Will and Grace s07e10 Episode Script
Queens for a Day
-Are we late? -Did we miss breakfast? The guy hasn't even taken my order yet Ugh, unbelievable I don't know what's happened to the work ethic in this country Don't you have a job to be at? I promised myself I wouldn't repeat outfits So, uh, until I go shopping again I'm not going back Oh, I'm so hungry I am this close to actually getting up and pouring myself a glass of juice Hey, hey, hey! don't talk crazy I'm starving too but we're not gonna feed ourselves like a fat family on a camping trip And, when you pour your own glass of juice you are taking a job away from someone who came to this country in a crate or an innertube This is torture Can we talk about something besides food? Okay This is a little embarrassing but I had the weirdest dream last night Oh, honey is it the one where you're wearing sweats that make you look like a large formless piece of clay? 'Cause that ain't no dream Sorry, I don't look my best I guess unlike you I didn't take my head out of a hat box and staple it to my neck Anyway, no it's a recurring dream I keep having it over and over and over and over I see Is this the first time you've had it? That's a good question, Jack Okay, anyway.
In my dream I'm on the subway completely naked And then, all of a sudden that hot gardener from "Desperate Housewives" gets on and he puts his hand on my breast Then that hot smart guy from "Jeopardy!" gets on and puts his hand on my other breast Then that hot Korean guy from "Lost" gets on and puts his hand on my other breast Oh, yeah, in this dream I have three breasts I see Well, I would say that dream represents your fear of dentists Perhaps I'm just saying that because my dentist is hot, smart, and Korean And, for all I know tri-breasted I think I just need to have sex Honey, you know, you and I are going through the same exact thing I haven't had sex in a while either We just need to get back on the horse Or, better yet get back on the man I can't take it anymore I'm so hungry I'm gonna have one of these pumpkin candies Now I'll have to call Dr.
Hung Okay, you know what? This is just rude And if there is one thing I cannot abide, it is rudeness! Hey, homo we're hungry out here! Here's an idea.
How about three big bowls of "Get-out-io's"? There's sugar on one side and I'm not your damn cook on the other! I'd like mine with bananas, please I don't have time to make breakfast today I'm meeting Vince's mom But we're all going over there for Thanksgiving in two days Why don't you just meet her then? I need a head start Vince says she's a tough cookie Oh, that doesn't sound so bad Yeah, what he actually said was that she's already decided to hate me and good luck Well, that doesn't sound so bad Apparently she's never liked any of his boyfriends So I'm gonna take her for a day of shopping You know, give her a whole pretty woman makeover Without spending more than $100 Where're you taking her shopping? Flint, Michigan? Well, I just--I want to get to know her, ya know So I can tell her how honored I am to meet her and how much it means to me to become part of her family You know, just generally blow a bunch of smoke up her fat ass Honey, you know what else is fun? Blowing smoke into a dog's mouth Àª & ±×·¹À̽º Will & Grace 7x10, 11 Queens for a Day ÀÚ¸·Á¦ÀÛ - ³×ÀÌÆ® µå ó¸ 24 ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Will & Grace ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Á °ÇºÎ ¹èÆ÷ / ¼öÁ¤±ÝÁö ¹èÆ÷½Ã ÀÚ¸· Ãâó¸¦ ²À ¹àÇôÁÖ¼¼¿ä Where's that waiter? I'm so hungry I knew I shouldn't have given my Powerbar to that homeless woman I tried to get it back, but her kid was just grippin' it too tightly Service here always stinks How come this place got such a good write-up in the Fagot's Guide? (fogot È£¸ðº¸´Ù ÇÑÂü ´õ ºñÇÏÀûÀÎ ¸») Honey, it's pronounced "fa-GATZ.
" Actually, fools it's Zagat's Uh, not this one It rates restaurants based on cuteness of the wait staff You see here This one got five smiley butts Speakin' of butts had another sex dream last night This time I was in the shower with Barack Obama Oh-bama he was ba-rocking my world Well, you better do it soon You know what they say If you don't use it it'll fall off What exactly will fall off? I don't know.
I don't know what you guys have down there Oh, honey let me explain Imagine the most beautiful flower you've ever seen Its petals opening as it's gently touched by the sun Now imagine a vagina next to it See, even that made me horny Where is that stupid waiter? You just know that idiot got all our orders mixed up Well, here comes the swarthy immigrant now Don't think you're gettin' a tip Oh, that's okay Just the privilege of ordering it paying for it, and hauling it over here is reward enough Ooh, sassy waiters just like the guide promised Well, it's official My mother's toe's broken -Oh, no -What happened? Didn`t he tell you? Uh, I thought I did.
Ya know we went shopping.
And she-- she fell.
It was nothing It was no big deal, you know Certainly no one's fault "No one's fault"? He pressured her into trying on these four-inch hooker heels And then he told her to "work it, girl.
" Okay, in hindsight maybe it wasn't a good idea to make her climb up on the display case and shake her "groove thang," but you know She was having fun up until the time that she fell, and her skirt hiked up and she showed her groove thang to the whole store Well, she sounds like a ball of fun I can't wait to meet her tomorrow She's a hooker, you say? Well, you can all forget about it You can forget it because Thanksgiving's cancelled Why, does she cook with her feet? This is gonna be the first Thanksgiving we're not together as a family since we came over on the Mayflower Mayflower Movers Before Queens, we lived in Bayonne.
' Great.
No sex and now no turkey Either way no stuffin' for you Hang on What about if you and I cook Thanksgiving? We can do the whole thing at your mother's house She wouldn't have to lift a finger Of course she won't she cooks with her feet I don't know.
My mom likes Thanksgiving to be just so She's not too thrilled with you right now, you know You could be setting yourself up for a disaster Or am I setting myself up to be a hero? Pa, who's that handsome stranger who saved Thanksgiving? Well, Ma, I reckon it's our son's boyfriend Yeah, I live in Flushing not the oddly tolerant Ozarks Trust me, by the end of the evening she'll not only have forgiven me she'll be thankin' me All right let's give it a shot Hey, don't worry Will is known for his perfect Thanksgivings Except the one where he proposed to me told me he was gay, and then snuck out in the middle of the night while I was sobbing in bed But I hardly ever think about that one What a cute neighborhood I always thought Queens was just a place to bury bodies or buy discount meat Queens gets a bad rap It doesn't help that we got a town called Flushing (Ç÷¯½Ì: ¼ö¼¼½Ä) - Makes you think of poop - Yeah, I got it Well, so this is it, huh? Family kitchen I bet there's a lot of history here Yeah, sure is Right there That's the spot my uncle got shot And, uhThat's where I was standing when I accidentally shot my uncle Whereas I was thinking less along the lines of bloodshed and more along the lines of pasta dinners Yeah, don't say "whereas" in front of my mom She already thinks you're a preening sadistic boob I'm paraphrasing Don't you worry Whatever she dishes out I can take Today I have the patience of a saint And, from looking around the room I have plenty to choose from - Vinnie.
- Hey, Ro.
Ro, this is Will Will, this is my sister Ro - Nice to meet you.
- You too.
