Real Time With Bill Maher (2003) s13e22 Episode Script
Caitlin Flanagan, Gavin Newsom, Mary Matalin, Michael Mann & Steve Schmidt
[Applause.]
Bill: Hello, everybody.
How are you? Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Thank you very much.
How you doing? Thank you.
I've missed you too.
Ah, thank you very much.
Thank you.
So great to be back.
Yes, we were off for the month of July and I have been welcomed back by two Republican debates, thank you, Jesus.
So, did you see both Republican how do you describe this experience? Have you ever taken ecstasy? It was the opposite of that.
Ok? I think the two Republican debates my brain was still trying to recover from the Tsunami of stupid from the first one when I was hit by another wave.
For a minute I thought I was watching a Comedy Central Royce of the U.
S.
constitution.
[Applause.]
And oh, yes.
The first one at the baby table, oh, my gosh.
The first one had Rick Prosecutory, Carly fiorina, Bobby jindal.
Wow, you throw in carrot top, it was a great episode of politically incorrect.
And then there was a little break between debates, during which there was one awkward moment when trump asked rubio to bring his car around.
That was that was a gaffe, I will admit.
And then the main event, and as always at Republican debates, they first brought out Reagan's skull so they could all touch it for luck.
And here's what I think is the big story from this detective.
Now, you have to understand this debate was on fox news.
They did the polling to pick the people and I am quite sure Roger ales who runs that and maybe America, he doesn't like trump.
The word came down get trump.
Kill this fucking Rosemary's baby monster in its black crib I swear, that's exactly what he said.
So they let trump speak three times more than anybody else.
He revealed himself to be nasty, boorish, ignorant, smug.
What they forgot is that's what the Republicans love about him.
[Applause.]
That's why his numbers are double of the guy in second place, who's jeb bush.
But Jeb says he doesn't mind getting the second most vote.
He says that's how his brother got elected president.
[Applause.]
But to understand today's Republican party and I know you want to you have to understand that despite the fact that they had on the stage five governors, three senators, a brain surgeon, first and foremost they wanted to get the opinion of Donald trump, a ham colored cartoon character from "I love the 80's.
" I mean, once you accept that, the rest of the night makes perfect sense.
Mr.
trump, your thoughts on war and peace and then we'll go to the kissing bandit on deficit reduction reduction.
And Dr.
Ruth on entitlement spending and Mr.
T.
On the case of rape and increst.
Beat juice, you have 30 seconds for a rebuttal.
But you know who Republicans are actually mad at today? The moderators.
They thought they were too tough.
I have to give them credit, they were tough.
Especially megyn Kelly, went right at them.
She can be good.
Ben Carson, you don't know dick about anything.
Trump, you're a huge sexist asshole.
Marco Rubio, are you old enough to buy beer? Scott Walker, what's wrong with your face? You look like the kid who's carrying a dead bird in his pocket.
[Applause.]
But you know what, after all the fireworks and the name calling and you hugged him and you hugged him it was the dance that was the same as ever.
Muslims are coming to kill us, Mexicans are coming to rape us and if you get imgreg Pregnant nated by impregnated by one, you have to bring it to term.
That's all they have to sell, fear.
Hope and change, meet pee in pants.
I mean, the entire slate of them up there seemed completely unaware of the fact that women can now vote.
You know, [applause.]
Bill: Megyn Kelly asked trump right off the bat about trump calling women fat pigs, dogs, and slobs.
Trump's answer? I don't have time for political correctness.
He's like one of those construction workers in the 1970's.
Nice tits.
Oh, what, can't compliment a lady film? It's crazy.
They all want to get rid of planned parenthood, that's obvious.
They talk about vaginas like they're the northern lights.
I've never seen it but my friend has.
I hear it's breathtaking.
All right, we have a great show.
You're a great crowd.
[Applause.]
We have lieutenant governor Georgia Georgia of our state of California.
We have Katty Kay and Mary carillo and state of Steve but first, please welcome, to discuss president Obama's new initiative on climate change, please welcome the distinguished proffer of meteorology at Penn State university and co-author of "dire predictions: Understanding climate change," Michael mann.
You're not the director Michael Mann.
You must get that question all the time.
"The last of the mo heroicens.
" Michael: I've never heard that before.
Bill: Obama did something aways magse this week.
Unveiled his power plan.
We are going to be cutting power emissions mostly I think it was 32% by the year 2030? Won't we all be dead by then? Michael: No, the good news is we're still at the point where we can make the sorts of cuts in our carbon emissions that we need to to make sure we don't get irreversible dangerous climate change.
Bill: So it's not too late? Michael: It's not too late.
Bill: You'd have to say that anyway.
What are you going to say, it's too late? Michael: It's a fair point but there's an urgency to acting on this problem.
Unlike anything we've faced before.
If we do not turn our missions around within the emissions around within the next decade then we do lock in those potentially irreversible changes in climate.
We're already seeing negative climate change, I don't have to tell that to Californians when you look at the wildfires and the droughts.
We're already seeing dangerous climate change but if we don't get this problem under control soon, we are looking at the veritable tip of the iceberg.
Bill: I think it was in 2003 or 2004 that James hanson, the famous NASA scientist said if we don't do something in 10 years, we've passed the tipping point.
We've passed that 10 years.
Michael: Hanson made predictions but he's also optimistic, as I am, that we can still prevent that from happening.
Bill: No one will ask you on these shows 6.
I'm kidding about that.
I noticed that the Republicans did not mention global warming once in the debate last the night.
