason|you're doing this, remember? - What?|- You'll think I'm crazy.
I already think you're crazy.
- What is it?|- It's just I've been seeing things lately.
Hearing voices that|make me feel like I can't come back.
I don't know if they're|real or not, but they seem like they are.
That's probably just|self-doubt, ignore it.
- Or a guilty conscience.
|- You have nothing to feel guilty about.
What happened was out of your control.
|All that matters is what's next.
So go play nice|with the other Elders.
Please let him get through this.
Hello, Leo.
Hey.
Thanks for coming.
- How have you been?|- Good.
Great.
That's what I wanted|to talk to you about.
We can't let you back up there,|if that's what you want.
No.
I understand.
So any word on who killed Zola yet? No.
But we'll|find who did it.
We have to.
So, what can I help you with? Well, actually,|I was hoping to help you.
I mean, you know, as an Elder.
- I don't quite follow.
|- I want to do what I used to do before Gideon.
I'm just trying to find my way again.
A couple of Whitelighters have|lost track of their charges recently.
Two in the last three nights.
- May be nothing|- Charges.
- Whitelighters-to-be or witches?|- Witches.
Just practitioners.
- Not powerful, but|- I'll get the sisters on it.
Good.
Keep me posted.
He lies, Leo.
He lies.
You can't trust him.
You can't trust yourself.
Hello? Anybody tell you|not to walk alone at night, witch? Help! Help! This should be so easy.
I don't understand|why I can't find them.
I tried sensing them,|summoning them.
I tried scrying for them.
|I gotta be overlooking something.
Or maybe there's nothing to overlook.
I mean, let's face it,|the Elder said this could be nothing.
- They're still missing.
|- Maybe you're trying too hard.
He wants me to do this.
|He wouldn't have given this to me - unless it was something.
|- Okay, so, what do we know so far? What are the common denominators? Besides the fact that they're witches, fog rolled in before they disappeared.
Of course the fog rolled in.
|It's San Francisco.
- What?|- Nothing, it's just I miss this.
Sleepless nights|and endless exposition? Not me.
Do I look like a ma'am to you? Morning, sunshine.
I was just at Magic School taking Wyatt|to the nursery He's fine I might add.
and a student bumped into me|and said, "Excuse me" A kid with manners?|Alert the authorities! You didn't let me finish! He said, "Excuse me ma'am.
" - Do I look like a ma'am?|- He was being respectful.
Something happened|since I took over Magic School.
- You're obsessing.
|- You're damn right I'm obsessing! - I am far too young to be old.
|- Okay, obsess about this instead.
Young women disappearing|around the city when the fog rolls in.
- That's what you got?|- That's all the Elders know.
We haven't been able|to find out much else.
- You spoke to the Elders?|- Yes.
And I promised we'd help.
Good for you.
You know, this actually sounds like a job|for the young, kick-ass Charmed Ones.
Where are you going?|Come with me.
- I'm gonna scry for 'em.
|- We tried.
Didn't work.
Too much time's passed|since the last disappeared.
Why don't we try to find out|if anyone has disappeared recently? - I'm sure the Elders would've told me.
|- Not if they don't know about it yet.
What about Morris?|I'm sure he could ask Missing Persons.
Yeah, go ahead, you can go ask him.
He's outside.
They're watching us? - Staking us out.
|- Is that legal? Apparently Sheridan wants us real bad.
Which means you can't run around|the city looking for missing witches.
Unless there's a distraction.
Phoebe still at home? I don't understand.
I sent|the blood sample three weeks ago.
What do you mean,|you can't find it? - You know they can see us, right?|- I want them to see us.
Sheridan, Inspector Sheridan,|SFPD, the Halliwell case.
No, it's not a murder investigation.
I don't know what it is.
That's why|I need the damn blood results! I hate Feds! Where did you get the sample from? From Piper's bedroom|when I was curiously knocked out.
- What do you think the blood'll show?|- What's really going on.
- You might wanna put on a happy face.
|- Good morning, inspector.
You must be hungry.
Breakfast,|most important meal of the day.
- If you think this will get me|- Yeah.
Okay, wow.
That's better.
Are you out of your mind?|Unfreeze her now! Sorry, can't.
We need to talk.
Listen, I've got nothing to say.
|I made that clear.
Yeah, so I've heard.
About the missing women that|you're not telling the press about? - How'd you find out?|- They're witches.
We need to find them.
Any reported missing|in the last 24 hours? Piper, listen.
|You know I can't help you.
If you want to help Sheridan hang us|out to dry, that's your business.
This is not about that.
|This is about people in trouble.
So are you gonna help us or not? Listen, there was one on|the missing report this morning.
Brenda Castillo, 22.
|She lives in the Heights.
Roommate says|she never came home, - but until she's missing 24|- We'll find her in 12.
Thanks.
You're welcome.
Now,|will you hurry up and unfreeze her? get me off your tail.
Now, inspector,|why would I wanna do that? - Nice try.
|- Whoa! It's all right.
|I'll clean this up! Okay, Paige, you're on.
|Brenda Castillo, the Heights.
Don't bother screaming, love.
|No one can hear you.
- What? What do you want from me?|- We don't want nothing.
However, our captain|would like a word with you.
- Oh, my|- God? 'Fraid not.
You'll have to settle for|Captain Black Jack Cutting.
- Aye, aye, captain!|- Don't you just love clichés? Don't just stand there, you fool.
|Bring it closer! The stench of witch.
I'd know that anywhere.
- What do you want?|- I want you to die but not too fast.
One of your kind cursed me|with this a very long time ago.
Of course, then I used it|to cut her heart out.
Take it away! - What about the Charmed Ones?|- All good things to those who wait.
Do as I say,|or I'll have you in irons! Knock, knock.
Phoebe! Hey,|what are you doing here? I'm just returning your phone call.
Wow, returning my call.
Most people return phone calls|with I don't know, phone calls.
