The Closer s07e17 Episode Script
Fool's Gold
Your cellphone's been ringing all day.
Why don't you pick it up? 'Cause I know who's calling, and I don't want to talk to her.
Yeah, but what if it's an emergency? Then she ought to call 911, not me.
Flynn, hey.
Why don't we, uh, go down to McClure's for the early-bird special? You know, hang out at the bar for the game.
Hang out at the bar.
So, what's in it for me? You can watch me get drunk.
You know, uh, carpooling has its trade-offs.
If you live your life on the wagon, now and then you have to drive it.
Stop calling me.
Excuse me, Lieutenant Provenza, sir.
There's someone here to see you.
What's the matter, Louie? Your phone doesn't sound broken to me.
Liz.
I called you a million times.
Which wife is Liz, again? His third? I told you, no family at work under any circumstances.
That's definitely Heather.
Not our kids, not our grandkids, and certainly not you.
You want to talk to me, call me at home.
Me and Flynn are out of here.
"Flynn and I.
" "Flynn and I are out of here.
" Louie, this is an emergency.
Correcting his grammar.
Wow.
His very first ex.
Okay, Liz.
What's this about? I had to sell my wedding ring.
And in our divorce settlement, it says you paid $500 for it.
Wait a minute.
You sold our wedding ring? And do you know how much I got for it, Louie? $49? Uh-huh.
$49.
You mailed the ring to a place called Goldibucks?! Goldibucks is a legitimate business.
They advertise on TV.
And, frankly, I have to have the money.
Now.
Hey, Liz.
Is everything okay? No, it's not.
It's Frank.
He's sick.
His asthma is getting worse.
He needs Insulin twice a day.
His blood pressure is through the roof, and it's getting harder and harder to pay for his prescriptions.
Oh, Liz, I'm so sorry.
Flynn.
Frank is just a dog.
Would you call him "just a dog" in front of your grandkids? Liz, please.
God, don't start an argument here.
We finally found an arrangement that makes our relationship very strong.
What are you talking about? We barely see each other.
That's the arrangement.
Look, look.
I found the address for this Goldibucks place.
It's only We'll go down there right now and get the ring back, which I can't believe you sold.
Doesn't our wedding ring mean anything to you at all? Of course it does.
Here, I'll show you what it means.
You know, you're right, Liz.
Frank doesn't sound too good.
Doesn't look so hot, either.
This dog's still ugly as sin.
What can I say? I have a type.
But thank you for taking me to the gold store in an actual police car.
Ah.
You know, in the 10 years Louie and I were married, he never once let me do a ride-along.
Really? Want to turn on the siren? Could I? Oh, God.
Yeah, yeah.
Just hit that switch right there.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Frank, baby, calm down.
Yeah, yeah, turn that off.
Don't get overexcited.
Turn that damn siren off! Okay, okay, okay.
That dog! I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it.
Easy back there.
Think about your blood pressure.
You better be talking to this dog.
It's nice to see he wasn't just an asshole at home.
Oh, you have no idea.
Come on, baby.
Come on.
So, what's the plan? The plan is to give whatever scam artist owns this place a good old-fashioned what for! Oh, sorry.
We're -- we're closing.
Oh, well, uh Uh, yeah.
Anyway, uh I would like to see someone about thischeck.
Oh.
Okay.
Well, just give me one moment and let me see if there's anything I can do.
Are you allowed to show your badge? I don't want you breaking any laws.
The constitution demands that to enter a place of business on a legal call, you -- Liz, Liz, please.
Please.
If you want your money back, let me handle it! Ah.
Oh.
Man.
How can you work with all that racket? It's just temporary.
We're putting in a new security system.
Yeah, so, what exactly can I help you guys with? Well, first off, I'm sure a sweet-looking girl like yourself had nothing to do with it, but we -- But -- but someone here didn't give this poor old lady the proper payment for her ring.
Oh.
And if you could help us out, we'd be very grateful.
Okay, yeah.
Uh, Liz Provenza.
Mm-hmm.
Well, I can't write you a check, but let me see if I can find your jewelry and return it to you.
Give me one sec.
Liz Provenza, Liz Provenza.
Ah, well, she's gone to the back to get the ring, and your constitution is still sacred.
What the hell is he doing -- rooting for truffles? Liz Provenza.
Got it.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Beautifuland quick.
Oh, sorry.
Did anybody ever tell you that you have an amazing smile? Good lord.
What? She does.
Thank you.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
Oh, we're just -- we have to lock the door.
Bye.
Oh.
Okay.
Sure.
Bye.
See you.
If you want to sell the ring so bad So badly.
All right, so badly -- so badly, I-I know a guy in the jewelry business who will give us what the ring is actually worth.
One minute.
Frank needs to stretch his legs.
His legs are 5 inches long.
Do you hear how bad Frank is wheezing? Just write her a check, already.
I've written her I bought the house that she and that dog live in.
No more checks.
Louie? Isn't that the woman who was helping us? She said they were locking up.
Whoa, whoa.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
All the jewelry -- it's gone.
Oh, God.
Don't jump to any conclusions.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Liz, Liz, for heaven's sakes! Frank, come back! That woman, she pulled off a glove.
Don't eat that, Frank.
No, Frank.
Give me the glove.
Oh, no, Frank.
No.
Give me the glove.
No, no, Frank.
No, Frank.
Give me the glove.
No, Frank, no.
Frank.
Frank, Frankie.
Come on, Frank.
No.
That rubber glove was worn by a robber in a robbery that we let happen.
No, no, no, no.
Small-time robbery.
No big deal.
Chief -- no.
Not yet.
Lieutenant Tao? Victim's name tag reads "Milo Billings.
" His Facebook page is up on his computer -- says he's 64 years old.
I didn't see any wounds, but Kendall found broken ribs.
Maybe it was cardiac arrest during the robbery, which would make this murder.
If I could just explain -- I saidnot yet.
Detective Gabriel.
Yeah, well, uh, Milo's name is all over these business documents.
They have him listed here as the owner.
Yeah, well, I can -- What part of "not yet" are you misunderstanding? Detective Sanchez.
You see the cords, Chief? These feed from four security cameras connected to a hard drive that used to be there.
Well, at least we won't have to watch video of you two on the news ignoring a robbery and a murder.
Okay, your turn.
What happened? Okay, Chief, when we arrived here, there was a girl behind the counter, who we thought was an employee, packing up for the night.
She was packing up, all right.
And neither of you saw or heard anything that would indicate there was a robbery going on? They were drilling the safe while you were here?! Okay, in our defense, Chief, the girl said she was installing a new security system.
Does she have a name? How about a description? Oh, well, uh, she was pretty.
Uh, yeah.
Sexy, even.
Yeah, she was cute.
Nice legs.
Yeah.
She was 5'9", looked between 28 and 32, wore a brunette wig, blue eyes -- could have been contacts.
The only time we saw her male partner was when they were running away.
Uh, Chief, this is my first ex-wife, Liz, and -- and her dog, Frank.
We came here to get back a ring that she sold by mail.
It's a pleasure, Liz, andFrank.
There is some good news, Chief.
The female thief, she dropped a latex glove.
Now, with any luck, we'll be able to get a print off the inside of it.
Okay.
Where's the glove? Well, it's, uh, temporarily unavailable, but I assure you it will show up in a day or so.
The dog, uh Frank ate the glove.