It didn't exist in their world.
They've also moved on from the talking point of "I'm not a scientist," that's yesterday's talking point.
Now it's, "well, it's not settled sunny science.
" It is settled science, right? Michael: You can ask more than 30 scientific societies in the U.
S.
The American meteorological society, I could go on and on.
Bill: And they're not here.
You're here.
So I'm asking you.
It is super, super settled science, right? Michael: Absolutely.
The national academy of sciences was founded by a Republican president, Abraham Lincoln and they've said climate change is real, it's caused by human activity.
It's already a problem.
It's going to be a much worse problem if we don't do something.
There's still time to do something.
Bill: That was a pew poll recently where they named 23 different topics where they would say are the most important things we should address.
Climate change came in 22nd.
23rd was getting cat hair off black pants.
Uh, you know, Obama is trying to do something but the president in a democracy can't be that much better than the people.
They kind of have to be with him.
We're past year 10 years past "an inconvenient truth," when we thought that might make a difference.
What do we need to do to get people to care? Michael: There are reasons to be cautiously optimistic.
The agreement last year, the two biggest carbon emitters in the world, the U.
S.
and China Bill: Not the countries but the people.
I worry that the people think someone is going to invent a super carbon sucking machine.
That's probably unlikely, right? Michael: That's Soldly Dyson, actually.
Bill: It would be awesome.
Please tell them because I think that's one of the problems.
I was giving the commencement address at Berkeley, if I may just tell a quick story.
Thank you.
Michael: My Alma mater? Bill: Ok.
And I went after the student who gave the student address and it was a lovely address but at one point she said I'm 99% sure that someone sitting here in the audience today is going to solve and then she said starvation and cancer and didn't even mention global warming, by the way.
But this idea that someone I would say I'm 99% sure someone in the audience is not going to solve those things because people have to think they're going to do it themselves, not somebody sitting out in the audience.
Michael: It depends on the polls you look at.
There are polls that present a somewhat more optimistic picture.
Upwards of 70% of the American people.
It depend on how you frame the question.
If you ask people do they support an effort to decrease our carbon emissions, move away from coal, embrace renewable energy, you get overwhelming support.
70%, 80% of the American people.
It depends on how you frame the question.
Bill: And what Obama did this week, the Republicans call it a war on coal.
What if we actually called it a war on coal? You might get McCain.
You know? [Applause.]
And what's wrong with a war on coal? We should have a war on coal.
It's completely outdated.
Michael: It's a way to try to marginalize that position, right? When, in fact, the bottom line is we do have to move away from coach.
Coal is the dirtiest, most carbonist source of power Bill: It's stupid.
And solar, I think there are twice as many jobs in solar as comb.
Michael: We have a pretty good source up there.
And we need to be tapping wind.
Germany is getting 30% of their power from renewables alone.
So you can do it.
The rest of the world has to get yoon board.
Bill: But you have to be German.
Thanks, doc, keep doing what you're doing.
Dr.
Michael Mann.
Let's meet our panel.
Thank you.
[Applause.]
Here's our panel he's an MSNBC analyst, vice chair of public fairs at Edelman public relations, and former senior advisor to the McCain-Palin presidential campaign, Steve schmidt.
Steve, how you doing? We all know the lieutenant governor of our state, Gavin newsome is here.
[Cheers.]
Run for governor next time and she's a former assistant to president George W.
Bush and counselor to vice president dick Cheney, Mary matalin.
Hey, Mary.
Great to see you.
Ok.
So obviously we're going to start talking about the debate last night.
We made it so that we came back on the air right after the detective.
Michael: They planned it for you Mary: They planned it on you.
We're going to agree off the bat with you that it was ecstasy.
We loved it.
Its it was a full spectrum ecstatic show.
Yes, you're right.
Bill: I would say it was a full spectrum of ignorance but we'll get to that in a minute.
It's very early but I want to make a prediction.
After one debate I'm going to make a prediction who's going to be the ticket.
Rubio-Carly Fiorina because the Republicans cannot win without some women and some latinos.
If this turns out to be true I will look like a genius because it's August 2015.
Mary: It's not that we need a woman and an hispanic, we need a conservative.
Bill: They're conservative.
Mary: They are.
She's a superstar.
She's brilliant.
Bill: Really? Running trump into the ground.
Mary: She's very smart.
She wanted to understand the Bible so she taught herself greefpblgt she's a very smart woman and she Bill: Well, that's a dumb idea right there.
I want to understand a book written by bronze age desert dwellers who didn't know what a germ or atom was or where the sun went at night.
Mary: You've never read it.
Bill: I have read the Bible.
I took a whole course in out.
It's stupid.
Gavin: You brought it up a moment ago and I think it's profoundly department in the debate what wasn't discussed.
Climate change, social mobility.
Income inequality.
Issues on policing, black lives matter.
We didn't even have a discussion about the economy.
It was an extraordinary debate for what we didn't hear.
Mary: Maybe you should have been the moderator then because they were answering questions.
Bill: The conspiracy of silence just on global warming.
Fire season now is 78 days longer than it was in the 1970's.
To not even bring this us up I find personally insulting.
Do you not believe that climate clang is real and manmade and happening and needs to be addressed? Steve: I believe climate change is real but if you want to impose a trillion dollars of cost on the economy, what are the results? You go to China, bill, you step off the airplane, you'll be nauseous within 30 seconds.
Your eyes will be watering, you can't breathe the air.
So you impose a cost on the U.
S.
Economy while nothing happens in China or India.
