Grey's Anatomy s07e22 Episode Script

I always said I'd be happier alone.
I'd have my work, my friends.
But someone in your life all the time? - More trouble than it's worth.
- OK.
Crib goes here.
Apparently, I got over it.
Changing table will go right here.
But you can't plan a baby room before you have a baby.
I mean, you're gonna jinx the adoption.
The social worker wants to see where we live.
This is like a death-trap.
I'm trying to create a reasonable distraction.
- Hello? - Janet! Welcome! How are you? Thanks for coming out.
Oh, be careful.
Watch those nails.
Perfect for a baby, right? Hm I'm gonna stop in the lab.
I'll see you after the intake, OK? OK.
Oh, God.
I forgot it was the Hobarts today.
It always bums me out when we have an Alzheimer's patient with young kids.
There's no shame in sitting this one out.
I can do the intake.
Stop treating me like I'm your wife.
On the trial, I'm a colleague.
I'm allowed to say, "It bums me out.
" It doesn't mean you have to feed me warm milk and run a bath.
Treat me like a doctor.
Right.
Sorry.
OK.
Go do the intake, colleague.
Shepherd, you got a minute? I need to talk to you about your trial.
Oh, um I should get Meredith.
I just got a lecture on the failure to extend professional courtesy to one's spouse.
I think it's best you don't get Meredith.
You're in, in very good hands.
I still feel bad that I'm not gonna be here.
For the surgery? I'll be unconscious, that's not when I'm gonna miss you.
- OK.
Then I guess I won't - You can feel bad about all the time that follows.
When I'm not under general anesthesia, and you're still not here, you're halfway around the world with Arnold.
- Andrew.
- Ah - Excuse me? - He's a rock star.
I kind of feel like the sound of an adoring crowd should follow his name.
I don't Is that a compliment or an insult? I don't know, I guess it depends on how you feel about rock stars.
- OK, well, Andrew's not a rock star - Ah OK, you know what? Can you stop that? It's starting to get annoying.
My wife's leaving, I'm allowed to be annoying.
I'm not a real wife, so that doesn't buy for a lot of bad behavior.
Well, you're my real best friend, what does that get me? - I'm sorry.
- Don't be.
Go be happy.
With Andrew.
Ah You're impossible.
Yeah.
You, too.
Meredith, tell me exactly what you did.
- I can't tell you.
- We can still fix this, - but I need to know what you did.
- If I tell you, it'll make it worse.
- It's worse already.
Meredith - Listen, I I love you.
And I'm sorry, but I can't tell you anything.
You want to be treated like a colleague? I'm gonna treat you like a colleague.
Alex Karev informed Dr.
Hunt that Dr.
Grey tampered with my clinical trial.
She switched around the placebos and the drugs, probably invalidating my trial.
- Is this true? - Nothing I did has any effect - Tell me exactly what happened.
- I can't do that.
Do you have any idea what you've done? You think the FDA will get anywhere near this hospital ever again? Meredith, look at me.
If this is wrong, if there is something going on, if Karev is exaggerating, this is the part where you have to tell me.
This is the part where you have to deny the charges.
Kick me off the study.
There's nothing wrong with the study.
- Nothing I did changes anything.
- But you're not denying it.
I'm gonna have to investigate what's going on here, but it looks to me like you just lost your job.
So they're probably gonna fire me.
Are you happy? So they're probably gonna fire me.
Are you happy? - Come on, they're not gonna - I want your crap out of my house by the end of the day.
What the hell was that? A 757 went down in the Sound.
We're looking at about We're the designated crisis center.
Families will be instructed to come here to find their loved ones.
We are activating Surge Protocol.
Dr.
Hunt is gonna be running the show.
It's gonna be chaotic.
You need to listen carefully, you need to stay focused, do not contribute to the panic.
Get to your stations.
Dr.
Bailey, clear any beds that we can.
Discharge or transfer.
OK.
Uh, Grey.
All right, Torres, you'll be with me.
Kepner, set up the ER for triage.
Other Grey, I want you running the family center.
Take over in the cafeteria.
Yang, blood bank.
- We might need a Candyman.
- Dr.
Sloan'll be our Candyman.
Let's be liberal with pain meds for our victims and sedatives for patients that we're moving.
Avery, you can help him out.