Shut up, Frank.
Lieutenant Tao, do you think it's possible that the glove will make it through in a usable fashion? Drug mules use balloons made out of this material all the time.
All right, look, uh We need to hang on to Frank here, so -- You can't hold Frank.
He has a doctor's appointment tomorrow afternoon.
This is a violation of his civil rights.
Liz.
Liz, dogs do not have civil rights.
Their owners do.
You can't impound my dog without my permission.
All right, look -- we need to keep Frank, so, Liz, maybe you could stay with us, too, if you don't mind? I'll help any way I can.
Frank truly needs someone who will pay attention to him.
Chief, I found a search warrant.
So you came here with your ex-wife and a warrant? No, no.
Wait a minute.
That -- that's not our warrant, no.
Uh, Chief, I don't think this warrant is legit.
Why? Because it's signed by a Judge Judy.
The suspects identified themselves as L.
A.
P.
D.
officers with badges and guns.
They produce a warrant, they seize all the gold in the store, saying that they need to examine it for stolen property, then they take the surveillance footage, and I know all this because PSB has been investigating these robberies for three months.
It still doesn't mean these guys are cops.
Anyone can download a warrant off the Internet.
But the warrant that was left behind today demonstrates a professional understanding of the law, and I can't afford to just hope that these people are thieves impersonating officers.
She's right.
She can't.
So, the case belongs to Professional Standards.
I see no reason for Major Crimes to be involved.
Excuse me? You haven't heard chief Johnson's side of things.
This robbery was significantly different than the others, which is why I think that Chief Johnson and Major Crimes should be involved.
Significantly different how? The thieves were interrupted and left their tools behind.
Interrupted by whom? I'll get back to that.
Lieutenants Flynn and Provenza.
And there was a murder.
I thought the victim died of a heart attack.
During the commission of a felony, which makes this a murder.
Is there any way I can just avoid asking this question? No.
No, there isn't.
Okay.
Flynn and Provenza witnessed a robbery/murder without stopping it or collecting any evidence? Uh, the female robber took off her latex glove.
So we do have fingerprints? We're having to wait on that.
Why are we waiting? I'm the Chief of Police.
I'll call the Prints section, and we'll put a rush on it.
The glove is not with prints section.
Of course not.
Where is it? Lieutenant Provenza's ex-wife Liz was with him at the store, and her dog, Frank.
Frank got to the glove first and consumed it.
So, if I'm understanding you correctly, and I fear that I do, Lieutenant Provenza's ex-wife's dog ate the evidence.
And we're -- we're having to wait for it to reappear.
All right, you know what, Captain? If this is what you really want, then fine.
You continue investigating the robberies, and Major Crimes can handle the homicide.
But I want you, Chief Johnson, to work together and to share information.
And please remember how the words "together" and "share" are traditionally defined.
When will Frank be done with the glove? Sometime in the next 24 hours, according to Dr.
Morales' best guess.
Is there any way to speed this up? Laxatives.
Frank's too sick for that.
All right, then.
We wait.
So, what do we know about our victim, Milo Billings? Okay, he's been arrested a couple times over the last 20 years, mostly low-level con jobs.
He's basically a street-scam artist.
Milo found a way to steal with a storefront.
So he decided to cash in on the gold craze.
So he and his partner, Jerry Cooper, they opened up Goldibucks two years ago.
Yeah, preying on desperate, gullible divorcées.
Are we talking about your dating life? Uh, Detective Gabriel, I need to speak to the victim's partner, Jerry Cooper, as quickly as possible, please.
Hello, everyone.
In the interest of sharing, here's all the info on the previous gold-store robberies that PSB's been working on.
We haven't been able to identify the thieves, so we're calling them Bonnie and Clyde.
Did you guys check your stolen-inventory list with pawnshops, ma'am? Yes, but nothing's turned up so far.
Gold has an extremely low melting point.
All Bonnie and Clyde would need is a pot, a blowtorch, and some Borax to turn their loot into gold bars.
Why don't you let me take care of where the gold goes, and you concentrate on the murder? It's all one thing to me.
Look, if we don't go about this property, the thieves will say that the victim was dead when they broke into the store and that they tried to revive him.
We have to get the right kind of confession to call this a murder.
Uh, Chief? The victim's partner, Jerry Cooper -- he's on his way up.
Do you want him in interview room 1? You found Mr.
Cooper already? No, I didn't find him.
He came in on his own.
Oh, all right, then.
I guess I'll go talk to him.
Chief, shouldn't I interview this person with you? Uh, why don't you go on ahead, and I'll be right there.
Thank you.
Why do you think Mr.
Cooper showed up here on his own? Because Milo said the cops raided us.
Milo said that? When did you talk to Mr.
Billings? Well, I was on the phone with him when the cops came into our store.
Listen to me -- "our store.
" Technically, we're 50/50, but I'd say Milo was more in charge, if you had to pick, like, a totally responsible party.
So if there were things that didn't belong at Goldibucks, they're Milo's.
I wouldn't even know about them.
Mr.
Cooper, what exactly did Milo say to you on the phone? That two cops were in the store with a warrant, insisting we had stolen property, which, if we did, that would be Milo's.
This is very important, Mr.
Cooper.
Did Milo describe the police officers who entered your store? Just that they were a man and a woman.
Why aren't you asking Milo what they looked like? He was there.
Mr.
Cooper, I'm sorry to inform you that your partner, Milo, died of a heart attack today when your store was robbed.
What? You're t-t telling me We were robbed?! Oh, my God.
Tell me.
What did they take? Did you hear the part about your partner dying of a heart attack? Yeah, yeah.
Very sad.
His diet, you wouldn't believe, but the inventory -- what's missing? Oh, my God.
It -- it looks like everything in the display cases.
Okay, that's not so bad.
We're insured for that.
What else? The stuff in the back room.
The back room?! That's worse, but also insured.
And? The safe was cleared out.
They took everything in the safe? Not the safe.
Oh, my God.
Mr.
Cooper, what was in the safe? What was in the safe? What was in the safe? Uh, um nothing much.
My personal valuables, a baseball card, my birth certificate a picture of me with Bruce Willis.
Do you have a Valium or a Xanax? Like the 50-milligram kind I take when my parents visit? Buzz, can you, uh, put me through to the Chief, please? Sure thing.
Uh, Chief, I need to talk to you about some of Goldibucks' recent financial transactions.
Okay, you -- you have to help me get my stuff back.
I need to go on the news, talk to the robbers.
You let victims do that, right? When they've lost a child, Mr.
Cooper, not a bracelet.
Mr.
Cooper, if there was something specific in that safe, something unique, and you could describe it to us, we would have a much better chance of finding those thieves.
So, if you do find my stuff, you have to look at all of it? You can't just h-hand it back to me? Captain Raydor, why don't you explain to Jerry here how he is now in the center of our ongoing investigation.
Pardon me.
We believe that the people who robbed Goldibucks are either police impersonators or police officers acting illegally.
Well, that's even more against the law.
Isn't it? What's this guy's criminal record? Okay, so, financials for Goldibucks were pretty consistent up until about a week ago, when they received a half-million-dollar wire transfer from the Cayman Islands.
Freeze those accounts, Detective.
That money is connected to something that was in the Goldibucks safe, something that Jerry clearly wants, and it's not his Bruce Willis photo.