It's a global problem.
Bill: Wait a second.
We just made a deal with China.
By the way, they're ahead of the deal.
Steve: Are you kidding me? You go to Beijing and tell me the air is cleaner there than it is in California? Bill: That's what I said.
You're having a bad night.
Of course the air is bad in China.
They're ahead of where they have to be on the deal.
They're anxious to fix it.
Gavin: Steve deserves a little bit of credit.
He worked for a guy that did some decent things on the environment.
We began to radically change the way we produce and exchange energy with our greenhouse program.
prom.
In many respects what the president just tried to do was replicate the successes of California.
This is nod not an ideological debate.
This is about growing our economy and being competitive.
Mary: Let me throw in a fact here.
Bill: This is fucking up your Mike.
Just going to be a minute.
There you go.
Oh, a cross.
Mary: Sorry, sorry.
I'm melting, I'm melting.
It's under here.
Bill: Oh, you got me with your imaginary friend.
Mary: Never have I seen anybody work so hard to deny the existence of something.
You're dedicated to deny the existence.
Bill: We're going to get to this issue but you know what Mary: On climate change.
The number one reducer of emissions in the world and we did it voluntarily is the united states of mark.
The richest countries are the cleanest dunns and the bigger impact we could have on climate change is helping people in hot zones if we really want to help people who are going to suffer from climate change there are many more proposal and policies we could put in place.
Gavin: I live in a state, we're in the fourth year of a drought.
We have 138,000 acres literally on fire right now.
We have serious crisis that exist today, fires and floods.
It's happening.
I keep hearing these fansful alternatives to dealing with reality.
The reality is with us today, not in the future.
Mary: Do you think your forest and reservoir policies and other policies that have put in place in California are less contributory to your fires and floods than compliments change in are you running for governor and you don't know why are you laugh something bill: Let him answer and he'll show you why.
Gavin: It's such a pro posttrouse claim.
The idea that somehow our policies are contributing to our fires.
Our resident Virginias are 33% because it hasn't been raining.
Mary: When was the last time you established a new reservoir? Gavin: We just passed a $7.
5 billion bond.
Mary: 70% of your rain goes into the ocean.
Gavin: I don't understand your arguments.
Bill: The problem isn't the reservoir, it's the water that's not dropping into it.
The water need to come down.
Gavin: We have 100 new resident vas.
Steve: I think Republicans make the mistake being on the wrong side of scientists.
The overwhelming majority of scientists in the world acknowledges there's a problem.
The point where we ought to be able to find middle ground is what is the impact to the economy against the result we wish to achieve? This could not be simply a sentiment of good intentions.
It ought to be a policy that achieves the stated goal of lowering global carbon levels in a way that does not make American workers pay for it, does not make our economy less competitive.
Bill: Such an outdated argument.
I just mentioned to the professor, solar jobs are twice as many as coal jocks.
Mary: Nuclear, are you nuclear? Bill: No.
That's not good either.
Look what happened in Japan.
We don't need it.
We have the sun.
Gavin: The cost of solar has dropped.
Wind jobs, efficiency.
All these things are proven and working.
Steve: And the number one emissions of carbon has been the natural gas production in this country.
Bill: Right.
Gavin: A bridge to a green Bill: Right.
One question about trump.
He certainly gets all the press.
But I hear a lot of people say it's just a bubble, it's going to go away just the way Herman Cain and Michele Bachmann and all those people do.
You kids are a little younger.
That's what they said about Ronald Reagan.
I was 12 years old in 1968 when he first floated the bubb of running.
And it was a joke.
Oh, come on, he has a stupid television show.
He's divorced.
He avoided combat.
He's got weird hair and crazy face paint.
This guy will never for all those people who say Donald trump will not will no go away, I don't think they're right.
He wouldn't have gotten this far.
I don't know the results from last night but fox tried to put a stake in him and I don't think they did.
Steve: I agree.
When you have 17 candidates in the race, he's polling at 25% right now.
He may collapse but he may not and you can certainly be the Republican nominee getting 25%, 26%, 27% of the vote.
And his message is powerful, which is our leaders in Washington are incompetent.
The country is falling apart.
I'm going to fix it and make America great again.
He's not talking about policies.
A lot of what he says is nonsense talk but he is saying things Bill: Steve, listen to you.
Steve: Listen, listen, listen Bill: Other than the fact he has no policies.
Steve: He's saying out loud when what millions of people are screaming at their televisions every night.
Bill: Take, for example, what he said about Obamacare.
I will repeal it and replace it with something terrific.
Is that snsh something terrific.
Gavin: That's the form and substance of fog.
There's nothing there.
Nothing real.
I think this is wearing thin.
I thought last night was the beginning of the process of decoupling ourselves from him and I think once the media starts focusing on the other candidates that's when it begins to shrink and I see that as inevitable, respecting your example of Reagan, this is no Reagan.
I'm not here celebrating Reagan but there were more principles attached to his governing.
Boyfriend he was a little better than something terrific.
Mary: Here's what he has.
And I admit he'd have a better chance of going all the way with hair like yours.
Possible.
Bryant: bill: Dream on, lady.
When's the last time you saw James Carville's hair? I like that hair.
Mary: I like that hair.
Bill: I know, it's been a long time.
Mary: What has been driving conservatives crazy, he has confidence, he doesn't accept the premise of the question and conservatives want someone who's going to stand up for what we believe in.
He's at least standing up for the principles.
Gavin: What are the principles? Mary: That there's a core confidence in government that is missing.