Yeah, well, I kinda|needed to get out of the house.
We're experiencing|a bit of a pest problem.
- Is it serious?|- Too soon to tell.
- What did you call about?|- Well, it was a little timely.
I had to make a decision, but You did give me free reign, didn't you? Yes, absolutely.
How else would I be|enjoying my sabbatical, right? Exactly.
So that's it? Nothing else|you needed to talk to me about? - Nope, I can't think of anything.
|- Ask me? Nothing? Nah.
Okay.
Wait, there was one thing, actually.
I was I was looking through|your notes and ideas last week, - and I found something about a contest.
|- The Win a Date With Phoebe contest.
- That was Elise's idea.
|- I think it's a great idea.
Readers love to be|talked to and not down to.
A date gives you a chance to make them|feel like you're part of their lives.
- Really?|- You know, it's a great PR move.
I mean, I really I'd love to leave you with|more readers than you had when I came.
That's really sweet, Leslie.
But I think I'm taking a break|from the dating world, as well.
Besides, you never know|who's gonna win a contest like that.
Well, I would win it.
I mean, just to protect you, of course.
- Are you asking me out on a date?|- Strictly professional.
How about we go tonight,|we get it over with.
"Get it over with"? So we don't infringe|on your life away from here - any more than we already have.
|- Okay, call me stupid, but shouldn't you run the contest in|the paper before you decide who wins? Details.
I'll I'll hold the copy|on the date and print it after.
So, what do you say.
|Maxine's, 8.
00? All right, 8.
00.
Can I help you? Hi, I'm Paige Matthews.
|I'm here about Brenda Castillo.
Are you from the police? No, I'm just somebody|who's concerned about her.
- I'm sorry.
|- No, please Is Brenda a witch, by any chance? Because if she is,|I think I can help find her.
Come in.
Thanks.
Are you one too? - A witch, I mean.
|- Yeah.
You? Oh, no.
|No, that's Brenda's thing.
You don't believe in witchcraft? I will if it'll help find her.
She wouldn't just not come home.
She never has.
But the police,|they won't do a thing.
Yeah, it's the whole|24 hour deal, right? You guys seem close.
|Are you sisters, roommates? No partners.
That's another reason|the police won't do anything.
They think it's a lover's quarrel,|or something.
Like it's a big joke.
I know it's not a joke.
|Look, if I'm gonna find her, I'm gonna need something,|anything to go off of.
Maybe this'll help.
I found it on the floor|when I got home.
I'd never seen it before.
What do you think it means? Brenda! Brenda.
Brenda.
Go away.
Hurry.
Took you long enough, dearie.
We've been waiting for you.
You wouldn't orb out and leave|an innocent stranded, would you, witch? You look like you've been|out to sea for quite some time.
Nearly 300 years, in a place beyond time and space.
Only when the mystical fog rolls in,|do we get a chance to come and play|in fair port cities like your own.
- See, I would have chosen London.
|- I did.
They didn't have what I want.
- And what's that?|- You and your sisters.
Only you can get me|the treasure I so desire.
- I guess I forgot where I buried it.
|- You're quick with the tongue.
Let me ask you, when the|gathering storm arrives here, will you be making jokes then? "Gathering storm"? I'm so sorry.
|I don't speak pirate, matey.
This is not pirate lore.
This is|something very real, very dangerous.
And I don't intend to be|stuck here when it arrives.
Sword! Excuse me.
Would you mind? Okay, you're supposed to be Dead.
He wishes.
That's gonna leave a mark.
You let her escape! I let her go.
- She's no good alone.
|- Her sisters Will come when they|realise they've no choice.
Are you questioning me, first mate?|Remember your oath? You do as I say when I say it.
|Understand? You all will, or this hell|we're in will never end.
What about the golden chalice? We've had trouble procuring it, sir.
There may be another way.
|For now, make yourselves scarce.
We want the witches|to rescue her, remember! - Aye.
|- Aye.
All right, you need|to slow down and relax.
Okay, I can't because|we need to find Brenda.
Look, whatever their angle is,|whatever the reason is, we can't go in there blind like you did,|which, I may add, was dangerous.
All I did was scry for her|with the coin.
Is that so bad? Look where it got you.
|If you go back in, - you could be walking the plank.
|- Cute.
Strangely, there's|nothing in here about pirates.
- Do you know anything?|- Pirates? A little before my time.
Are you sure there's nothing in here? You need glasses there, ma'am? No! I'm just a little woozy.
We need to know|what we're up against.
We need to go to Magic School since|they're obviously not of this time.
- Who's not?|- Just, you know, pirates.
Pirates? Like hot,|Johnny Depp pirates? - Yeah, probably not.
|- Tell her, Paige.
Tell her what? Why we|left an innocent stranded? No, why we almost lost a sister.
If they'd wanted to kill me,|they would have.
They're obviously after something else.
Yeah, like wanting to kill all of us.
- Okay, what's going on, you two?|- We'll catch you up on the way.
Right now, we need to go|brush up on our pirate lore.
- Can you watch the kids?|- Yeah, but You did your part.
Let us do ours.
Okay, what if we don't find anything?|Pirates aren't known to be magical.
- Do you have a better idea?|- Actually, yes.
I might.
- You wanna know about pirate movies?|- Tell me everything.
- I thought you were on sabbatical.
|- It's not for my column.
It's personal.
Well, I guess Mutiny on the Bounty|is the very best pirate movie.
- The Clark Gable version.
|- Wait, that's not a pirate movie.
That's a swashbuckler.
|There's a big difference.
- Sorry, couldn't help but overhear.
|- Have your doctorate in pirates? I grew up watching pirate movies|with my dad.
Hey, I got this.
Captain Blood and Cutthroat Island.
Blackbeard's Ghost.
|I mean, I've seen 'em all.
Even Yellowbeard.
|It's a great spoof.