Um, Jerry has no criminal or violent history, and Raydor has been telling him that police officers might be involved.
I'm listening, Lieutenant.
Well, if -- if you need a dirty cop, Chief, I'm at your service.
Well, I could direct Jerry to your house, but he'll be showing up to make a deal with a crooked cop and his female partner.
Oh, no.
Never.
Not -- not in a million years.
I spent 10 years in the same house with that woman, and -- and that is just never -- You have no choice.
Lieutenant, right now, where you go, Frank goes, and where Frank goes Louie, I swear, I don't know how you live with this smell.
This smell is your dog.
All I'm getting is wheezing.
I will admit, Louie, there are times I miss you -- when we get together with our kids and our grandkids and you laugh.
I always did love your laugh.
It might have been interesting to have gotten through the rough patches just to see how we would have ended up.
Well And there are parts of our relationship that always worked.
Oh, yeah.
Mm.
And I'm sure there must be things you miss about me, too.
Oh, yes, of course.
Uh, look.
I can show you right now what I miss the most.
I turned off the wire.
We're alone.
I could kill the lights.
And we probably got a good five minutes.
And what would we do with the other four? Jerry's approaching the house.
Here we go.
Okay.
I've got audio now.
Yes? Who is it? Jerry Cooper.
Y-you robbed my store today.
Oh, God.
Don't beat me up.
I'm here to offer you a deal.
Get in here! Get up here.
Good boy! All right, he's not wearing a wire.
No wires.
He's not carrying a gun, so take your positions.
All right, sit.
Sit down in this chair right now! What are you doing at my house, accusing me of being a robber? God, no, no, no.
I don't care what you did at Goldibucks today.
I'm insured.
And so my business partner died.
He was a criminal, like you.
No offense.
I am just an unemployed appraiser who got caught up in the wrong crowd, and all I need, really, is for you to give me back two little things you stole, before you melt the rest down.
Which two little things? Good.
See? We're already bargaining.
That's great.
All right, I should tell you that for those two little things, I will pay you $10,000.
$10,000? Okay, okay.
$25,000.
$25,000.
What two items are we talking about? That was quick.
What are we dealing with here? Show me what you stole, and I'll pick them out.
Oh, no.
No.
You're trying to lowball us.
All right, Liz.
Melt everything.
D-d-don't do that! You don't know the value of what you have.
I'm the expert here.
Oh.
Oh.
You're the expert, are you? All right.
How much, uh, if I throw in this ring? Uh, I'd give you $60.
Wait -- higher? Lower? W-what? This ring -- this ring is worth $500! I-I don't trust you.
I don't trust you to -- to look through all of our loot.
No, you're a con artist, scamming people to mail their gold in so you can rob them of their possessions! I resent that! When a customer decides to send a necklace or a ring to me, that item clearly doesn't have much personal value to them anymore.
I still don't trust the guy.
Oh, my God.
I don't have time for a long, drawn-out negotiation w-with -- w-with a pair of robbers! I need the coins.
That's what I want -- the Double Eagle coins.
Double Eagles.
Double Eagles.
He's talking about some rare coins that are worth Wow.
Please.
Please.
We can split the money.
Oh, my God.
Milo sold the coins to the guy on the other end of this call.
He's a horrible human being.
Eats flies.
Kills puppies.
You'd probably love him.
Help me, somebody.
Hello? Ohh, no.
No, no, no.
Everything -- everything's cool.
Milo? You want to talk to -- to Milo? M-Milo's, uh busy.
Why? What? No, no, no.
Look, look, look.
I will sort this out, and I will call you back.
The buyer says that he's already talked with someone else who says they have the coins.
Be ready to move.
You already gave the coins to someone else.
This this is some kind of trap.
Frank! Heel! Heel! The dog! Frank! The evidence! Frank! You mean me! Stop! Frank! Frank! Frank! Here, boy! Come on! Frank! Oh, God.
Oh, God.
I don't understand.
Are -- are you a good guy or a bad guy? Jerry Cooper, you're under arrest.
For what?! Oh, for about 48 hours.
I don't understand.
Do you have the coins or not? What'd you call those coins again? The Double Eagles.
A $20 gold coin minted in 1933 but never monetized.
The coins were supposed to be destroyed.
So, how do these exist, sir? A small but unknown number were stolen before the melt, which means any 1933 Double Eagle out there, regardless of how it was acquired, is property stolen from the U.
S.
government, which, oddly enough, is why they are valued so highly.
Yeah, at $8 million apiece.
Jerry said he had two of them.
Which is why I'm about to wake up some of my people.
If you'll excuse me a minute, Chief.
So the $500,000 in the Goldibucks' account must have been a down payment.
Chief, Jerry's buyer keeps calling.
But his number's blocked, and I've been pinging individual cell towers -- Chief, it smells like the evidence might be on the way.
Ohh.
Liz Why don't you and I take Frank for another walk? That's not a bad idea.
He's getting that expression on his face.
Thank you so much.
How can I help, Chief? You can carry the evidence bag for Captain Raydor.
Oh, okay.
If we can't trace the call, we'll have to have Jerry pick it up.
Lieutenant.
Lieutenant! Oh.
Yeah, yeah, right.
Yeah.
Hello, Jerry.
You guys entrapped me.
Sorry about that, but we needed to find out what was in the safe.
So why don't you tell me how you ended up with two stolen I did not steal them.
Some woman mailed them into Goldibucks.
And I'm sure you gave her a fair price.
Milo paid her, and she cashed her check, even sent us a thank-you note, okay? So not stolen.
Now that we've got that sorted out, can I go? Unfortunately, Jerry, it's illegal to even possess the Double Eagles.
Damn it! Milo said no one would care.
But you do.
People care.
We also know that you were planning on selling those coins to the person on the other end of this blocked call.
Not me! Milo! Milo was planning to sell them, and, okay, he was going to pay me for recognizing their value, but it was all him.
And now he's dead.
I told him, "cut back on the bacon.
Why not try margarine on your steak instead of butter?" The people who gave Milo that heart attack and robbed your store are about to sell the coins themselves.
Now, we have frozen your accounts, Jerry boy.
So what do you think's going to happen when Milo's buyer finds out that you can't repay the $500,000 that he advanced you? You're in danger now, Jerry, so you'd better answer that phone the next time it rings and ask Milo's buyer if he's met with the robbers.
Or don't pick up, and I'll answer it and tell him you're cooperating with the police.
Just -- just I'm dead, dead.
Speak.
Hey, Viktor.
What's up? "What's up," Jerry? "What's up?" Milo tells me you guys have the coins.
You show me the coins, you take my $500,000, and now Milo is not answering his phone.
And another thief I deal with is calling me, saying that he and his lady friend have the coins.
So let me ask you, Jerry the idiot, what's up? Um tell me, Viktor, these other guys, did they show you the Eagles? I'm meeting with them tomorrow at 9:00 a.
m.
at my gallery.
How about you meet with us, too? Either they have the coins or you do, and if you don't, then bring me my money.
Anything else, and I'll kill you.
Sound good? Tomorrow at 9:00.
Can I just check my calendar? Tell him you'll be there.
No! I don't have the coins or the money.
That means he'll kill me.
You won't be there alone.
You'll be perfectly safe.
Jerry? Jerry, you there? Sorry.
Reception.
Uh, anyway, turns out I'm completely free.