I nome government Government can work.
We made New Orleans work.
You made San Francisco work.
Federalism works.
The federal government is not working 6.
Bill: But to his point earlier, it seems like they don't have any specifics where they don't want to deal with reality.
Mary: Who is they? Bill: The Republicans.
At least the Democrats deal with reality and look in the mirror and ask as a country, whereas everything with the Republicans is it's the fault of China, Mexico and Iran and, of course, lazy takers who use their welfare money to buy drugs.
Steve: I think you saw any number of Republican candidates with an ace persuasional message last night.
Rubio is one of them.
Talked about the sharing, the displacement of middle income workers.
Amazon doesn't own a store.
Donald trump talking about building a great wall with a great door in the middle.
Of course it's all nonsense talk.
Rick Perry, to his credit, gave a great speech where he talked about trumpism as a cancer on conservatism and he's exactly right.
Bill: What does it it say about your party that the guy who's leading you keep saying is full of nonsense? [Applause.]
Steve: It says Bill: You're saying it, I'm not.
Steve: What it says about the party and a Washington is people in country have completely lost trust with their leaders in Washington.
Republicans have seen Republican leaders in Washington spend the country to $18 trillion in debt, abdicate their principles year after year and they're angry as hell about it and they are responding to the angriest messenger.
Bill: Right.
Donald trump between 2:30 and 4 k34r07b last night in the morning put out 30 anger tweets against Megyn Kelly.
Donald trump sued me last year.
He's the most thin-consistentlied person in the world.
What I found interesting we were off for a month and I was reading Hillary Clinton's tweets.
I had a lot of spare time and apparently she gets it that Donald trump is successful with in kind of blustery going at people.
Look at some of trump's tweets.
Frank Lun, TZ is a low class slob who came to my office looking for consulting work and I had zero interest.
Now he picks anti-trump panels.
Your so-called focus groupings are a total joke.
Don't come to my office looking for business again.
You are a clown.
Wow, Megyn Kelly really bombed tonight.
People are going wild on Twitter.
Fun to watch.
Hillary gets it.
This is what works.
Would you like to hear some of her tweets? Bernie Sanders Vermont is a joke.
Your maple syrup has no flavor and your forests a boring.
She, getting it.
Lincoln chaff yes.
Zero%.
Who's your running mate, the margin of error? Seriously, dude, are you a candidate or a great rate on a car loan? Carly Fiorina.
You come off kind of gold Cold, unlikable and entitled and that's coming from me.
Remember, she stopped that at that chipotle in Iowa? I'm glad I didn't tip for that burrito.
If I want to throw my money at Mexicans, I'll buy coke from Jeb bush's kids.
Oh.
She's really getting mean.
Lindsay Graham me and the girls are getting together to see Magic Mike XXL.
You in? Flaws applause [applause.]
.
I don't even know what that means.
"New York times," she has a big fueled with them.
Here's a crossword puzzle for you one across, kiss, two down, my ass.
Bernie Sanders, I'll give you $5 million to show me your death certificate.
Elizabeth Warren, bottled blonde in a pantsuit who won't shut up about the middle class.
Been there, done that bitch.
And, of course, Monica Lewinsky.
I'm still mired.
How you doing? All right.
Let's bring out Caitlin, a contributing editor for the new York monthly, "that's not funny: How college students cannot take a joke.
" How you doing? Pleasure to meet you.
Caitlin: Nice to meet you.
Bill: What a time to have the name Caitlin, huh? Caitlin: It is, really.
I'm going by Bruce now.
Bill: It probably wasn't a problem for the first 20-something years of your life.
Caitlin: There are other problems with it but this is a new commention.
admission.
Bill: When I read your article I thought oh, my gosh, this is the person who's going to continue the discussion about how college kids have no sense of humor.
I mentioned it then Jerry Seinfeld said something.
Chris rock chimed in.
You dealt into why they're too politically correct.
Why? Caitlin: Well, they're the inheritors of 30 years of identity politics and that's part of the problem.
Bill: What is that? Caitlin: Instead of saying we all have general principles by which we live and seek to understand our lives that I'm going to stand up for the feminist cause, for a particular racial or ethnic cause and I'm going to fiercely guard that and completely stand on the side of that issue.
Bill: Tribal.
Caitlin: Yes, it is rather tribal.
I don't blame the kids for this bill: It's the parents, rights? Caitlin: I think so.
When kids come to college.
When they come to any school, they are, by definition, ignorant.
And it is the moral obligation of their teachers, the adults who work in that institution to teach them something.
But there are so many professors who have abdicate that would position and cravenly sealeded to these poor kids who don't know anything yet and the whole system is now being run by the kids who pay tuition who pay the salary.
Bill: We thought college was an institution where you learn and explore and it's really all about keeping the kids paying the tuition.
Caitlin: It is.
It's become a country club.
They lure these kids in that with their wonderful jimmings and farm-to-table dining and idiot politically correct humilities curriculum and the kids end up with these ridiculous debts and the ridiculous sense of I'm not saying the ideas they hold is necessarily a bad idea.
When we were young I grew up in Berkeley and my father was a college professor.
The kids who had progressive ideas, they had skin in the game.
They were leaving school, eating in apartments around Berkeley.
They were paying a tremendous cost for these political ideas.
Now kids, their mom and dad write checks.
They're extremely and they're claiming they're the victims of these microaggressions.
Bill: They need trigger warns.
Caitlin: And they think we're these horrible crass people who don't understand the beauty of life like they do.
