Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990) s08e16 Episode Script

You know, this gets better every time I read it.
Then it must be brilliant by now.
You know, this is the first review I ever wrote.
Swoon over it any more, it'll be your last.
Okay, listen to this.
"Playing at Prufrock's, Jamie Blake's acquired "a local rep for being edgy, but to me she was ragged.
"I saw no spark; Simply another in an already long line "of angst-ridden female vocalists.
Now" I'm looking for David Silver.
- And you would be? - Jamie.
"Unfortunately, her band followed her lead.
"So on my four-star rating system, four being best, Jamie's performance rates a big black hole.
" So you're the jerk that wrote this trash.
- Jamie.
- "Jamie"? The Jamie? Well, it's nice to meet you.
I've heard so much about you.
Gotta go.
I'm late for dialysis.
Good luck with that.
Thanks for ruining my career.
Look, I just wrote what I thought.
Who cares what you think? You don't know anything about music.
That's not true.
Look, those who can, do.
Those who can't, write reviews.
Well, I'm entitled to my opinion.
Your opinion got me fired.
- Fired? - After your hatchet job came out, the club owner dropped me.
- Hey, I'm sorry.
- I worked hard to get where I am; A few careless words and you tear it all down.
Well, I didn't mean for that to happen.
Then you're even more thoughtless than I imagined.
What's this? Proof that you cared.
You don't tape record people's conversations.
Well, I'll remember that the next time I'm treated like dirt.
Is there a point to this? Do you want to come in? No, here is fine.
- Five minutes.
- I said "no.
" Well, I just wanted you to hear what a convincing liar you are.
Is that it? Well, for most people, that would be enough.
Is this the only copy? Maybe.
Maybe not.
Are you going to send one to Kelly? Maybe.
Maybe not.
Look Emma, I'm sorry that I hurt you, but I don't see how hurting Kelly is gonna make that any better.
You hurt me.
I hurt Kelly.
Kelly hurts you.
Got to admit, it's got a certain symmetry.
Is this the only copy? Go to hell.
We need her.
Steve, you promised not to interfere in my decisions.
And my decision is she's gone.
Man, we have never had so much mail.
Emma's struck a nerve.
People want to talk about - their relationships.
- She's not the person they should be talking to, believe me.
Why not? She's the advice columnist.
It's about relationships.
I'm not having this fight with you right now.
- I'm getting her back.
- No, Steve, don't.
Give me one good reason.
I'm the editor.
And I'm the publisher.
- Okay, um - Yeah? I had an affair with her.
Want to talk about it? Not much to say.
I'm a cad.
Yeah, you're a cad.
Does Kelly know about this? Not yet.
What? What? No, no, no.
No, no.
You are not confessing.
I figured honesty would be the best policy in a situation like this.
As a first resort? Never.
And what would you suggest? "Dear Kelly, "My boyfriend cheated on me.
"Do I forgive him or stick needles "in his eyeballs.
" Signed "Torn in Two.
" What the hell is that? Well, think about it, Brandon.
Kelly loves that armchair psychology stuff, right? Well, we make her the advice columnist.
Send her this letter.
Then we get a free read on how she'll react.
And if she reacts badly? Well, your secret's safe with me.
But you think she's awful.
But the CD is great.
David, you're not asking me to listen to her CD.
You're asking me to let her perform.
I don't know.
I think maybe I went too far.
I mean, this stupid review thing got her fired.
Power of the pen.
Well, I feel responsible.
You write an obituary, people are going to think she's dead.
Hello? Yeah.
Over-under on the punch count? $250, cash only.
Yeah, got it.
See you at the club.
"Punch"? Uh, we're thinking about of doing a tropical night at the club.
So, um, you were saying? No, you were.
That you're not going to help me out.
David, I run a business, not a charity.
Val, I'm asking for a favor here.
Look, just listen to the CD, all right? If you like what you hear then let her open up tomorrow night.
Maybe live isn't her thing.
Maybe she was just having a bad day.
So you're not even gonna listen to it? No.
If you've listened to it, I don't have to.
You're not going to regret this.
Maybe that's because I already do.
You actually like boxing? The sweet science? What's not to like? Let's see: Brutality, savagery, I don't know, brain damage.
It's primal.