- Let's move, people! - What happened with Meredith? - Cristina, I can't - Owen! She tampered with Shepherd's study, invalidated the results.
She destroyed the whole thing.
There was a plane crash.
They're gonna cancel your procedure and try to send you home.
You need to tell them that you're a D-1.
You don't need to be in pre-op, but you want to be moved to a regular room.
That way, when the hospital starts doing surgery again, - you'll be first in the queue.
- Don't you have a plane? - Wait, did they shut down the airport? - No, but we're not leaving till it's over.
They need surgeons and trauma counselors.
These are your films.
They're gonna schedule your surgery at Seattle Presbyterian.
Seattle Pres can't take anymore, - start calling County! - Avery! Why'd you give me that guy in the middle of a mass trauma? - Avery? - The kid quit Webber's study.
What kind of idiot decides working with the chief of surgery's too taxing on his schedule? He didn't quit 'cause he thinks it's too much hard work.
He quit because he thinks the chief has a shot at a Harper Avery.
He was worried that if his name was on it, it would kill Webber's chances.
- Kepner! Discharges.
- Yep.
You know, she's the only one who ever gave a rat's ass about you.
And now you might have destroyed her career.
You should find some skanky intern to love you, 'cause next time you're in a burning building, no one is handing you a glass of water.
Please make sure you give us a cell phone number - Matthew Ruiz? Do you? - No one from the flight has arrived.
- As soon as we get - Do you have a list of people - they're bringing to the hospital? - It can take Emergency Services quite a long time to move and identify people in a situation like this.
- Please, just try to be patient.
- I'm sorry, my wife was on the plane.
- Can you please just? - Sir, at this point we don't have any information.
Please, just sign the sheets.
I'd like to speak to your supervisor, somebody that knows what's going on.
Ma'am, my supervisor doesn't have any information.
Nobody has any information.
Please, just sign the sheet.
Dr.
Hunt! I had way too many drinks before I told you that.
- I didn't mean for - Not now, Karev.
Look, I told you that because I didn't think she should be chief resident, - not that she should be fired.
- If you didn't think this through, then you're as dumb as she is.
Hey.
You OK? Yeah, I'm fine.
Uh The plane was from Baltimore, where my parents live.
I've taken that flight, uh with my son.
You want to come sit down with me for a minute? - No, no, no.
- I can't, uh, there's too much, uh OK.
Um I'm just gonna stand here for a minute.
Is that all right? - Are you on any medications? - No.
- Ever given blood before? - Nope.
- Any chance you're pregnant? - Mm - I don't know.
- When was your last period? I'm not sure.
Uh, what were you doing, um, last time you had to deal with tampons? Like, maybe it was St.
Patrick's Day, and you ate, uh, four green donuts and thought, "Wow, that's disgusting, I must be hormonal.
" Oh, my gosh, you're right! Except it was these gross cookies with green frosting.
But that was a while ago.
Uh, I guess I had mine again around Easter, 'cause I was all over the Marshmallow Peeps.
It totally works! Hey! What the hell?! It looks about six weeks to me.
It looks about six weeks to me.
Ahem.
I take it this wasn't deliberate.
- No.
- OK.
You want to talk about options? No.
Officials say it's too early to speculate on the cause of the crash.
But here's what we do know.
The flight originated this morning in Baltimore carrying 183 passengers and 18 crew members Still nobody? The families are going crazy.
What is taking so long? Fishing 200 people out of the water is slow business.
You want to play Angry Birds? They'll do triage at the waterfront.
Takes time.
Actually, with it taking this long, there's gonna be a lot of hypothermia.
- Kepner! - Yeah.
Warm blankets, heated lamps - and heated IV fluids.
Got it.
- You post chief resident yet? - No.
Not yet.
- What's the hold up? - The suspense ain't killing me.
- It's gonna be Grey.
Karev made a great play for it.
A plane full of orphans? - That's pretty impressive.
- He's already decided, - you don't have to lobby for your boy.
- Karev.
I want a written account of exactly what you saw.
Every detail.
- When, where - Sir, I don't think I don't want to know what you think.
I need more sedatives.
The people we're transferring are starting to freak out.
You're a good man, Avery.
Lexie's yours.
Take her.
Take care of her.
- I'll stay out of your way.
- I kind of already have her, but thank you? - You're welcome.
I need to talk to you.