- You're full of surprises, aren't you?|- Yeah, wait until tonight.
We're still on, aren't we? You wouldn't wanna|break the pirate's oath.
- The pirate's oath, what's that?|- Oh, yeah.
The captain gives his word to crew,|he's gotta hold to it or face mutiny.
And would I be the captain|or the crew in that analogy? It is your column.
Yeah, I wouldn't want|to disappoint my readers.
So, what else do you|wanna know about pirates? Tell me this isn't happening.
I can't believe he's gonna|pull us off this case.
- Truth is, we don't have much to go on.
|- We've got plenty to go on.
We'd have a lot more|if you came clean.
You think I know more than what I do.
Look, don't insult me, okay? We both know|that you're covering for them.
So don't pretend like you're not.
All I know is, the Halliwells|are really good people.
They do good things.
Like send us on a wild-goose chase|so that they can do God only knows what.
Six years of unsolved crimes,|of all types, all mysteriously connected to them.
I don't care what you say, Morris.
|That's not good people.
- Who're you calling?|- Captain wants proof.
I'm calling the Feds.
See what happened with that|blood sample, once and for all.
You want the Feds? You got 'em.
I think I found something.
I said, I think I found something.
|What, are you deaf now too? Well, you're gonna go deaf first.
|Don't forget, you're the older sister.
Yeah, I love you too.
Okay, so Black Jack Cutting sound familiar? No, we weren't formally introduced.
He tricked a witch into|falling for him in the 18th century so she'd give him immortality.
- Quite a spell.
|- Yeah, it didn't help her much.
He cut her heart out with|the same athame she used to curse him.
- Who?|- What do you mean? The captain, - the guy we're talking about.
|- Right.
Right, right.
Wait, what was the question? Are you all right?|You don't look so good.
I look fine.
And yeah, I'm just concerned with Brenda,|I guess.
I don't know.
Okay, let's see.
He did say something|about a storm, a gathering storm.
There's nothing about a storm,|just the curse.
I guess I'd better make|these potions a little stronger.
Yo-ho, hello! Did you just call me a ho?|How'd you get here? A pirate never betrays|his vow of secrecy.
Leo orbed me.
Ask me anything you wanna know|about buccaneers.
I know everything.
You see a movie critic,|and suddenly you're an expert.
No, I ran into Leslie, and he|taught me everything he knows.
I bet.
Looking forward to your date tonight? No, I'm not.
|It's just a publicity stunt.
Right.
Oops! Paige, what? What happened, honey?|What's wrong with your hand? I don't know.
I think that athame|did more damage than we thought.
I'm gonna just go|sit on the couch.
Okay? Maybe you guys|concentrate on Brenda and making more potions.
Are you sure we're talking|about the same man? All right, thank you.
Okay, Agent Brody, you check out, for now.
Great.
|Now, can we get to work? What agency|did they say he was from? Homeland Security.
- What division?|- The classified one.
You're pretty protective|of the sisters, aren't you? - I've known them a long time.
|- Six and a half years.
I do my homework.
What are you doing here?|What do you want? I wanna know|where you got that blood from.
- Why?|- 'Cause whatever it is, it's not human.
DNA showed a triple helix.
|We've only got two.
Plus plasma, platelets,|Rh factors, all incredible.
Somebody messed up.
You were|not supposed to find that blood.
I don't understand.
You wanna explain it to her? Explain what? What kind of being|that sample came from.
Being? How would I know? Don't worry, lieutenant,|I'm not after you.
I'm after the Halliwells.
The recent rash of missing women|that you've been ignoring matches a pattern|that goes back for decades.
Barbados, Panama, Newfoundland,|New Orleans and now here.
Except they aren't missing women.
- They're missing witches.
|- Witches? Like the three sisters.
If I'm right,|then one will lead us to the other.
So you're saying that|the Halliwells are not human? No, they're human all right.
But the sample,|it just came from something else.
So if I were you,|I'd watch my step.
People tend to disappear|around these girls, especially cops.
Now, I have been looking|for a long time to prove my theories.
Now all I gotta do|is catch 'em in the act.
- But how?|- Got any golden chalices lying around? Maybe Paige scared them away.
It's possible.
Pirates don't run from fights.
|They lure you into them.
Piper, come here!|Grab that lantern.
You must leave.
Who did this to you? Pirates.
He cut me with the athame.
Wait a minute.
Who are you?|What's your name? Brenda.
Save your sister.
We gotta go get Paige.
Paige! Are you okay? Paige? Well Now I'm a ma'am.
Easy, easy, easy.
We gotcha.
It took a little more|out of me than I thought.
- Yeah.
|- Here Couch, couch.
Leo, get up here! Are you two back together? Oh, I forget.
Leo! What's the matter?|What happened? Just heal this now.
Heal heal what? It's Paige! It's just Paige.
|She's just - Don't ask.
Just fix her.
|- Fix? What happened? Well, she got cut by|a cursed athame, and she's aging.
Aging? Well, I can't fix aging.
I can't find a reversal|for the curse in here.
Naturally.
Captain Cutting must be banking|on us finding a reversal to the curse so that we could save them both.
I should check with the Elders.
No, we don't have time.
|She's gaining years by the hour.
Forget about me.
|You have to save Brenda first.
- Sweetie, we lost her already.
|- Yeah, but we're not gonna lose you.
Shiver me britches.
Shiver me britches.
You've got to be kidding me.
No, don't blow him up! Fine! Obviously, he was sent here|for a reason.
What's it say? "Captain Black Jack Cutting cordially|invites you to Treasure Island.
" - We were invited.
|- Invited? Or were you tricked? You wouldn't wanna be|violating parley, would you? Phoebe, now is not the time|for stupid pirate facts.
How would you know about parley? Actually, I know everything|about parley.
Everyone does.
It's the sacredness of the|captain's word, right, Piper? - Remember, Pirates of the Caribbean?|- Okay, so? So it's what keeps|the crew from mutiny.