Try primitive.
It's two people alone, circling.
Feeling each other out, you know.
Waiting for the right moment.
Plus, there's clinching.
Mmm Well, as long as you put it that way.
Want to go a few rounds later? I'm counting on it.
Thanks.
You're a quick study.
Oh, well, come upstairs and I'll show you how quick.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Any knockouts in there, or are they just pummeling each other silly? When you stop and think about it, boxing's not so bad.
Abs.
Pecs.
Satin shorts with "Killer" sewn into them it's a look.
Think I, uh, could use it for Child's Play? That's your department.
Ah, you mean Zach's.
He's the one with his finger on the pulse of little America.
We talking a big commission here? 'Cause I'm his manager.
We're talking field trip.
You off tomorrow? Yeah and Zach doesn't have school, so I say we stop till we drop.
Great, speaking of which, where is the little genius? Steve took him to dinner and a movie.
Really? Never thought I'd see the day where Steve's idea of dinner and a movie was a corn dog and Lassie Come Home.
He's been terrific.
Other than my mom, he's really the only person I feel totally comfortable leaving Zach with.
Well, that must be a good feeling.
Yeah, it is.
Okay, so, we're on for tomorrow? Okay, I'll pick you guys up.
We live with you, remember? Mm-hmm, but I'm spending the night on the boat.
Oh, nice.
I think so.
- Okay.
- What's the total? $4,800 and counting.
It's spread pretty even, too, so you won't have to lay much off.
Like you said, I'm a quick study.
Okay, I'll have your take by noon tomorrow.
Okay.
Hey, uh, you kind of surprised me there.
You didn't surprise me a bit.
You want to explain that? Not particularly.
- No, try anyway.
- Uh Noah, it's nothing really.
Just some friendly wagering with customers.
Look, we run a nightclub here, not a casino, okay? You told me the owner was cool.
Rule number one.
Everybody's on board.
Hey, I'm sorry.
I run a business, too.
Do me a favor.
Run it somewhere else.
Okay.
No-no-no-no-no-no.
The money stays here.
I don't think so.
You want to bet? Don't think you're not on the hook for this.
Do you know how much money - you just cost me? - Bookmaking is illegal.
Newsflash: Betting on sports is practically the national pastime.
I want you to give the money back.
What? But -You're giving the money back.
No, no, no End of conversation, okay? Yeah? Is the betting window open? Of course.
Always.
Okay, let's go over this again.
I know what to say, Steve.
One screw up.
One false step.
One mention of that double cheeseburger, the chili cheese fries or that chocolate shake and - Uh, cherry soda.
- Yeah, thanks.
One mention of any of that stuff and I'm a dead man.
Now, let's go over what I told you to say.
Okay, chicken, mashed potatoes, broccoli Are you telling me to lie to Mom? No, no, not unless she asks.
- Okay? - 0kay_.
- Hey.
- Hi, how are you? Zach! Steve! You've got to keep hold of him.
I was.
-No, you've got to hold his hand, especially around traffic.
What, he's not a moron.
He's not gonna jump out in front of a Mack truck.
He's six years old.
He doesn't always watch what's going on around him; That's your job.
Don't you think you're overreacting a little bit? No, I don't.
I thought I could trust you with him.
You can trust me.
Come on, we had a good time tonight.
I did my job.
I really love this "Ask Kelly" idea.
Only it should be "Ask Emma.
" It was her decision to move on.
Plus, it's a good opportunity for you to play armchair shrink.
Mm-hmm.
Well, I am in a great relationship with a great guy.
I must have something to offer the lovelorn.
My thinking exactly.
Ooh, this is a good one.
"Dear Emma," Kelly.
"My live-in boyfriend "recently told me he had an affair.
"He was apologetic "and claimed it only happened once, "and it didn't mean anything.
"He swears he's broken it off with the other woman.
"He can't forgive himself, but he's asking me to.
"We've survived turbulent times before "and I believe we love each other very much, "but I feel so betrayed.
"What should I do? Torn in Two.
" That's a tough one.
How would you answer? Oh, no-no-no-no, no, no, not me.
I just want the male's opinion.
You know, so I can have a balanced answer.
Okay, um Well, the guy did wrong, no question about that.
But maybe he's learned his lesson.