You know, I think I'm gonna order pizza.
If you want I can get the I'm pregnant.
- Cristina.
- I cannot believe this is happening.
I know.
I know it's complicated.
I know it wasn't supposed to happen like this, but Cristina, this could be something What? No.
There is no way we're doing this.
Do you hear me? - Cristina - No, I am not this beautiful vessel for all that might be good about the future.
I am not carrying your hopes and dreams, no! I get to talk! I'm here! There's two of us.
We are a partnership.
Can we just think together? Is that OK? I know who you are.
I know what you want.
I love you.
I don't love the incubating potential of your womb, I love you.
Why would I want to do something that would make you miserable? You think I love you more when you're miserable? Do you think I want that? You running off to Meredith? You think I'm looking for more of that? - But I think there's a way - No! No! I still get to talk.
There is a way to make this work without it ruining your life or derailing your career.
I don't want a baby.
Well, you have one.
Are - Are you getting all lifey on me? - How late are you? - That does not matter! - Of course it matters.
OK, fine.
You tell me when life begins.
You know, I can't wait to hear this one.
I don't know.
Does it have hands? - I cannot believe you're doing this! - I'm just asking a question.
I don't want one.
I don't hate children.
I respect children.
I think they should have parents who want them.
I want them.
I want them, and maybe you could, too.
I believe your life can be bigger than you think it is.
I know you can contain more than you think you can.
I'm not saying we do this.
I'm just saying let's think.
Let's see what kind of life we can imagine.
Cristina Yang I imagine such a huge life for us.
This is an extremely serious accusation, Meredith.
- Can't you tell me anything? - I can't, I'm sorry.
Talk to me.
How many patients are we talking about here? - Did this happen more than once? - I can't say that either.
- She can't say anything.
- We're gonna unwind this, Meredith.
Karev is figuring out what cases he was on when he saw you.
He'll narrow down the dates, we know which patients Nothing I did changed the trial.
- Fire me, do whatever you have - You don't get to choose, OK? You don't get to decide who gets the drug or the placebo.
You don't get to decide what information the trial gets.
Anything I tell you affects the trial.
If you don't know what I did, - the trial stays blind.
- The trial is over.
You screwed me, you screwed this hospital and you screwed yourself.
This is your disease we're trying to cure.
- I could have picked Parkinson's - It was Adele.
but I I did this for you.
- Derek.
It was Adele.
Uh, maybe I should put some IV fluids in the heater? Warm them up? - No.
- But if people have been in the water - for that long, they'll be - April.
- But if we just - No one's coming.
If it's taking this long, nobody survived.
What are you gonna do? - I don't know.
- The protocol is fairly clear.
- I don't know.
- The protocol is fairly clear.
Are you encouraging him to fire me? Derek, I basically pressured her to do it.
You'd have to fire us both.
I'm gonna have to suspend you, so it doesn't look so bad.
The study I need to turn the whole mess over to the FDA, let them figure out what to do with it.
I can't - Meredith, I don't know how to - I know.
Emergency Services has begun identifying bodies.
They've given us a list.
The airline reps are on their way, we've got social workers here, and more coming.
It's a long list.
Each of you have families to inform.
So, uh, please be outside the cafeteria in exactly one hour.
You'll call one family at a time, and you'll be assigned a room to take them to and deliver the news.
It's gonna be a long day.
That's it.
Dr.
Hunt, you gave chief resident to Kepner? It was supposed to be me or Grey! You think anyone's gonna listen to Kepner? - It's gonna be complete chaos.
- Think anyone's gonna listen to you? You just sold out the one universally liked individual at this hospital.
Everyone is gonna hate you.
Chief resident's supposed to manage peers, be a resource and support.
After what you did, do you think anyone is gonna come to you for anything? I was planning to give it to you.
But now So it's possible that it won't ever That we just we just won't get the treatment? - It's a possibility.
Yes.
Oh, my God.
This isn't right.
We're so close.
He needs this! Can you just? - Is it killing people? - No.
- So give it to him anyway! - I wish we could.
No, don't give me that! You can, and you're choosing not to! - Audrey.
- No! They say there's nothing they can do? There's a drug in a box in this hospital.
You were on the schedule! My children's father is disappearing! Give him the damn drug! I could take a leave for six months or a year.
- No, you couldn't.
- Sure, I could.
