Monk s08e07 Episode Script

Step into it, now.
Come on, Petey.
Don't be afraid of the ball.
Step into one, now.
Come on, kid.
Here we go, Petey.
Nice level swing, now.
Eye on the ball Petey.
Comme on, you can do it.
Here we go, level swing.
All right.
Hey, that's all right.
Hey, Petey, it's all right.
See that ball.
Wait for a good pitch.
Come on, Petey.
Looking good, Martha.
You want to play? We need a center fielder.
- You trying to kill me, Chauncey? - Don't talk like that.
You're gonna outlive us all.
Hey, here we go, petey.
Come on, now! Step into one, now.
Meet the ball.
Here we go.
You can do it.
This is your pitch, Petey.
Comme on now, this one is yours.
Meet the ball.
Here we go, Petey.
All that practice about to pay off.
Come on, Petey.
That a boy, Petey! That's how you do it! That's how you do it, right there, kid.
Somebody get that.
Those things cost four bucks each.
Nice hit, Petey! Attaboy! Look at all this stuff.
I guess we have to pack it all up.
Let's worry about it after the funeral.
I still can't believe this.
She beat cancer twice to die like that? Hit by a baseball.
At least she didn't suffer.
Her fish.
They must be starving.
There you go.
I know.
I Miss her too.
What's that? Bills Mostly.
I'll give them to the lawyer.
Beth Beth, look at this.
What is it? Is that a baseball? It's postmarked tuesday.
That was three days before she died.
-= 807 =- - Don't touch it.
- I'm not touching it.
I don't even want to look at it.
Thank you for coming.
We caught a weird one here.
- I mean, this is off the charts.
- What happened? What did you do here? We rearranged the squad room.
I guess I should start at the beginning.
On friday, a woman named Martha Murphy was killed.
She was hit by a baseball.
She was power walking past the little league field when a 12-year-old kid named petey cunningham knocked one over the fence and beaned her, left temple.
I mean, what are the odds, right? A million to one? - A billion to one, maybe.
- You rearranged the squad room.
Why? It's supposed to be more efficient.
We've, broken it down into five different units.
- It's actually working out pretty well.
- Whatever.
Listen, get this Yesterday, Martha's family flies in from Denver.
They go to her house.
They're gonna get grandma's affairs in order.
Guess what they found? It's the darndest thing.
- In 30 years of law enforcement - Here's what I don't nderstand.
What was the problem with the way it was? The way it was before was the way It's always been.
I haven't even gotten to the voodoo stuff yet.
- Voodoo? - I mean, it's so random, isn't it? You got all these arbitrary formations and I mean, who can work like this? It's madness.
Okay! I don't know what I was thinking.
Randy, let's put it back the way it was.
What, you mean right now? For how long? Until Monk dies.
You heard the captain.
Let's move the desks back the way they were.
Let's go, sergeant.
Give me a hand with this one here.
Captain, yeah.
Let me just grab that there.
Hey, guys, let's go, let's go, let's go.
We don't have all day.
That's right.
Yeah, thank you.
Don't touch that.
Yeah, captain.
Yeah, if you can get that one back there.
There we go.
There we go.
All right.
Chair.
Yeah, that one's a little off.
It's a-askew.
You know, kind of Okay, now, that's too far.
You went too That's the way it was.
Yeah, almost.
So what did you find at her house? Over here.
Voodoo doll.
We've already traced it from a store in the haight Reverend Jorgensen's voodoo boutique.
Just sent fenderman and kramer up there to take a look.
It was postmarked last tuesday in nob hill.
Checked with post office.
The postmark is 100% legit.
So here's what we have.
The doll was mailed three days before she died.
And I'm looking at it, but it's just not possible.
Wait a minute.
What? I'm sorry.
Something about voodoo? - She was exercising? - Yes, sir.
Power Walker, came by every afternoon.
At the same time? - Varied 3:30, 4:00.
- So she was walking along here.
The ball came over the fence.
Are there a lot of balls hit over this wall? Not really.
Every now and then, maybe.
It was a hell of a hit, actually.
I mean, too bad about Mrs.
Murphy, but Petey really got all of it, 'cause you kept your eye on the ball.
You listened to me, waited for your pitch.
It was a beautiful hit.
I mean, until the, you know.
Right.
Hi, Petey.
Did you know, Mrs.
Murphy? No, sir.
