Comic Book Men s07e04 Episode Script

Method Man's Mego

1 [ Funky.]
Flanagan: You guys are snowbound in a cabin.
There's nothing to light your fire with except an "Action Comics" number one.
There's probably less than 100 of these in existence.
You're gonna die if you don't get this fire lit, and that's the only tinder you have.
Do you do it? - Yeah.
- [Laughter.]
Is that a real question? So, you're going on the record out loud, and saying "Action Comics" number one is destroyed.
Not only am I doing it, I'm live-streaming it so everybody can see me.
[Laughter.]
Look at that.
Look at the disgust on his face.
- Right? - That's awful.
Just hearing you say those words, that you would light it on fire makes me cringe.
What do you do, Ming? Tell him what you should do in that situation.
Chen: I mean I-I'd let myself go.
- I'd die.
- [Laughter.]
You'd embrace it? [Laughter.]
Yeah.
You know what? I-I'd die happy knowing that's the last thing I see.
Bravo.
Mike? Johnson: Are you gonna man up and die? Zapcic: No! It's only important if I'm there to enjoy it.
It's my "Action Comics," I just found You know when they send the search party out they're gonna find the "Action Comics" number one.
Somebody else gets to enjoy it because I'm dead! Is the search party for him or for the comic? [Laughter.]
[ Dramatic music.]
[Roar.]
- Help! - Help! Help! [Mechanical whirring.]
Hello, welcome to another scintillating episode of Comic Book Men, the only show that went to Paradise Island and asked to use the men's room.
I'm Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
I have not heard a story about workin' in a comic book store for too long.
Hit me.
I love when stuff comes into the Stash that transports you right back to your childhood.
[ Funky music.]
- Hey.
- Hey, guys.
- How are ya? - Good.
- How you doin'? - What can I do for you today? I was wondering if you guys were interested in old TV cop shows from the '70s.
Are we?! That was the golden age of cop television shows.
I have something pretty interesting.
Maybe you wanna come and take a look at it outside.
All right.
Take a look.
All right.
[ Suspenseful music.]
- Oh! - Wow.
Finally, something cool comes in! [Laughing.]
[ Groovy music.]
The Gran Torino from "Starsky & Hutch!" Car owner: Well, what do you think? Bringin' back memories for ya? Tuggin' my heartstrings! Car owner: This is the actual, screen-used, one of three left.
This was known as the stunt car, or the bucket seat car, because it came with a bench, but every time they would do a stunt, David Soul would slide into Paul, so they talked the directors into putting bucket seats in.
Flanagan: To have a screen-used "Starsky & Hutch" car, you gotta be the biggest fan.
Well, I-I think I am.
"Starsky & Hutch" is the reason I became a police officer.
We chose a different way to serve the public, you know, by selling comics.
Chen: I gotta admit, when I watched the show, I didn't care about Starsky, didn't care about Hutch.
I watched the show just for the car.
A lot of people felt the same way.
It was the show that opened my eyes that, like, two guys, you know, can become, like, a friendship.
They can become love each other like brothers.
You know, it really made me, like, aspire to find a friend like that.
Then I started working with them and it never happened.
[Laughter.]
You know, we talk a lot about, like, superheroes defining us as adults.
Seeing that kind of affection that Starsky & Hutch had, I think I became a good friend by watching "Starsky & Hutch.
" David Soul gave you soul.
That's profound.
[Laughter.]
- Zapcic: Brofound? - Brofound, dude.
Johnson: It made me wanna become a cop.
- Smith: Did it? - A crooked cop, but still [Laughter.]
Did you notice the sweater inside? It's a replica of the Starsky sweater, and I have replica of the guns that they both carried.
Flanagan: I can't imagine you brought the "Starsky and Hutch" car here today to sell it.
Have you? No, this is not for sale, but I do have some pretty cool things in the trunk.
Come on over.
[ Dramatic music.]
Whoa! [ Funky music.]
Flanagan: Oh, my God! Zapcic: The "Starsky & Hutch" motherload.
That's just a portion of it.
Chen: Hey, walkie-talkies! Wow.
Flanagan: Imagine if we had those walkies at the Stash.
Oh! Flanagan: It would be awesome.