He's pretty.
put a mustache on him he's cousin Gina Thank you And congratulations I hear you're getting married.
That's great Yeah, Matt's an amazing guy He went to summer camp with Renee Zellweger But that's not the only reason I'm marrying him Wow, sounds fascinating Can't wait to meet him Is that my Vinnie? Oh, now that's my dad Listen, don't let him get to you He can be a real S.
O.
B.
Okay? -And there he is -I thought I heard someone in our kitchen - Hey, honey - Hi, Annette Good to see you up and around What a very stylish cane.
It suits you Would you like me to climb up on the counter so you can take a better look at it? I'm glad we can all laugh about it 'Cause 'cause it's the best medicine Vince, you gonna introduce me? See how he starts right in? Yeah, I know I'm rude and you're disappointed, Dad I'm Will.
Nice to meet you, Paul I'm so sorry about your wife's toe Ah, it happens One time I was reaching for the grated cheese and I broke her jaw You look good, Vince See it? It's just one dig after another Yeah, he's merciless Listen, Annette Vince gave me all of your recipes and I want you to know I'm gonna cook everything just the way you do No, you're not I woulda cooked it with two good feet Hey, you made it! Barely You told us to look for the house with the El Dorado parked out front There's, like Happy Thanksgiving, William You missed all the drama at the parade today Underdog got loose and mounted Bart Simpson So, I guess, really his name should be Topdog it smells so good in here For God's sake, Grace don't draw attention to your nose Now, remember, everything you do here tonight is a reflection on me I understand completely, Will Your large shiny forehead needs some powder I, on the other hand look fantastic Hey, don't hog the forehead! Stop it you bat Look, just try to be friendly Get to know people - Talk me up, mingle - All right, all right Which one of them did you say had the little problem with OxyContin? Oh, that'd be me Let's get to know each other How's it goin'? Vince's mother is still riding me about the toe I don't even think it was broken I mean, half the foot was bunion The mall paramedics almost threw up when they saw it Don't worry about the mom I am here to make you look good And I'm not gonna leave your side until I do - Hey - Hey Hey, Uncle Paul the El Dorado's fixed! I'm gonna go shower -Thanks, Grace.
It would be great -Buzz off, there's a hot guy here What are you doing? I told you to mingle Grace took the guy I wanted to mingle with Well, mingle with Vince's sister Ro She's a teacher She has a condo in Astoria - She's getting married - Oh, yay.
Lemon, lemon, lemon I win a dull night Annette, can I get you a chair? No.
It's better I stand get used to the pain Annette, you make passive aggressive so adorable ¼Ò±ØÀû °ø°Ý: È®¿¬È÷ °ø°ÝÇÏÁø ¾ÊÀ¸¸é¼µµ ¾î ²½ÄÀ¸·Îµç ºÒÆíÇÔÀ» Ç¥ÇöÇÏ´Â ¹æ½Ä) I'm gettin' a beer You want me to grab you one? Yeah, Dad, I drink That's why I haven't made detective That's it I can't take it anymore - I'm gonna confront him - No, no, not tonight, you're not.
I have to I'm angry And anger is the number one enemy of the hair follicle I will not lose my hair for that man Look.
You are not making any scenes tonight You've put up with that man's imaginary taunts for years now You can last one more day Besides, if anything goes wrong tonight Mussolini in the blonde rinse is gonna blame it all on me Fine.
Let me just.
.
No one's jumpin' ship yet.
I'll wait Karen, the most incredible thing just happened to me You found something in this living room worth more than 20 bucks? No, no, I met the hottest guy -Hey -Hey Oh, honey, him? Oh, he's cute You should do him I can't, that's so inappropriate and where? Anywhere.
For God's sake half the house is covered in plastic How would I even do it? All right, Grace imagine the most beautiful flower you've ever seen - Its petals opening - Karen, I know how to do it I just don't know how to make it happen It's been a long time You're rusty, huh? The old whore is rusty All right, well, honey you want me to go talk to him? No, you can't that's so inappropriate, and when? As soon as this generic OxyContin wears off It won't be long I'm starting to get the feeling back in my tongue Hello, Ro Her-ro I'm Jack Will's friend Not like Will and your brother are "friends".
Okay? You know one day they'll eventually be "roommates".
And then the proud parents of a Chinese girl I know my brother's gay I've known it since he beat up some guy in high school when he said Lee Majors looked dopey Ah, yes Who hasn't had that fight? All right mingle me this Are you nervous about your wedding? Kind of 'cause I'm a lesbian A lesbo says what? I am sorry to dump that on you but this has been eating me up I had to tell someone what about your brother? He's gayish It seemed easier to do it with a stranger with a sweet face Oh, it is you just gotta know right parks Oh, you mean me! Oh, I'm sorry I'm so sorry What am I gonna do? I can't get married The thought of my fiance's touch sickens me I'm a lesbian I'm a lesbian! Oh, my God it feels so good to say it out loud - Hey, babe - Hi, honey! It's hard to pull off an Italian Thanksging I got a lot of bocce balls in the air (º¸Ä¡: ÀÌÅ»¸®¾Æ½Ä º¼¸µ ºñ½ÁÇÑ °Í, ball in the air¸¦ ºñƲ¾î¼ ÀÌÅ»¸®¾Æ½ÄÀÇ ÇØ°áÇؾßÇÒ ¹®Á¦°¡ ¸¹´Ù´Â æ) How's it going? Good, good.
does my bra look stuffed? - No - Damn, I just stuffed it What is Karen doing over there? God, I hope she's playing it cool Hey, cannoli see that hamantash over there? (Ä«³î¸®´Â ÀÌÅ»¸®¾Æ, ÇϸÕŸ½¬´Â À¯ÅÂÀÎ °úÀÚ ¹Ð°¡·ç·Î ¸¸µé°í ¼Ó¿¡ ´ÞÄÞÇÑ °Ô µé¾î ÀÖ´Â Á¡ÀÌ ºñ½ÁÇÔ) How'd you like to hit that? So sweetie, I'll go get you a drink and I'll be right back Thanks, babe God, I hate him A nice guy, but.
I can't get through sex with him without pretending he's Renee Zellweger I met her once Matt went to camp with her It's the only reason I'm marrying him Yeah, okay Listen.
Ro - Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.
Wanna hold my hand? I'm not a therapist though I do own a monocle, but it seems to me perhaps you should not marry him But I have to My parents have been dreaming about my wedding forever It'll kill them to know that their only girl loves only girls Whoa, what are you talking about? Your parents have done everything right They raised all their kids gay Why would they not accept you? It's different with Vince He's a guy, and we're Italian All Italian guys are gay That's because the country's shaped like a thigh-high boot Look, you're the only person who knows so please don't tell anyone Well, I won't but you have to, Ro And this is the perfect opportunity.
Thanksgiving celebrates the day the girl Indians first introduced the girl pilgrims to sex Yeah, they called it "maize".
Because lesbian sex is very confusing and if you're not careful one can lose their way So you're saying I should come out today? Yes! At dinner You can wave a turkey leg for emphasis - Hey - Hey - I'm Sal - Grace.