Am I going to jail? - Probably not.
So what do you think? Act of god, right? Yeah, so how do you explain the doll? I can't explain it yet.
You want me to start rounding up witch doctors? That'd probably make a hell of a lineup, though.
You know, it's not funny.
I used to laugh about it too.
About what? Voodoo, black magic.
Wait, you can't actually believe in that stuff.
Somebody predicted that poor woman would get hit by a baseball three days before it happened.
How would you explain it? Well I mean - Maybe - Well, wait, I got it.
Well she walked by here every day, right? So maybe the killer was waiting back here behind this tree with a baseball gun.
A baseball gun? There's no such thing.
Yeah, but there are pitching machines.
So how would your baseball-gun killer - that's a good name for him by the way.
- How would he know someone would hit a home run at exactly that moment? And what happened to the other baseball? Yeah, the baseball.
It's voodoo.
It's real, and it kills people.
How about this? She had an insurance policy with a no-suicide clause.
So she had to make it look like an accident.
She came here, she waited for a home run to be hit.
She grabs the ball and cracks her own cranium.
With a baseball? She fractured her cranium? Was she that strong? - She exercised.
- She exercised.
I think voodoo's looking better and better.
Okay, let's be rational here.
We live in the real world.
It is governed by science, physics, laws of nature.
There is always, always a non-voodoo explanation for everything.
Except voodoo.
I don't understand.
Did some Gypsy put a curse on you when you were a child? - I don't want to talk about it.
- We'll be right there.
Randy, what is it? Hat? It's another doll.
Hi, lieutenant.
- Is this a crime scene? - I don't know.
I think so.
- I don't know what the hell it is.
- Ed, just tell himwhat you told me.
Okay, remember this a couple days ago? There was thunder and lightning.
The guy kept golfing.
Remember you said what a Jerk the guy was, how he single-handedly proved Darwin's theory? - What about it? - The guy's nam is Ralph Farris, okay? This is his place.
He doesn't have any family, right? So this morning, the super comes in to start packing up and And what? And this.
Postmarked a week ago, nob hill.
Go ahead and open it.
- No, you can open it, sir.
- I'll open it.
Although, technically, I am just a consultant.
Sergeant, - you're not helping.
- Yes, sir.
I'll open it.
It's another doll, isn't it? And there's a lightning bolt coming out of its head? No, it's his neck.
No, you're right.
It's his head.
Now do you believe me? What What time is it? It's not 8:00, is it? I have a surprise, a good surprise.
It's a good thing.
We're going away.
We're going on vacation.
No, thank you.
You've been working too hard.
You need a break.
I already made a reservation.
It's a five-star resort in Santa Barbara.
Five stars means immaculate.
Here's the brochure.
We don't have to fly.
It's right down the coast.
And get this Your room is on the tenth floor.
Room 1010, how about that? Wait, wait.
We talked about this.
I don't really do vacations.
Did I mention it's my treat? It won't cost you a nickel.
Room 1010? What about Julie? Julie's still on the internship in Washington.
So It's just you and me, boss! - You ready? Here we go! - Wait a second.
Now, you mean? - Right now? - Yeah, that's the fun of it.
We just get up and go.
We're fancy-free! - We're fancy-free? - Yeah.
Is that what you just said? How can I leave? I'm still working on the voodoo thing.
They won't even Miss you.
They'll be fine.
- I have to call the captain and - No, no.
I'll call the captain.
I'll do that.
You just get your coat.
Captain Stottlemeyer, please.
Hi, it's Natalie.
I'm taking Mr.
Monk out of town for a couple of days.
Yeah, I agree.
He needs a break.
So don't even bother calling.
Get the coat.
I will, I will, as soon as we get back.
Okay.
All right, bye.
- He wants us to take a lot of pictures.
- That phone's unplugged.
- Pardon me? - It's not plugged in.
There's the cord.
Are you calling me a liar? - It's not plugged in.
- So you're calling me a liar? I don't know what to say.
It's not plugged in.
Natalie, what is going on? Are you in trouble? It's this case, Mr.
Monk.
I hate this case.
- What, th th Two voodoo dolls.
Three.
The captain called an hour ago.
Excuse me? - Are you in charge? - Yes, ma'am.
We both are.
Mostly him.
It wasn't his heart.
It was that doll.
That voodoo doll killed him.
Yes.
Miss Dilworth, Angeline Dilworth.
