Adventure Time with Finn & Jake s10e12 Episode Script
Gumbaldia
1 [QUACKING.]
[WARBLE, ZAP!.]
[ROARS.]
"Adventure Time" Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the Dog and Finn the Human The fun will never end It's "Adventure Time" Okay, Starchy.
Now! I'm on it! Do I Do I just pull this lever? - [SPROING!.]
- No! I'm on it! [CAMERA CLICKS.]
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING.]
BUBBLEGUM: Excellent.
These photos will help us find out what sort of forces Gumbald has amassed before we mobilize our troops.
What's that, dear? These photos will help us find out I'm glad there's going to be another proper war before I kick the bucket.
Wipe 'em out! - Hey, Princess.
- [GASPS.]
Finn, you donked up my recon! I've got some important stuff to say.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
I don't think going to war with your uncle is a good idea.
I don't have any choice.
By building an army, he's forcing my hand.
It seems to me that all these rhubarbs down through history don't do nobody no good.
Finn, we all love how sweet you are, but sometimes we just have to buckle down and do things the ugly way.
Excuse me.
It's gonna happen, son.
Best thing to do is sharpen your sword and stock up on flower wreaths.
You're dark, Colonel Candy Corn.
How'd it go? No good.
PB is on the road to war.
Jake, it's up to us to fix things with Uncle Gumbald.
Didn't he try to kill you with monsters made out of your own baby teeth? [CLANK!.]
Take that, banana face! Uh, take this, you banana face.
Does everyone have to get caught up in this mentality? I'm going to march right over to Gumbaldia on a last-ditch diplomatic mission.
- Want to come? - DoI? - This is cute, right? - You bet! And that's the number-one priority for kick-butt diplomacy the cuteness offensive! Hey, this is kinda backwards, right? How so? I used to be all about violence.
Now it's, like, I'm different.
You're a beautiful flower, and I love to watch you grow.
[HUMMING.]
MAN: Halt! Gumbald? [CLICKS TONGUE.]
None shall pass.
Fern.
Cuteness offensive.
[CLICKS TONGUE.]
[SIGHS.]
Okay.
I don't wanna fight! I'm just here to see your boss.
Fern, I know we have beef, but let's just talk.
I didn't even know you were alive.
[SCOFFS.]
You thought you had beaten me? Me?! Cool sword.
[GRUNTS.]
Fern, stop! I used to want to be you.
Now I'm a better you! I've proved it.
There's nothing you have that I don't.
Bark! Bark, bark, bark, bark! Bark, bark, baraaaah! Boys! Boys! Stop all this roughhousing! [SIGHS.]
Yes, Aunt Lolly.
"Aunt Lolly" she sounds kind of like mom, yeah? Hey! She was my mom, too! I know, man.
We're like family.
So why are we fighting? [SIGHS.]
Sorry about him.
Now what's a sweet boy like you doing here? I'm trying to stop this ridiculous war.
I mean, this whole thing is crazy, right? Between you and me, honey, I don't want war, either.
Gumbald is becoming so paranoid and erratic.
All he talks about is baking that wretched, wretched cake.
Maybe you can talk some sense into him.
Did you say he's baking a cake? Aah! A breach! But my secret plan is to never die! So, it begins.
[ALARM BLARING.]
Wait! I'm a diplomacy boy today! Gumbald! He's just here to talk.
[BLARING STOPS.]
- Traitor! - I think we can trust him.
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
[GUMBALD WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
[BOTH WHISPERING.]
- Stop.
- I'll hear your case, boy, but I've got a busy day.
We'll have to walk and talk.
Look, PB doesn't want to attack you.
You're gum from the same sidewalk.
Like, just look at this bomb secret laboratory over here.
This is exactly the kind of thing PB would have! Then why is she building up her arms? You see this? This is her forcing my hand.
But that's exactly what she's saying.
You're both so unreasonable.
You want unreasonable? Get a load of my unreasonably bad boy battle automaton! Her name is The Cake.
My niece would never have the ambition for a project like this.
But ambition is my whole deal! You want a closer look, boy? I grant it to you.
This magnificent dessert shall make the whole war relatively swift and painless.
So there's truly nothing I can say to change your mind? Princess Bubblegum has made her bed, and now she must lie in it but not get back up because she'll be dead.
[LAUGHS EVILLY.]
I was wrong about you.
You're nothing like Bonnie.
Wait.
She'll have her cake and eat it, too because she'll be dead.
The Cake makes her dead! - [THUD!.]
- [BOTH SCREAM.]
- What the - [BOTH SCREAM.]
No! No, no, no, no, no! Aah! Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
The pain is astonishing.
You could have let me die and saved your princess a lot of trouble.
Maybe there is a way to co-exist after all.
Hey-o.
That's what I like to hear.
Sorry.
I'm worried if I turn my neck, my head might snap off.
[LAUGHS.]
[BOTH LAUGH.]
[LAUGHTER.]
