Father Brown (2013) s08e01 Episode Script

1 BELL TOLLS # And did those feet in ancient time Walk upon England's mountains green It seems a bit snug, Mrs McCarthy.
There.
That wasn't so difficult now, was it? I just wanted to wish you all the best.
And I will be praying for you.
Thank you, Father.
We'll need it.
Ah, Kembleford! I have to say, how brave of you all to come back after last year.
Well done, you! We got the lowest marks in the history of the competition.
We've been working very hard since then, I can assure you.
As have the Hambleston Harmonisers.
We might be reigning champions, but one can't rest on one's laurels.
Break a leg.
Well, I think you are going to be marvellous.
ORGAN PLAYS THEY APPLAUD Thank you to the Salperton Songbirds! Next, ladies and gentlemen, we have the Kembleford Choristers.
# O Sanctissima! # O Piissima! # Dulcis Virgo Maria! # Mater amata # Intemerata # Ora # Ora pro nobis THEY APPLAUD The moment of truth.
Which three of our Gloucestershire entrants will be progressing to the Grand Final of the Three Counties Choir Competition, to be held here, in Worcester Cathedral, next weekend? Whatever happens, you have done Kembleford proud.
Hear, hear.
The three Gloucestershire finalists are .
.
Shepherd Magna.
Last year's champions, the Hambleston Harmonisers.
And last but not least I still can't believe you came back all this way just for the final.
Mrs M would never have forgiven me if I'd missed it.
I've never seen her in such a tizz.
You are a good friend.
And fortunately, Monty had some business in London and the timing was perfect.
Now, not so bad, if I say so myself.
Indeed.
And I'm not the greatest admirer of the humble omnibus.
In fact, perhaps we should take your car.
Oh, you know perfectly well that Mrs M wants us to all travel together.
She's terrified that something bad will happen if she lets us out of her sight.
I'm sure you're right.
And, for her sake, I shall rough it just this once.
THEY LAUGH Ah! There you are! You excited about your big day? Exasperated, more like.
Harriet Whitley has dropped out.
Dropped out? Why? She claims to have picked up a stomach bug and says she can't get out of bed.
The rules state clearly that each choir must have six members.
Three men and three women.
What will you do? Well, don't look at me.
My music teacher once paid me to bunk off on the day of the school concert.
She said that my soprano could be used as an offensive weapon.
No! SHE TUTS KNOCK ON DOOR Right, then, sir, I'm going.
Going? Yes, sir, my afternoon off.
Afternoon off?! For the choir competition, sir.
I did tell you .
.
on several occasions.
What time is it? Just gone quarter to 12, sir.
Is there a problem, sir? My daughter's performing in the competition with her youth choir.
How exciting for her.
Isn't it just? That's why I promised the wife, under pain of death, that I'd be back in time to go with them.
Only it slipped my mind, what with all these burglaries.
I'm sure she'll understand, sir.
You know, duty calls, and all that.
Understand? I'll be in the doghouse so long, I'll have to get the postman to start delivering my mail there! Well, you could come with us on the bus, sir.
There's bound to be a spare seat.
Are you sure there's room? The more, the merrier, sir, you know? You might have to put up with us practising some of our songs, but, well That's all right, Goodfellow.
I knew I wouldn't escape punishment entirely.
No doubt they will be here soon.
When I was choir leader, I'd instruct everyone to be here at least ten minutes early.
Well, I'm choir leader now, and I'm sure they are on their way.
Now, there they are.
My apologies, Mrs McCarthy.
Where have you been? Sorry, Mother.
My fault.
I wanted to show Nicholas some hotel brochures for the honeymoon.
Waste of money, in my opinion.
My Henry and I made do with a slap-up meal at the Red Lion.
He was back at the factory next morning.
Yes, well, Audrey deserves the best.
Setting up home together isn't cheap, you know.
But, as you're friends, I'll give you a special discount on our bumper pack of cleaning products.
It has everything you need for a sparkling home.
Well, we'll definitely think about it, Wesley.