I'll be there.
Oh, hey, Chief.
Guess what.
Frank dropped the kids off at the pool.
What does that mean? No sign of Clyde yet, but we're so close to Bonnie, we can smell it.
We've got the glove.
Eww.
Um, I'll start working on a print.
I've got this feeling that she's already in the system.
Oh, thank you so much, Sharon.
No problem, Chief.
Lieutenant Tao, Detective Sanchez, I'm incredibly sorry to ask you this, but do you mind helping Captain Raydor? Sure.
Good dog, Frank.
That may be the last wonderful, loving thing he ever does.
All my hopes for him were bound up with that ring.
Now what do we do? Look, um, after we clear things up with Jerry tomorrow, I'll get you what that ring is really worth.
I promise.
I don't think I can do this.
You're perfectly safe.
As soon as the people who robbed your store show up with the Double Eagles, we'll arrest everyone.
And I'll be with you the whole time.
Viktor Markov is never gonna believe that I would date someone like you.
Why not? He's a much better appraiser than I am.
And he's never gonna believe that one of me is worth any of you.
You underestimate yourself.
Right now I can't think of anyone else on earth I'd rather be with than you.
Nowgo on.
Jerry.
And no Milo.
Milo doesn't close deals.
I do.
I see you've been spending your money, huh? And your name, dear? It's Brenda.
What a lovely gallery you have.
The pieces are amazin'.
So you brought a date.
But did you bring the Double Eagles? Yep, I brought them.
May I see them? Well, we need to discuss a price first.
The price has been set at $8 million.
This was agreed upon and is non-negotiable.
Any other previously discussed issues you'd like to raise? Oh, how wonderful to see you again.
Jerry says he has the coins.
I don't know what scam he's trying to pull, but they're right here.
Those are them, the Double Eagles.
Thank you, Jerry.
So let me properly introduce myself.
I'm Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson, L.
A.
P.
D.
, and y'all are under arrest! Don't move! Down on the ground! Down on the ground! Do it now! Not you, Jerry.
You're gonna meet my husband.
Your husband? Yes.
Chief, got Clyde, but there's no sign of Bonnie.
Let's read him his rights and see if he'll talk to us.
Chief, meet Paul Woods.
He was a chemistry teacher at West Calvin High School before being laid off three years ago.
Been unemployed ever since.
That's a big hole in your résumé, sir.
Let's talk about where all that time has gone.
Sure.
But let's do it with a lawyer, over lunch.
Seriously, I'm hypoglycemic, and I need to eat soon.
Okay.
He had the Double Eagle coins on him? That's five years right there.
Plus what he'll get for impersonating an officer.
Milo died of a heart attack because Clyde was robbing his store.
I want him for murder.
We got her.
We got Bonnie.
Her name's Audrey Rangle, and they're bringing her right out.
The print came out? We had to match it up with some partials we found at the crime scene.
A typical fingerprint has 10 points, but -- now, this is very interesting.
It worked.
All right, uh, lieutenants, Liz, is this the woman from Goldibucks? Uh, I thought she had more of a glow.
I need to see one with her hands.
Oh, for God's sake.
Oh, yeah.
That's her.
Yeah, no doubt in my mind, Chief.
It's definitely the same young woman.
Thank you.
Is she a cop? She was a lawyer, which is why she had an m-number print on file and why she was also able to write up such a realistic warrant.
She lost her job in real estate in 2008.
She's asked for an attorney.
Great.
So neither one of them's talking.
Yeah, but they don't know that.
Detective Gabriel.
Lieutenant Flynn, Paul said he was very hungry.
Oh, would you like us to take his lunch order? That's a great idea.
Keep him busy for five minutes.
It'll take at least that long to go through our list of specials.
Thank you.
Liz, uh, you need to come out.
You don't want Frank to see this.
Okay, so, I'm obviously missing something here.
How is taking a lunch order going to get her to talk to us? Quiet.
You'll spoil everything.
Hello, there.
I know you've asked for a lawyer, which was very smart, by the way, so I can't question you, but, um, while we're waiting, I'd love for you to have a seat so I can show you something, Mrs.
Woods.
Oh, I'm sorry.
It's Miss Rangle, not Mrs.
woods.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I just assumed that you two were married.
That will make this easier.
Write all this down.
I'm not repeating it.
You guys really have a chef in the building? What do you think, we order takeout? We're the police.
He can handle detailed orders? I got major gluten allergies.
Oh.
Yeah, well, you just make sure everything on our menu list ends up on this notepad.
Paul is talking to us, Audrey, and because you're not married, he can testify against you.
He wouldn't do that.
Now, I think we'll start with a list of our wheat-free alternatives.
Go for it.
First, we have a quinoa pasta.
Mmm.
Now, that can go with several sauces.
I can't ask you this, so ask yourself, how were we able to find you so quickly after arresting Mr.
Woods? And we have vegetarian lasagna a very nice chicken parmesan.
You have vegetarian lasagna and chicken parmesan that is gluten-free? He's saying the murder was all your fault.
Murder? Don't say anything.
We're not letting you get away with a homicide because we broke the Miranda warning.
Yeah, we like to get convictions for people who savagely beat elderly store owners to death.
Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait.
We -- we did not beat anyone.
Stop talking, Audrey, you've asked for a lawyer.
Well, then I revoke until he gets here because we did not beat that man up.
Okay, yes, we came in and we flashed our badges.
Yes, okay.
We did that.
But that old guy, he just keeled over.
Okay, we -- we didn't beat him.
We tried to give him CPR.
He just died.
There -- there was no murder.
It was a heart attack.
A heart attack that happened during the commission of a felony.
As an attorney, you're familiar with the felony murder rule, yes? Uh what is that, again? Hello, again.
You -- we could have had something special, and now So, is that his confession? No.
He wouldn't talk.
This is what's for lunch.
I can't believe I had to beg Pope to investigate this murder with you.
It's hard being close to people you work with.
It's always hard.
You got to be patient with people who drive you crazy.
I find that good relationships sometimes depend on what you're willing to overlook.
Chief? This is the last of the forged art we found at the Markov Gallery.
Okay, good.
Um, let's just move it out of the way so that Frank can't get to it, please.
And, uh, these, Chief? The FBI will take those.
What'd you do with Jerry Cooper? I believe you mean John Q.
Smith.
I've never met anyone so excited to join the Witness Protection program.
Can I see the gold coins? Oh, I'm sorry, miss.
That's government property.
So now all government property is suddenly off-limits to me? Well, not all.
Liz, the department owes you a thank-you for all you've done.
You're welcome, Andy.
Oh, and if you ever want to just vent, we all get together every couple of months.
Who's we? Louie's other wives.
We think of you as the fifth.
I should leave if I'm gonna make this vet appointment for Frank.
Were you able to find the right amount of money for the ring? I'm buying it from you, since I'm the only one that it meant anything to.
Oh, stop! It means something to me.
It reminds me of that very special day when we officially went from two people who loved each other to husband and wife.
And when I look at it, I-I also see our children and our grandkids and the life we might have had.
Butyou'll still take the check.
Yes.
Oh! II think that'll take care of Frank's medical bills for a while.
Oh -- and, uh, here.
I own it now.
So keep it safe.
Oh, Louie.
You know, after we get Frank home, I could drive you to McClure's, and if you buy me dinner, I'll even sit at the bar and watch you drink for a few hours.