Flanagan: Do you have every "Starsky & Hutch" product ever produced? I think I got about 98 percent.
But some of these things you'd be willing to sell today? Yeah, I'm willing to talk to yous.
I gotta be honest with you.
Johnson: Papa needs a new pair of socks.
Flanagan: You ain't whistlin' Dixie, brother.
I need these.
What would it take today for you to sell us the walkie-talkies and the hosiery? I'd sell these for $100, and these for $40.
Would you be able to come down a little? Well, what are you look What are you talkin'? I mean, I'll treat them with the utmost respect, and you'll never have to worry about me ever reselling 'em.
Is there any chance you could do $100? I would do that.
I would do that for yous.
You got yourself a deal.
Thank you so much! Car owner: No problem.
Hey, while I got you here, though, would it be possible to take me for a spin in the car? Absolutely.
And by "me" you mean "us" right? What do you mean "us"? There's a back seat.
We could fit.
Nobody wants to ride in the back seat.
I could pretend I'm a perp! [Laughter.]
Pretend? [Laughter.]
What it feel like? It felt like I should bust some heads and fight some crime, man.
[Laughter.]
I am ready, Zebra Three.
I got my sweater on, and most importantly, got my socks on, huh? - Let's go, Steve.
- Let's roll.
[Engine roars.]
[ Funky music.]
What's up, fellas? How y'all doin', man? Man, you know who this is? Method Man, man.
Wu-Tang Clan.
"Eminem and the Punisher: Kill You.
" One of the biggest artists of all time.
[ Groovy music.]
[Chuckling.]
What's up, fellas? How y'all doin', man? I'm finally here at the Stash, Ming Chen.
What's goin' on? You know who this is? This is Method Man, man.
Wu-Tang Clan, Method Man & Redman, Luke Cage.
- Zapcic: Luke Cage, love him.
- Johnson: Yeah.
Also did a song on the "Batman" soundtrack, the one that had Jim Carrey in it, the Riddler song, yeah.
- Really? - Yeah, yeah.
Forget all that.
Cheese from "The Wire.
" You know? That's right.
That's right.
That's right.
Flanagan: What's goin' on? What brings you to the Stash? Method Man: Man, I'm a big fan of the show, I've been watchin' since Season One, - and man, I been tryin' to get down here for years.
- Really? Chen: Yeah, so, you know, not only superstar musician, fan of the show, huge fan of comics.
You guys have no idea.
This is one of the coolest comic book shops in the entire world! - Oh! - Method Man: I said it.
I said it.
Yes, I said it.
- We believe it, too.
- Yes, sir.
Get outta here! M-E-T-H-O-D Man.
[Laughter.]
Turns out, huge fan of the show.
- Really?! - Really! Smith: That's flattering to hear.
Method Man is part of the legendary Wu-Tang Clan, one of the greatest hip hop acts of all time.
Then he spun off and did solo stuff, then he acted, so he's been one of those guys that's, like, not content to just stick to hip hop.
He's like, "Let me see what doors hip hop can open for me?" Flanagan: Okay, so I ask you a question.
You are, like, the real deal, superstar rapper.
Do you have to keep your love of comic books on the down low? Down low? Oh, you're good.
[Laughter.]
Flanagan: Or do you let it or do you let it be known that you love comic books? I've never had to hide it, never.
People I was known for it.
You know, my first real experience with comics was "X-Men.
" Just blew my mind away, first time I seen it.
It was Big collection? I've got over 30,000 comics.
I'm not bragging.
- Oh! - 30,000 comics.
Method Man: 30,000, yeah.
They're all stashed in my, uh, garage, and, uh, yeah, it gets on my wife's nerves, but she's cool with it.
Flanagan: Yeah, what's your prized comic in your collection? I'm glad you said that because I actually brought it here.
[Laughter.]
First full appearance of Wolverine.
"The Incredible Hulk" 181.
Ah! Flanagan: One of the most significant books in comic book history.
Legit.
Okay.
Yes, I am legit.
You all ready.
Flanagan: Where'd you get it? Method Man: It was actually given to me by my comic book dealer, so to speak.
My-my-my drug dealer, my dope dealer.
Mr.
Socko.
Should you be saying he's a drug dealer, though? I mean, he's a comic book.