Promise.
I already have everything we need.
And the soap he sold me last week left stains all over my basin.
No, that can't be right.
My products are top-of-the-range.
Afternoon.
I hope you don't mind.
I offered the Inspector a lift.
Why ever would I mind? Hello, everyone.
Mr Summerton.
Inspector.
Good to see you again.
Oh, Audrey .
.
these are for you.
They were left on the presbytery doorstep.
INSPECTOR SNEEZES Did I mention that I hate buses? Who's been sending you flowers? They're from the children in my class, silly, to wish me good luck.
Now that everyone is here, I've a very important announcement to make.
We have received news from Canon Fox that the winner of the competition will get to perform at this year's Royal Variety Performance at the London Coliseum, in front of Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth.
Now, there will be a lot of press there today, so, I beg you, on your best behaviour, all of you.
Whenever are we not, Mrs M? All right Derek, we're ready to go.
Right you are.
Hm.
Help yourself, sir.
No, thank you, Goodfellow.
I know what fate awaits me when I see my wife and daughter in Worcester.
I don't want my last meal to be a stale, half-eaten teacake! Now, I want you all back in the bus in five minutes.
What have I said to you about smoking? You two need to take care of your voices! Sorry, Mrs McCarthy.
I've been smoking since I was knee-high to a grasshopper, Mrs McCarthy.
One more's not going to make any difference.
Er, I wanted to have a word about our robes.
Did you see what Hambleston were wearing last week? I don't wish to look like anybody's impoverished cousin.
Lawrence Ashton is chaplain at HMP Sonning.
Now, he has a whole prison full of ladies with nothing better to do than make robes for him.
Whereas I, on the other hand, had to sew all the robes myself.
And that's very much appreciated.
But if, by some miracle, we were to win, we might wish to improve our choral-wear prior to performing for the Queen.
Yes, well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
Does anyone know who's in there? Because they are taking an age.
Did you knock? Yes, but no-one answered.
Oh.
CLATTERING WOMAN SQUEALS Anybody in there? Goodfellow, barge this door down.
Let me try.
I've got a new hypothesis about the Kembleford burglar.
LOCK CLUNKS And you've no memory of what happened? Not really.
I thought I heard something outside the window, so I opened it to take a look.
And the next thing I remember is all of you standing above me.
Do you think it's possible that you just fainted? Maybe.
I don't know.
It's all so embarrassing.
We should get you checked out.
Oh, no, I'm fine, really.
Right, come along, come along.
We don't want to be late, do we? Excuse me Cigarette.
Good.
Now, we're all here.
HORN HONKS HORN HONKS MAGPIE CACKLES Derek, let us be on our way.
ENGINE TURNS OVER IT STRUGGLES ENGINE STARTS # .
.
but Thou art mighty # Hold me with Thy powerful hand # Bread of heaven, bread of heaven # Feed me till I want no more Want no more Feed me till I want no more.
ENGINE BACKFIRES The fuel pipe has been punctured.
How can it be punctured?! Something could've kicked up off the road.
If not that, then The Hambleston Harmonisers.
They were there.
Oh, come on, Mrs M.
You honestly think they'd stoop to sabotage? No, I suppose not.
Can you fix it? Not without a replacement part.
The pressure's too high on that side of the fuel inlet for us to tape it up.
We wouldn't even make it to the next village, let alone Worcester.
You all wait here.
Goodfellow and I will walk along the road until we find a house with a telephone.
We'll call for a mechanic and And how long is that going to take? I wanted to be in Worcester by four o'clock.
There is another solution.
We could leave the coach and the driver here and walk to Lower Swaddling.
It can't be more than two miles, and it's a stop on the Worcester line.
Then we could catch a train the rest of the way.
Yes.
Now, everyone, gather up your music and the hampers.
Look at me, Father.
A couple of miles in these shoes? Er I told you we should have brought your car! My point is, Father, that cleanliness is next to godliness, am I right? And an official endorsement from the church would be doing me a massive favour.