Yeah.
It's the oath|of the pirates, right? As long as the captain keeps his word,|you're bound to him forever.
Yeah, and what's it to you? Well, quite honestly,|it just doesn't seem fair.
I mean, he's the one|that's cursed, not you, right? I mean, how are you ever|supposed to move on? What are you jabbering about|over there? Bring 'em closer! Whoa! Easy! Come to save your sister, have you? How noble of you.
You're wasting your time.
|We can't reverse the curse.
You don't have to.
Just need to call forth|the Fountain of Youth.
That's a myth.
So are 300-year-old pirates who sail|the high seas searching for revenge! Take it from me,|the Fountain of Youth is very real.
Only Ponce de León had it wrong.
|I've got it right.
And finding it is the only way|to save your precious sister's life.
He wants you to do what? - Break into a museum.
|- To find the Fountain of Youth.
No, to steal a golden chalice|that turns on the Fountain.
- You can't do this.
|- I don't have a choice.
Without the chalice,|I can't cast a spell.
Without the spell,|I can't save Paige.
What if you get caught?|This is what Sheridan wants.
Forget her.
|This is about family.
A family you have to|be able to take care of - if anything happens to us.
|- Piper I mean it.
You need to promise me|you'll be able to take care of them.
- I can't believe you're saying this.
|- Well, believe it.
Ignore the voices, and you'll be fine.
You have to be.
- So far, so good.
|- Oh, yeah? Wow.
If we pull this off,|Paige owes me Prada.
And babysitting for a year.
You're getting a call now? Oh, no! Oh, no!|Piper, it's Leslie.
- I forgot our date.
|- Don't you mean your publicity stunt? What do you want? - I want you to admit that you like him.
|- No.
- You gonna answer it?|- No, we're busy right now.
What am I gonna tell him,|we're robbing a museum? Okay, deep breath.
|Clear your mind.
Think positive, think positive.
|Ready? Ready? Okay, after you.
Easy.
Careful! Okay.
Now what? Nicely done.
This is bad.
This is bad! - How'd you know they'd be here?|- What're you doing? - I'm gonna bust 'em.
|- Not with that you're not.
I don't wanna catch 'em stealing.
|I wanna catch 'em using magic.
- Welcome back, ladies.
|- Stow it! - Here's your chalice.
|- What's your hurry? Now, the spell, if you will.
With these offerings, I call on thee|the goddess of fertility Rise now, show us the truth Give us the gift of eternal youth Look! He's young again! Mother of God.
Now my sister.
What about her? - Run them through!|- Aye.
Whoa! He just broke his oath.
- He promised not to hurt us, remember?|- Kill them! What're you waiting for! He doesn't care about his oath or|parley.
All he cares about is himself.
He promised you treasures? He promised you freedom,|but where is it? He lied.
He broke his oath.
|Now you can too.
Yeah, he did break his oath.
I'll have you drawn and quartered, sir.
Raised from the highest yardarm|until the sun rots your skin! Then I'll feed you to the sharks! Looks like mutiny to me.
You'll die too, you know.
|You're only alive because of me.
It's a fate worse than death,|I can assure you! Thank you.
Nice speech.
There's still some left.
|We gotta get it to Paige.
Wait! We don't want this|happening anytime again.
Hold it right there! I don't know how you did that,|but just don't move.
- Darryl, do something.
|- I can't.
Face down, on the ground.
Now! Dart gun.
I told you, Morris,|I wasn't after you.
She'll be all right.
Gonna|wake up with a hell of a headache.
- Who are you?|- Someone you owe now.
Go on, get out of here.
We'll take care of her.
|Got a sister to save, right? Think you can|give me a hand with her? Seriously, I think|I'm gonna need some help.
Hey.
Hey.
How you feeling? I feel young.
|I feel grateful.
You're not gonna hear me complain about getting old again|till I'm at least 75.
The good news is,|you'll be there before I am.
You're right.
Hey, what did that Agent Brody want? I don't know.
|But that's tomorrow's problem.
- He did a good job.
|- Yeah, he did.
Think it'll stay that way? I hope so.
All right.
Good night, sweetie.
Good night ma'am.
It's not over yet, you know.
His wounds won't easily heal.
They may never.
I know.
Just don't give up on him.
We're all going to need him back before the gathering storm.
Knock, knock.
You're really mad, aren't you? No, no.
|I get stood up all the time.
I'm sure that's not true.
Listen I would have called you, but I|- But what? Why didn't you? - Know what? It's complicated.
|- You use that excuse a lot.
Is it something you're not telling me,|or you think I'm stupid? - No, I don't think you're stupid.
|- What are you afraid of? Who says I'm afraid of anything? - You're afraid of commitment.
|- Commitment? What're you talking about?|I thought this was a publicity stunt.
The hell you did.
Why can't you|just admit you like me? - What is the big deal?|- You're one to talk, mister.
You're the one that had|to orchestrate this whole contest.
- You're too afraid to ask me out.
|- That's not true.
- No?|- It's not true.
Oh, really? Okay.
Then how come|you didn't tell me about it until after you already printed it? Until after you "won" the contest? Yeah, that's right,|I knew the whole time.
- You didn't say anything.
|- No, you didn't.
- You never called me back!|- That's lame! If you knew, why agree|to go through with it? - Well, because I|- Because of what? Come on! Honestly,|you wanna know the truth? I didn't want to embarrass you.
- Wrong answer.
|- You don't know me! - You won't let me know you.
|- Not true! You're afraid of getting involved.
- You're afraid of getting hurt.
|- Save the advice for your readers.
You read me.
The kids are asleep.
What about Phoebe and Paige? You want me to put them to bed too? Paige is at school,|and Phoebe went to the movies.
Really? On a date? - No, with a friend.
|- That's good.
She's taking advantage of not|having to be at work in the morning.