[Overlapping chatter, laughter.]
We would be considered dealers too, then, right? Method Man: You guys are dealers.
In the streets, we would call you the plug.
- Ooh, yeah.
- Walt the plug.
I'm definitely calling him that.
[Laughter.]
In the streets, inside, wherever he is.
Flanagan: I wonder if there's people who buy comics from me that, like, refer to me as their dealer.
Oh, I think you've got that title.
I think a lot of people would call you the pusher.
Oh, man, that would be cool if I'm being referred to as a dealer and a pusher.
It would be a lot cooler if it was drugs.
You know how much money we could make? Nobody cares about comics.
Let's make some money! What would this comic book be rated, 'cause I-I-I wanna know if I have a treasure in my little stash.
Flanagan: At first glance, it's super high grade, but there's a value stamp inside of it and a lot of people clip those.
Mike, would you You wanna I-I'm a little hesitant to open up Mr.
Man's comics, so if you wanted to check his check his stamp? Zapcic: Right off the bat, I mean, I'm-I'm loath to open this, 'cause it doesn't look like it's ever been opened.
- Look at that gloss.
- Flanagan: Yeah, it's nice.
Well taken care of.
Zapcic: Here we go.
Do we have the stamp? We've got the stamp.
[All cheering.]
- Chen: We've got the stamp.
- Zapcic: All right.
I'm-I'm putting this at like an 8.
5, plus.
Method Man: Gotcha.
So, from your assessment, what do you think dollar-wise? If we were gonna sell it in here, I'd put it up for $1,800.
Eh, that's a lot of "Bluntman and Chronic.
" [Laughter.]
Uh! Flanagan: Well, you haven't even got a chance to look around the store.
Ya know? Take a look around.
See if there's anything you dig.
I'm glad you said that, because I actually did see somethin' up there Aquaman Mego.
Ah, there it is.
Ah! Chen: There you go.
Flanagan: This is the 1973 Aquaman Mego.
Method Man: Is this the real deal, here? What's good? - Flanagan: Sure is.
- [Laughing.]
- Nice clean box.
- Method Man: Yeah.
- Flanagan: Cellophane, no dents.
- Method Man: Yeah.
What's the damage gonna be, Walt? I'll get $400 for it.
Ooh, that's that's kinda steep.
You would never see these two guys meet anywhere except in a comic.
Flanagan: I love the tradition of musicians appearing in comic books.
Method Man: $400.
They're not making any more of these.
Johnson: I think we're witnessing the beginnings of a beef! [Chatter, laughter.]
[ Upbeat music.]
Flanagan: You still running those marathons? You look like Gettin' a little soft there.
Yeah, I am getting a little doughy.
- No, not doughy.
- Yes! He's soft.
Look at him.
You're an embarrassment.
Not afraid to admit that, but I think I could go back any time I wanted.
You were at the top of your game, man.
It's over.
- Chen: It's not over.
- Flanagan: How're you doin'? Good.
I think I have something you guys might want.
Flanagan: Wow.
What is that? Seller: It's "Eminem and the Punisher: Kill You.
" It's put out by Marvel and XXL Magazine to promote Eminem's upcoming album, "Relapse" in 2009.
So tell me a little bit more about the book.
Seller: It's a very rare book.
I found it online and it was the only copy.
Not just that, signed by Stan Lee with an inscription.
It's a take on the Spider-Man theme.
It's "With tight flow" because it's Eminem, "comes great responsibility.
" - Stan Lee wrote that? - He did.
[Laughter.]
You'd never see these two guys meet anywhere except in a comic.
And then, you have Eminem, and I'm just a huge fan of him.
Chen: One of the biggest artists of all time.
I have never seen his actual name spelled out.
I didn't realize it was spelled like this.
I thought it was M, the little symbol, and M.
I really thought that's what it was.
No, the M and M comes from his name, - Marshall Matters.
- Flanagan: That's all it means? How many people, though, in the real world when they hear "Eminem" don't think of those cute little candies? Anyone who's aware of the rapper Eminem, I think.
- [Laughter.]
- Come on, man.
I know who the Punisher was, but I had to be, you know, a little bit of schooling on who Eminem was.
On who one of the most popular rappers - in history was.
- [Laughter.]