They're not gonna fire me.
- No! - Stop saying no! I'm telling you, I want this, I can do this.
This does not have to be your problem.
It'll be my problem.
- You wouldn't even - What, notice? Lt'll be a baby! I'm not a monster.
If I have a baby, I'll I'll love it! That's the problem.
That you'll love it.
That's a problem that we can work with.
- I'm sorry, are you laughing right now? - No.
No, I'm just I'm not.
I just - I love you.
- What is so? - Are you even listening to me? - Yes.
I'm just trying to figure out some kind of a compromise.
You know what? There is no compromise.
You don't have half a baby! I don't want one! OK, it isn't about work, this isn't a scheduling conflict.
- I don't wanna be a mother! - Cristina, do you love me? - Of course I do.
- Do you trust me? - I Yes! - You'd be a great mother.
You would.
I know you don't believe me, but it is true.
Just sit with this for a little while, this terrible idea that you might love a baby.
Just, for me, sit with it.
Did you even hear? OK.
Why would I do that? Because you love me.
You love me.
That's why.
I have three names.
I don't think I can do this three times.
One foot in front of the other.
I've got something that'll cheer you up.
Sloan gave us his blessing.
Well, that's not really right, more like he gave you to me, which was nice.
- Are you serious? - Yep.
I probably owe him a goat.
- OK.
- All right.
Let's do it.
Is the Schoman family here? Jessica and Maxwell? Jason Schoman, he's our son.
I'm Dr.
Altman.
Will you follow me, please? They think it's good news.
Elaine Chen.
Ma'am, I'm Dr.
Sloan.
Why don't you come with me.
- Gilda and Miguel Ruiz? - This is a nightmare.
- Hi, I'm Dr.
Bailey.
- Come with me, please.
I can't wait to see her face.
Hey.
I brought some pudding.
That's why you're here? I've got a good nurse, she'll hook me up with pudding.
I know.
It's just I just spent the last two hours telling people their family members were dead.
And I needed to I just wanted to say hi.
Or bye.
Again.
I don't know I really tried to be a gentleman about all this.
But now you need to get the hell out.
- What are you doing? - Letting you go was the worst thing I've ever done.
It's the most painful thing I've ever done, and I'm a guy who's had 82 surgeries.
My threshold for pain is pretty high.
You need to get out! I'm not your best bud.
I'm not your security blanket.
I'm a man who's in love with you, who waltzed you into the arms of a damn knight on a horse.
So go to Germany, and have little spaetzle-eating children, and please, for God's sakes, leave me alone.
Cafeteria is pandemonium.
Wailing people everywhere.
You admitting anyone? We're signing in a few so we can give 'em sedatives.
That's about it.
ER.
There's a survivor.
- You leaving? - No.
I didn't get fired.
- I know that's disappointing to you.
- My trial is about to disappear.
You really want to act like I'm the bad guy here? - No, I don't.
- I know the fact that it is Adele changes things for Richard, but it doesn't for me.
- Oh, I understand that.
- You couldn't possibly understand that.
If you were focused on the millions of people with Alzheimer's whose lives could've been different, would've been better because of this drug, there's no way in hell you would've pulled this stunt.
How is it that you don't know the difference between right and wrong? Because I don't think that things are simply right or wrong.
Things are more complicated than that.
This was more complicated than that.
It's complicated that it was Adele and Richard.
It's complicated that we have a drug in a box that could help her.
There's nothing simple about that.
I am very sorry that I messed everything up.
But I would do it again.
I don't know how to raise a child with someone who doesn't understand that there's a a right and a wrong in the world.
So now I'm gonna be a bad mother, that's where we're going with this? You've been saying it for weeks.
Maybe you're right.
OK.
Maybe you're right.
I just need some time to think.
I just need some space.
Sarah Gordon, GCS at six, head injury and multiple contusions to mid torso.
- Systolic 70s in the field.
- Unaccompanied minor? - Yeah, she was flying alone.
- On my count.
One, two, three.
OK, I need X-ray in here.
We need to shoot a C-spine, chest - Abdomen's rigid.
- I've got the ultrasound.
Large hematoma on the left temporal lobe.
- Folks, we've got eyes.
- Sarah, I'm Dr.
Shepherd.
You see all these people around you? They're doctors.
You ever seen this many doctors before? Don't worry, we're all here to take care of you, OK? Hey, honey.