That's That's good.
You're stalling.
Don't make it a bigger deal than it is.
You're one Elder calling another|to see if you can help.
But what if they found out? They haven't.
|We already talked about this.
You're not gonna be able to move on|if you don't let go of the past.
That's the reason|you're doing this, remember? - What?|- You'll think I'm crazy.
I already think you're crazy.
- What is it?|- It's just I've been seeing things lately.
Hearing voices that|make me feel like I can't come back.
I don't know if they're|real or not, but they seem like they are.
That's probably just|self-doubt, ignore it.
- Or a guilty conscience.
|- You have nothing to feel guilty about.
What happened was out of your control.
|All that matters is what's next.
So go play nice|with the other Elders.
Please let him get through this.
Hello, Leo.
Hey.
Thanks for coming.
- How have you been?|- Good.
Great.
That's what I wanted|to talk to you about.
We can't let you back up there,|if that's what you want.
No.
I understand.
So any word on who killed Zola yet? No.
But we'll|find who did it.
We have to.
So, what can I help you with? Well, actually,|I was hoping to help you.
I mean, you know, as an Elder.
- I don't quite follow.
|- I want to do what I used to do before Gideon.
I'm just trying to find my way again.
A couple of Whitelighters have|lost track of their charges recently.
Two in the last three nights.
- May be nothing|- Charges.
- Whitelighters-to-be or witches?|- Witches.
Just practitioners.
- Not powerful, but|- I'll get the sisters on it.
Good.
Keep me posted.
He lies, Leo.
He lies.
You can't trust him.
You can't trust yourself.
Hello? Anybody tell you|not to walk alone at night, witch? Help! Help! This should be so easy.
I don't understand|why I can't find them.
I tried sensing them,|summoning them.
I tried scrying for them.
|I gotta be overlooking something.
Or maybe there's nothing to overlook.
I mean, let's face it,|the Elder said this could be nothing.
- They're still missing.
|- Maybe you're trying too hard.
He wants me to do this.
|He wouldn't have given this to me - unless it was something.
|- Okay, so, what do we know so far? What are the common denominators? Besides the fact that they're witches, fog rolled in before they disappeared.
Of course the fog rolled in.
|It's San Francisco.
- What?|- Nothing, it's just I miss this.
Sleepless nights|and endless exposition? Not me.
Do I look like a ma'am to you? Morning, sunshine.
I was just at Magic School taking Wyatt|to the nursery He's fine I might add.
and a student bumped into me|and said, "Excuse me" A kid with manners?|Alert the authorities! You didn't let me finish! He said, "Excuse me ma'am.
" - Do I look like a ma'am?|- He was being respectful.
Something happened|since I took over Magic School.
- You're obsessing.
|- You're damn right I'm obsessing! - I am far too young to be old.
|- Okay, obsess about this instead.
Young women disappearing|around the city when the fog rolls in.
- That's what you got?|- That's all the Elders know.
We haven't been able|to find out much else.
- You spoke to the Elders?|- Yes.
And I promised we'd help.
Good for you.
You know, this actually sounds like a job|for the young, kick-ass Charmed Ones.
Where are you going?|Come with me.
- I'm gonna scry for 'em.
|- We tried.
Didn't work.
Too much time's passed|since the last disappeared.
Why don't we try to find out|if anyone has disappeared recently? - I'm sure the Elders would've told me.
|- Not if they don't know about it yet.
What about Morris?|I'm sure he could ask Missing Persons.
Yeah, go ahead, you can go ask him.
He's outside.
They're watching us? - Staking us out.
|- Is that legal? Apparently Sheridan wants us real bad.
Which means you can't run around|the city looking for missing witches.
Unless there's a distraction.
Phoebe still at home? I don't understand.
I sent|the blood sample three weeks ago.
What do you mean,|you can't find it? - You know they can see us, right?|- I want them to see us.
Sheridan, Inspector Sheridan,|SFPD, the Halliwell case.
No, it's not a murder investigation.
I don't know what it is.
That's why|I need the damn blood results! I hate Feds! Where did you get the sample from? From Piper's bedroom|when I was curiously knocked out.
- What do you think the blood'll show?|- What's really going on.
- You might wanna put on a happy face.
|- Good morning, inspector.
You must be hungry.
Breakfast,|most important meal of the day.
- If you think this will get me|- Yeah.
Okay, wow.
That's better.
Are you out of your mind?|Unfreeze her now! Sorry, can't.
We need to talk.
Listen, I've got nothing to say.
|I made that clear.
Yeah, so I've heard.
About the missing women that|you're not telling the press about? - How'd you find out?|- They're witches.
We need to find them.
Any reported missing|in the last 24 hours? Piper, listen.
|You know I can't help you.
If you want to help Sheridan hang us|out to dry, that's your business.
This is not about that.
|This is about people in trouble.
So are you gonna help us or not? Listen, there was one on|the missing report this morning.
Brenda Castillo, 22.
|She lives in the Heights.
Roommate says|she never came home, - but until she's missing 24|- We'll find her in 12.
Thanks.
You're welcome.
Now,|will you hurry up and unfreeze her? get me off your tail.
Now, inspector,|why would I wanna do that? - Nice try.
|- Whoa! It's all right.
|I'll clean this up! Okay, Paige, you're on.
|Brenda Castillo, the Heights.
Don't bother screaming, love.
|No one can hear you.
- What? What do you want from me?|- We don't want nothing.
However, our captain|would like a word with you.
- Oh, my|- God? 'Fraid not.
You'll have to settle for|Captain Black Jack Cutting.
- Aye, aye, captain!|- Don't you just love clichés? Don't just stand there, you fool.
|Bring it closer! The stench of witch.
I'd know that anywhere.
- What do you want?|- I want you to die but not too fast.
One of your kind cursed me|with this a very long time ago.
Of course, then I used it|to cut her heart out.