Does she want to throw away what seems like a perfectly good relationship based on one little slipup? That's a valid point.
I mean, he did come clean about it.
And if he tells her the truth about that, I mean, he'd tell her the truth about anything.
- Hmm.
- It could actually build trust in the relationship.
Really, you think? Wow Thanks.
What about you? I don't know.
You don't have a gut feeling? Yeah, yeah.
Well, what is it? Something I want to sleep on.
Good night.
I told you I would give you my column later today.
Jeez, is he always this pushy? Man cracks a surprisingly mean whip.
I just thought this being your first article that if you had it in early, maybe we could - clean it up a bit.
- Are you saying I can't write? No, I think he just wants to know what it is you're going to write about.
Infidelity.
Pro or con? Kel, the best way to get Herr Publisher off your back is to tell him that you're thinking your column through.
- Isn't that right? - Absolutely.
I just want to make sure you're being careful - and objective.
- Why wouldn't I be objective? We're just saying what you write matters.
Yeah, some readers may actually base important life decisions on your advice.
You think? I know it.
That sounded great.
We're all set.
What about the manager? She didn't even hear it.
Don't worry about it.
I used to run this place, and we're kind of seeing each other.
Ls that a good thing? It could be, for both of us.
Cool.
Thank her for me.
Look, um I'm just really trying to make up for a stupid mistake.
You guys are really good.
Don't let jerks like me tell you otherwise.
Thanks, that's sweet.
Thanks.
Val, hey.
I want you to meet Jamie.
Jamie, this is Valerie Malone, - the manager.
- Hi.
Thanks for letting us play.
Yeah, sure, uh, David says you're very talented.
I hope so, because I talked to the manager at Prufrock's.
- Val.
- Well, he said you had some trouble at the last show.
I already explained that to you.
It was an off night, it happens.
Well, just don't let it happen here, okay? Sorry, she can be kind of, uh intimidating? Yeah, yeah, to be kind about it.
Boyfriend's booking acts now, huh? Don't start, okay? Did you give back the money? I'm working on it.
It's a yes or no question.
You know what, you used to be fun.
What did Donna do to you, huh? Made me laugh, she's been faithful.
You know, the usual.
Maybe not for you.
You know what? You own a bar now.
You should enjoy it.
I'll handle the details, okay? In other words, I should trust you? - Yeah.
- Yeah, right.
It's really cute, don't you think? - Yeah.
- Mom, look! There's the clown! We'll go find him later, sweetie, okay? That's okay, Zach.
We're done.
You were a great model and trendsetter, huh? Soon as you change we go do the fun stuff, all right? He doesn't hate everything, just shopping.
It's a male trait that comes out at a very young age.
Oh, please, look at Noah.
Heir to the Hunter fortune, and he doesn't own a shirt less than four years old.
Were you wearing one of those shirts when you didn't come home last night? - I told you I would be out.
- You did.
Now tell me the good parts.
You know, it's really great being with him like that.
You want to know the best part? Every detail, but hold on.
Are you okay in there, Zach? Yeah.
It was the feeling I got when I left.
Just knowing wherever this goes with him, whatever happens, I'm gonna be able to handle it.
Valerie! Hey.
So how is your protege? Did you have a good session? You know what? You need to stop this right now.
David, I saw her kissing you.
She was thanking me for helping her.
Your help Oh, that wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that she's beautiful, would it? You want to know why I'm into her? Not because of the way she looks, but because of what she does.
When she's thanking you with misty-eyed gratitude.
No, when she playing music, all right? When she's making a living and doing what she loves.
She thinks I'm a wannabe and she's right.
I want to be getting my equipment out of hock, and I want to be up on that stage.
Well, then do it.
It's not that easy.
But you know what, though? I'm really sick of investing in things that aren't going anywhere.
And that's gonna be us if you don't stop this whole jealousy thing.
Think she's writing up there? Oh, man, why don't you go take a walk? Do some sit ups, have a colonic, do something.
I got to tell her, man.
How about a vow of silence? I tried that.
It's killing me.
I can't even look her in the eye.
Brandon, if you tell her, you're gonna hurt her.
I already did.
She just doesn't know it yet.