Well, I'll certainly consider it.
That's all I ask! I didn't like to say anything in front of Mrs M as she's in enough of a flap already, but I do think the coach was sabotaged.
The fuel pipe looked like it had been sawn through with a knife.
But why would anyone want to do that? To stop us getting to Worcester, take out the competition.
Perhaps the same person was responsible for what happened to Audrey.
She is Kembleford's star performer, after all.
That's true.
And, seeing as Hambleston just happened to be passing by the scene of the crime It could have been anyone.
For now, it's best to assume that they were regrettable accidents.
Whilst keeping our eyes open for anything suspicious? Could you please pick up the pace? We're going as fast as we can.
If we miss this train, we'll never get to Worcester in time.
Hardly our fault.
And what's that supposed to mean? We never had any trouble with the old bus company.
It was you who decided to find a cheaper option.
FLY BUZZES Perhaps it would be quicker if we went across country.
How do we even know that's the right way? Well, the Cotswolds Way heads straight for Lower Swaddling as the crow flies.
Anything to get this over with.
Come on.
What are you doing now? I thought I might stay here, try and flag down a passing car, preferably one with a picnic basket and a bottle of Champagne.
Please.
You have travelled halfway round the world.
Another mile or two won't make any difference now.
Perhaps a sing-song, help raise morale.
Oh, that's a great idea, Father.
Warm our voices up for later on, eh? Faith Of Our Fathers.
# Faith of our fathers, living still In spite of dungeon, fire and sword You're more than welcome to join in with us, sir, if you like.
No, thank you, Goodfellow.
If You fancy smiting someone with a thunderbolt, be my guest.
You'd be doing me a favour.
The competition starts promptly at five o'clock with a performance by the Three Counties Children's Choir.
You're on third, after the Throckmorton Veterans' Choir.
Thank you.
You're with the Children's Choir, I take it? Yes.
This all looks fine.
Welcome to Worcester, Miss Mallory.
Thank you.
# Faith of our fathers, holy faith We will be true to thee till death MAN: Over here! Oh, well, at least we've got one fan.
He looks very enthusiastic.
MAN: Look out behind you! I think he's trying to tell us something.
I think I know what that is.
SHE SCREAMS Don't startle it! Oh! Sorry.
Force of habit.
Everybody start moving very slowly towards the gate.
Yes.
BULL LOWS ANGRILY My father taught me an old trick to deal with situations like this.
What was that? Make sure you get a head start on everyone else.
Wait up! Oh! Oh, my shoe.
Leave it! For all we know, it could be made out of his cousin.
What-ho! Oh! Ah! Oh! What's wrong, Mother? I think I may have sprained my ankle.
Well, I guess that's it, then.
Mrs Curtley can hardly walk to Lower Swaddling with a sprained ankle.
Not to mention the rain.
Or my lack of footwear.
I feel terrible about what I did.
And so you should.
I panicked.
I'm sorry.
Let me go and find help, make it up to you all.
No.
No, I think it's best I insist! Nicholas, please, just leave me be! Don't be like that.
Audrey! Anything I can do to help? I wish.
Pre-marriage nerves are not uncommon.
The course of true love.
I thought true love was about being honest with each other.
You know, anything you say to me is between us and God.
I found this picture, in Audrey's house, of her when she was younger, with this .
.
other fella.
She'd told me she'd never been with anyone else.
So, I asked her about it.
And what did she say? That it was her brother.
She's never mentioned a brother till now.
And when I asked her some questions about him, she wouldn't say a word.
Now's she's in a mood with me for not trusting her.
Do you? Trust her? I want to.
I I love her, I really do.
It's just, what What if the flowers? I'm being daft, aren't I? I should go find her.
Chin up, sir.
Could be worse.
Worse? We're stuck in a stinking barn in the middle of nowhere.
I should never have agreed to get on that bloomin' bus in the first place.
I was only trying to help, sir.
Look, it's not just the rollicking I'll be getting off the wife.
You know what this job is like.
