Robot Chicken s07e04 Episode Script
Rebel Appliance
It's alive! Well, we made it back after our wildest mission yet.
We're Andy's toys forever and always! W-where did you guys come from? Ebay.
Andy ordered us when he couldn't find you.
But we're irreplaceable in Andy's heart! Andy spent exactly $32.
44 to replace all of you, and his heart seems fine.
What the How did this happen? Aw, now I have doubles of everything! Well, might as well keep the new ones and sell the crappier ones on ebay.
What?! I've never heard the voice chip say that before.
- Yeah, I'm a rare variant.
- You, traitor! Oh, that's great! - Wow! $800! - You! I'll get you next time, Gadget! Next ti Tom, what's the wifi password here? - I got disconnected from the network! - "Madcatl.
" That's what I typed, and it didn't all in lowercase.
But the "M" in "mad" and the "C" in "cat" are capitalized.
All right, hold on.
Hold on.
Oh! There it goes.
Thank you, Tom.
Tom is good people.
Is everything okay, Marcie? Not really, dad.
Four years of college, and I still don't know how to talk to boys.
Just tell them what's in your heart.
Like what? What would you say if you liked a girl? Well, I haven't thought about women since your mother passed, but I'll try.
I like you, and I'm wondering if you feel the same.
Cool! Thanks, dad.
Well, then, she'd say, "I'm in my early 20s, but I like older men.
" And then maybe I'd French her young mouth like this.
Oh! Oh, girl who works at Costco, you like things in bulk, don't you? I'm giving you something in bulk, all right.
Oh, y oh, you like getting slapped with my membership card, you dirty slut? Oh, who's your friend? She works checkout? Check out these giant balls, baby.
Two girls, one guy.
I like these odds.
One ball per girl.
Dl-ll-ll-ll-ll-ll-ll-ll! Oh, girls of Costco, yes! Oh, yeah! Oh, girls of Costco! Oh, yeah, girls of Costco! Ohhh! Ahhh! Ah, yeah.
Oh, I'm s I'm sorry.
I got a little carried away.
Can you help me burn my bed? Hey, buddy, spare a credit? Sorry.
Prime directive.
Can't influence your natural path in life.
But I give you permission! I'm sorry.
Bro.
Oh! I should probably clean that up.
But then again, prime directive.
Aaaah! - H-help me! - No! I've already done too much damage to the natural order! Prime directive! Kirk, baby, where are you? You promised you'd meet my parents.
Sorry.
Prime directive.
ICan't let them know of my existence.
Well, then, I guess I can't get that abortion! - Mm.
Sorry I'm late.
- Damn right you're sorry.
What's this about an abortion? Me Walluper hasn't been milked by a Bonnie in a fortnight.
Ah, good old gentle Bessie.
Let me moisten you up a bit down there first.
Ahh Stuart! What in the hell are you doing?! Oh! Aye! Oh, it's it's not what it looks like! No, I was just thinking about, uh, inventing a musical instrument yeah! U-using a sheep's stomach as a as as a bag that you blow you blow right into.
If I had time to properly demonstrate I've got nowhere to be.
Stuart, I'm sorry.
I had no right to jump to conclusions.
Oh, Bessie! Oh, God.
That was the day I killed the two things I loved most in the world, my beautiful Bessie and music.
I'd also killed music.
No! Defeated by rainbow brite and her gay rainbow powers! Hey! We don't use "gay" as a pejorative in rainbow land! A pejor no! No! I'm just saying you're using your gay rainbow on me.
And who says the rainbow is gay? Gay people! It's the symbol of their culture! They make flags! You know an awful lot about it.
Yeah! I'm gay! Is that a problem? 'Course not! I just had no idea.
Did you know, twink? I'm gonna leave that "twink" thing on the table.
All I was saying is that your entire operation is very, very gay, and that's great.
I hope we're at a place in our culture where we can call something gay and it's not the end of the world, because there's nothing wrong with being gay.
I'm glad we had this talk.