Hey, guys, want to get something for lunch? Steve, give us a minute, would you? You guys hungry? Yeah, I'm gonna go find something in the kitchen.
- I'll help you.
- Kel, no.
Um, stay here, would you? What? I need to tell you something and you're not going to like it.
You can tell me anything, Brandon.
People People make mistakes.
People do stupid things.
Let Steve get it.
You know that letter you were reading me last night? Yeah, the one that Steve keeps asking me about? Yeah.
That This is driving me crazy, hang on.
Hello? Yeah, it's me.
Emma, I don't think you should be calling here.
Do you mind explaining that? Emma, look I know this is going to hurt, but you've got to listen to me, okay? The affair? It's totally over.
The calling? It's got to stop.
Kel? That was Emma on the phone.
"Torn in Two," that was about Emma.
Kelly, listen No wonder he's been hounding me, waiting for my reply.
What does he think I'm just gonna forgive him? Worse, does he think.
Carly's just gonna forgive him? I think you got this wrong.
Brandon, I just heard him talking about an affair.
Steve slept with Emma.
I'm going to go to the grocery store.
You guys want anything? No, I'm not hungry.
Excuse me.
You told her? Not exactly.
Look, everything's under control.
We can do business as usual.
Could've fooled me.
Are we counting our profits or aren't we? Uh-huh, what about Moses? Noah? I'll handle him.
My thought exactly.
From now on, I send an associate to collect.
Name's Jack.
He'll be by tonight.
How will I recognize him? Don't worry.
He'll recognize you.
$1,200 even.
Now, don't spend it all in one place.
Nah Well, two, at least.
All right, ladies and gentlemen, gather 'round.
Watch closely.
Not once do my fingers leave my hands.
Here we go.
On the count of three.
One.
Two.
Three.
Thank you very much! Whoa.
Look at that.
Look at that right in front of your eyes.
One, two Mama, look the clown.
Yeah, we'll go see him right after this trick.
- Okay- - Okay- Here we go.
Okay, let's try something else, shall we? This is a quick little trick with three kings.
How many kings do you see? Hey, Mr.
Clown.
Abracadabra.
One, two, three.
Thank you very much.
Please don't be afraid to be generous.
Zach? Zach? Donna, where's Zach? - I don't know.
Zach? - He was just next to me.
Zach? What's the matter? My boy.
He was right here.
Maybe he wandered into the nearest store.
Oh, please, God.
Zach! Mommy? How many times do you want to hear it? Round it off to the nearest million.
I'm sorry.
Okay? I couldn't tell Kelly about you without telling her about me.
You were going to tell her anyway.
Until you talked me out of it.
Well, I was wrong.
It happens.
Like clockwork.
Well, if you want to readjust your halo, now's your shot.
Hey.
You know, I was going to stay out of it, but I can't.
We have too much history.
It's not what you think.
Oh, yeah? Then what is it? I thought you and Carly had something.
We do.
You have a funny way of showing it.
Did you know about this? Uh Sort of.
It was, um So, that's why you let Emma go? Because you were uncomfortable having her here? I was uncomfortable.
And you did it even though she was good for the paper.
Well, I'm proud of you for that.
Thanks.
You know I was always hoping that some of Brandon would somehow rub off on you.
Some loyalty, some trust - Something.
- Kel, Kel, please.
Aren't you going to say anything? Yes.
Don't tell Carly, okay? I don't want to hurt her.
Neither do I.
That's the only reason why I'm not going to tell her.
Because part of me thinks she should know what kind of guy she's involved with.
He's six years old, four feet tall, strawberry blond hair.
I'm sorry, but we get so many kids in here, if I saw him, I probably wouldn't even remember.
No sign of him at the car.
No one around here remembers him.
I just reported him missing to security.
But they're gonna need to talk to you for some more information.
Yesterday, I chewed Steve out for not holding his hand.
I mean, what kind of mother am I? You never, ever let go of him.
This is not your fault.
It could've happened to anybody.
Well, then whose fault is it? I mean, I'm the parent.
He's just a little boy.
We're gonna find him, Carly.
We're gonna find him.
Hey, why are you crying? Are you lost? Yeah? Can you, can you tell me your name? I'm not supposed to talk to strangers.
That's right, that's right.
That's usually a good idea.