When it comes to the kids, I've missed a lot of .
.
you know .
.
important moments.
I wanted to be there for this one.
You never know, sir.
We might still make it.
Let's face it, Goodfellow, it would take a miracle.
WOMAN SCREAMS Well, don't look at me! Maybe it would be wise if we all just went home.
And give in to some bully? Never! Let's be sensible, Mrs M.
Barbara can't walk, I've got one shoe, and, even if we do make it to Lower Swaddling, we'll never catch the train.
Oh, yes, and somebody's threatened to kill us! Here you are! And where have you been? In the woods.
I was looking for Audrey.
I heard the scream, turned back, got a bit lost.
And I saw the writing.
Somebody doesn't want the Kembleford Choristers to perform tonight.
Perhaps you're not keen on Audrey singing in front of the Queen.
Think she'll become a big star and trade you in for a better model? I would never do that! And if you're looking for a suspect, where's Wesley? That's right.
He was having a good old moan in rehearsals about Audrey getting all the best solos.
He seems to think he's the next Nat King Cole.
And he's clearly already well-known to the Inspector.
To be fair, that was a private matter.
He sold the wife a feather duster that was rather too quick to shed its plumage.
Right.
Still, he dropped us all in it with that bull, and now he's done a runner again.
MAN WHISTLES So, he made ready his chariot, and took all his people with him.
I managed to persuade the farmer to give us a lift to the train station.
On the back of that? What fun! That's very kind, sir.
Kind? It cost me a pack of Brillo pads and a tin of boot polish.
But, still, a small price to make amends.
Do you still think we might be able to make that train? Have faith, Mrs McCarthy.
Not to put a dampener on things, but what about Barbara and Aunt Fliss? Well, the Inspector and I can help Mrs Curtley on the back of the trailer.
And, as for the lovely Lady Felicia, I have a present for her.
Oh Belonged to the farmer's wife.
She loved these boots, he said.
She was even wearing them when she passed.
Oh, well I think they rather suit you.
Ah So, you don't think it was Hambleston, after all? How would they find us all the way out here? I reckon one of this lot wrote that message.
Why would one of us want to sabotage our own choir? And why would anyone want to do that to Audrey? FATHER BROWN CLEARS THROA Pray, enlighten us, Padre.
There are a number of possibilities.
Resentment at another's success after they themselves have failed .
.
fear of losing a loved one .
.
anger at not being the centre of attention.
Poppycock.
It'll be about money, mark my words.
Big deal, performing in front of the Queen.
Could lead to lucrative career opportunities.
Someone here has been paid off by a rival choir.
So, what do we do? Keep everyone together and stay alert.
They'll make a mistake.
They always do.
Mr Ashton, how delightful to have you back.
I trust your team are in fine voice.
They would give the cherubim and seraphim a run for their money.
I must say, performing in the West End has always been a lifelong dream.
Ah You haven't seen the Kembleford lot, have you? Time isgetting on.
Can't say that I have.
STEAM ENGINE CHUGS Quick! Would you put your foot down? I suspect, Mrs M, we may already be at top speed.
I'd suggest throwing Inspector Mallory overboard to lighten the load, but I doubt it would make much difference.
TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS Wait here.
Excuse me, was that the Worcester train that's just departed? Sorry? Has the Worcester train left already? Oh, why has Thou forsaken me? The train that has just left, was that the Worcester train? And when is the next one? Oh, I'm really in for it this time, Goodfellow.
There aren't enough chocolates and flowers in the world to save me now.
Goodfellow? Typical.
We've worked so hard.
There's always next year.
Only if we don't get blacklisted.
If it makes you feel any better, at least you're not wearing a dead woman's shoes.
Perhaps we should just head back to Kembleford.
What about the competition? It'll be over before we get there, anyway.
My head hurts, and .
.
I just want to go home.
Were those flowers really from the children? Of course.
So much for singing for the Queen.
Wesley, now's not a really good ti I know what you all think of me.
But, since the day I arrived in this country, all I've done is try to get by.