- So you wanna see the garage? - Yeah Don't do that! That's Kinda how I shot my uncle Oh.
I'm gonna throw 'em out and start again Don't worry about it This is Queens Three second rule's like a three day rule (¹¹µç 3ÃÊ ³»¿¡ ÇÏ¸é ¿ë¼ µÈ´Ù´Â ¹ýÄ¢) No, no, no I'm gonna throw them out Your mom will know She's a witch I mean, she's darling Why are you doing this to yourself? Look.
You're important to me And.
.
Your family is important to you and what kind of future are we gonna have together if if I'm not accepted here? That's sweet But, Will, I really think you're reading way too much into everything my mother says Hey, there you are Vinnie boy you wanna go downstairs and get the leaf for the dining room table? We can't do it together? Would it kill you to spend some time with me?! You shouldn't do that That's kinda how Vince shot his uncle Annette I had the feeling our paths would cross again Why are you talking like that? I don't know it just seemed appropriate the way you appeared out of the mist like a Nazi soldier You seem nervous, Will Like maybe you think you gotta impress me or something - I don't? - No, you do You know, this family's got a lot of happy occasions coming up Christmas, New Year's Ro's wedding You think you're gonna be here for all of 'em? I'd like to think I am And I'd like to think I'm gonna dance again I know one thing for sure By the end of the night you're gonna love me I doubt it I've yet to meet a man who's good enough for my son Believe me, it would have to be one hell of a perfect evening for me to feel that way about you -Is that a challenge, Annette? -It might be Then meet me on the airfield with the letters of transit.
Come alone I don't know what the hell that was but I don't like it! I thought we were doing a thing! Oh, damn it! Oh, God There you are I've been looking all over for you This two-bedroom attached house is like a Rubik's Cube (·çºò½º Å¥ºê: Á¤À°¸éü »öÀ» ¸ÂÃß´Â ÆÛÁñ) How's it going out there? Great! Big news The wedding's off Ro is a lesbian and she's gonna tell everybody at dinnertonight If you never told me to talk to her I woulda never convinced her to come out today But don't worry, buddy I'll give you all the credit Jack, she cannot come out tonight! Because if she does, her mother is somehow gonna blame it on me This has to be the perfect dinner and I'm not gonna let you or any other lesbian ruin it Will, don't be so insensitive Put yourself in her Birkenstocks Look, I think it's great that she wants to come out I'm sure she has all the makings of a wonderful lesbian and she's going to make a bunch of cats a fine mother someday But not today Today is my day! Wildred Pierce! (¹Ðµå·¹µå ÇǾ: ¸Í¸ñÀûÀÌ°í ¼º°øÁöÇâÀûÀ̾ú´ø ¿µÈ¿Í ¼Ò¼³ÀÇ Ä³¸¯ÅÍ) I am ashamed of you! And not just because your hands are out of proportion to the rest of your body This is one of the hardest things for a gay person to do and being a lesbian is very close to being a gay person You made me come out to my mother on Thanksgiving It was the best decision of my life Why would you wanna deny her that? You're right She should come out whenever she's ready I'm being selfish - Where is she? - Watching football Of course she is Karen.
I did it You put lipstick on all the Virgin Marys around the house? No, no, not yet -Hey -Hey I made out with him It was so hot! And his tongue was everywhere I swear he tried to unhook my bra with it Honey, I can roll dice with my tongue Karen, you were so right It was just what I needed You should really take your own advice one of these days and get back in there No, honey that's not for me I mean, I know I talk a good game, but well I guess I can tell ya Grace, I'm a virgin I've never even seen a man's tenders Actually, I'm up to 1,400 Hey, Ro.
Listen, Jack told me all about what you told him and I just want you to know I couldn't be happier What? He told you? Oh no no! Only because he knows how supportive and sensitive I am Oh, thank you Keeping it in has been such a struggle.
.
Yeah.
I'm talking Look-- I just want you to be absolutely sure You may not be a lesbian I mean, everybody fantasizes about Angelina Jolie Yeah, I told my trainer I want her stomach - Hello? - I'm sorry I got distracted when you mentioned Angelina Jolie I kept picturing her with Renee Could you imagine if they went to the same camp? Okay, you are a lesbian Congratulations and--and welcome But, um-- Do you.
do you need to come out today? Well, Jack told me that's what Thanksgiving is for Oh, Jack No, dear.
No Thanksgiving is traditionally when gay men come out Lesbians come out at Christmas I think it has something to do with all the bulky sweaters (¹Ì±¹¿¡´Â ÀüÅëÀûÀ¸·Î Å©¸®½º¸ ½º¿¡ ÀÔ´Â Ã̽º·¯¿î ÅÐ ½º¿þÅÍ°¡ ÀÖ´Ù°í ÇÔ) Well, that does make sense Plus, I like the whole message of Christmas You know, that a woman can have a baby without a man So.
Ro and Matt they're getting married at Saint Mel's Oh, Saint Mel's My favorite saint I love the way he used to boss around Alice (ÀèÀº "¾Ù¸®½º" ó´Â 7-80³â´ë ½ÃÆ®ÄÞ¿¡ ³ª¿À´Â '¸á' ¾ê±â¸¦ ÇÏ°í ÀÖÀ½) Hey, Dad Dallas score yet? I don't know I wasn't really paying attention To the game or to my life, Dad? Oh, man I got jumpers Hey, Jack.
Listen, you've been here Is it just me or is my dad weird to me? Oh, my God he's a monster! Thank you Thank you I thought it was.
I thought it was all in my mind.
Yeah, which one is he again? Hi, honey Karen, why are you all - Hey - Hey - Here's your dice back - Hey! Oh, yeah What did you do? Oh, honey you were right That was just what I needed Oh, that hunky spaghetti jockey chewed my ear like he was at an all you-can-eat calamari bar How could you? What? You told me to Not with my guy!! Well, honey I didn't plan it After I pulled his shirt off we had nothing left to talk about - Hey, Vince - What are you smiling about? Nothing -Hey -Hey Hey!! Just got his learner's permit Thinks he's the coolest - I'm so into him - Yeah? Well, I'm double into him - Well, I'm gonna ask him out - I'm gonna ask him to move in He gave me a hickey He gave me a child I am pregnant, Grace! No, you're not You can't get pregnant from kissing Oh, thank God! Look, I am not sharing him with you I think that Sal is serious relationship material Dude, I just macked on two old ladies I might need to borrow your dad's shed later Baby cousin Sal is such a good little host He gave Grace a tour of my bedroom Now he's giving it to Karen Yeah.
I had a peek at it before When did your mom turn it into a sewing room? She didn't It's exactly how I left it That's my old Singer and my old sewing trophies How's everything going in here? Don't mind me I'm just getting some ice for my injury You know we usually eat at 4:00.