He's been around for, like, two decades.
Come on, Grandpa.
Chen: Yeah, that guy sold millions of albums.
I'm up to date on my comics, but, you know, not music.
I can't be expected to know everything.
Movies? "10 Mile"? No? Nothin'? "8 Mile," Mike.
[Laughter.]
Pay no attention to him.
He's from, like, you know, the white bread of, like, you know, of, like, Red Bank, New Jersey.
Like, I grew up in Michigan.
You're a Michigan guy like Marshall is.
I love the tradition of, um, musicians appearing in comic books.
Eminem's a huge comic book fan, and he actually said comics got him through rehab.
And he created an alter-ego of Slim Shady, which is kind of like a comic book alter-ego.
Wow.
All right, so you lookin' to sell it today? I am lookin' to sell it.
It's a high grade, 9.
6.
It's very close to almost perfect.
When you see Stan Lee's inscriptions on books, those go for thousands, and those are recycled inscriptions, this being the only one.
Pretty specific to this book - the inscripton.
- Yeah, it is.
What are you lookin' to get for it? Looking for $1,400.
$1,400? Wow.
I, personally, you know, at that price, I probably would have to decline.
All right, so you wouldn't even pick it up for the store? Flanagan: You wanna make a play for it? Are you ask are you asking me permission to make a play for it? - Yeah.
- Flanagan: Go ahead.
Go right ahead.
- Chen: I mean - Flanagan: Let me see your skills.
Are they diminished like your running skills? - No! - Okay, let me see.
Chen: I mean, I'll-I'll admit, this is-this is very rare, I've never seen one, but at that $1,400 is very high.
Would you take $200 for it? Can't do $200.
I-I mean Please? [Laughter.]
Um, could you do something closer to eight? $800? Bring out your Ming Shady, get a little bit nastier now.
Chen: All right, all right, fine.
I'm gonna give you $250 for this, and if you don't like that, then it's not me, it's Ming Shady sayin' it.
Well, to Ming Shady, I would say can we go up to $525? I have gotten better offers than that, I just-I would like you to have it, I'd like to sell it today.
Ming Shady's gonna go up to $275, and that's it.
Take it or leave it.
I'll have to leave it.
I could come down to $500 as my lowest.
[Stammering.]
I can't.
Flanagan: Would that offer of $500 go for somebody who wasn't shady? I think it does.
I'd still like to sell it today.
- 500 bucks? - Seller: $500.
You got it.
Deal.
- Seller: Wow.
- Baby, baby, baby.
- Street.
- Street cred, punk.
Johnson: Gangsta, gangsta.
[Laughter.]
You did all the work for me, man.
Thank you.
Sounds a little bit like the new school was taught by the old school.
Ming might've schooled me on bustin' rhymes, but I schooled him on bustin' deals.
And nuts.
[Laughter.]
Flanagan: You're drawn to the darkness of Spawn.
How come? My soul's dark.
[Giggling.]
- See? That's what it is.
- Let's talk.
Method Man: I was thinkin' maybe if I freestyle for you guys Chen: Like a mini concert? Not only is Method Man a big comic book fan, he's a huge fan of your movies.
- Really?! - Yes.
I was wondering if I can get these signed.
I know guys always come in here, you know, to try to sell you guys stuff, and all that, well, I just want a signature for both of these.
From Kevin and Jay? Kevin and Jay, sure.
We can get that done like that.
[Snaps fingers.]
You look at a guy, Kevin, self-made.
You gotta respect it, you know? What he went through to even get "Clerks" done.
They should teach that in colleges.
"Dogma" really stuck out for me.
Jay did excellent in that movie, alongside Chris Rock.
Johnson: You know, me and Walt were in that movie, too.
I-I didn't see you guys.
In front of the abortion clinic, uh, you'll see two very young, fresh-faced actors protesting in that scene.
Method Man: Oh, whoa, I gotta go back and look now.
Oh, my God.
All right, Ming, secure these somewhere 'til we are able to get Kevin and Jay to sign them.
Chen: No problem.
If you wouldn't mind taggin' that.
Smith: I would love to.
Give me a Sharpie.
Holy cow, man.
He got it from Puzzle Zoo, $14.
95, back in the day, the price is still on there.