That such a bad thing? I finally thought I might achieve something.
Win a bit of respect, you know? Who am I kidding? Now, where has Father Brown disappeared to? HORN HONKS Courtesy of the Lower Swaddling Constabulary.
Father Brown's idea.
And they just lent it to you? Turns out I used to play rugby with the Superintendent.
In that case, get out.
I'm driving.
Come on.
Right.
INDISTINCT CHATTER So, then, we are agreed? If the Kembleford Choristers don't arrive by five o'clock That gives them .
.
15 minutes.
SHEEP BLEA What's this? I hope they're the right size.
Wasn't much choice.
Oh! Sergeant! How? Lower Swaddling Police Station.
Please tell me they're not taken from a corpse.
No, nothing like that.
Unclaimed lost property left over from the May Day celebrations.
Sergeant, I am going to personally recommend you for the highest honour the Police Force can bestow.
No need for that, Your Ladyship.
Oh! Right, quick! Everyone, follow me.
Sergeant, do you still have the robes? Now, you can all start getting changed while I go and register.
Father, can you look after Mrs Curtley, see if you can find her a walking stick or something? I need to spend a penny.
Yes, all right, go.
But be quick! The Children's Choir - where are they performing? I'm afraid you've just missed them.
The Kembleford Choristers.
What about them? Well, we're here! Anything I can do to help? No, I don't think so, thank you, Father.
Where's Audrey? Still powdering her nose.
The nerves do tend to play havocwith her digestive system.
We don't all need to hear about it, Nicholas.
Is it just me or are we all wilfully ignoring the fact that someone has threatened to kill us if we sing tonight? I, for one, will not be intimidated by an idle threat.
SHE SCOFFS You weren't that courageous when faced with that bull, Mr Summerton.
I suppose it suits you, all of this.
Even more of a disaster than last year.
You'll be angling for your old job as choir leader back.
What are you implying? Come on, let's not fall out.
We've still got to sing together.
No, you don't.
What do you mean, Mrs M? We've been disqualified.
What?! You! The rules are perfectly clear.
All choirs must register by five o'clock.
Everyone else managed it.
Surely you can make an exception.
While I may have the honour of organising the choir competition, it will not have escaped your notice that we are in an Anglican Cathedral.
I can hardly be seen to show favouritism to a choir from a Catholic church from my own patch.
Surely, you don't The perception of fairness is paramount! And was it fair that our choir had their star singer attacked, or their bus sabotaged? Sabotaged? I Presumably by one of the competitors.
And it would hardly look good on the competition, or the organisers of the competition, if such goings-on were to find their way into the national press.
CONGREGATION APPLAUDS He's going to allow us to sing! Oh, thank the good Lord.
We must hurry.
We're on in a few minutes.
What about Audrey? Oh, don't worry, I'll find her.
Can I help? No.
Find Inspector Mallory.
There's something he should know.
"JERUSALEM" PLAYS IN BACKGROUND FATHER BROWN CLEARS THROA I can't sing.
Well, that is not true.
You know what I mean.
Yes.
How's your head feeling now? A little sore.
Well, it was an awkward window to get through.
After you sabotaged the coach.
WHISPERS: How? There was dirt on the back of your dress when we picked you up off the floor.
Only the floor itself had recently been cleaned.
Your dress got dirty .
.
when you were underneath the coach cutting the fuel line.
But it proved more difficult to climb back in.
I couldn't be sure, of course.
But thenit was you who found the threatening sign on the barn wall.
And you had plenty of time to write it yourself.
What reason could I possibly have? Fear.
You were being threatened by someone who didn't want you to perform.
The envelope was in the bunch of flowers.
It contained a card.
What did the card say? It told you not to come here, didn't it? I recognised the handwriting .
.
from the choir register.
Father, please, just leave me be.
Tell the others to perform without me.
So that your big secret won't come out? That you spent time at Her Majesty's Prison Sonning? Because that's where Lawrence Ashton is chaplain, isn't it? You! Didn't you get my flowers? This is your last chance.