It's ten 'til Don't you worry everything's gonna be perfect Who you trying to convince? Me or you? Man, if she were my mom I'd have sewn myself a noose Oh, Ro, I'm so excited you're coming out tonight You're finding yourself You're growing up It's like a lesbian Judy Blume book Are you there, God? It's me, Marge!" (ÁÖµð ºí·ë ºÏ ½Ã¸®Áî Áß Çϳª: ÇÑ ¼Ò³à°¡ ÀÚ½ÅÀÇ Á¤Ã¼¼ºÀ» ã¾Æ°¡´Â ³»¿ë) Yeah, I'm not doing it tonight I decided to wait until Christmas What? No! You have to It was Will, wasn't it? He got to you with his devilish charm and those piercing eyes and occasional touch you never know what it means Ah, Will.
It just seemed to make sense to wait Plus Matt has his camp reunion the first week in December and there's a rumor Renee Zellweger may show up Have you seen her as a brunette? But if you do it now, you'll get Christmas presents that you can actually use Like a chunky diving watch Or a little camera you can make documentaries with I do have an idea for a short on female iron workers I have just the Ani DiFranco song to play over the credits (Æä¹Ì´ÏÁòÀû ¼ºÇâÀÌ °ÇÑ ¿©°¡¼ö) There you go See, it's not healthy to keep something like that bottled up It's not fair to you or Matt You're right.
I have to tell them Thank you Has anyone ever told you you're a very wise man? No, they have not Gin We've been playing poker Then poker Look at him Just sitting there eating his peanuts like he wishes I was never even born Funny, he just looks like a man eating peanuts to me Hey, Vince Does this color look okay to you? I dunno I guess it looks kinda red You're right I am? Thank you for validating me, Daddy I love you I love you too No, it's not red it's green! Karen, this is crazy It's the holidays I don't wanna be fighting over a guy with you Honey, I don't either - Truce? - Of course Hey, free seat by me Outta the way, skank - Hey - Hey Darling, I'm gonna back you up Just a smidge - Hey - Hey You know, I think it's hot when grown men are still into comic books I think it's hot that you call me "mrs" - Would you like some wine? - Sure! How 'bout something from the bar? Oh, nice! Hey, can I take some for my buddies? Sal, what the hell are you doing? These ladies said I could, Ma "Ma"? What the hell are you doing giving alcohol to a 16-year-old? Angie? Angie? Nana, what are you doing in the middle of the floor? You still trying to get to that piano? All right, all right I'll put you by it But you're gonna miss dinner again Okay, five minutes to dinner, everybody! Your little friends were causing a commotion over there I hope that there's not any kind of problem Problem? Only if having too much fun is a problem Is there some kinda problem here?! Well, it depends Karen and I made out with Vince's 16-year-old cousin You're the lawyer You tell me Oh, my God This is a nightmare! Or in your case a dream come true Okay, okay.
Nobody can find out Don't tell anybody - I'm not telling anyone - I'm not telling anyone Oh, I'm telling everyone! I've been emailing pictures of it from my camera phone for the last half hour You said those were just for you Okay, Sal? How about this? If you keep your mouth shut 'til tomorrow I'll let you touch that girl's boobs again before she leaves -Which boobs? -Which ones do you want? -The big ones -Done Good Crisis averted Okay, everyone! Ro has an announcement she'd like to make Oh, for God's sake And, uh, well, not to tip anything but "lez" all be quiet.
Hey, could I just borrow Ro for a second? Are you trying to steal my girl? Oh, I don't think I could Look, I know how important this announcement is to you Again, congratulations and welcome You'll be receiving your kit in a few weeks But if you can keep your mouth shut until tomorrow I'll let you touch that girl's boobs before she leaves -Which boobs? -Which ones do you want? -The smaller ones -Done Come on, what's the announcement, pumpkin? I just wanna say how much I love my fiance Oh, that is so sweet Oh, please don't Don't touch me Oh, Vince the table looks terrific! Thanks.
And the turkey smells great It cut like butter Turkey-shaped butter Yeah.
You're gonna give someone a perfect Thanksgiving you gotta cook a nice moist turkey And I did Well, me and a little friend I like to call the aluminum foil tent If you really want it to go well you gotta make your own scented candles Which I did Well, with a little help from a couple friends I like to call hand-grated cinnamon and vanilla extract It's so good we found each other We are one hot couple Vincent D'Angelo lace up your tap shoes It's show time - Dinner's ready! - Whoa-ho, look at that! Boy, did you cut it close Or, did I time it just perfectly? Now, Annette, I know how much you like dark meat - so I've saved you a drumstick - Yeah, did you tear all the ligaments in that too? That's funny I do enjoy our give and take -Oh, Sal, get your hands off me -I'm not touching you No, he's touching me, honey -Well, then, who's touching -Sorry, I dropped my napkin Up my skirt? All right, all right, everybody Now listen Usually, every year, it's traditional I give the toast on Thanksgiving, but being that Will did such a wonderful job preparing the meal I think it's only right that he should do it Oh, thank you, Paul Look all All Vincent and I wanted was for this warm wonderful family toto be together -Turkey's a little dry.
-No, it isn't Because, when you get right down to it what is a perfect Thanksgiving? -Instant potatoes? -No, they're fresh It's not about Pilgrims or food, or football Or salad forks 'cause I don't got one It's about family and friends What are we supposed to do? Eat this with our hands? What is wrong with you, lady?! It's like the only nice bone in your body was in your toe! And that got crushed when you forgot how to walk with shoes on! All I wanted was for you to like me Because I love Vince and Vince loves you Do you have any idea how much trouble I've gone through today to try to make it perfect for you? Your 16-year-old nephew made out with a woman twice his age And then another woman ten times his age! Your soon to be married daughter is a lesbian! But did you hear about any of that? No! Not until just now when I accidentally blurted it out! And now, because I'm guessing the rest of the family hates me I'm gonna go Grace, Jack, Karen, your coats please! Let's go! Quickly! Wait, wait wait a minute! You love my son? I do And you love him? I do, Mommy And you you love women? Well, just once with, uh Matt's secretary.
And you're 16 so you love everything So what that tells me is that there's a lot of love at this table And we're all family Well, not you so much anymore, Matty So now we're all gonna sit down together and eat That was nice, honey Vinnie, you wanna pass me them yams? What, now you love me again? You're, like, psychotic And, Will, the beans are perfect Thank you, Annette They're from a can ÀÚ¸·Á¦ÀÛ - ³×ÀÌÆ® µå ó¸ 24 ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Will & Grace ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Á °ÇºÎ¹èÆ÷ / ¼öÁ¤±ÝÁö ¹èÆ÷½Ã ÀÚ¸· Ãâó¸¦ ²À ¹àÇôÁÖ¼¼¿ä You know it's really satisfying using my powers for good.
Who shall I help come out next Thanksgiving? A Supreme Court justice? A major action star? Or maybe just the guy I'm currently seeing They were nice enough people, but those goodbyes were weird I went to hug Vince's sister she put her hands on my boobs It was really uncomfortable You stood there for ten minutes! I had to pull you off! Yeah, well, we're guests I didn't want to be rude! The old whore is back! Oh, speaking of old whores wasn't it great when Nana woke up and played jazz piano for two hours? Yeah, that was just fun Oh, better turn on the rear defrost Wait, you're driving Yeah, honey I'm the designated driver I'm too drunk to drive! And you're not? No.