Chen: You just made a very happy Method Man.
Now he can finally put it up on eBay.
[Laughter.]
[ Rock music.]
- Woman: Hey, guys, - Flanagan: Hello.
Can I check out that Medieval Spawn statue? Absolutely.
Hey, Ming, can you grab the Medieval Spawn statue along with all the accessories? - Yeah, no problem.
- Thanks.
- Great.
- Big "Spawn" fan? - Huge "Spawn" fan.
- Nice.
- - Isn't she a beauty? Oh, she is hideous! Oh my God, I love it! Flanagan: Hideously beautiful, right? You can tell it's a Todd McFarlane, though, with all the detailing.
Look at that.
That's insane.
Flanagan: You have your COA signed by the legend himself.
Woman: I like how they did that, too.
It's stabbed right into it.
[Giggles.]
Johnson: What is the difference between regular old Spawn and Medieval Spawn? Zapcic: There are many iterations of the Spawn character.
Al Simmons, who died, went to Hell, came back.
He's just, like, one in a long line of Spawns, and this is Medieval Spawn.
Woman: Honestly, I really love the cape, especially the detailing.
Flanagan: Nobody in the history of comic books drew a cape like McFarlane, and so for them to be able to capture that in a 3D sculpture, that's really, really the - the what's that French word? - Epitome? The piece de resistance.
That's what I was goin' for.
You can't even speak English! - [Laughter.]
- Don't worry about French.
Todd McFarlane, if there was gonna be a Mount Rushmore for modern day comic book creators, his face would definitely be up there.
Flanagan: He lined up some of the most all-time great writers in comic book history to follow each other on a string of Spawn issues.
- He just grabbed legends.
- Flanagan: Yeah.
How'd he do that? I dunno, money? [Laughter.]
When the comic came out, it was just unforgiving, like, you know, it was dark.
He goes to Hell, he comes back, and Yeah, he comes back for revenge! You know? With the big, evil demon comin' in, you know, and you have to - The clown? - Oh, I love the clown.
Oh, my God.
Okay, it seems like you're drawn to the the darkness of "Spawn.
" How come? You have to.
My soul's dark.
- See? That's what it is.
- Let's talk.
[Laughter.]
All right, so should we box her up, and, I mean, it's $350.
I really didn't wanna go anything over $300.
[Sighs.]
I'll bring it down to three and-a-quarter, but I know somebody's gonna come in and buy it, so, I mean, I really would have to draw the line there.
I couldn't go any lower.
Well, then it's sold.
I gotta have it before someone else does.
All right, three and-a-quarter.
Awesome, thank you.
[ Funky music.]
Method Man: Ah, there it is.
Flanagan: This is the 1973 Aquaman Mego.
What's the damage gonna be, Walt? Well, I'm getting $400 for it.
Ooh, that's that's kinda steep.
$400 I mean I was thinkin' more along the lines of maybe if I freestyle for you guys - What do you think? - Flanagan: Like a mini concert? Yeah, like-like a private concert, really.
I remember seeing DMC on here, and he said a quick, little rap for you guys, and stuff, and you guys kinda really bit on that.
Well, I'm a little bit better than D.
I think we're witnessing the beginnings of a beef.
[Laughter.]
Method Man: So what do you think, Mr.
Flanagan? All right, you got a deal.
All right, check it.
Yes, I finally made it to the Stash I was like Mike's barber, never made it to the 'stache [Laughter.]
When Bryan gets a haircut, Ming Chen gets a jab and last, but not least, Walt who's trying to get my cash Right? I'm a fan of the show, not to go off-topic but I really came here for that Bluntman and Chronic Right? Before I give you a dime Silent Bob will make a comment All hail the Secret Stash Red Bank's number one home for comics - Aw! - Yeah! [Applause.]
We should've recorded that.
And sold it.
[Overlapping chatter.]
Method Man: Right, right.
See? Guys, thank you so much.
- Thank you.
- Method Man: I gotta go.
Got things to do.
- See ya later.
- The Stash, bitches! [Laughter.]
Oh, protect your neck 'cause it's the end of the show, man.
For "Comic Book Men" I'm Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Kids, remember these immortal words, Wu-Tang Clan ain't nothin' to [Bleep.]
with.
Good night.

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