Well, if you need the company.
Why don't you pick it up? 'Cause I know who's calling, and I don't want to talk to her.
Yeah, but what if it's an emergency? Then she ought to call 911, not me.
Flynn, hey.
Why don't we, uh, go down to McClure's for the early-bird special? You know, hang out at the bar for the game.
Hang out at the bar.
So, what's in it for me? You can watch me get drunk.
You know, uh, carpooling has its trade-offs.
If you live your life on the wagon, now and then you have to drive it.
Stop calling me.
Excuse me, Lieutenant Provenza, sir.
There's someone here to see you.
What's the matter, Louie? Your phone doesn't sound broken to me.
Liz.
I called you a million times.
Which wife is Liz, again? His third? I told you, no family at work under any circumstances.
That's definitely Heather.
Not our kids, not our grandkids, and certainly not you.
You want to talk to me, call me at home.
Me and Flynn are out of here.
"Flynn and I.
" "Flynn and I are out of here.
" Louie, this is an emergency.
Correcting his grammar.
Wow.
His very first ex.
Okay, Liz.
What's this about? I had to sell my wedding ring.
And in our divorce settlement, it says you paid $500 for it.
Wait a minute.
You sold our wedding ring? And do you know how much I got for it, Louie? $49? Uh-huh.
$49.
You mailed the ring to a place called Goldibucks?! Goldibucks is a legitimate business.
They advertise on TV.
And, frankly, I have to have the money.
Now.
Hey, Liz.
Is everything okay? No, it's not.
It's Frank.
He's sick.
His asthma is getting worse.
He needs Insulin twice a day.
His blood pressure is through the roof, and it's getting harder and harder to pay for his prescriptions.
Oh, Liz, I'm so sorry.
Flynn.
Frank is just a dog.
Would you call him "just a dog" in front of your grandkids? Liz, please.
God, don't start an argument here.
We finally found an arrangement that makes our relationship very strong.
What are you talking about? We barely see each other.
That's the arrangement.
Look, look.
I found the address for this Goldibucks place.
It's only We'll go down there right now and get the ring back, which I can't believe you sold.
Doesn't our wedding ring mean anything to you at all? Of course it does.
Here, I'll show you what it means.
You know, you're right, Liz.
Frank doesn't sound too good.
Doesn't look so hot, either.
This dog's still ugly as sin.
What can I say? I have a type.
But thank you for taking me to the gold store in an actual police car.
Ah.
You know, in the 10 years Louie and I were married, he never once let me do a ride-along.
Really? Want to turn on the siren? Could I? Oh, God.
Yeah, yeah.
Just hit that switch right there.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Frank, baby, calm down.
Yeah, yeah, turn that off.
Don't get overexcited.
Turn that damn siren off! Okay, okay, okay.
That dog! I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it.
Easy back there.
Think about your blood pressure.
You better be talking to this dog.
It's nice to see he wasn't just an asshole at home.
Oh, you have no idea.
Come on, baby.
Come on.
So, what's the plan? The plan is to give whatever scam artist owns this place a good old-fashioned what for! Oh, sorry.
We're -- we're closing.
Oh, well, uh Uh, yeah.
Anyway, uh I would like to see someone about thischeck.
Oh.
Okay.
Well, just give me one moment and let me see if there's anything I can do.
Are you allowed to show your badge? I don't want you breaking any laws.
The constitution demands that to enter a place of business on a legal call, you -- Liz, Liz, please.
Please.
If you want your money back, let me handle it! Ah.
Oh.
Man.
How can you work with all that racket? It's just temporary.
We're putting in a new security system.
Yeah, so, what exactly can I help you guys with? Well, first off, I'm sure a sweet-looking girl like yourself had nothing to do with it, but we -- But -- but someone here didn't give this poor old lady the proper payment for her ring.
Oh.
And if you could help us out, we'd be very grateful.
Okay, yeah.
Uh, Liz Provenza.
Mm-hmm.
Well, I can't write you a check, but let me see if I can find your jewelry and return it to you.
Give me one sec.
Liz Provenza, Liz Provenza.
Ah, well, she's gone to the back to get the ring, and your constitution is still sacred.
What the hell is he doing -- rooting for truffles? Liz Provenza.
Got it.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Beautifuland quick.
Oh, sorry.
Did anybody ever tell you that you have an amazing smile? Good lord.
What? She does.
Thank you.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
Oh, we're just -- we have to lock the door.
Bye.
Oh.
Okay.
Sure.
Bye.
See you.
If you want to sell the ring so bad So badly.
All right, so badly -- so badly, I-I know a guy in the jewelry business who will give us what the ring is actually worth.
One minute.
Frank needs to stretch his legs.
His legs are 5 inches long.
Do you hear how bad Frank is wheezing? Just write her a check, already.
I've written her I bought the house that she and that dog live in.
No more checks.
Louie? Isn't that the woman who was helping us? She said they were locking up.
Whoa, whoa.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
All the jewelry -- it's gone.
Oh, God.
Don't jump to any conclusions.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Liz, Liz, for heaven's sakes! Frank, come back! That woman, she pulled off a glove.
Don't eat that, Frank.
No, Frank.
Give me the glove.
Oh, no, Frank.
No.
Give me the glove.
No, no, Frank.
No, Frank.
Give me the glove.
No, Frank, no.
Frank.
Frank, Frankie.
Come on, Frank.
No.
That rubber glove was worn by a robber in a robbery that we let happen.
No, no, no, no.
Small-time robbery.
No big deal.
Chief -- no.
Not yet.
Lieutenant Tao? Victim's name tag reads "Milo Billings.
" His Facebook page is up on his computer -- says he's 64 years old.
I didn't see any wounds, but Kendall found broken ribs.
Maybe it was cardiac arrest during the robbery, which would make this murder.
If I could just explain -- I saidnot yet.
Detective Gabriel.
Yeah, well, uh, Milo's name is all over these business documents.
They have him listed here as the owner.
Yeah, well, I can -- What part of "not yet" are you misunderstanding? Detective Sanchez.
You see the cords, Chief? These feed from four security cameras connected to a hard drive that used to be there.
Well, at least we won't have to watch video of you two on the news ignoring a robbery and a murder.
Okay, your turn.
What happened? Okay, Chief, when we arrived here, there was a girl behind the counter, who we thought was an employee, packing up for the night.
She was packing up, all right.
And neither of you saw or heard anything that would indicate there was a robbery going on? They were drilling the safe while you were here?! Okay, in our defense, Chief, the girl said she was installing a new security system.
Does she have a name? How about a description? Oh, well, uh, she was pretty.
Uh, yeah.
Sexy, even.
Yeah, she was cute.
Nice legs.
Yeah.
She was 5'9", looked between 28 and 32, wore a brunette wig, blue eyes -- could have been contacts.
The only time we saw her male partner was when they were running away.
Uh, Chief, this is my first ex-wife, Liz, and -- and her dog, Frank.
We came here to get back a ring that she sold by mail.
It's a pleasure, Liz, andFrank.
There is some good news, Chief.
The female thief, she dropped a latex glove.
Now, with any luck, we'll be able to get a print off the inside of it.
Okay.
Where's the glove? Well, it's, uh, temporarily unavailable, but I assure you it will show up in a day or so.
The dog, uh Frank ate the glove.
Shut up, Frank.