I don't drink on holidays That's for amateurs like the Chianti Queen back there Yep, and I deserve it I won them over Won 'em all over.
They invited me back for Christmas and New Year's and Ro's first Slam Poetry night (Æ÷ÀÌÆ®¸® ½½·¥: °ø°ÝÀû Åä·Ð ¼ºÇâÀ» ç´Â ½Ã³ ¼Ûȸ) I think I'm going to be drunk a lot in the future 'Cause they are boring and I hate them
In my dream I'm on the subway completely naked And then, all of a sudden that hot gardener from "Desperate Housewives" gets on and he puts his hand on my breast Then that hot smart guy from "Jeopardy!" gets on and puts his hand on my other breast Then that hot Korean guy from "Lost" gets on and puts his hand on my other breast Oh, yeah, in this dream I have three breasts I see Well, I would say that dream represents your fear of dentists Perhaps I'm just saying that because my dentist is hot, smart, and Korean And, for all I know tri-breasted I think I just need to have sex Honey, you know, you and I are going through the same exact thing I haven't had sex in a while either We just need to get back on the horse Or, better yet get back on the man I can't take it anymore I'm so hungry I'm gonna have one of these pumpkin candies Now I'll have to call Dr.
Hung Okay, you know what? This is just rude And if there is one thing I cannot abide, it is rudeness! Hey, homo we're hungry out here! Here's an idea.
How about three big bowls of "Get-out-io's"? There's sugar on one side and I'm not your damn cook on the other! I'd like mine with bananas, please I don't have time to make breakfast today I'm meeting Vince's mom But we're all going over there for Thanksgiving in two days Why don't you just meet her then? I need a head start Vince says she's a tough cookie Oh, that doesn't sound so bad Yeah, what he actually said was that she's already decided to hate me and good luck Well, that doesn't sound so bad Apparently she's never liked any of his boyfriends So I'm gonna take her for a day of shopping You know, give her a whole pretty woman makeover Without spending more than $100 Where're you taking her shopping? Flint, Michigan? Well, I just--I want to get to know her, ya know So I can tell her how honored I am to meet her and how much it means to me to become part of her family You know, just generally blow a bunch of smoke up her fat ass Honey, you know what else is fun? Blowing smoke into a dog's mouth Àª & ±×·¹À̽º Will & Grace 7x10, 11 Queens for a Day ÀÚ¸·Á¦ÀÛ - ³×ÀÌÆ® µå ó¸ 24 ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Will & Grace ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Á °ÇºÎ ¹èÆ÷ / ¼öÁ¤±ÝÁö ¹èÆ÷½Ã ÀÚ¸· Ãâó¸¦ ²À ¹àÇôÁÖ¼¼¿ä Where's that waiter? I'm so hungry I knew I shouldn't have given my Powerbar to that homeless woman I tried to get it back, but her kid was just grippin' it too tightly Service here always stinks How come this place got such a good write-up in the Fagot's Guide? (fogot È£¸ðº¸´Ù ÇÑÂü ´õ ºñÇÏÀûÀÎ ¸») Honey, it's pronounced "fa-GATZ.
" Actually, fools it's Zagat's Uh, not this one It rates restaurants based on cuteness of the wait staff You see here This one got five smiley butts Speakin' of butts had another sex dream last night This time I was in the shower with Barack Obama Oh-bama he was ba-rocking my world Well, you better do it soon You know what they say If you don't use it it'll fall off What exactly will fall off? I don't know.
I don't know what you guys have down there Oh, honey let me explain Imagine the most beautiful flower you've ever seen Its petals opening as it's gently touched by the sun Now imagine a vagina next to it See, even that made me horny Where is that stupid waiter? You just know that idiot got all our orders mixed up Well, here comes the swarthy immigrant now Don't think you're gettin' a tip Oh, that's okay Just the privilege of ordering it paying for it, and hauling it over here is reward enough Ooh, sassy waiters just like the guide promised Well, it's official My mother's toe's broken -Oh, no -What happened? Didn`t he tell you? Uh, I thought I did.
Ya know we went shopping.
And she-- she fell.
It was nothing It was no big deal, you know Certainly no one's fault "No one's fault"? He pressured her into trying on these four-inch hooker heels And then he told her to "work it, girl.
" Okay, in hindsight maybe it wasn't a good idea to make her climb up on the display case and shake her "groove thang," but you know She was having fun up until the time that she fell, and her skirt hiked up and she showed her groove thang to the whole store Well, she sounds like a ball of fun I can't wait to meet her tomorrow She's a hooker, you say? Well, you can all forget about it You can forget it because Thanksgiving's cancelled Why, does she cook with her feet? This is gonna be the first Thanksgiving we're not together as a family since we came over on the Mayflower Mayflower Movers Before Queens, we lived in Bayonne.
' Great.
No sex and now no turkey Either way no stuffin' for you Hang on What about if you and I cook Thanksgiving? We can do the whole thing at your mother's house She wouldn't have to lift a finger Of course she won't she cooks with her feet I don't know.
My mom likes Thanksgiving to be just so She's not too thrilled with you right now, you know You could be setting yourself up for a disaster Or am I setting myself up to be a hero? Pa, who's that handsome stranger who saved Thanksgiving? Well, Ma, I reckon it's our son's boyfriend Yeah, I live in Flushing not the oddly tolerant Ozarks Trust me, by the end of the evening she'll not only have forgiven me she'll be thankin' me All right let's give it a shot Hey, don't worry Will is known for his perfect Thanksgivings Except the one where he proposed to me told me he was gay, and then snuck out in the middle of the night while I was sobbing in bed But I hardly ever think about that one What a cute neighborhood I always thought Queens was just a place to bury bodies or buy discount meat Queens gets a bad rap It doesn't help that we got a town called Flushing (Ç÷¯½Ì: ¼ö¼¼½Ä) - Makes you think of poop - Yeah, I got it Well, so this is it, huh? Family kitchen I bet there's a lot of history here Yeah, sure is Right there That's the spot my uncle got shot And, uhThat's where I was standing when I accidentally shot my uncle Whereas I was thinking less along the lines of bloodshed and more along the lines of pasta dinners Yeah, don't say "whereas" in front of my mom She already thinks you're a preening sadistic boob I'm paraphrasing Don't you worry Whatever she dishes out I can take Today I have the patience of a saint And, from looking around the room I have plenty to choose from - Vinnie.
- Hey, Ro.
Ro, this is Will Will, this is my sister Ro - Nice to meet you.
- You too.
He's pretty.
put a mustache on him he's cousin Gina Thank you And congratulations I hear you're getting married.
That's great Yeah, Matt's an amazing guy He went to summer camp with Renee Zellweger But that's not the only reason I'm marrying him Wow, sounds fascinating Can't wait to meet him Is that my Vinnie? Oh, now that's my dad Listen, don't let him get to you He can be a real S.
O.
B.
Okay? -And there he is -I thought I heard someone in our kitchen - Hey, honey - Hi, Annette Good to see you up and around What a very stylish cane.