Hey! What the You just start blasting at me again, you homophobe?! That Ostrich is skiing! Huh.
And now back to Nickelodeon's "the secret world of Alex Mack.
" And your prom queen is Alex Mack.
You have messed with the wrong girl, because I have the power of telekinesis! Is there a draft in here or something? Oh, that's cool.
Take a picture of me with the floating table! I can also morph into a puddle.
I should clean up this spill here.
- Walter, watch out! - Ow! I-I'm fine.
I'm fine.
I just I bruised my elbow.
Now I'm really upset! - What are you doing? - Nothing.
- I just glow when I'm upset.
- Oh.
Ugh! You're right I suck! The only other power I have is shooting electricity out of my fingers.
Wait you can shoot electricity out of your fingers? Probably should have led with that.
We implanted two intracortical Microelectrodes into your brain's motor cortex, which controls limb movement.
The integration process won't take long.
Hey, do not jerk off with it.
Well, then, I don't want it.
My fellow Thundercats, when danger is near, I shall hold the sword of omens aloft, - and yell out a battle cry.
- And what shall our battle cry be, Lion-o? I shall hold the sword aloft now and see what comes to me.
Thunder Thunder Thunder Thundercats I need you because evil is near and we are friends and we are a team, so we must come together, and fight because the Eye of Thundera is in the sky, and it is summoning everyone together, so please come here.
Panthro and Tygra and Panthro and also Cheetara and also.
Wilykit and Wilykat and also Snarf.
I think I said "Panthro" twice.
I won't do that every time.
Yes, we are the Thundercats! This is our battle cry! I love you guys! You are my best friends, and I am Lion-o, and I am a Thundercat, and you guys are Thundercats, too.
Mumm-ra is not a Thundercat.
He is bad, and we are gonna win against him because we are the Thundercats, and the Thundercats are here for you today because we are the Thundercats.
Yeah! I'm Lion-o.
I hope you guys wrote that down.
I liked it.
Aah! Blagh! Eugggh! This pie's terrible! What's in it?! The last Hobo who trespassed in my yard.
And now the cycle begins anew.
Oh, boy.
I wish I was a Dothraki.
That would be so cool! Soooo cool Oh, boy! I'm a Dothraki! I might have to work a few crunches into my schedule.
I look like a holocaust survivor.
Wow! It's Khal Drogo! Uhhhhh enuk chuk? But I'm not a girl! I'm a brave warrior! Guhhhhhhhhh It's not TV.
It's HBO.
My sun and stars treats me like a dog in bed.
I need to earn his respect before I'm truly a queen.
Girlfriend, you got to take control of that man.
First, you need to And then you just right inside his The orgasm of the noble savage.
A beautiful sound.
Aaaaaaagh! I think I broke his dick! You broke his dick?! You broke his dick! I broke his dick! You broke his dick! I broke his dick! I did everything you said! Okay, full disclosure I don't know how sex works.
Aaaaah! Oh, boy, this job is way better! I get to squire for King Robert! So, what are we doing today? This is a boar hunt, you idiot.
Wow! A boar hunt?! That sounds fun! This is gonna be great.
Robert needs his sword.
Good God, the King needs his sword! Huh? Aaaaaaaaah! Oh, my God! Okay, new job.
New job.
Just don't mess this one up.
- So, I just stand here holding this basket? - Silence, fool! The new King is speaking.
Eddard Stark, for the crime of treason, you are sentenced to death.
Psst! This is you, fool.
Get in there! Yay! I'm on! Hi, Sean bean.
You were awesome in "Lord of the rings.
" "One does not simply walk into mordor.
" That's a classic! Aah! Aaah! Oh, gosh.
I'm sorry.
Sorry! Oh, no! Aaaaaaah! Wow! You're Arya Stark! Don't cry.
Arya, this is your father talking.
You must be brave now.
Aaaaah! I like this guy.
Oh, man, that was way less cool than I thought.
But I did get to see the Khaleesi naked.