They found his body.
Because his wallet was still in his pocket.
They said because the impact.
I don't know, maybe it was fast.
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
There's no battery.
I'm pushing the button, I don't hear anything.
- Honey, let me try.
- The battery is dead! - What are you gonna try? - OK, OK, OK, OK, OK.
Ma'am, can I help you? We have to call someone, but the cell phone's not working.
OK, well we have phones that you can use.
Jenny? I'll do it.
I'll do it.
Why don't you take a seat? Excuse me.
Is the Gordon family here? The Gordons? - They found somebody? - A little girl.
Unaccompanied minor.
- They're operating on her right now.
- Thank you.
We should go home, honey.
A little girl made it.
She's alive.
I think we should stay.
She doesn't have anyone.
Her parents aren't here yet.
- I think we should stay.
- Gilda.
If Matthew had been I would like to stay.
OK, OK.
We'll stay.
I'll, um I will let you know how she's doing.
- Mer.
- The adoption lady's paging me, Derek's AWOL, he's not even speaking to me.
Wait.
Is it true? What were you thinking? I was thinking that the chief's wife was about to have saline injected in her brain instead of a drug that could stop her from becoming a gorked-out lump.
Derek's head almost exploded.
- Are they gonna fire you? - I'm suspended.
The chief backed way off when he found out it was Adele.
- I did what I had to do.
- Meredith I couldn't live with myself if I'd done anything different.
And Karev is trying to ruin my life! Mer.
- What did you say to her? - I didn't say anything.
- Janet, anything he says - Can you shut up for one second? This isn't about that.
We're granting you temporary custody of Zola.
Pending the completion of the petition, at which point, assuming all goes well, you'll be granted permanent custody.
And her doctor here says she's doing great.
So you can take her home.
Today.
Her incisions look fine.
She's tolerating a normal diet.
She'll need neuro follow-ups.
She's still on antibiotics.
Here's a prescription for any pain meds she might need, but she's been fine the last couple of days.
Do you have any questions about anything? Meredith, do you have any questions? - Hey.
- Hi.
- You done? - Uh, no, no.
I still have some more families.
Sorry I paged you, I just wanted to see your face.
I think when something like this happens, you just You want to be with someone that you love.
So we're booked on a 9am flight tomorrow.
Let's just spend the night in some fancy hotel, just never get out of the bath.
You OK? Derek, I understand that you don't want to talk to me, but this is important.
I need to talk to you.
I'm your wife.
You need to call me back.
Does anyone know where there's a nurse or an information person? - She should be right back.
- My daughter was in the crash.
They said she had to have surgery.
Are we supposed to? - You're Mrs.
Gordon.
- Yes.
Sarah Gordon is my They're still operating.
The doctors have been here every half hour.
- They'll be here any minute.
- Say, would you like some coffee? - I'll get it.
- Here, sit down.
- You must have been driving like crazy.
- I don't under Are you? We heard she was alone.
I thought, as a parent, if my child was here alone, I We all thought that she should have someone pulling for her.
Thank you.
That's incredible.
Diapers.
Swaddle blankets.
And formula.
These little bottles are good for the diaper bag.
- You have a diaper bag? - No.
We'll get you one, we've got a few in the NICU closet.
We have all this gear.
The parents come in, the baby doesn't make it, they don't want to see the stuff, so they just leave it behind.
Now, here's the pacifiers.
She likes the green ones.
Is your husband putting the car seat in the car? I don't have a car seat.
I'm not even sure I have a husband.
Surgeons, right? You probably forget what he looks like without a mask.
We'll get you one.
You're probably gonna need a portacrib, too.
I'm gonna throw in some more diaper cream.
She went with her dad to visit her grandparents.
He had to stay, so he put her on the plane.
And there was a flight attendant that watched her, and was supposed to walk her to her connecting flight in Vancouver.
You never imagine I'm sorry.
I never even asked, you had someone on the plane.
My son, Matthew.
Is he in surgery, too? Yes.
- Will he be OK? - Yes.
He will.
Sarah's out of surgery.
You can come see her now.
I'm gonna pray for your son.
Hey.
Can you stand up? - I thought I was pretty clear, Teddy.
- Just shut up and stand up.
I have to do something and I can't do it while you're lying in a hospital bed.