It suits you Would you like me to climb up on the counter so you can take a better look at it? I'm glad we can all laugh about it 'Cause 'cause it's the best medicine Vince, you gonna introduce me? See how he starts right in? Yeah, I know I'm rude and you're disappointed, Dad I'm Will.
Nice to meet you, Paul I'm so sorry about your wife's toe Ah, it happens One time I was reaching for the grated cheese and I broke her jaw You look good, Vince See it? It's just one dig after another Yeah, he's merciless Listen, Annette Vince gave me all of your recipes and I want you to know I'm gonna cook everything just the way you do No, you're not I woulda cooked it with two good feet Hey, you made it! Barely You told us to look for the house with the El Dorado parked out front There's, like Happy Thanksgiving, William You missed all the drama at the parade today Underdog got loose and mounted Bart Simpson So, I guess, really his name should be Topdog it smells so good in here For God's sake, Grace don't draw attention to your nose Now, remember, everything you do here tonight is a reflection on me I understand completely, Will Your large shiny forehead needs some powder I, on the other hand look fantastic Hey, don't hog the forehead! Stop it you bat Look, just try to be friendly Get to know people - Talk me up, mingle - All right, all right Which one of them did you say had the little problem with OxyContin? Oh, that'd be me Let's get to know each other How's it goin'? Vince's mother is still riding me about the toe I don't even think it was broken I mean, half the foot was bunion The mall paramedics almost threw up when they saw it Don't worry about the mom I am here to make you look good And I'm not gonna leave your side until I do - Hey - Hey Hey, Uncle Paul the El Dorado's fixed! I'm gonna go shower -Thanks, Grace.
It would be great -Buzz off, there's a hot guy here What are you doing? I told you to mingle Grace took the guy I wanted to mingle with Well, mingle with Vince's sister Ro She's a teacher She has a condo in Astoria - She's getting married - Oh, yay.
Lemon, lemon, lemon I win a dull night Annette, can I get you a chair? No.
It's better I stand get used to the pain Annette, you make passive aggressive so adorable ¼Ò±ØÀû °ø°Ý: È®¿¬È÷ °ø°ÝÇÏÁø ¾ÊÀ¸¸é¼µµ ¾î ²½ÄÀ¸·Îµç ºÒÆíÇÔÀ» Ç¥ÇöÇÏ´Â ¹æ½Ä) I'm gettin' a beer You want me to grab you one? Yeah, Dad, I drink That's why I haven't made detective That's it I can't take it anymore - I'm gonna confront him - No, no, not tonight, you're not.
I have to I'm angry And anger is the number one enemy of the hair follicle I will not lose my hair for that man Look.
You are not making any scenes tonight You've put up with that man's imaginary taunts for years now You can last one more day Besides, if anything goes wrong tonight Mussolini in the blonde rinse is gonna blame it all on me Fine.
Let me just.
.
No one's jumpin' ship yet.
I'll wait Karen, the most incredible thing just happened to me You found something in this living room worth more than 20 bucks? No, no, I met the hottest guy -Hey -Hey Oh, honey, him? Oh, he's cute You should do him I can't, that's so inappropriate and where? Anywhere.
For God's sake half the house is covered in plastic How would I even do it? All right, Grace imagine the most beautiful flower you've ever seen - Its petals opening - Karen, I know how to do it I just don't know how to make it happen It's been a long time You're rusty, huh? The old whore is rusty All right, well, honey you want me to go talk to him? No, you can't that's so inappropriate, and when? As soon as this generic OxyContin wears off It won't be long I'm starting to get the feeling back in my tongue Hello, Ro Her-ro I'm Jack Will's friend Not like Will and your brother are "friends".
Okay? You know one day they'll eventually be "roommates".
And then the proud parents of a Chinese girl I know my brother's gay I've known it since he beat up some guy in high school when he said Lee Majors looked dopey Ah, yes Who hasn't had that fight? All right mingle me this Are you nervous about your wedding? Kind of 'cause I'm a lesbian A lesbo says what? I am sorry to dump that on you but this has been eating me up I had to tell someone what about your brother? He's gayish It seemed easier to do it with a stranger with a sweet face Oh, it is you just gotta know right parks Oh, you mean me! Oh, I'm sorry I'm so sorry What am I gonna do? I can't get married The thought of my fiance's touch sickens me I'm a lesbian I'm a lesbian! Oh, my God it feels so good to say it out loud - Hey, babe - Hi, honey! It's hard to pull off an Italian Thanksging I got a lot of bocce balls in the air (º¸Ä¡: ÀÌÅ»¸®¾Æ½Ä º¼¸µ ºñ½ÁÇÑ °Í, ball in the air¸¦ ºñƲ¾î¼ ÀÌÅ»¸®¾Æ½ÄÀÇ ÇØ°áÇؾßÇÒ ¹®Á¦°¡ ¸¹´Ù´Â æ) How's it going? Good, good.
does my bra look stuffed? - No - Damn, I just stuffed it What is Karen doing over there? God, I hope she's playing it cool Hey, cannoli see that hamantash over there? (Ä«³î¸®´Â ÀÌÅ»¸®¾Æ, ÇϸÕŸ½¬´Â À¯ÅÂÀÎ °úÀÚ ¹Ð°¡·ç·Î ¸¸µé°í ¼Ó¿¡ ´ÞÄÞÇÑ °Ô µé¾î ÀÖ´Â Á¡ÀÌ ºñ½ÁÇÔ) How'd you like to hit that? So sweetie, I'll go get you a drink and I'll be right back Thanks, babe God, I hate him A nice guy, but.
I can't get through sex with him without pretending he's Renee Zellweger I met her once Matt went to camp with her It's the only reason I'm marrying him Yeah, okay Listen.
Ro - Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.
Wanna hold my hand? I'm not a therapist though I do own a monocle, but it seems to me perhaps you should not marry him But I have to My parents have been dreaming about my wedding forever It'll kill them to know that their only girl loves only girls Whoa, what are you talking about? Your parents have done everything right They raised all their kids gay Why would they not accept you? It's different with Vince He's a guy, and we're Italian All Italian guys are gay That's because the country's shaped like a thigh-high boot Look, you're the only person who knows so please don't tell anyone Well, I won't but you have to, Ro And this is the perfect opportunity.
Thanksgiving celebrates the day the girl Indians first introduced the girl pilgrims to sex Yeah, they called it "maize".
Because lesbian sex is very confusing and if you're not careful one can lose their way So you're saying I should come out today? Yes! At dinner You can wave a turkey leg for emphasis - Hey - Hey - I'm Sal - Grace.
- So you wanna see the garage? - Yeah Don't do that! That's Kinda how I shot my uncle Oh.
I'm gonna throw 'em out and start again Don't worry about it This is Queens Three second rule's like a three day rule (¹¹µç 3ÃÊ ³»¿¡ ÇÏ¸é ¿ë¼ µÈ´Ù´Â ¹ýÄ¢) No, no, no I'm gonna throw them out Your mom will know She's a witch I mean, she's darling Why are you doing this to yourself? Look.
You're important to me And.
.