If you and I went to the south Bronx and we found some 19-year-olds there and say how much of your day do you spend worrying about microaggression, they wouldn't know whether to laugh or cry? They know we live in a violent crun country with a gun problem.
Bill: You know who else doesn't care about them? Doctors without borders.
They're actually doing something to help the world.
Not just sitting on the Internet.
Caitlin: Exactly.
Again, I don't home hold them responsible.
But the people who teach there should be instructing them they should have free speech, be able to ask my question.
Write anything and subject themselves to the academic discipline and that's largely gone.
Bill: Right.
You went to something called the national association for campus activities where they hire comedians.
Caitlin: Exactly.
Bill: Thastes guy in the 1990's.
I played colleges all the time.
Caitlin: Right.
How'd it go? Bill: I don't remember because I was you know, I used to drink with the kids after the show.
I always say if I ever write a memoir it's going to be called "who was in my body?" It was like drinking with the college kids after wards.
They'd say you want to go out for a drink? I was like fuck yeah, I'd go out for a drink with anybody.
You talked about how these kids come and audition.
This is a big thing.
If you get the gig you make a lot of money.
You go from college to college.
Of course, they never hire the ones who are the funniest.
One guy did a routine about a sassy black friend and the audience loved it and the people whatter who were deciding whether to hire said no, they wouldn't work for us, that's a stereotype.
Saucy black friend.
Caitlin: There were quite a few African-American young women in the crowd whogget it was really hilarious and then these two white girls sitting next to us said he would never.
Why? Because that's perpetuating a stereotype.
But I don't think it's a war we have to worry about because we've already lost the war.
I think the culture war is over.
The other side won and at this point free speech is nothing more than a new sans.
Bill: And it gets worse.
It was in the news this week that the university of new Hampshire this sounds like a joke came up with a bias-free language guide.
Can't say senior citizens anymore.
Senior citizens was itself Caitlin: That was a good thing, right? Bill: Now you have to say people of advanced age.
Like that makes a difference! Poverty-stricken.
No good.
Experiencing poverty.
What the hell is the difference? Rich.
You can't say rich.
Person of material wealth.
Obese.
Again, obese was the nice world.
Kevin: Right.
Now what? Bill: People of size.
Mary: He's making this up.
Bill: I'm not making this up.
Tomboy.
Gender nonconforming.
Foreigner out.
International people.
Homosexual, same-gender loving.
I mean, if this didn't exist, rush limbaugh would have to make it up and he's already gotten fat and rich off liberals.
I mean a person of size.
And whatever, experiencing wealth.
It's why do we have to play these tedious games in 2015? Caitlin: Because it's over.
It's over.
The things that you were observing 20 years ago and that you've been discussing the last 10 or 12 years, they're letting America they were at one point letting America know what the logical end of these things was.
We're there.
We are the logical end.
I unfortunately have two children who have this horrible idea that they should go to college.
I have no one to blame but myself so I'm going to be in the Ponzi scheme myself soon enough.
[Applause.]
Bill: All right.
Thank you.
You're very good on this not just because you're here but because it was the big story when we were off.
I want to talk about animal rights because you and I are completely simpatico on this and something very bad happened while we were off.
They shot that lion, murdered him in cold blood from you no good reason but I've never seen as many people outside of our movement be as aware or care about it as much as now.
So apparently Cecil gave his life for something.
Wear a cross with Cecil on it.
Mary: Ok, fines.
Whatever it takes.
But let's use this as an opportunity to talk about that I'm a carnivore and a fur-loving person.
But oned warriors, battered women, troubled children.
Working with abused dogs and other animals.
Or let's talk about the ag-gag bill that you and I worked on.
Elephants are not being abused anymore in services and N.
I.
H.
Shouldn't be using millions of dollars giving Arab bats Swedish massages or keeping monkeys how to gamble.
Thank you, Cecil, for opening up this conversation.
It doesn't have to be political and you don't have to throw red paint at me.
Gavin: But the next generation in the conversation is the pushback from hunters that are making the case they're the true conservationists.
Bill: That incenses me.
Terms like conservation hunting.
Like somehow we have to kill to save them because when we pay to kill them, we raise money.
Gavin: What was Cecil worth to the economy of Zimbabwe? Millions of dollars.
How many tourists go there year round versus the $55,000 or $ 0,000.
That money goes into the hands of the local government, not the conservation movement.
Steve: The conflation between this outrage and deer hunting is completely specious.
What type of whack job wants to pay $50,000 to go shoot that magnificent animal, behead him, stick the head on the wall.
Skin him, leaving his carcass there.
It's awful.
Mary: You know who goes trophy hunt something men who have trophy lives.
It says a whole lot about the trophy collector.
Would you like any man who had a trophy wife any more than a man who has a trophy skin? Steve: I do think the orca whales held in captivity in Florida these are animals that should not be held in cap activity.
[Applause.]
So the fact that this is that this has occurred hopefully is an opportunity for us to think about about how we relate to some of these great creatures.
Bill: I want to read just a few stats.
I read these back in October.
It was on that show with Ben Aflac so nobody paid attention to it.
The earth has lost 52% of its wildlife in the past 40 years.
We've lost half the animals in 40 years.
76% of fresh water wildlife.
39% of those living on land.
Those are incredible statistics.
Gavin: Every 20 minutes we're going through this mass extinction period.
Every 20 minutes we're losing a species on this earth.
Bill: We can't continue.
It can't just be us and dogs and cats.
Let's get back to what we started to talk about.