- He was my uncle.
- Ms.
Dilworth, I need you to take a deep breath? Can you do that for me? - Are you okay? - I'm gonna wait out here.
Natalie, you're being ridiculous.
I can't go in.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, I hate to mention this, but it is technically your job.
- Then fire me.
- I'm not going to fire you.
Just don't go anywhere.
You're my ride home.
I hate this case.
You've made that clear.
You hate the case I was upstairs.
I heard him scream.
I came back down.
I guess he had opened the mail, He just collapsed.
I'm an E.
R Nurse.
I tried everything.
I did cardiocerebral resuscitation.
And I just It was too late, and He was just gone.
We found these on the kitchen counter Nitroglycerine.
Yeah, he had a bad heart.
He'd been sick for a long time.
That's why I moved back To help.
I was the only family he had.
Captain, we're all done here.
Can I take him? I want Monk to have a look at him.
Where the hell is he? I don't know.
Hey, there you are.
Where the hell you been? - I called two hours ago.
- It's Natalie.
She didn't even give me the message.
She's all twisted up about this case.
She's outside right now.
She won't come in.
Now, wait a minute.
Let me get my head around this.
You are the level-headed, brave one now? She's shaking her head.
It's this voodoo stuff.
She she believes it.
- Yeah, I don't think she's coming in.
- I can't really blame her.
We've all got the heebie-jeebies.
Say hello to doll number three.
- Heart attack.
- Yep.
Victim number three, Robert Boyd, 64 years old.
Guy was a big fish.
He owned boyd teletronics.
The cell phone company? So, according his niece, Angeline dilworth That's her right over there.
He's had a bad ticker for years.
She's been worried about him, especially this last week.
Why is that? Apparently, he was obsessed with the voodoo killings.
He was watching the news, following the case.
- He's real superstious.
- Yeah, so I see.
So he goes to collect the mail, including this box.
Yeah, same as the others Postmarked three days ago, no return address.
He opens the box, sees the doll.
Bob's your uncle, his heart just stops.
"Bob's your uncle"? That doesn't sound right.
Well, Bob was her uncle Uncle robert.
- Right, but that doesn't matter.
- Excuse me.
- It's a figure of speech.
- A figure of whose speech? - I've never heard - His name is Robert No, I know.
No, no, back up a second.
I've never heard "bob's your uncle" before.
Have you been to Australia? - No, I've never been to Australia.
Bob's your uncle, mate.
Didgeridoo.
Have you been Have you been to Australia? Did you, like, see a movie, like? Like, "that's a knife, mate.
" Is there a problem? It's upside down.
What is? The horseshoe.
It's supposed to point up, so the good luck stays in the shoe.
He was a superstitious guy.
I'm surprised he didn't know that.
Maybe that's why it didn't work.
We haven't met.
I'm Adrian Monk.
I've heard of you.
You're that famous detective.
I'm Angeline Dilworth.
I understand you were here alone when it happened.
- That's right.
- Did your uncle know the other victims? Martha Murphy or Ralph Farris? Natalie just called from the driveway.
She wants to go home.
Now? Yep, she's in pretty bad shape, I can tell.
- You'd better take care of her.
- What can I do? You've seen normal people, sensitive people, taking care of each other.
Do what they do.
Call you later.
I'm sorry about your uncle.
Look at this place.
It's like halloween the year round.
Lucky Bath crystals.
Incense powder.
Money powder.
It's guaranteed to cure all financial woes.
- Well, you should buy it.
- Can't afford it.
Cupid's arrow.
It's a love potion.
- What? - It's not working.
Good.
Are these the same voodoo dolls from the news? Be very careful with that.
That's a very powerful instrument.
- Don't give him your real name.
- Why not? Just to be safe.
- The dolls.
- Right.
Reverend Jorgensen.
- My name is Leland Stottlemeyer.
- So is mine.
We'd like to ask you a couple of questions about your merchandise.
We're gonna be a while here.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I've been talking to you guys all week, and I'm all talked out.
Well, that's unfortunate, because there was another incident, - Did you sell this doll? Probably.
Looks like mine.
You're three for three, because all three dolls came from your shop.
Give me a break.
I can't be responsible for how my dolls are used.
Did did you take out this advertisement? What if I did? It's no big deal.
Could be a motive.
- A motive? - Publicity.
Seem to be pretty busy here.