But how are you going to find your mommy if you don't speak to someone? Come on, I'll help you find her.
Here, do you want to share some of these with me? You're going to have to trust someone.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Well, I suppose I deserve that.
It's the least you deserve.
I'm surprised Brandon told you.
He didn't have to.
Oh, you found out on your own? Oh, do tell.
I'm sure there's a good story in that.
He doesn't love you, Emma.
And I don't love him.
But the sex was great.
How can you pass yourself off as a friend? Trick of the trade.
To get a good story, you have to lower people's guard.
Same with guys.
And breaking up a happy couple, that means nothing to you? People who are happy don't stray.
And the truth is, he was much happier when he was with me.
I heard him tell you it was over.
Not to call, not to come by.
It didn't sound like Steve was very happy to me.
Steve? Steve Sanders? Yes, Steve Sanders.
Who else would it be? But I never slept with Steve.
Emma, I heard the call, okay? I heard him tell you the affair was over.
My affair wasn't with Steve.
It was with Brandon.
You're lying.
I want you to come inside.
There's a tape you need to listen to.
- Hey.
- Hey.
What's up? Nothing.
You writing a song? Yeah, something like that.
Look, David, I'm really sorry about earlier.
I overreacted.
It's all about the music.
I know.
Do you, really? I think so.
But you can be the judge.
I have something I want to show you.
Okay, a couple more.
A few more.
I lied.
Okay, one more.
I just don't want to fall down the steps.
You won't, you won't.
Okay, you have two more.
- Okay.
- All right.
Ready? Yeah, okay.
Got it.
All right.
- Okay.
- Open 'em.
What did you do? Oh, you mean, besides buying you state of the art equipment? No, I mean-I mean, why did you do this? Well, I like investing in things that are going somewhere.
Look, Val, I can't-l can't take this.
I mean, I'll never be able to pay you back.
Oh, I don't know.
I mean, I'm sure we can come up with a payment plan.
Well, I'd need easy terms.
Well, then you've come to the right place.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
His name is Zachary.
He's about four feet tall.
Strawberry blond hair, brown eyes Blue jeans, black sneakers.
No? He had on a red sweatshirt.
Yeah, with a California University logo on it? - Yes, so you saw him? - I think so.
- Light red hair - Yes, wait.
Carly! Come here.
This lady saw Zach.
You did? Where? Right.
He was right up there.
He was holding hands with his father.
They were so cute together.
He doesn't have a father.
Oh.
Are you sure? I mean they certainly looked like they belonged together.
I'm his mother, okay? I know.
Which way did they go? Uh, that way, I think Uh, I'm not sure.
He's been kidnapped.
Uh, okay? What about the time that I plagiarized one of your papers and almost got you thrown out of college? Even.
Ah.
Okay, what about the time that I had that beer bash at your house and 200 of my favorite drunks showed up and made a mess? Even.
What about the time I rented out your house for a porno movie and didn't tell you about it? Even.
We're even for all of it, okay? Are you happy now? Like a man whose criminal record has just been expunged.
- Kelly's reply.
- Hmm.
From Kelly Taylor.
"Dear Torn in Two: "Men say all the same thing when caught cheating.
"'L felt nothing for her.
' 'It only happened once.
' BOTH: 'It'll never happen again.
"' "Believe any of it and you deserve what you get.
" "You can never trust a cheater.
" "And without trust, you have no relationship.
"So dump the guy now before he cheats again, and then you'll really be Torn in Two.
" So much for telling her the truth.
Circle gets the square on that one.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
This lady right here saw Zach.
Oh, I'm glad you're here.
She says a man took him, and she doesn't know where.
I sent a guard to find you.
He could've taken him anywhere by now.
- It's been so long.
- Miss, please.
Why aren't you doing something?! The man she saw take your child, he brought him here.
Zach? Thank God.
Mommy.
I was so worried about you.
Are you okay? I followed the clown.
I know I wasn't supposed to, but It's okay, honey, it's okay.
I was so scared.
Oh, I bet you were.
It's okay now though.
Everything's okay.
Like you said Those who can't, review.
Sounds like you can.
Ah.
Uh, you excited about tonight? Nervous.
You'd think the stage fright would wear off after awhile.
That's what happened to you the other night, huh? Big time.