There was a question last night in the debate from Facebook.
Somebody asked if any of the candidates had received word from god, he wanted to know on what they should do and take care of first.
Trump heard got gold and went over here.
Is that an appropriate question for a debate? The idea that god is talking to the candidates? Gavin: Politicizing god I don't think is a healthy thing.
For she that was the most cringe worthy and uncomfortable part of the debate.
Mary: Have you ever heard a question like that or would there be a question canned ask like that in a Democratic debate? Bill: No, because they're more rational.
Mary: They were asked a question.
Bill: They would put aside all the cuckoo questions.
They wouldn't have that because they'd be talking about climate change and all the real problems.
There's a football football player named Arian foster and my emailed was filled yesterday about it.
Did you hear? What happened? There's an ESPN magazine article called "the confessions of Arian foster.
" This is a deep, dark secret.
He's secular and may not believe in god.
Atheists, 7.
5 million.
Agnostic, 9.
8.
By the way, they're the same thing.
People like to try to make a difference.
There is none.
That's 17.
3 million people.
The last pew poll Christians were down to 78% of Americans to 70%.
Victory.
And the nuns these are not all atheists but they have no religion.
38 million people.
They're second now behind Evangelicals in America.
It's about time we stop pretending that this is a small group of people.
Coming out of the closet about it.
There's a lot of people out there probably some in the audience tonight.
[Applause.]
Mary: You're conflating two things.
You're conflating a frustration and anger with institutional religion with faith.
They're two different things.
Many people are upset with the church Bill: Not conflating them but they are two different things.
Mary: Atheism is a believe.
Bill: It is not.
It's the absence from a believe.
Mary: You have to be Bill: Some think abstinence is a sex position.
Mary: But it is.
Bill: It's not 6.
Mary: If you have kids our age, abstinence is a sex position.
Bill: No, it's the absence of one.
Ok.
You're familiar with Dana parrino? Mary: Yes, colleagues.
We're all colleagues.
Bill: She worked for bush, right? She was the spokesman.
Shea asked her once about removing god from the pledge of alieges.
She said once about atheists.
I'm tired of them.
If they don't like it they don't have to live here.
Can you imagine saying that about Jews or homosexuals or anybody else? Mary: That doesn't even sound like Dana.
Bill: It's a correct quote.
Mary: Maybe it's true.
I'm defending a person they know.
I would say the essence of my faith I'm a Cath luck.
It's tolerance.
You can believe what you want.
How am I hurting you by believe something bill: You're not.
But this is something you would not tolerate if it was directed at anybody else.
I'm pick aing a making a point about atheists in America.
The geniuses at the debate last night, they think that ISIS and Muslims are the same thing.
Already shiites and sunnis in the Muslim world.
Steve: We would have been much better off asking questions that showed whether the candidates knew the difference between a sunni, a shiite and a kangaroo.
Bill: Once again, Steve, these people are utter idiots and they're my party.
I don't understand how you can be Steve: I know for sure that there are a couple of candidates up there that have deep understanding of these issues and I'm pretty sure listening to some of the answers that there are some keanls with no understanding of some of those issues and it's important as we go through this debate process at a dangerous moment in the country's and world's history that we understand who does get it and who doesn't get it.
Bill: All right.
Thank you very much, panel.
I have to move on right now.
To new rules.
Ok.
[Applause.]
Bill: All right.
New rule stop saying that the two-tiered debate form is turning the Republican presidential race into a reality TV show.
No, it's more like the Westminster kennel club dog show.
You know, where the dogs compete in separate categories.
The big dogs that bark a lot and slobber and the small dogs that wear sweaters and prance.
New rule the makers of the pot of gold at the It's real, folks.
It's real.
The makers of the pot of gold at the end of rainbow St.
Patrick's day cookie cutter has to stop wondering why the cookies come out soft.
[Applause.]
It's not you, honey, it's St.
Patrick's day.
A guy has a little too much to drink, it could happen to anyone.
Have a cookie.
New Louisville let Bill Cosby keep his medal of freedom.
But maybe put a bell in it.
New rule experts must assure the conservatives who think this video of president Obama in Kenya shows a deepen racing across the screen Let's see that again.
Oh.
Oh, definitely, that was absolutely a deepen.
That was not an out of focus boom microphone.
No, it was a hideous demon right from hell and friends, the only way to get rid of a deepen like that is by sencheding your prayers, along with a check to lighthouse mini cities, care of the Reverend William Maher.
Remember, the more you give, the quicker that demon will get noosed.
God bless.
New rule people posting emotional, tear jerker videos on Facebook have to come up with a more original tag line than get your tissues ready.
Sure, it alerts women that they're about to have a good cry but when a man sees "get your tissues" ready, he's thinking of something else entirely.
And finally, new rule When a dentist has 60 grand to drop on a "safari," that's when you know there's too much sugar in the soda.
You know, I don't mind it when really rich people act like assholes wait, no, I do.
I do mind it very much but what can you do? Of course it wasn't right when Donald trump's asshole son, doucheface Von shit-heel trump III snuffed out the life of another beautiful animal to forget about his tiny dick, but I understand it because he's really rich.
But a fucking dentist gets to do this? Your office is in a strip mall next to a Korean nail salon.
You make a living scraping plaque off people's teeth.
And by the way, if you're a dentist itching to travel to another continent to kill something next time grow a pair of balls, go to Syria and take on ISIS.
[Applause.]
Bill: You know, we do have a moral crisis in America, but it doesn't come from saggy pants or gay wedding cakes or Hillary's emails.