Ahhhhh! Ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk Ba-gawk! Bawk.
We're Andy's toys forever and always! W-where did you guys come from? Ebay.
Andy ordered us when he couldn't find you.
But we're irreplaceable in Andy's heart! Andy spent exactly $32.
44 to replace all of you, and his heart seems fine.
What the How did this happen? Aw, now I have doubles of everything! Well, might as well keep the new ones and sell the crappier ones on ebay.
What?! I've never heard the voice chip say that before.
- Yeah, I'm a rare variant.
- You, traitor! Oh, that's great! - Wow! $800! - You! I'll get you next time, Gadget! Next ti Tom, what's the wifi password here? - I got disconnected from the network! - "Madcatl.
" That's what I typed, and it didn't all in lowercase.
But the "M" in "mad" and the "C" in "cat" are capitalized.
All right, hold on.
Hold on.
Oh! There it goes.
Thank you, Tom.
Tom is good people.
Is everything okay, Marcie? Not really, dad.
Four years of college, and I still don't know how to talk to boys.
Just tell them what's in your heart.
Like what? What would you say if you liked a girl? Well, I haven't thought about women since your mother passed, but I'll try.
I like you, and I'm wondering if you feel the same.
Cool! Thanks, dad.
Well, then, she'd say, "I'm in my early 20s, but I like older men.
" And then maybe I'd French her young mouth like this.
Oh! Oh, girl who works at Costco, you like things in bulk, don't you? I'm giving you something in bulk, all right.
Oh, y oh, you like getting slapped with my membership card, you dirty slut? Oh, who's your friend? She works checkout? Check out these giant balls, baby.
Two girls, one guy.
I like these odds.
One ball per girl.
Dl-ll-ll-ll-ll-ll-ll-ll! Oh, girls of Costco, yes! Oh, yeah! Oh, girls of Costco! Oh, yeah, girls of Costco! Ohhh! Ahhh! Ah, yeah.
Oh, I'm s I'm sorry.
I got a little carried away.
Can you help me burn my bed? Hey, buddy, spare a credit? Sorry.
Prime directive.
Can't influence your natural path in life.
But I give you permission! I'm sorry.
Bro.
Oh! I should probably clean that up.
But then again, prime directive.
Aaaah! - H-help me! - No! I've already done too much damage to the natural order! Prime directive! Kirk, baby, where are you? You promised you'd meet my parents.
Sorry.
Prime directive.
ICan't let them know of my existence.
Well, then, I guess I can't get that abortion! - Mm.
Sorry I'm late.
- Damn right you're sorry.
What's this about an abortion? Me Walluper hasn't been milked by a Bonnie in a fortnight.
Ah, good old gentle Bessie.
Let me moisten you up a bit down there first.
Ahh Stuart! What in the hell are you doing?! Oh! Aye! Oh, it's it's not what it looks like! No, I was just thinking about, uh, inventing a musical instrument yeah! U-using a sheep's stomach as a as as a bag that you blow you blow right into.
If I had time to properly demonstrate I've got nowhere to be.
Stuart, I'm sorry.
I had no right to jump to conclusions.
Oh, Bessie! Oh, God.
That was the day I killed the two things I loved most in the world, my beautiful Bessie and music.
I'd also killed music.
No! Defeated by rainbow brite and her gay rainbow powers! Hey! We don't use "gay" as a pejorative in rainbow land! A pejor no! No! I'm just saying you're using your gay rainbow on me.
And who says the rainbow is gay? Gay people! It's the symbol of their culture! They make flags! You know an awful lot about it.
Yeah! I'm gay! Is that a problem? 'Course not! I just had no idea.
Did you know, twink? I'm gonna leave that "twink" thing on the table.
All I was saying is that your entire operation is very, very gay, and that's great.
I hope we're at a place in our culture where we can call something gay and it's not the end of the world, because there's nothing wrong with being gay.
I'm glad we had this talk.
Hey! What the You just start blasting at me again, you homophobe?! That Ostrich is skiing! Huh.