Your family is important to you and what kind of future are we gonna have together if if I'm not accepted here? That's sweet But, Will, I really think you're reading way too much into everything my mother says Hey, there you are Vinnie boy you wanna go downstairs and get the leaf for the dining room table? We can't do it together? Would it kill you to spend some time with me?! You shouldn't do that That's kinda how Vince shot his uncle Annette I had the feeling our paths would cross again Why are you talking like that? I don't know it just seemed appropriate the way you appeared out of the mist like a Nazi soldier You seem nervous, Will Like maybe you think you gotta impress me or something - I don't? - No, you do You know, this family's got a lot of happy occasions coming up Christmas, New Year's Ro's wedding You think you're gonna be here for all of 'em? I'd like to think I am And I'd like to think I'm gonna dance again I know one thing for sure By the end of the night you're gonna love me I doubt it I've yet to meet a man who's good enough for my son Believe me, it would have to be one hell of a perfect evening for me to feel that way about you -Is that a challenge, Annette? -It might be Then meet me on the airfield with the letters of transit.
Come alone I don't know what the hell that was but I don't like it! I thought we were doing a thing! Oh, damn it! Oh, God There you are I've been looking all over for you This two-bedroom attached house is like a Rubik's Cube (·çºò½º Å¥ºê: Á¤À°¸éü »öÀ» ¸ÂÃß´Â ÆÛÁñ) How's it going out there? Great! Big news The wedding's off Ro is a lesbian and she's gonna tell everybody at dinnertonight If you never told me to talk to her I woulda never convinced her to come out today But don't worry, buddy I'll give you all the credit Jack, she cannot come out tonight! Because if she does, her mother is somehow gonna blame it on me This has to be the perfect dinner and I'm not gonna let you or any other lesbian ruin it Will, don't be so insensitive Put yourself in her Birkenstocks Look, I think it's great that she wants to come out I'm sure she has all the makings of a wonderful lesbian and she's going to make a bunch of cats a fine mother someday But not today Today is my day! Wildred Pierce! (¹Ðµå·¹µå ÇǾ: ¸Í¸ñÀûÀÌ°í ¼º°øÁöÇâÀûÀ̾ú´ø ¿µÈ¿Í ¼Ò¼³ÀÇ Ä³¸¯ÅÍ) I am ashamed of you! And not just because your hands are out of proportion to the rest of your body This is one of the hardest things for a gay person to do and being a lesbian is very close to being a gay person You made me come out to my mother on Thanksgiving It was the best decision of my life Why would you wanna deny her that? You're right She should come out whenever she's ready I'm being selfish - Where is she? - Watching football Of course she is Karen.
I did it You put lipstick on all the Virgin Marys around the house? No, no, not yet -Hey -Hey I made out with him It was so hot! And his tongue was everywhere I swear he tried to unhook my bra with it Honey, I can roll dice with my tongue Karen, you were so right It was just what I needed You should really take your own advice one of these days and get back in there No, honey that's not for me I mean, I know I talk a good game, but well I guess I can tell ya Grace, I'm a virgin I've never even seen a man's tenders Actually, I'm up to 1,400 Hey, Ro.
Listen, Jack told me all about what you told him and I just want you to know I couldn't be happier What? He told you? Oh no no! Only because he knows how supportive and sensitive I am Oh, thank you Keeping it in has been such a struggle.
.
Yeah.
I'm talking Look-- I just want you to be absolutely sure You may not be a lesbian I mean, everybody fantasizes about Angelina Jolie Yeah, I told my trainer I want her stomach - Hello? - I'm sorry I got distracted when you mentioned Angelina Jolie I kept picturing her with Renee Could you imagine if they went to the same camp? Okay, you are a lesbian Congratulations and--and welcome But, um-- Do you.
do you need to come out today? Well, Jack told me that's what Thanksgiving is for Oh, Jack No, dear.
No Thanksgiving is traditionally when gay men come out Lesbians come out at Christmas I think it has something to do with all the bulky sweaters (¹Ì±¹¿¡´Â ÀüÅëÀûÀ¸·Î Å©¸®½º¸ ½º¿¡ ÀÔ´Â Ã̽º·¯¿î ÅÐ ½º¿þÅÍ°¡ ÀÖ´Ù°í ÇÔ) Well, that does make sense Plus, I like the whole message of Christmas You know, that a woman can have a baby without a man So.
Ro and Matt they're getting married at Saint Mel's Oh, Saint Mel's My favorite saint I love the way he used to boss around Alice (ÀèÀº "¾Ù¸®½º" ó´Â 7-80³â´ë ½ÃÆ®ÄÞ¿¡ ³ª¿À´Â '¸á' ¾ê±â¸¦ ÇÏ°í ÀÖÀ½) Hey, Dad Dallas score yet? I don't know I wasn't really paying attention To the game or to my life, Dad? Oh, man I got jumpers Hey, Jack.
Listen, you've been here Is it just me or is my dad weird to me? Oh, my God he's a monster! Thank you Thank you I thought it was.
I thought it was all in my mind.
Yeah, which one is he again? Hi, honey Karen, why are you all - Hey - Hey - Here's your dice back - Hey! Oh, yeah What did you do? Oh, honey you were right That was just what I needed Oh, that hunky spaghetti jockey chewed my ear like he was at an all you-can-eat calamari bar How could you? What? You told me to Not with my guy!! Well, honey I didn't plan it After I pulled his shirt off we had nothing left to talk about - Hey, Vince - What are you smiling about? Nothing -Hey -Hey Hey!! Just got his learner's permit Thinks he's the coolest - I'm so into him - Yeah? Well, I'm double into him - Well, I'm gonna ask him out - I'm gonna ask him to move in He gave me a hickey He gave me a child I am pregnant, Grace! No, you're not You can't get pregnant from kissing Oh, thank God! Look, I am not sharing him with you I think that Sal is serious relationship material Dude, I just macked on two old ladies I might need to borrow your dad's shed later Baby cousin Sal is such a good little host He gave Grace a tour of my bedroom Now he's giving it to Karen Yeah.
I had a peek at it before When did your mom turn it into a sewing room? She didn't It's exactly how I left it That's my old Singer and my old sewing trophies How's everything going in here? Don't mind me I'm just getting some ice for my injury You know we usually eat at 4:00.
It's ten 'til Don't you worry everything's gonna be perfect Who you trying to convince? Me or you? Man, if she were my mom I'd have sewn myself a noose Oh, Ro, I'm so excited you're coming out tonight You're finding yourself You're growing up It's like a lesbian Judy Blume book Are you there, God? It's me, Marge!" (ÁÖµð ºí·ë ºÏ ½Ã¸®Áî Áß Çϳª: ÇÑ ¼Ò³à°¡ ÀÚ½ÅÀÇ Á¤Ã¼¼ºÀ» ã¾Æ°¡´Â ³»¿ë) Yeah, I'm not doing it tonight I decided to wait until Christmas What? No! You have to It was Will, wasn't it? He got to you with his devilish charm and those piercing eyes and occasional touch you never know what it means Ah, Will.