You think I killed all those people for publicity? How? How did I do that? We don't know.
We don't know yet.
Are we done here? Yeah, we're done.
If, you think of anything else, please, don't hesitate to call me or call lieutenant Natalie, it's me.
Feeling better? Great, listen I have a favor to ask.
I don't know what's going on with you and all this voodoo stuff, but here's the thing.
You cannot be the unstable one.
I cannot take care of you.
This morning I spent six hours organizing my cereal boxes.
I've to be honest.
I cannot function like this.
Do you understand? What? I got it.
They'll be here in five minutes.
Was there anything else in the box? When did it arrive? The postmark says pacific heights.
Do you know anybody in pacific heights? They miss Pelled your name.
T- e-a-g-e-r.
Who spells your name like that? The devil.
Excuse me? The head's been cut off.
That's what it means.
I'm I'm gonna be decapitated.
It doesn't mean anything.
I mean, it could've broken off in shipping, right? You're right.
It has been cut with some kind of scalpel.
What's gonna happen to Julie? Look at me.
Look at me.
All right, this is me talking.
Nothing is going to happen.
I don't know what's going on here, but it isn't hoodoo, and it isn't voodoo.
Someone Is just trying to scare you.
Voodoo isn't real.
It's a fairy tale.
You've been asking me all week How can I believe in this stuff? When Mitch first started his tour, I lived in South Carolina.
We had a little apartment off base.
There was this woman who lived down the hall, Ms.
Ayida.
She claimed to be a voodoo priestess.
She said that Mitch was in danger.
She told me to warn him.
I didn't say anything.
I didn't warn him.
I guess I didn't take it seriously.
The next day he was shot down.
And you blame yourself? It's not a fairy tale, Mr.
Monk.
We get your call.
Hey, good morning.
How'd you sleep? I didn't.
Do you know anything about ceiling fans? - Like what? - Do they ever come off? There's one in my bedroom.
I swear it was whispering my name all night.
Try the couch.
It doesn't matter.
I'm never sleeping again.
- Where's Mr.
Monk? .
We've got 40 guys on the case, Nat.
- What are you looking for? - A knife.
I threw them out.
The blender, too, and the hedge clippers.
Got it.
Listen, everything's gonna be fine.
We're gonna put you in a safe house this afternoon.
Randy, I'm not leaving.
- I'm never leaving this house again.
- You're gonna have armed guards.
It's already been scheduled, Natalie.
The cookie.
Sorry.
Doesn't matter.
I could have the whole sixth fleet guarding me.
It's just a doll.
You really don't believe in it? Witchcraft, voodoo? I'm a Pisces.
We're not superstitious.
Where's your milk? No toque la muneca, you understand me? Do not touch the Don't touch anything, okay? We'll have an officer there in 20 minutes.
I told the mayor not to go public.
Now we got 50 copycats out there.
Half the town is getting voodoo dolls in the mail, and all of them want a squad car in their driveway.
But these are the four, the only four that count.
The same wrapping paper, the same handwriting, it's strange.
He doesn't write the address on the box.
He uses these labels.
What does that tell us? I don't know.
I don't know.
It's the damndest thing, right? What about the victims? Any connection? The FBI's been running their names all day.
There's no connection.
Here's some more bad news.
Our number-one suspect, our only suspect, is not gonna fly.
- The guy who was selling the dolls.
- Reverend Jorgensen.
He's got an alibi for all three victims.
And now Natalie.
Now Natalie.
How's she doing? She's scared to death.
I just talked to Randy.
She hasn't gotten off the couch all day.
Now he says she's wearing one of those plastic dog funnels around her neck.
That can't be good.
We have got to do something.
She's going to completely unravel.
It would take me forever to replace her.
But of course, that's not the most important thing.
This isn't about me.
You know, if she really does take this crap seriously, there is something we can do.
Don't answer it.
Don't answer it! It's okay.
I know who it is.
Thank you for it coming.
Right here, right this way.
This is Hadley Jorgensen.
Reverend Jorgensen.
Captain Stottlemeyer told me you had a problem.
He thought I could help.
How? How? Sister, you have been cursed.
And without getting too technical, I'm here to un-curse you.
Mr.
Monkis going to help.
I am? I've taken the liberty of making a replica of the dolls, working from photos.
Does this look about right? How do you know this will work? Sister, I guarantee it.
You shall be cleansed.