So Jake is literally inside me, controlling my body, and I'm standing in front of my girlfriend's entire family.
No! This is my first-ever girlfriend.
I really want her to like me.
So then I made him do a diaper baby dance! [LAUGHTER.]
You're as funny as me the funny one! Thanks, Chicle.
But if I could get serious for a second.
No need, Finn.
Your example has said more than words ever could.
Chicle, fetch the celebration bucket.
I declare all hostilities between Gumbaldia and the Candy Kingdom ended.
- Yeah! - Whoo-hoo! Celebration bucket! Be sure to give Bonnie a big hug from me when you tell her.
- You guys are goofballs.
- Blblblblbl! [GASPS.]
Don't look at me! [POOF!.]
Now there's a guy who who really cares about his hair! BOTH: Oh, cousin Chicle! Man, I almost thought that was something really serious.
BUBBLEGUM: I don't believe it.
A signed peace treaty? Finn, you're amazing! I could hug you right no Did you stop at a craft store on the way here? Oh, the glitter juice.
It's part of a weird Gumbaldia treaty-signing ritual.
Once I got to know him, your uncle was actually pretty cool.
As I get older, I see the most important thing is to empathize with my friends and enemies, like, co-exist instead of cutting off people's heads and stuff.
[POOF!.]
[SQUEAKS.]
Peps? [COOING.]
[SNIFFS.]
You've been doused with Gumbald's dumdum solution! [GROWLS.]
Gumbald! Where are you going!? - [SIREN WAILING.]
- Candy citizens, we are going to war! [ALL SCREAMING.]
Hoopty hoo, hoopty hey! Let's cut 'em up, folks! [LAUGHS.]
I donked up.
Don't halt.
Continue running.
I command it.
My thanks to you all for joining me here today.
I hope you're enjoying the hors d'oeuvres.
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
It seems that the Princess avoided our attempt at a peaceful resolution.
But it was still a good plan Aunt Lolly.
This magnificent dessert shall make the whole war relatively swift and painless.
Eh, I love to plan.
Hey.
What's a plan? Oh, cousin Chicle, you've still got it.
Ladies and gentlemen, it's time to unleash plan B, my formidable legion of Candy Kingdom haters Ricardio.
Bandit Princess.
Samantha the warrior dog.
Peacemaster.
Me-mow.
Pete Sassafrass.
Ash the Warlock.
Sir Slicer.
Scorcher.
The Green Knight.
And finally the Iced King.
Uh, I think I might be here by mistake.
What are we doing again? It's Gum War!
[WARBLE, ZAP!.]
[ROARS.]
"Adventure Time" Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the Dog and Finn the Human The fun will never end It's "Adventure Time" Okay, Starchy.
Now! I'm on it! Do I Do I just pull this lever? - [SPROING!.]
- No! I'm on it! [CAMERA CLICKS.]
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING.]
BUBBLEGUM: Excellent.
These photos will help us find out what sort of forces Gumbald has amassed before we mobilize our troops.
What's that, dear? These photos will help us find out I'm glad there's going to be another proper war before I kick the bucket.
Wipe 'em out! - Hey, Princess.
- [GASPS.]
Finn, you donked up my recon! I've got some important stuff to say.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
I don't think going to war with your uncle is a good idea.
I don't have any choice.
By building an army, he's forcing my hand.
It seems to me that all these rhubarbs down through history don't do nobody no good.
Finn, we all love how sweet you are, but sometimes we just have to buckle down and do things the ugly way.
Excuse me.
It's gonna happen, son.
Best thing to do is sharpen your sword and stock up on flower wreaths.
You're dark, Colonel Candy Corn.
How'd it go? No good.
PB is on the road to war.
Jake, it's up to us to fix things with Uncle Gumbald.
Didn't he try to kill you with monsters made out of your own baby teeth? [CLANK!.]
Take that, banana face! Uh, take this, you banana face.
Does everyone have to get caught up in this mentality? I'm going to march right over to Gumbaldia on a last-ditch diplomatic mission.
- Want to come? - DoI? - This is cute, right? - You bet! And that's the number-one priority for kick-butt diplomacy the cuteness offensive! Hey, this is kinda backwards, right? How so? I used to be all about violence.
Now it's, like, I'm different.
You're a beautiful flower, and I love to watch you grow.
[HUMMING.]
MAN: Halt! Gumbald? [CLICKS TONGUE.]
None shall pass.
Fern.
Cuteness offensive.
[CLICKS TONGUE.]
[SIGHS.]
Okay.
I don't wanna fight! I'm just here to see your boss.
Fern, I know we have beef, but let's just talk.
I didn't even know you were alive.
[SCOFFS.]
You thought you had beaten me? Me?! Cool sword.
[GRUNTS.]
Fern, stop! I used to want to be you.
Now I'm a better you! I've proved it.
There's nothing you have that I don't.