Pull out of the competition or everyone will know your dirty little secret.
I presume you haven't told Nicholas.
No, he mustn't find out.
Ever.
He would leave me.
I have a life, a future.
It would destroy everything! Don't be afraid of Lawrence Ashton.
He's being taken care of.
# All things bright and beautiful # All creatures great and small # All things wise and wonderful The Lord God made them all.
We are so close to our prize.
There are no excuses for second place.
INSPECTOR CLEARS THROA A word.
Sorry, but I'm in the middle of In privateif you'd be so kind.
She's lying.
Tell me about your brother.
When Mum and Dad died, it was just him and me in the house.
It hit him hard, their deaths.
He started drinking.
Over time, he got worse and worse.
He was always shouting at me, wanting me to do everything for him.
And then he started using his fists.
You must have been terrified.
One morning, I burnt his breakfast.
And he stormed into the kitchen, threw the plate at me.
Then he picked up a knife.
And I I still had the frying pan in my hand, and He died.
The police thought I did it for his share of the inheritance.
Not that there was much to inherit.
I pleaded guilty to manslaughter .
.
and did ten years.
And you never told Nicholas? I was 19 when I went in.
I'd never even been on a date with a boy.
I got out, moved to Kembleford, somewhere no-one knew me.
Where you met Nicholas.
He was so kind, sogentle.
I couldn't bear him knowing what I had done.
And, as the months went on, it got harder to find the words.
All I wanted was a new start, my own life, and now it's just being ripped into pieces.
The police will deal with Lawrence Ashton.
As for Nicholas .
.
you are engaged to be married.
How can you give yourself to him before God unless you are willing to open your heart? If you love him, tell him the truth.
If he loves you, he will understand.
But, first, you have some singing to do.
I can't do this! What do you mean? I don't know what I'm doing.
I haven't rehearsed.
I'm going to make an utter fool of myself! It's like that nightmare you have when you're back at school.
Now, you listen to me.
You have been singing these hymns since you were a little girl.
All you have to do is follow the music and listen to the others.
You can do this, Aunt Fliss.
Right.
You're on.
Audrey's not back yet.
Perhaps you could stand in for her.
Me? Oh, no, I can't You could mime.
I think you've kept us all waiting long enough! What's it to be? Oh, here she is.
Sorry! Right.
Everyone ready? # Ave Maria # Gratia plena # Maria # Gratia plena # Maria, gratia plena # Ave, ave dominus # Dominus tecum # Benedicta tu # In mulieribus # Et benedictus # Et benedictus # Fructus ventris # Ventris tuae, Jesus # Ave Maria I still can't believe I won! Be-believeyou won.
Yes, we ALL won.
The look on Canon Fox's face when he handed you that trophy was an absolute treat.
Hello, Father.
Sergeant Goodfellow, I thought you were on your way home.
GOODFELLOW LAUGHS Not quite yet, Father.
I just wanted to let you know that Lawrence Ashton confessed to threatening Audrey.
He's offered to pay for the damages to the coach, so Well, looks like he'll get off with a slap on the wrist.
Hardly punishment enough after what he did.
If it's any consolation, he will almost certainly lose his job at the prison.
Thank you again, Sergeant, for saving me from that dead woman's boots.
If there's ever anything I can do to repay you Now that you mention it, there is one thing.
Hate to ask.
I know it's been a long day, but .
.
I could do with a favour.
What on Earth are we doing here, Goodfellow? I need to get home before the wife finishes sharpening the carving knife! Well, I know how disappointed you were, sir, that you missed her performance.
And I told them how hard you tried to get there on time.
ORGAN BEGINS "ABIDE WITH ME" # Abide with me # Fast falls the eventide # The darkness deepens # Lord, with me abide # When other helpers fail # And comforts flee # Help of the helpless # Oh, abide with me # Swift to its close # Ebbs out life's little day # Earth's joys grow dim # Its glories pass away # Change and decay # In all around I see # O Thou who changest not Abide with me.