Lieutenant Tao, do you think it's possible that the glove will make it through in a usable fashion? Drug mules use balloons made out of this material all the time.
All right, look, uh We need to hang on to Frank here, so -- You can't hold Frank.
He has a doctor's appointment tomorrow afternoon.
This is a violation of his civil rights.
Liz.
Liz, dogs do not have civil rights.
Their owners do.
You can't impound my dog without my permission.
All right, look -- we need to keep Frank, so, Liz, maybe you could stay with us, too, if you don't mind? I'll help any way I can.
Frank truly needs someone who will pay attention to him.
Chief, I found a search warrant.
So you came here with your ex-wife and a warrant? No, no.
Wait a minute.
That -- that's not our warrant, no.
Uh, Chief, I don't think this warrant is legit.
Why? Because it's signed by a Judge Judy.
The suspects identified themselves as L.
A.
P.
D.
officers with badges and guns.
They produce a warrant, they seize all the gold in the store, saying that they need to examine it for stolen property, then they take the surveillance footage, and I know all this because PSB has been investigating these robberies for three months.
It still doesn't mean these guys are cops.
Anyone can download a warrant off the Internet.
But the warrant that was left behind today demonstrates a professional understanding of the law, and I can't afford to just hope that these people are thieves impersonating officers.
She's right.
She can't.
So, the case belongs to Professional Standards.
I see no reason for Major Crimes to be involved.
Excuse me? You haven't heard chief Johnson's side of things.
This robbery was significantly different than the others, which is why I think that Chief Johnson and Major Crimes should be involved.
Significantly different how? The thieves were interrupted and left their tools behind.
Interrupted by whom? I'll get back to that.
Lieutenants Flynn and Provenza.
And there was a murder.
I thought the victim died of a heart attack.
During the commission of a felony, which makes this a murder.
Is there any way I can just avoid asking this question? No.
No, there isn't.
Okay.
Flynn and Provenza witnessed a robbery/murder without stopping it or collecting any evidence? Uh, the female robber took off her latex glove.
So we do have fingerprints? We're having to wait on that.
Why are we waiting? I'm the Chief of Police.
I'll call the Prints section, and we'll put a rush on it.
The glove is not with prints section.
Of course not.
Where is it? Lieutenant Provenza's ex-wife Liz was with him at the store, and her dog, Frank.
Frank got to the glove first and consumed it.
So, if I'm understanding you correctly, and I fear that I do, Lieutenant Provenza's ex-wife's dog ate the evidence.
And we're -- we're having to wait for it to reappear.
All right, you know what, Captain? If this is what you really want, then fine.
You continue investigating the robberies, and Major Crimes can handle the homicide.
But I want you, Chief Johnson, to work together and to share information.
And please remember how the words "together" and "share" are traditionally defined.
When will Frank be done with the glove? Sometime in the next 24 hours, according to Dr.
Morales' best guess.
Is there any way to speed this up? Laxatives.
Frank's too sick for that.
All right, then.
We wait.
So, what do we know about our victim, Milo Billings? Okay, he's been arrested a couple times over the last 20 years, mostly low-level con jobs.
He's basically a street-scam artist.
Milo found a way to steal with a storefront.
So he decided to cash in on the gold craze.
So he and his partner, Jerry Cooper, they opened up Goldibucks two years ago.
Yeah, preying on desperate, gullible divorcées.
Are we talking about your dating life? Uh, Detective Gabriel, I need to speak to the victim's partner, Jerry Cooper, as quickly as possible, please.
Hello, everyone.
In the interest of sharing, here's all the info on the previous gold-store robberies that PSB's been working on.
We haven't been able to identify the thieves, so we're calling them Bonnie and Clyde.
Did you guys check your stolen-inventory list with pawnshops, ma'am? Yes, but nothing's turned up so far.
Gold has an extremely low melting point.
All Bonnie and Clyde would need is a pot, a blowtorch, and some Borax to turn their loot into gold bars.
Why don't you let me take care of where the gold goes, and you concentrate on the murder? It's all one thing to me.
Look, if we don't go about this property, the thieves will say that the victim was dead when they broke into the store and that they tried to revive him.
We have to get the right kind of confession to call this a murder.
Uh, Chief? The victim's partner, Jerry Cooper -- he's on his way up.
Do you want him in interview room 1? You found Mr.
Cooper already? No, I didn't find him.
He came in on his own.
Oh, all right, then.
I guess I'll go talk to him.
Chief, shouldn't I interview this person with you? Uh, why don't you go on ahead, and I'll be right there.
Thank you.
Why do you think Mr.
Cooper showed up here on his own? Because Milo said the cops raided us.
Milo said that? When did you talk to Mr.
Billings? Well, I was on the phone with him when the cops came into our store.
Listen to me -- "our store.
" Technically, we're 50/50, but I'd say Milo was more in charge, if you had to pick, like, a totally responsible party.
So if there were things that didn't belong at Goldibucks, they're Milo's.
I wouldn't even know about them.
Mr.
Cooper, what exactly did Milo say to you on the phone? That two cops were in the store with a warrant, insisting we had stolen property, which, if we did, that would be Milo's.
This is very important, Mr.
Cooper.
Did Milo describe the police officers who entered your store? Just that they were a man and a woman.
Why aren't you asking Milo what they looked like? He was there.
Mr.
Cooper, I'm sorry to inform you that your partner, Milo, died of a heart attack today when your store was robbed.
What? You're t-t telling me We were robbed?! Oh, my God.
Tell me.
What did they take? Did you hear the part about your partner dying of a heart attack? Yeah, yeah.
Very sad.
His diet, you wouldn't believe, but the inventory -- what's missing? Oh, my God.
It -- it looks like everything in the display cases.
Okay, that's not so bad.
We're insured for that.
What else? The stuff in the back room.
The back room?! That's worse, but also insured.
And? The safe was cleared out.
They took everything in the safe? Not the safe.
Oh, my God.
Mr.
Cooper, what was in the safe? What was in the safe? What was in the safe? Uh, um nothing much.
My personal valuables, a baseball card, my birth certificate a picture of me with Bruce Willis.
Do you have a Valium or a Xanax? Like the 50-milligram kind I take when my parents visit? Buzz, can you, uh, put me through to the Chief, please? Sure thing.
Uh, Chief, I need to talk to you about some of Goldibucks' recent financial transactions.
Okay, you -- you have to help me get my stuff back.
I need to go on the news, talk to the robbers.
You let victims do that, right? When they've lost a child, Mr.
Cooper, not a bracelet.
Mr.
Cooper, if there was something specific in that safe, something unique, and you could describe it to us, we would have a much better chance of finding those thieves.
So, if you do find my stuff, you have to look at all of it? You can't just h-hand it back to me? Captain Raydor, why don't you explain to Jerry here how he is now in the center of our ongoing investigation.
Pardon me.
We believe that the people who robbed Goldibucks are either police impersonators or police officers acting illegally.
Well, that's even more against the law.
Isn't it? What's this guy's criminal record? Okay, so, financials for Goldibucks were pretty consistent up until about a week ago, when they received a half-million-dollar wire transfer from the Cayman Islands.
Freeze those accounts, Detective.
That money is connected to something that was in the Goldibucks safe, something that Jerry clearly wants, and it's not his Bruce Willis photo.
Um, Jerry has no criminal or violent history, and Raydor has been telling him that police officers might be involved.