Take it away! - What about the Charmed Ones?|- All good things to those who wait.
Do as I say,|or I'll have you in irons! Knock, knock.
Phoebe! Hey,|what are you doing here? I'm just returning your phone call.
Wow, returning my call.
Most people return phone calls|with I don't know, phone calls.
Yeah, well, I kinda|needed to get out of the house.
We're experiencing|a bit of a pest problem.
- Is it serious?|- Too soon to tell.
- What did you call about?|- Well, it was a little timely.
I had to make a decision, but You did give me free reign, didn't you? Yes, absolutely.
How else would I be|enjoying my sabbatical, right? Exactly.
So that's it? Nothing else|you needed to talk to me about? - Nope, I can't think of anything.
|- Ask me? Nothing? Nah.
Okay.
Wait, there was one thing, actually.
I was I was looking through|your notes and ideas last week, - and I found something about a contest.
|- The Win a Date With Phoebe contest.
- That was Elise's idea.
|- I think it's a great idea.
Readers love to be|talked to and not down to.
A date gives you a chance to make them|feel like you're part of their lives.
- Really?|- You know, it's a great PR move.
I mean, I really I'd love to leave you with|more readers than you had when I came.
That's really sweet, Leslie.
But I think I'm taking a break|from the dating world, as well.
Besides, you never know|who's gonna win a contest like that.
Well, I would win it.
I mean, just to protect you, of course.
- Are you asking me out on a date?|- Strictly professional.
How about we go tonight,|we get it over with.
"Get it over with"? So we don't infringe|on your life away from here - any more than we already have.
|- Okay, call me stupid, but shouldn't you run the contest in|the paper before you decide who wins? Details.
I'll I'll hold the copy|on the date and print it after.
So, what do you say.
|Maxine's, 8.
00? All right, 8.
00.
Can I help you? Hi, I'm Paige Matthews.
|I'm here about Brenda Castillo.
Are you from the police? No, I'm just somebody|who's concerned about her.
- I'm sorry.
|- No, please Is Brenda a witch, by any chance? Because if she is,|I think I can help find her.
Come in.
Thanks.
Are you one too? - A witch, I mean.
|- Yeah.
You? Oh, no.
|No, that's Brenda's thing.
You don't believe in witchcraft? I will if it'll help find her.
She wouldn't just not come home.
She never has.
But the police,|they won't do a thing.
Yeah, it's the whole|24 hour deal, right? You guys seem close.
|Are you sisters, roommates? No partners.
That's another reason|the police won't do anything.
They think it's a lover's quarrel,|or something.
Like it's a big joke.
I know it's not a joke.
|Look, if I'm gonna find her, I'm gonna need something,|anything to go off of.
Maybe this'll help.
I found it on the floor|when I got home.
I'd never seen it before.
What do you think it means? Brenda! Brenda.
Brenda.
Go away.
Hurry.
Took you long enough, dearie.
We've been waiting for you.
You wouldn't orb out and leave|an innocent stranded, would you, witch? You look like you've been|out to sea for quite some time.
Nearly 300 years, in a place beyond time and space.
Only when the mystical fog rolls in,|do we get a chance to come and play|in fair port cities like your own.
- See, I would have chosen London.
|- I did.
They didn't have what I want.
- And what's that?|- You and your sisters.
Only you can get me|the treasure I so desire.
- I guess I forgot where I buried it.
|- You're quick with the tongue.
Let me ask you, when the|gathering storm arrives here, will you be making jokes then? "Gathering storm"? I'm so sorry.
|I don't speak pirate, matey.
This is not pirate lore.
This is|something very real, very dangerous.
And I don't intend to be|stuck here when it arrives.
Sword! Excuse me.
Would you mind? Okay, you're supposed to be Dead.
He wishes.
That's gonna leave a mark.
You let her escape! I let her go.
- She's no good alone.
|- Her sisters Will come when they|realise they've no choice.
Are you questioning me, first mate?|Remember your oath? You do as I say when I say it.
|Understand? You all will, or this hell|we're in will never end.
What about the golden chalice? We've had trouble procuring it, sir.
There may be another way.
|For now, make yourselves scarce.
We want the witches|to rescue her, remember! - Aye.
|- Aye.
All right, you need|to slow down and relax.
Okay, I can't because|we need to find Brenda.
Look, whatever their angle is,|whatever the reason is, we can't go in there blind like you did,|which, I may add, was dangerous.
All I did was scry for her|with the coin.
Is that so bad? Look where it got you.
|If you go back in, - you could be walking the plank.
|- Cute.
Strangely, there's|nothing in here about pirates.
- Do you know anything?|- Pirates? A little before my time.
Are you sure there's nothing in here? You need glasses there, ma'am? No! I'm just a little woozy.
We need to know|what we're up against.
We need to go to Magic School since|they're obviously not of this time.
- Who's not?|- Just, you know, pirates.
Pirates? Like hot,|Johnny Depp pirates? - Yeah, probably not.
|- Tell her, Paige.
Tell her what? Why we|left an innocent stranded? No, why we almost lost a sister.
If they'd wanted to kill me,|they would have.
They're obviously after something else.
Yeah, like wanting to kill all of us.
- Okay, what's going on, you two?|- We'll catch you up on the way.
Right now, we need to go|brush up on our pirate lore.
- Can you watch the kids?|- Yeah, but You did your part.
Let us do ours.
Okay, what if we don't find anything?|Pirates aren't known to be magical.
- Do you have a better idea?|- Actually, yes.
I might.
- You wanna know about pirate movies?|- Tell me everything.
- I thought you were on sabbatical.
|- It's not for my column.
It's personal.
Well, I guess Mutiny on the Bounty|is the very best pirate movie.
- The Clark Gable version.
|- Wait, that's not a pirate movie.
That's a swashbuckler.
|There's a big difference.
- Sorry, couldn't help but overhear.
|- Have your doctorate in pirates? I grew up watching pirate movies|with my dad.