It just seemed to make sense to wait Plus Matt has his camp reunion the first week in December and there's a rumor Renee Zellweger may show up Have you seen her as a brunette? But if you do it now, you'll get Christmas presents that you can actually use Like a chunky diving watch Or a little camera you can make documentaries with I do have an idea for a short on female iron workers I have just the Ani DiFranco song to play over the credits (Æä¹Ì´ÏÁòÀû ¼ºÇâÀÌ °ÇÑ ¿©°¡¼ö) There you go See, it's not healthy to keep something like that bottled up It's not fair to you or Matt You're right.
I have to tell them Thank you Has anyone ever told you you're a very wise man? No, they have not Gin We've been playing poker Then poker Look at him Just sitting there eating his peanuts like he wishes I was never even born Funny, he just looks like a man eating peanuts to me Hey, Vince Does this color look okay to you? I dunno I guess it looks kinda red You're right I am? Thank you for validating me, Daddy I love you I love you too No, it's not red it's green! Karen, this is crazy It's the holidays I don't wanna be fighting over a guy with you Honey, I don't either - Truce? - Of course Hey, free seat by me Outta the way, skank - Hey - Hey Darling, I'm gonna back you up Just a smidge - Hey - Hey You know, I think it's hot when grown men are still into comic books I think it's hot that you call me "mrs" - Would you like some wine? - Sure! How 'bout something from the bar? Oh, nice! Hey, can I take some for my buddies? Sal, what the hell are you doing? These ladies said I could, Ma "Ma"? What the hell are you doing giving alcohol to a 16-year-old? Angie? Angie? Nana, what are you doing in the middle of the floor? You still trying to get to that piano? All right, all right I'll put you by it But you're gonna miss dinner again Okay, five minutes to dinner, everybody! Your little friends were causing a commotion over there I hope that there's not any kind of problem Problem? Only if having too much fun is a problem Is there some kinda problem here?! Well, it depends Karen and I made out with Vince's 16-year-old cousin You're the lawyer You tell me Oh, my God This is a nightmare! Or in your case a dream come true Okay, okay.
Nobody can find out Don't tell anybody - I'm not telling anyone - I'm not telling anyone Oh, I'm telling everyone! I've been emailing pictures of it from my camera phone for the last half hour You said those were just for you Okay, Sal? How about this? If you keep your mouth shut 'til tomorrow I'll let you touch that girl's boobs again before she leaves -Which boobs? -Which ones do you want? -The big ones -Done Good Crisis averted Okay, everyone! Ro has an announcement she'd like to make Oh, for God's sake And, uh, well, not to tip anything but "lez" all be quiet.
Hey, could I just borrow Ro for a second? Are you trying to steal my girl? Oh, I don't think I could Look, I know how important this announcement is to you Again, congratulations and welcome You'll be receiving your kit in a few weeks But if you can keep your mouth shut until tomorrow I'll let you touch that girl's boobs before she leaves -Which boobs? -Which ones do you want? -The smaller ones -Done Come on, what's the announcement, pumpkin? I just wanna say how much I love my fiance Oh, that is so sweet Oh, please don't Don't touch me Oh, Vince the table looks terrific! Thanks.
And the turkey smells great It cut like butter Turkey-shaped butter Yeah.
You're gonna give someone a perfect Thanksgiving you gotta cook a nice moist turkey And I did Well, me and a little friend I like to call the aluminum foil tent If you really want it to go well you gotta make your own scented candles Which I did Well, with a little help from a couple friends I like to call hand-grated cinnamon and vanilla extract It's so good we found each other We are one hot couple Vincent D'Angelo lace up your tap shoes It's show time - Dinner's ready! - Whoa-ho, look at that! Boy, did you cut it close Or, did I time it just perfectly? Now, Annette, I know how much you like dark meat - so I've saved you a drumstick - Yeah, did you tear all the ligaments in that too? That's funny I do enjoy our give and take -Oh, Sal, get your hands off me -I'm not touching you No, he's touching me, honey -Well, then, who's touching -Sorry, I dropped my napkin Up my skirt? All right, all right, everybody Now listen Usually, every year, it's traditional I give the toast on Thanksgiving, but being that Will did such a wonderful job preparing the meal I think it's only right that he should do it Oh, thank you, Paul Look all All Vincent and I wanted was for this warm wonderful family toto be together -Turkey's a little dry.
-No, it isn't Because, when you get right down to it what is a perfect Thanksgiving? -Instant potatoes? -No, they're fresh It's not about Pilgrims or food, or football Or salad forks 'cause I don't got one It's about family and friends What are we supposed to do? Eat this with our hands? What is wrong with you, lady?! It's like the only nice bone in your body was in your toe! And that got crushed when you forgot how to walk with shoes on! All I wanted was for you to like me Because I love Vince and Vince loves you Do you have any idea how much trouble I've gone through today to try to make it perfect for you? Your 16-year-old nephew made out with a woman twice his age And then another woman ten times his age! Your soon to be married daughter is a lesbian! But did you hear about any of that? No! Not until just now when I accidentally blurted it out! And now, because I'm guessing the rest of the family hates me I'm gonna go Grace, Jack, Karen, your coats please! Let's go! Quickly! Wait, wait wait a minute! You love my son? I do And you love him? I do, Mommy And you you love women? Well, just once with, uh Matt's secretary.
And you're 16 so you love everything So what that tells me is that there's a lot of love at this table And we're all family Well, not you so much anymore, Matty So now we're all gonna sit down together and eat That was nice, honey Vinnie, you wanna pass me them yams? What, now you love me again? You're, like, psychotic And, Will, the beans are perfect Thank you, Annette They're from a can ÀÚ¸·Á¦ÀÛ - ³×ÀÌÆ® µå ó¸ 24 ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Will & Grace ÀÚ¸·ÆÀ Á °ÇºÎ¹èÆ÷ / ¼öÁ¤±ÝÁö ¹èÆ÷½Ã ÀÚ¸· Ãâó¸¦ ²À ¹àÇôÁÖ¼¼¿ä You know it's really satisfying using my powers for good.
Who shall I help come out next Thanksgiving? A Supreme Court justice? A major action star? Or maybe just the guy I'm currently seeing They were nice enough people, but those goodbyes were weird I went to hug Vince's sister she put her hands on my boobs It was really uncomfortable You stood there for ten minutes! I had to pull you off! Yeah, well, we're guests I didn't want to be rude! The old whore is back! Oh, speaking of old whores wasn't it great when Nana woke up and played jazz piano for two hours? Yeah, that was just fun Oh, better turn on the rear defrost Wait, you're driving Yeah, honey I'm the designated driver I'm too drunk to drive! And you're not? No.
I don't drink on holidays That's for amateurs like the Chianti Queen back there Yep, and I deserve it I won them over Won 'em all over.
They invited me back for Christmas and New Year's and Ro's first Slam Poetry night (Æ÷ÀÌÆ®¸® ½½·¥: °ø°ÝÀû Åä·Ð ¼ºÇâÀ» ç´Â ½Ã³ ¼Ûȸ) I think I'm going to be drunk a lot in the future 'Cause they are boring and I hate them