I'm listening, Lieutenant.
Well, if -- if you need a dirty cop, Chief, I'm at your service.
Well, I could direct Jerry to your house, but he'll be showing up to make a deal with a crooked cop and his female partner.
Oh, no.
Never.
Not -- not in a million years.
I spent 10 years in the same house with that woman, and -- and that is just never -- You have no choice.
Lieutenant, right now, where you go, Frank goes, and where Frank goes Louie, I swear, I don't know how you live with this smell.
This smell is your dog.
All I'm getting is wheezing.
I will admit, Louie, there are times I miss you -- when we get together with our kids and our grandkids and you laugh.
I always did love your laugh.
It might have been interesting to have gotten through the rough patches just to see how we would have ended up.
Well And there are parts of our relationship that always worked.
Oh, yeah.
Mm.
And I'm sure there must be things you miss about me, too.
Oh, yes, of course.
Uh, look.
I can show you right now what I miss the most.
I turned off the wire.
We're alone.
I could kill the lights.
And we probably got a good five minutes.
And what would we do with the other four? Jerry's approaching the house.
Here we go.
Okay.
I've got audio now.
Yes? Who is it? Jerry Cooper.
Y-you robbed my store today.
Oh, God.
Don't beat me up.
I'm here to offer you a deal.
Get in here! Get up here.
Good boy! All right, he's not wearing a wire.
No wires.
He's not carrying a gun, so take your positions.
All right, sit.
Sit down in this chair right now! What are you doing at my house, accusing me of being a robber? God, no, no, no.
I don't care what you did at Goldibucks today.
I'm insured.
And so my business partner died.
He was a criminal, like you.
No offense.
I am just an unemployed appraiser who got caught up in the wrong crowd, and all I need, really, is for you to give me back two little things you stole, before you melt the rest down.
Which two little things? Good.
See? We're already bargaining.
That's great.
All right, I should tell you that for those two little things, I will pay you $10,000.
$10,000? Okay, okay.
$25,000.
$25,000.
What two items are we talking about? That was quick.
What are we dealing with here? Show me what you stole, and I'll pick them out.
Oh, no.
No.
You're trying to lowball us.
All right, Liz.
Melt everything.
D-d-don't do that! You don't know the value of what you have.
I'm the expert here.
Oh.
Oh.
You're the expert, are you? All right.
How much, uh, if I throw in this ring? Uh, I'd give you $60.
Wait -- higher? Lower? W-what? This ring -- this ring is worth $500! I-I don't trust you.
I don't trust you to -- to look through all of our loot.
No, you're a con artist, scamming people to mail their gold in so you can rob them of their possessions! I resent that! When a customer decides to send a necklace or a ring to me, that item clearly doesn't have much personal value to them anymore.
I still don't trust the guy.
Oh, my God.
I don't have time for a long, drawn-out negotiation w-with -- w-with a pair of robbers! I need the coins.
That's what I want -- the Double Eagle coins.
Double Eagles.
Double Eagles.
He's talking about some rare coins that are worth Wow.
Please.
Please.
We can split the money.
Oh, my God.
Milo sold the coins to the guy on the other end of this call.
He's a horrible human being.
Eats flies.
Kills puppies.
You'd probably love him.
Help me, somebody.
Hello? Ohh, no.
No, no, no.
Everything -- everything's cool.
Milo? You want to talk to -- to Milo? M-Milo's, uh busy.
Why? What? No, no, no.
Look, look, look.
I will sort this out, and I will call you back.
The buyer says that he's already talked with someone else who says they have the coins.
Be ready to move.
You already gave the coins to someone else.
This this is some kind of trap.
Frank! Heel! Heel! The dog! Frank! The evidence! Frank! You mean me! Stop! Frank! Frank! Frank! Here, boy! Come on! Frank! Oh, God.
Oh, God.
I don't understand.
Are -- are you a good guy or a bad guy? Jerry Cooper, you're under arrest.
For what?! Oh, for about 48 hours.
I don't understand.
Do you have the coins or not? What'd you call those coins again? The Double Eagles.
A $20 gold coin minted in 1933 but never monetized.
The coins were supposed to be destroyed.
So, how do these exist, sir? A small but unknown number were stolen before the melt, which means any 1933 Double Eagle out there, regardless of how it was acquired, is property stolen from the U.
S.
government, which, oddly enough, is why they are valued so highly.
Yeah, at $8 million apiece.
Jerry said he had two of them.
Which is why I'm about to wake up some of my people.
If you'll excuse me a minute, Chief.
So the $500,000 in the Goldibucks' account must have been a down payment.
Chief, Jerry's buyer keeps calling.
But his number's blocked, and I've been pinging individual cell towers -- Chief, it smells like the evidence might be on the way.
Ohh.
Liz Why don't you and I take Frank for another walk? That's not a bad idea.
He's getting that expression on his face.
Thank you so much.
How can I help, Chief? You can carry the evidence bag for Captain Raydor.
Oh, okay.
If we can't trace the call, we'll have to have Jerry pick it up.
Lieutenant.
Lieutenant! Oh.
Yeah, yeah, right.
Yeah.
Hello, Jerry.
You guys entrapped me.
Sorry about that, but we needed to find out what was in the safe.
So why don't you tell me how you ended up with two stolen I did not steal them.
Some woman mailed them into Goldibucks.
And I'm sure you gave her a fair price.
Milo paid her, and she cashed her check, even sent us a thank-you note, okay? So not stolen.
Now that we've got that sorted out, can I go? Unfortunately, Jerry, it's illegal to even possess the Double Eagles.
Damn it! Milo said no one would care.
But you do.
People care.
We also know that you were planning on selling those coins to the person on the other end of this blocked call.
Not me! Milo! Milo was planning to sell them, and, okay, he was going to pay me for recognizing their value, but it was all him.
And now he's dead.
I told him, "cut back on the bacon.
Why not try margarine on your steak instead of butter?" The people who gave Milo that heart attack and robbed your store are about to sell the coins themselves.
Now, we have frozen your accounts, Jerry boy.
So what do you think's going to happen when Milo's buyer finds out that you can't repay the $500,000 that he advanced you? You're in danger now, Jerry, so you'd better answer that phone the next time it rings and ask Milo's buyer if he's met with the robbers.
Or don't pick up, and I'll answer it and tell him you're cooperating with the police.
Just -- just I'm dead, dead.
Speak.
Hey, Viktor.
What's up? "What's up," Jerry? "What's up?" Milo tells me you guys have the coins.
You show me the coins, you take my $500,000, and now Milo is not answering his phone.
And another thief I deal with is calling me, saying that he and his lady friend have the coins.
So let me ask you, Jerry the idiot, what's up? Um tell me, Viktor, these other guys, did they show you the Eagles? I'm meeting with them tomorrow at 9:00 a.
m.
at my gallery.
How about you meet with us, too? Either they have the coins or you do, and if you don't, then bring me my money.
Anything else, and I'll kill you.
Sound good? Tomorrow at 9:00.
Can I just check my calendar? Tell him you'll be there.
No! I don't have the coins or the money.
That means he'll kill me.
You won't be there alone.
You'll be perfectly safe.
Jerry? Jerry, you there? Sorry.
Reception.
Uh, anyway, turns out I'm completely free.
I'll be there.
Oh, hey, Chief.