Hey, I got this.
Captain Blood and Cutthroat Island.
Blackbeard's Ghost.
|I mean, I've seen 'em all.
Even Yellowbeard.
|It's a great spoof.
- You're full of surprises, aren't you?|- Yeah, wait until tonight.
We're still on, aren't we? You wouldn't wanna|break the pirate's oath.
- The pirate's oath, what's that?|- Oh, yeah.
The captain gives his word to crew,|he's gotta hold to it or face mutiny.
And would I be the captain|or the crew in that analogy? It is your column.
Yeah, I wouldn't want|to disappoint my readers.
So, what else do you|wanna know about pirates? Tell me this isn't happening.
I can't believe he's gonna|pull us off this case.
- Truth is, we don't have much to go on.
|- We've got plenty to go on.
We'd have a lot more|if you came clean.
You think I know more than what I do.
Look, don't insult me, okay? We both know|that you're covering for them.
So don't pretend like you're not.
All I know is, the Halliwells|are really good people.
They do good things.
Like send us on a wild-goose chase|so that they can do God only knows what.
Six years of unsolved crimes,|of all types, all mysteriously connected to them.
I don't care what you say, Morris.
|That's not good people.
- Who're you calling?|- Captain wants proof.
I'm calling the Feds.
See what happened with that|blood sample, once and for all.
You want the Feds? You got 'em.
I think I found something.
I said, I think I found something.
|What, are you deaf now too? Well, you're gonna go deaf first.
|Don't forget, you're the older sister.
Yeah, I love you too.
Okay, so Black Jack Cutting sound familiar? No, we weren't formally introduced.
He tricked a witch into|falling for him in the 18th century so she'd give him immortality.
- Quite a spell.
|- Yeah, it didn't help her much.
He cut her heart out with|the same athame she used to curse him.
- Who?|- What do you mean? The captain, - the guy we're talking about.
|- Right.
Right, right.
Wait, what was the question? Are you all right?|You don't look so good.
I look fine.
And yeah, I'm just concerned with Brenda,|I guess.
I don't know.
Okay, let's see.
He did say something|about a storm, a gathering storm.
There's nothing about a storm,|just the curse.
I guess I'd better make|these potions a little stronger.
Yo-ho, hello! Did you just call me a ho?|How'd you get here? A pirate never betrays|his vow of secrecy.
Leo orbed me.
Ask me anything you wanna know|about buccaneers.
I know everything.
You see a movie critic,|and suddenly you're an expert.
No, I ran into Leslie, and he|taught me everything he knows.
I bet.
Looking forward to your date tonight? No, I'm not.
|It's just a publicity stunt.
Right.
Oops! Paige, what? What happened, honey?|What's wrong with your hand? I don't know.
I think that athame|did more damage than we thought.
I'm gonna just go|sit on the couch.
Okay? Maybe you guys|concentrate on Brenda and making more potions.
Are you sure we're talking|about the same man? All right, thank you.
Okay, Agent Brody, you check out, for now.
Great.
|Now, can we get to work? What agency|did they say he was from? Homeland Security.
- What division?|- The classified one.
You're pretty protective|of the sisters, aren't you? - I've known them a long time.
|- Six and a half years.
I do my homework.
What are you doing here?|What do you want? I wanna know|where you got that blood from.
- Why?|- 'Cause whatever it is, it's not human.
DNA showed a triple helix.
|We've only got two.
Plus plasma, platelets,|Rh factors, all incredible.
Somebody messed up.
You were|not supposed to find that blood.
I don't understand.
You wanna explain it to her? Explain what? What kind of being|that sample came from.
Being? How would I know? Don't worry, lieutenant,|I'm not after you.
I'm after the Halliwells.
The recent rash of missing women|that you've been ignoring matches a pattern|that goes back for decades.
Barbados, Panama, Newfoundland,|New Orleans and now here.
Except they aren't missing women.
- They're missing witches.
|- Witches? Like the three sisters.
If I'm right,|then one will lead us to the other.
So you're saying that|the Halliwells are not human? No, they're human all right.
But the sample,|it just came from something else.
So if I were you,|I'd watch my step.
People tend to disappear|around these girls, especially cops.
Now, I have been looking|for a long time to prove my theories.
Now all I gotta do|is catch 'em in the act.
- But how?|- Got any golden chalices lying around? Maybe Paige scared them away.
It's possible.
Pirates don't run from fights.
|They lure you into them.
Piper, come here!|Grab that lantern.
You must leave.
Who did this to you? Pirates.
He cut me with the athame.
Wait a minute.
Who are you?|What's your name? Brenda.
Save your sister.
We gotta go get Paige.
Paige! Are you okay? Paige? Well Now I'm a ma'am.
Easy, easy, easy.
We gotcha.
It took a little more|out of me than I thought.
- Yeah.
|- Here Couch, couch.
Leo, get up here! Are you two back together? Oh, I forget.
Leo! What's the matter?|What happened? Just heal this now.
Heal heal what? It's Paige! It's just Paige.
|She's just - Don't ask.
Just fix her.
|- Fix? What happened? Well, she got cut by|a cursed athame, and she's aging.
Aging? Well, I can't fix aging.
I can't find a reversal|for the curse in here.
Naturally.
Captain Cutting must be banking|on us finding a reversal to the curse so that we could save them both.
I should check with the Elders.
No, we don't have time.
|She's gaining years by the hour.
Forget about me.
|You have to save Brenda first.
- Sweetie, we lost her already.
|- Yeah, but we're not gonna lose you.
Shiver me britches.
Shiver me britches.
You've got to be kidding me.
No, don't blow him up! Fine! Obviously, he was sent here|for a reason.
What's it say? "Captain Black Jack Cutting cordially|invites you to Treasure Island.
" - We were invited.
|- Invited? Or were you tricked? You wouldn't wanna be|violating parley, would you? Phoebe, now is not the time|for stupid pirate facts.