It comes from worshiping obscene wealth so much that posing next to the carcass of an endangered species is a way of saying , "hey, look at me.
I'm a soulless prick, just like the super rich.
" This wasn't even about the lion.
Next year it will be buying a bottle of wine for 10 grand or crashing a sports car into a Chuck E.
Cheese, or hiring a sherpa to lug your fat ass up mount Everest.
You see, in America, being filthy rich is the greatest good.
But if you're a dentist you're not rich like that.
But if you save up a couple of times a year, you can splurge on something ridiculous and at least look like it.
Because in the game of America where money counts for everything, this is how you let other people know you won Because you did something horrible and stupid that only rich people can get away with.
We always hear about the sick culture of poverty.
What about the sick culture of wealth? [Applause.]
Last Halloween there was an anonymous letter printed in "slate" from a wealthy homeowner who complained about trick-or-treaters from "other" neighborhoods knocking on his door.
He said, "Halloween isn't a social service or a charity in which I have to buy candy for less fortunate children.
" Wow, save some scrooge for Christmas.
Or take the example of what's going on here in California, where we're having a little problem with water.
There isn't any.
When James Taylor comes here and sings, "I've seen fire and I've seen rain.
" He just says "fire.
" We're living through the worst drought since the 1800's when Jerry brown started keeping records.
But when governor brown asked everyone to cut water usage by 25% water usage in the wealthy enclave of rancho Santa Fe went up.
Local douche bag Steve Yuhas said, "we pay significant property taxes based on where we live, and no, we're not all equal when it comes to water.
People should not be force told live on property with brown lawns and golf on brown courses.
" Yes, the only brown thing allowed on Steve's golf course is the caddies.
What are they booing me for.
Now they applaud me for giving them the finger.
And interior designer.
Gay Butler chimed in, "what are we supposed to do, just have dirt around our four acres?" Yes.
That's what land is.
It's dirt.
What did you think was under the grass, tile? Here's what my lawn looks like now.
Who gives a shit? Doesn't change my life at all.
And by the way, if there really is an interior designer named gay Butler, somewhere there must be a gay Butler named interior designer.
I'm sure that the majority of very rich people have always been greedy and selfish, but this crowd today takes it to a whole new level.
Somehow it's not enough to spend lavishly on themselves.
They have to actively take from others.
Their water, their benefits The last bits of beauty in the world.
In his non-apology/apology, dentist the lion hunter used the word "legal" over and over.
What he did was "legal.
" Sure, because the rich buy politicians to write laws to say that whatever they want is legal.
[Applause.]
Like our elections now.
More than half the money given to presidential candidates so far has come from just 400 families.
Perfectly legal.
But for that kind of money, the rich shouldn't just get to tell politicians what to do.
I think they should get to hunt them.
[Applause.]
That would be the ultimate trophy to go with your trophy kill, your trophy car, and your trophy wife.
What could be better than a trophy Republican candidate's head on your wall? Scott Walker's eyes already look like cheap taxidermy, and Chris Christie's leg would make a lovely umbrella stand.
And if that sounds wrong, we'll make a law that says it's legal.
Thank you very much.
That's our show.
I'll be at the north Charleston center in north Carolina.
At the berg lund theater in Roanoke, Virginia, August 22, at the playhouse on Rodney square in Wilmington, Delaware, I want to thank my guests, Steve Schmidt, Gavin Newsome, Mary Matalin, Caitlin Flanagan, and Michael Mann.
Join us now for "overtime" on YouTube.
Bill: Hello, everybody.
How are you? Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Thank you very much.
How you doing? Thank you.
I've missed you too.
Ah, thank you very much.
Thank you.
So great to be back.
Yes, we were off for the month of July and I have been welcomed back by two Republican debates, thank you, Jesus.
So, did you see both Republican how do you describe this experience? Have you ever taken ecstasy? It was the opposite of that.
Ok? I think the two Republican debates my brain was still trying to recover from the Tsunami of stupid from the first one when I was hit by another wave.
For a minute I thought I was watching a Comedy Central Royce of the U.
S.
constitution.
[Applause.]
And oh, yes.
The first one at the baby table, oh, my gosh.
The first one had Rick Prosecutory, Carly fiorina, Bobby jindal.
Wow, you throw in carrot top, it was a great episode of politically incorrect.
And then there was a little break between debates, during which there was one awkward moment when trump asked rubio to bring his car around.
That was that was a gaffe, I will admit.
And then the main event, and as always at Republican debates, they first brought out Reagan's skull so they could all touch it for luck.
And here's what I think is the big story from this detective.
Now, you have to understand this debate was on fox news.
They did the polling to pick the people and I am quite sure Roger ales who runs that and maybe America, he doesn't like trump.
The word came down get trump.
Kill this fucking Rosemary's baby monster in its black crib I swear, that's exactly what he said.
So they let trump speak three times more than anybody else.
He revealed himself to be nasty, boorish, ignorant, smug.
What they forgot is that's what the Republicans love about him.
[Applause.]
That's why his numbers are double of the guy in second place, who's jeb bush.
But Jeb says he doesn't mind getting the second most vote.
He says that's how his brother got elected president.
[Applause.]
But to understand today's Republican party and I know you want to you have to understand that despite the fact that they had on the stage five governors, three senators, a brain surgeon, first and foremost they wanted to get the opinion of Donald trump, a ham colored cartoon character from "I love the 80's.
" I mean, once you accept that, the rest of the night makes perfect sense.