Guess what.
Frank dropped the kids off at the pool.
What does that mean? No sign of Clyde yet, but we're so close to Bonnie, we can smell it.
We've got the glove.
Eww.
Um, I'll start working on a print.
I've got this feeling that she's already in the system.
Oh, thank you so much, Sharon.
No problem, Chief.
Lieutenant Tao, Detective Sanchez, I'm incredibly sorry to ask you this, but do you mind helping Captain Raydor? Sure.
Good dog, Frank.
That may be the last wonderful, loving thing he ever does.
All my hopes for him were bound up with that ring.
Now what do we do? Look, um, after we clear things up with Jerry tomorrow, I'll get you what that ring is really worth.
I promise.
I don't think I can do this.
You're perfectly safe.
As soon as the people who robbed your store show up with the Double Eagles, we'll arrest everyone.
And I'll be with you the whole time.
Viktor Markov is never gonna believe that I would date someone like you.
Why not? He's a much better appraiser than I am.
And he's never gonna believe that one of me is worth any of you.
You underestimate yourself.
Right now I can't think of anyone else on earth I'd rather be with than you.
Nowgo on.
Jerry.
And no Milo.
Milo doesn't close deals.
I do.
I see you've been spending your money, huh? And your name, dear? It's Brenda.
What a lovely gallery you have.
The pieces are amazin'.
So you brought a date.
But did you bring the Double Eagles? Yep, I brought them.
May I see them? Well, we need to discuss a price first.
The price has been set at $8 million.
This was agreed upon and is non-negotiable.
Any other previously discussed issues you'd like to raise? Oh, how wonderful to see you again.
Jerry says he has the coins.
I don't know what scam he's trying to pull, but they're right here.
Those are them, the Double Eagles.
Thank you, Jerry.
So let me properly introduce myself.
I'm Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson, L.
A.
P.
D.
, and y'all are under arrest! Don't move! Down on the ground! Down on the ground! Do it now! Not you, Jerry.
You're gonna meet my husband.
Your husband? Yes.
Chief, got Clyde, but there's no sign of Bonnie.
Let's read him his rights and see if he'll talk to us.
Chief, meet Paul Woods.
He was a chemistry teacher at West Calvin High School before being laid off three years ago.
Been unemployed ever since.
That's a big hole in your résumé, sir.
Let's talk about where all that time has gone.
Sure.
But let's do it with a lawyer, over lunch.
Seriously, I'm hypoglycemic, and I need to eat soon.
Okay.
He had the Double Eagle coins on him? That's five years right there.
Plus what he'll get for impersonating an officer.
Milo died of a heart attack because Clyde was robbing his store.
I want him for murder.
We got her.
We got Bonnie.
Her name's Audrey Rangle, and they're bringing her right out.
The print came out? We had to match it up with some partials we found at the crime scene.
A typical fingerprint has 10 points, but -- now, this is very interesting.
It worked.
All right, uh, lieutenants, Liz, is this the woman from Goldibucks? Uh, I thought she had more of a glow.
I need to see one with her hands.
Oh, for God's sake.
Oh, yeah.
That's her.
Yeah, no doubt in my mind, Chief.
It's definitely the same young woman.
Thank you.
Is she a cop? She was a lawyer, which is why she had an m-number print on file and why she was also able to write up such a realistic warrant.
She lost her job in real estate in 2008.
She's asked for an attorney.
Great.
So neither one of them's talking.
Yeah, but they don't know that.
Detective Gabriel.
Lieutenant Flynn, Paul said he was very hungry.
Oh, would you like us to take his lunch order? That's a great idea.
Keep him busy for five minutes.
It'll take at least that long to go through our list of specials.
Thank you.
Liz, uh, you need to come out.
You don't want Frank to see this.
Okay, so, I'm obviously missing something here.
How is taking a lunch order going to get her to talk to us? Quiet.
You'll spoil everything.
Hello, there.
I know you've asked for a lawyer, which was very smart, by the way, so I can't question you, but, um, while we're waiting, I'd love for you to have a seat so I can show you something, Mrs.
Woods.
Oh, I'm sorry.
It's Miss Rangle, not Mrs.
woods.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I just assumed that you two were married.
That will make this easier.
Write all this down.
I'm not repeating it.
You guys really have a chef in the building? What do you think, we order takeout? We're the police.
He can handle detailed orders? I got major gluten allergies.
Oh.
Yeah, well, you just make sure everything on our menu list ends up on this notepad.
Paul is talking to us, Audrey, and because you're not married, he can testify against you.
He wouldn't do that.
Now, I think we'll start with a list of our wheat-free alternatives.
Go for it.
First, we have a quinoa pasta.
Mmm.
Now, that can go with several sauces.
I can't ask you this, so ask yourself, how were we able to find you so quickly after arresting Mr.
Woods? And we have vegetarian lasagna a very nice chicken parmesan.
You have vegetarian lasagna and chicken parmesan that is gluten-free? He's saying the murder was all your fault.
Murder? Don't say anything.
We're not letting you get away with a homicide because we broke the Miranda warning.
Yeah, we like to get convictions for people who savagely beat elderly store owners to death.
Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait.
We -- we did not beat anyone.
Stop talking, Audrey, you've asked for a lawyer.
Well, then I revoke until he gets here because we did not beat that man up.
Okay, yes, we came in and we flashed our badges.
Yes, okay.
We did that.
But that old guy, he just keeled over.
Okay, we -- we didn't beat him.
We tried to give him CPR.
He just died.
There -- there was no murder.
It was a heart attack.
A heart attack that happened during the commission of a felony.
As an attorney, you're familiar with the felony murder rule, yes? Uh what is that, again? Hello, again.
You -- we could have had something special, and now So, is that his confession? No.
He wouldn't talk.
This is what's for lunch.
I can't believe I had to beg Pope to investigate this murder with you.
It's hard being close to people you work with.
It's always hard.
You got to be patient with people who drive you crazy.
I find that good relationships sometimes depend on what you're willing to overlook.
Chief? This is the last of the forged art we found at the Markov Gallery.
Okay, good.
Um, let's just move it out of the way so that Frank can't get to it, please.
And, uh, these, Chief? The FBI will take those.
What'd you do with Jerry Cooper? I believe you mean John Q.
Smith.
I've never met anyone so excited to join the Witness Protection program.
Can I see the gold coins? Oh, I'm sorry, miss.
That's government property.
So now all government property is suddenly off-limits to me? Well, not all.
Liz, the department owes you a thank-you for all you've done.
You're welcome, Andy.
Oh, and if you ever want to just vent, we all get together every couple of months.
Who's we? Louie's other wives.
We think of you as the fifth.
I should leave if I'm gonna make this vet appointment for Frank.
Were you able to find the right amount of money for the ring? I'm buying it from you, since I'm the only one that it meant anything to.
Oh, stop! It means something to me.
It reminds me of that very special day when we officially went from two people who loved each other to husband and wife.
And when I look at it, I-I also see our children and our grandkids and the life we might have had.
Butyou'll still take the check.
Yes.
Oh! II think that'll take care of Frank's medical bills for a while.
Oh -- and, uh, here.
I own it now.
So keep it safe.
Oh, Louie.
You know, after we get Frank home, I could drive you to McClure's, and if you buy me dinner, I'll even sit at the bar and watch you drink for a few hours.
Well, if you need the company.