How would you know about parley? Actually, I know everything|about parley.
Everyone does.
It's the sacredness of the|captain's word, right, Piper? - Remember, Pirates of the Caribbean?|- Okay, so? So it's what keeps|the crew from mutiny.
Yeah.
It's the oath|of the pirates, right? As long as the captain keeps his word,|you're bound to him forever.
Yeah, and what's it to you? Well, quite honestly,|it just doesn't seem fair.
I mean, he's the one|that's cursed, not you, right? I mean, how are you ever|supposed to move on? What are you jabbering about|over there? Bring 'em closer! Whoa! Easy! Come to save your sister, have you? How noble of you.
You're wasting your time.
|We can't reverse the curse.
You don't have to.
Just need to call forth|the Fountain of Youth.
That's a myth.
So are 300-year-old pirates who sail|the high seas searching for revenge! Take it from me,|the Fountain of Youth is very real.
Only Ponce de León had it wrong.
|I've got it right.
And finding it is the only way|to save your precious sister's life.
He wants you to do what? - Break into a museum.
|- To find the Fountain of Youth.
No, to steal a golden chalice|that turns on the Fountain.
- You can't do this.
|- I don't have a choice.
Without the chalice,|I can't cast a spell.
Without the spell,|I can't save Paige.
What if you get caught?|This is what Sheridan wants.
Forget her.
|This is about family.
A family you have to|be able to take care of - if anything happens to us.
|- Piper I mean it.
You need to promise me|you'll be able to take care of them.
- I can't believe you're saying this.
|- Well, believe it.
Ignore the voices, and you'll be fine.
You have to be.
- So far, so good.
|- Oh, yeah? Wow.
If we pull this off,|Paige owes me Prada.
And babysitting for a year.
You're getting a call now? Oh, no! Oh, no!|Piper, it's Leslie.
- I forgot our date.
|- Don't you mean your publicity stunt? What do you want? - I want you to admit that you like him.
|- No.
- You gonna answer it?|- No, we're busy right now.
What am I gonna tell him,|we're robbing a museum? Okay, deep breath.
|Clear your mind.
Think positive, think positive.
|Ready? Ready? Okay, after you.
Easy.
Careful! Okay.
Now what? Nicely done.
This is bad.
This is bad! - How'd you know they'd be here?|- What're you doing? - I'm gonna bust 'em.
|- Not with that you're not.
I don't wanna catch 'em stealing.
|I wanna catch 'em using magic.
- Welcome back, ladies.
|- Stow it! - Here's your chalice.
|- What's your hurry? Now, the spell, if you will.
With these offerings, I call on thee|the goddess of fertility Rise now, show us the truth Give us the gift of eternal youth Look! He's young again! Mother of God.
Now my sister.
What about her? - Run them through!|- Aye.
Whoa! He just broke his oath.
- He promised not to hurt us, remember?|- Kill them! What're you waiting for! He doesn't care about his oath or|parley.
All he cares about is himself.
He promised you treasures? He promised you freedom,|but where is it? He lied.
He broke his oath.
|Now you can too.
Yeah, he did break his oath.
I'll have you drawn and quartered, sir.
Raised from the highest yardarm|until the sun rots your skin! Then I'll feed you to the sharks! Looks like mutiny to me.
You'll die too, you know.
|You're only alive because of me.
It's a fate worse than death,|I can assure you! Thank you.
Nice speech.
There's still some left.
|We gotta get it to Paige.
Wait! We don't want this|happening anytime again.
Hold it right there! I don't know how you did that,|but just don't move.
- Darryl, do something.
|- I can't.
Face down, on the ground.
Now! Dart gun.
I told you, Morris,|I wasn't after you.
She'll be all right.
Gonna|wake up with a hell of a headache.
- Who are you?|- Someone you owe now.
Go on, get out of here.
We'll take care of her.
|Got a sister to save, right? Think you can|give me a hand with her? Seriously, I think|I'm gonna need some help.
Hey.
Hey.
How you feeling? I feel young.
|I feel grateful.
You're not gonna hear me complain about getting old again|till I'm at least 75.
The good news is,|you'll be there before I am.
You're right.
Hey, what did that Agent Brody want? I don't know.
|But that's tomorrow's problem.
- He did a good job.
|- Yeah, he did.
Think it'll stay that way? I hope so.
All right.
Good night, sweetie.
Good night ma'am.
It's not over yet, you know.
His wounds won't easily heal.
They may never.
I know.
Just don't give up on him.
We're all going to need him back before the gathering storm.
Knock, knock.
You're really mad, aren't you? No, no.
|I get stood up all the time.
I'm sure that's not true.
Listen I would have called you, but I|- But what? Why didn't you? - Know what? It's complicated.
|- You use that excuse a lot.
Is it something you're not telling me,|or you think I'm stupid? - No, I don't think you're stupid.
|- What are you afraid of? Who says I'm afraid of anything? - You're afraid of commitment.
|- Commitment? What're you talking about?|I thought this was a publicity stunt.
The hell you did.
Why can't you|just admit you like me? - What is the big deal?|- You're one to talk, mister.
You're the one that had|to orchestrate this whole contest.
- You're too afraid to ask me out.
|- That's not true.
- No?|- It's not true.
Oh, really? Okay.
Then how come|you didn't tell me about it until after you already printed it? Until after you "won" the contest? Yeah, that's right,|I knew the whole time.
- You didn't say anything.
|- No, you didn't.
- You never called me back!|- That's lame! If you knew, why agree|to go through with it? - Well, because I|- Because of what? Come on! Honestly,|you wanna know the truth? I didn't want to embarrass you.
- Wrong answer.
|- You don't know me! - You won't let me know you.
|- Not true! You're afraid of getting involved.
- You're afraid of getting hurt.
|- Save the advice for your readers.
You read me.