And now back to Nickelodeon's "the secret world of Alex Mack.
" And your prom queen is Alex Mack.
You have messed with the wrong girl, because I have the power of telekinesis! Is there a draft in here or something? Oh, that's cool.
Take a picture of me with the floating table! I can also morph into a puddle.
I should clean up this spill here.
- Walter, watch out! - Ow! I-I'm fine.
I'm fine.
I just I bruised my elbow.
Now I'm really upset! - What are you doing? - Nothing.
- I just glow when I'm upset.
- Oh.
Ugh! You're right I suck! The only other power I have is shooting electricity out of my fingers.
Wait you can shoot electricity out of your fingers? Probably should have led with that.
We implanted two intracortical Microelectrodes into your brain's motor cortex, which controls limb movement.
The integration process won't take long.
Hey, do not jerk off with it.
Well, then, I don't want it.
My fellow Thundercats, when danger is near, I shall hold the sword of omens aloft, - and yell out a battle cry.
- And what shall our battle cry be, Lion-o? I shall hold the sword aloft now and see what comes to me.
Thunder Thunder Thunder Thundercats I need you because evil is near and we are friends and we are a team, so we must come together, and fight because the Eye of Thundera is in the sky, and it is summoning everyone together, so please come here.
Panthro and Tygra and Panthro and also Cheetara and also.
Wilykit and Wilykat and also Snarf.
I think I said "Panthro" twice.
I won't do that every time.
Yes, we are the Thundercats! This is our battle cry! I love you guys! You are my best friends, and I am Lion-o, and I am a Thundercat, and you guys are Thundercats, too.
Mumm-ra is not a Thundercat.
He is bad, and we are gonna win against him because we are the Thundercats, and the Thundercats are here for you today because we are the Thundercats.
Yeah! I'm Lion-o.
I hope you guys wrote that down.
I liked it.
Aah! Blagh! Eugggh! This pie's terrible! What's in it?! The last Hobo who trespassed in my yard.
And now the cycle begins anew.
Oh, boy.
I wish I was a Dothraki.
That would be so cool! Soooo cool Oh, boy! I'm a Dothraki! I might have to work a few crunches into my schedule.
I look like a holocaust survivor.
Wow! It's Khal Drogo! Uhhhhh enuk chuk? But I'm not a girl! I'm a brave warrior! Guhhhhhhhhh It's not TV.
It's HBO.
My sun and stars treats me like a dog in bed.
I need to earn his respect before I'm truly a queen.
Girlfriend, you got to take control of that man.
First, you need to And then you just right inside his The orgasm of the noble savage.
A beautiful sound.
Aaaaaaagh! I think I broke his dick! You broke his dick?! You broke his dick! I broke his dick! You broke his dick! I broke his dick! I did everything you said! Okay, full disclosure I don't know how sex works.
Aaaaah! Oh, boy, this job is way better! I get to squire for King Robert! So, what are we doing today? This is a boar hunt, you idiot.
Wow! A boar hunt?! That sounds fun! This is gonna be great.
Robert needs his sword.
Good God, the King needs his sword! Huh? Aaaaaaaaah! Oh, my God! Okay, new job.
New job.
Just don't mess this one up.
- So, I just stand here holding this basket? - Silence, fool! The new King is speaking.
Eddard Stark, for the crime of treason, you are sentenced to death.
Psst! This is you, fool.
Get in there! Yay! I'm on! Hi, Sean bean.
You were awesome in "Lord of the rings.
" "One does not simply walk into mordor.
" That's a classic! Aah! Aaah! Oh, gosh.
I'm sorry.
Sorry! Oh, no! Aaaaaaah! Wow! You're Arya Stark! Don't cry.
Arya, this is your father talking.
You must be brave now.
Aaaaah! I like this guy.
Oh, man, that was way less cool than I thought.
But I did get to see the Khaleesi naked.
Ahhhhh! Ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk Ba-gawk! Bawk.