I don't want a goodbye hug.
It's gonna make you feel better, - it's not gonna make me feel - Can you just stand up? You're my husband, and and I think I'm falling in love with you.
Hey.
How you doing? - Not now, Mark.
- Come on, Lexie.
- You've been in the dead zone all day.
- You have to stop.
You gotta stop talking to me and checking on me and talking to my boyfriend.
I love you, and I'm always gonna love you.
But I don't want to love you, I want to be happy.
And Jackson makes me happy, and if you keep pulling at me, I'm I'll come back to you.
You're right.
I'm sorry.
You got what you wanted.
You wanted a family.
Please, just let me have what I want.
I said you're right.
I told Avery I was letting you go.
- Did he tell you that part? - Yeah, it's paternalistic and weird.
I'm letting you go, Lexie.
That means you gotta walk away.
Chief friggin' resident.
Unbelievable.
- I'm sorry.
- What? Don't be.
You deserve it.
I'm happy.
- I have what I want.
- It's been such a crappy year.
I can't believe we're both happy.
I can't believe they like me enough to make me chief resident.
They hated me for so long.
I can't believe I actually have friends here.
Well, they're gonna hate you again.
It's now your job to boss them around.
You know how much they love that.
Oh, God.
Is that true? That's true! OK, so this is the house.
There's another house, where you're gonna have your own room, but that, right now, is just wood and no walls, so we're gonna stay here for a while.
Derek? OK.
He might be AWOL, he's had a bad day and he's a little pissed off right now, but we're gonna be fine.
So we had a big plan if this ever worked out.
We were gonna have a lullaby from Malawi to make everything feel homey for you.
To be honest, right now I can't even think of an American lullaby.
Lexie? You know, a lot of people live here.
It gets kind of crazy sometimes, and it's usually not this quiet.
Alex? OK.
We're gonna be OK.
You and I, we're a team, right? We're tough.
We have that in common.
I am very glad you're here.
I didn't think your first day was gonna be quite like this.
But I'm gonna get it together, and we are gonna figure it out.
Tell me how much you love me.
I I love you a very great deal.
A lot.
You love me so much.
I want you to remember that.
I made an appointment to terminate the pregnancy.
- You - I'm sorry if this upsets you.
I'm sorry if this isn't what you wanted, but I cannot talk about it anymore.
I need to lie down.
I feel like crap.
This is a marriage.
I tied my life to you.
You don't decide this without me! - Do you see me standing here? - My head is killing me.
You give in a marriage, you make sacrifices.
I have made many.
And I am asking you to do something for me.
Could you simply consider doing something for me? Have a baby? This isn't pizza versus Thai, you don't give a little on a baby.
- Cristina, I am asking you - I'm saying no! Get out.
Are you? Because I'm denying you a baby Because you denied me part of the decision.
Because you denied me a marriage.
- Oh, how dare you! - Get out! - Hi.
- Hey.
I'm gonna go.
I just wanted to say good night.
I wanna come home with you.
N No, I can't.
Um, Tuck's with me tonight.
I can meet your son.
I'm not gonna bite your son.
No, it's just not the right time.
- I can't - This is a relationship.
Things today were bad.
We lean on each other when things are bad.
That information's not gonna hurt your child.
And if it does, then this is not the right relationship for me.
I can control myself in your house.
I'm not gonna touch you.
- OK.
- You can tell him I'm your friend.
- Tell him whatever you need to.
- OK! OK.
Oh.
I was hoping you were Derek.
Sorry.
Well, he took off, and the hospital gave me a baby.
She's upstairs sleeping in some dead kid's portacrib.
Wow.
Uh I'm getting an abortion and Owen just kicked me out of my house.
- What? You're? - Pregnant.
- And you're? - Getting an abortion.
Well Why didn't you tell me? You had a busy, busy day.
There's a reason I said I'd be happy alone.
- Come upstairs.
I need help.
- I I can't.
I've gotta lie down.
It wasn't 'cause I thought I'd be happy alone.
It was because I thought if I loved someone, and then it fell apart I might not make it.
Tell me not to go to Africa.
Alex.
Go to hell.
It's easier to be alone.
Because what if you learn that you need love and then you don't have it? What if you like it? And lean on it? What if you shape your life around it, and then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage.
It's like dying.
The only difference is death ends.
This it could go on forever.