I'm such an idiot.
I should have picked up on it.
I'm sorry.
David, maybe this was a bad idea.
I mean we could still call it off.
No, no.
Believe me, I know a little bit about stage fright.
You perform? Yeah.
L, uh, almost had a record deal.
Really? What happened? I don't know.
I just stopped trying.
Then someone screamed a little sense into me.
I'm sorry for coming down on you so hard.
Mm.
Don't be; I'm glad you did.
Anyway, um, the stage fright thing What I used to do was I'd focus on my ex-girlfriend and pretend like she was the only one in the crowd.
And that worked? Yeah.
Um, you want to check out the dressing rooms or anything? David, do you mind if I focus on you tonight? No.
No, not at all.
Hey, how is he? He's remarkable.
Before he fell asleep, he was the one reassuring me that this would never happen again.
He's a great boy.
Thank you.
For everything.
Without you today, I'm sure I would have lost it.
I'm just glad I was there with you.
I'm so glad you're here.
What you must have been through today.
- Hey.
- Hi, Donna.
I'm, um, off to the After Dark to meet Noah.
Hopefully, boxing's over.
Bye.
Bye.
Carly, I want to apologize for what happened in the parking lot.
Don't.
Well, no.
It's important.
When things like this happen, it makes you realize how quickly things can turn, and you can't be too protective.
I wasn't holding his hand when he wandered off.
That's a common mistake.
I'm his mother, and I wasn't holding his hand.
And you're a great mother.
And he's very lucky to have you.
When I saw that he was gone But he's not gone.
He's here, and he's always gonna be here.
I'll make you a deal.
I promise I'll always remind you to hold onto him.
And I promise? To always remind me to hold onto you.
The tighter the better.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
You guys want to hear more? Definitely.
All right, well, you're not going to unless you can get the guy responsible for me being up here on stage.
Come on, everyone, let's hear it for David Silver! - Whoo! - Whoo! Did you put her up to this? Well, we talked, and your name came up, and so did your dream.
Oh, I'm gonna kill you.
No, you're gonna owe me for this.
Now go.
So I hear there's a reviewer here from the Times.
Lets give him something to write about.
All right.
I felt.
You slip away.
And now you're running back.
And you won't believe me.
You won't see.
And I.
Keep thinking that.
With all the strength you lack.
It just won't be easy.
Nothing is easy now.
When it's coming down on me.
Coming down on me.
Coming down.
On me.
My head.
Was getting hit.
Behind the smarting, sobbing.
Shame for deceiving.
Lame for Valerie Malone? Sorry, the betting window is closed.
A mutual friend sent me.
Oh, Jack.
Uh, uh, c-can it wait? Afraid not.
Okay, uh, tonight's, tonight's take's behind the bar.
Coming down.
And there's nothing as simple as having it all.
Things that you want keep on changing.
And it's harder than ever to make up the loss.
It's hard to be crazy and free If I didn't know better, I think I should be jealous.
Mm, good thing you know better.
Coming down on.
Coming down on me Okay, $2,300.
All from betting? Suckers bet.
We simply take their money, you know.
Not anymore.
You're under arrest Illegal gambling.
What? - Turn.
- What? What-what's going on? Take your hands off of me! Hey, hey, what's going on here? Who's asking? I'm the owner of the club.
Well, then you're under arrest, too.
Section 32 of the penal code.
Let me guess: Bookmaking.
I can explain.
- Shut up, Val.
- Wait Shut up! You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
Did you know that gambling was going on here? No.
Donna, I'm serious, no.
Oh, man.
Hey, Kel.
What's going on? You did feel something, didn't you? Being in my bed, making love to me.
It was good, wasn't it? Yes, it was.
Emma, you're beautiful, and you're smart.
When she played me that tape, I-I thought it was edited together somehow to make you sound like a monster.
It's only listening to it now that I realized that's exactly what you are.
Kel, I'll do whatever it takes to fix this.
H OW? It was good, wasn't it? It didn't.
You don't care about her? I don't.
I'm the one you love, right? You are.
Only makes it worse, Brandon.
No, you just stay right there, okay? I'm moving back to Donna's.
I don't want you to call me.
I don't want you to come over.
Are we clear? Kel Are we clear?! Yeah, we're clear.