Can't you just fast forward and get to the end? What what is that? It's an herb.
It's called asafetida.
Also known as devil's dung.
We're done here.
Thank you very much for coming, though.
Please let him finish.
Yes, it's almost ready.
What is it? It's my own original recipe.
If you would be so kind as to reattach its head.
Here's some adhesive.
Some witchgrass, some coltsfoot.
Mandrake root.
Smidgen more.
All I need now is the doll.
One second.
It doesn't have to be perfect.
Almost done.
It's symbolic, really.
There we go.
The forces of darkness are gathering.
Hold on.
It doesn't have to be perfect! Wait a second.
It doesn't have to be perfect.
- Almost done.
- Doesn't Wait one sec - please, just let him finish! - Hold on.
She's suffering, Mr.
Monk! It doesn't have to be that's close enough.
The potion is ready.
Potion's ready.
Cleanse this body.
Release its soul.
Expel its darkness.
Make her whole.
What did you do? - What? - Did you drink that? You said You're supposed to rub it on your neck! - What, are you mental? - What do we do? - What do we do? - What? 911.
911! Another chant? Call 911.
How do you feel? - God, it hurts.
- I know, I know.
Just hang on.
Hang on, they should be here any They're here.
Here they're.
Maybe we should induce vomiting.
Let's call that plan never-do.
We got a call.
Somebody o.
D.
'd? - What did she take? - An anti-hex potion, about 15 ingredients.
She wasn't drink it.
Angeline, right? Mr.
Monk, small world.
I didn't know you were a paramedic.
- I didn't mention that? - No you didn't.
- What was in it specifically? - Nothing that unusual.
Some alkanet root, some deer tongue, root bark, motherwart, graveyard dirt.
What wasn't in it? Write everything down.
I'll go with you.
Sorry, there's There's no room.
You can ride with me, if you don't mind the mess.
You allergic to any medication? You were there.
You were a witness.
I said the potion was ready.
I never said to drink it.
That's not voodoo.
That's voo-don't.
What is all this stuff? It's gonna get us killed! They're my good-luck charms! It's a small world.
Excuse me? The paramedic, I met her before.
She was Robert Boyd's niece.
Wait, wait And before that! Victim number two! She was the paramedic on the golf course.
There's got to be a good explanation.
I know Angeline, and she's a good person.
You know her? I mean, I've seen her around.
She's a customer.
She's a customer? Has she ever bought any of those dolls? Sure five, maybe six.
That's it.
That's it.
She's the guy.
- Who's the guy? - The paramedic! Angeline, she's the connection.
Her uncle was loaded.
He was the real target.
The other dolls were just distractions.
It was so simple.
It was brilliant! All she need were some packages that had been postmarked.
So she mailed a few empty boxes to herself, then she waited.
She need the right accident, the right victim.
Martha Murphy was perfect.
She lived alone.
Angeline borrowed her key, snuck into her house, and left the box and customized doll in plain sight.
Two days later, she did the same thing with Mr.
Farris.
The third victim was the real target.
Killing her uncle was easy.
Angeline's a paramedic.
She knew exactly what drugs to use, something untraceable, something that would look like a heart attack.
She put some good-luck charms around the room to make him look superstitious, and the stage was set.
Thanks a lot, detective.
I'll probably never sell another voodoo doll.
You're in a lot of pain.
Let me get you something.
Do you have a cell phone? No, I never use them.
I prefer to communicate over the astral plane.
Fine.
Go! Come on.
You have to run it.
Do it.
Just do it now! - Call an ambulance! - A different, this one's cursed.
Right away.
I don't understand.
Why me? She was afraid I was getting too close.
She was trying to keep me distracted.
'cause she knew how much you cared about me.
She knew you'd be so worried about me, - you couldn't think straight.
- That was her theory.
But don't forget, she was clinically insane.
I'm so relieved.
I've never been happier to be wrong.
- About what? - About everything.
About voodoo, about Mitch and me.
Good! I'm glad.
Welcome back to the real world, the world of facts and science, and rational thought.
You missed one.
- You were saying? - Facts and science Natalie, if you let superstion rule your life, you're just avoiding any responsibility.
- You missed another one.
- No.
You missed it.
I watched you you missed it.
- Where was i? - Rational thought.
Exactly.
Superstitions, hexes, curses, voodoo They're all just crutches that people use when they can't cope with the