Bark! Bark, bark, bark, bark! Bark, bark, baraaaah! Boys! Boys! Stop all this roughhousing! [SIGHS.]
Yes, Aunt Lolly.
"Aunt Lolly" she sounds kind of like mom, yeah? Hey! She was my mom, too! I know, man.
We're like family.
So why are we fighting? [SIGHS.]
Sorry about him.
Now what's a sweet boy like you doing here? I'm trying to stop this ridiculous war.
I mean, this whole thing is crazy, right? Between you and me, honey, I don't want war, either.
Gumbald is becoming so paranoid and erratic.
All he talks about is baking that wretched, wretched cake.
Maybe you can talk some sense into him.
Did you say he's baking a cake? Aah! A breach! But my secret plan is to never die! So, it begins.
[ALARM BLARING.]
Wait! I'm a diplomacy boy today! Gumbald! He's just here to talk.
[BLARING STOPS.]
- Traitor! - I think we can trust him.
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
[GUMBALD WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
[BOTH WHISPERING.]
- Stop.
- I'll hear your case, boy, but I've got a busy day.
We'll have to walk and talk.
Look, PB doesn't want to attack you.
You're gum from the same sidewalk.
Like, just look at this bomb secret laboratory over here.
This is exactly the kind of thing PB would have! Then why is she building up her arms? You see this? This is her forcing my hand.
But that's exactly what she's saying.
You're both so unreasonable.
You want unreasonable? Get a load of my unreasonably bad boy battle automaton! Her name is The Cake.
My niece would never have the ambition for a project like this.
But ambition is my whole deal! You want a closer look, boy? I grant it to you.
This magnificent dessert shall make the whole war relatively swift and painless.
So there's truly nothing I can say to change your mind? Princess Bubblegum has made her bed, and now she must lie in it but not get back up because she'll be dead.
[LAUGHS EVILLY.]
I was wrong about you.
You're nothing like Bonnie.
Wait.
She'll have her cake and eat it, too because she'll be dead.
The Cake makes her dead! - [THUD!.]
- [BOTH SCREAM.]
- What the - [BOTH SCREAM.]
No! No, no, no, no, no! Aah! Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
The pain is astonishing.
You could have let me die and saved your princess a lot of trouble.
Maybe there is a way to co-exist after all.
Hey-o.
That's what I like to hear.
Sorry.
I'm worried if I turn my neck, my head might snap off.
[LAUGHS.]
[BOTH LAUGH.]
[LAUGHTER.]
So Jake is literally inside me, controlling my body, and I'm standing in front of my girlfriend's entire family.
No! This is my first-ever girlfriend.
I really want her to like me.
So then I made him do a diaper baby dance! [LAUGHTER.]
You're as funny as me the funny one! Thanks, Chicle.
But if I could get serious for a second.
No need, Finn.
Your example has said more than words ever could.
Chicle, fetch the celebration bucket.
I declare all hostilities between Gumbaldia and the Candy Kingdom ended.
- Yeah! - Whoo-hoo! Celebration bucket! Be sure to give Bonnie a big hug from me when you tell her.
- You guys are goofballs.
- Blblblblbl! [GASPS.]
Don't look at me! [POOF!.]
Now there's a guy who who really cares about his hair! BOTH: Oh, cousin Chicle! Man, I almost thought that was something really serious.
BUBBLEGUM: I don't believe it.
A signed peace treaty? Finn, you're amazing! I could hug you right no Did you stop at a craft store on the way here? Oh, the glitter juice.
It's part of a weird Gumbaldia treaty-signing ritual.
Once I got to know him, your uncle was actually pretty cool.
As I get older, I see the most important thing is to empathize with my friends and enemies, like, co-exist instead of cutting off people's heads and stuff.
[POOF!.]
[SQUEAKS.]
Peps? [COOING.]
[SNIFFS.]
You've been doused with Gumbald's dumdum solution! [GROWLS.]
Gumbald! Where are you going!? - [SIREN WAILING.]
- Candy citizens, we are going to war! [ALL SCREAMING.]
Hoopty hoo, hoopty hey! Let's cut 'em up, folks! [LAUGHS.]
I donked up.
Don't halt.
Continue running.
I command it.
My thanks to you all for joining me here today.
I hope you're enjoying the hors d'oeuvres.
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
It seems that the Princess avoided our attempt at a peaceful resolution.
But it was still a good plan Aunt Lolly.
This magnificent dessert shall make the whole war relatively swift and painless.
Eh, I love to plan.
Hey.
What's a plan? Oh, cousin Chicle, you've still got it.
Ladies and gentlemen, it's time to unleash plan B, my formidable legion of Candy Kingdom haters Ricardio.
Bandit Princess.
Samantha the warrior dog.
Peacemaster.
Me-mow.
Pete Sassafrass.
Ash the Warlock.
Sir Slicer.
Scorcher.
The Green Knight.
And finally the Iced King.
Uh, I think I might be here by mistake.
What are we doing again? It's Gum War!