Mr.
trump, your thoughts on war and peace and then we'll go to the kissing bandit on deficit reduction reduction.
And Dr.
Ruth on entitlement spending and Mr.
T.
On the case of rape and increst.
Beat juice, you have 30 seconds for a rebuttal.
But you know who Republicans are actually mad at today? The moderators.
They thought they were too tough.
I have to give them credit, they were tough.
Especially megyn Kelly, went right at them.
She can be good.
Ben Carson, you don't know dick about anything.
Trump, you're a huge sexist asshole.
Marco Rubio, are you old enough to buy beer? Scott Walker, what's wrong with your face? You look like the kid who's carrying a dead bird in his pocket.
[Applause.]
But you know what, after all the fireworks and the name calling and you hugged him and you hugged him it was the dance that was the same as ever.
Muslims are coming to kill us, Mexicans are coming to rape us and if you get imgreg Pregnant nated by impregnated by one, you have to bring it to term.
That's all they have to sell, fear.
Hope and change, meet pee in pants.
I mean, the entire slate of them up there seemed completely unaware of the fact that women can now vote.
You know, [applause.]
Bill: Megyn Kelly asked trump right off the bat about trump calling women fat pigs, dogs, and slobs.
Trump's answer? I don't have time for political correctness.
He's like one of those construction workers in the 1970's.
Nice tits.
Oh, what, can't compliment a lady film? It's crazy.
They all want to get rid of planned parenthood, that's obvious.
They talk about vaginas like they're the northern lights.
I've never seen it but my friend has.
I hear it's breathtaking.
All right, we have a great show.
You're a great crowd.
[Applause.]
We have lieutenant governor Georgia Georgia of our state of California.
We have Katty Kay and Mary carillo and state of Steve but first, please welcome, to discuss president Obama's new initiative on climate change, please welcome the distinguished proffer of meteorology at Penn State university and co-author of "dire predictions: Understanding climate change," Michael mann.
You're not the director Michael Mann.
You must get that question all the time.
"The last of the mo heroicens.
" Michael: I've never heard that before.
Bill: Obama did something aways magse this week.
Unveiled his power plan.
We are going to be cutting power emissions mostly I think it was 32% by the year 2030? Won't we all be dead by then? Michael: No, the good news is we're still at the point where we can make the sorts of cuts in our carbon emissions that we need to to make sure we don't get irreversible dangerous climate change.
Bill: So it's not too late? Michael: It's not too late.
Bill: You'd have to say that anyway.
What are you going to say, it's too late? Michael: It's a fair point but there's an urgency to acting on this problem.
Unlike anything we've faced before.
If we do not turn our missions around within the emissions around within the next decade then we do lock in those potentially irreversible changes in climate.
We're already seeing negative climate change, I don't have to tell that to Californians when you look at the wildfires and the droughts.
We're already seeing dangerous climate change but if we don't get this problem under control soon, we are looking at the veritable tip of the iceberg.
Bill: I think it was in 2003 or 2004 that James hanson, the famous NASA scientist said if we don't do something in 10 years, we've passed the tipping point.
We've passed that 10 years.
Michael: Hanson made predictions but he's also optimistic, as I am, that we can still prevent that from happening.
Bill: No one will ask you on these shows 6.
I'm kidding about that.
I noticed that the Republicans did not mention global warming once in the debate last the night.
It didn't exist in their world.
They've also moved on from the talking point of "I'm not a scientist," that's yesterday's talking point.
Now it's, "well, it's not settled sunny science.
" It is settled science, right? Michael: You can ask more than 30 scientific societies in the U.
S.
The American meteorological society, I could go on and on.
Bill: And they're not here.
You're here.
So I'm asking you.
It is super, super settled science, right? Michael: Absolutely.
The national academy of sciences was founded by a Republican president, Abraham Lincoln and they've said climate change is real, it's caused by human activity.
It's already a problem.
It's going to be a much worse problem if we don't do something.
There's still time to do something.
Bill: That was a pew poll recently where they named 23 different topics where they would say are the most important things we should address.
Climate change came in 22nd.
23rd was getting cat hair off black pants.
Uh, you know, Obama is trying to do something but the president in a democracy can't be that much better than the people.
They kind of have to be with him.
We're past year 10 years past "an inconvenient truth," when we thought that might make a difference.
What do we need to do to get people to care? Michael: There are reasons to be cautiously optimistic.
The agreement last year, the two biggest carbon emitters in the world, the U.
S.
and China Bill: Not the countries but the people.
I worry that the people think someone is going to invent a super carbon sucking machine.
That's probably unlikely, right? Michael: That's Soldly Dyson, actually.
Bill: It would be awesome.
Please tell them because I think that's one of the problems.
I was giving the commencement address at Berkeley, if I may just tell a quick story.
Thank you.
Michael: My Alma mater? Bill: Ok.
And I went after the student who gave the student address and it was a lovely address but at one point she said I'm 99% sure that someone sitting here in the audience today is going to solve and then she said starvation and cancer and didn't even mention global warming, by the way.
But this idea that someone I would say I'm 99% sure someone in the audience is not going to solve those things because people have to think they're going to do it themselves, not somebody sitting out in the audience.
Michael: It depends on the polls you look at.
There are polls that present a somewhat more optimistic picture.
Upwards of 70% of the American people.
It depend on how you frame the question.
If you ask people do they support an effort to decrease our carbon emissions, move away from coal, embrace renewable energy, you get overwhelming support.
70%, 80% of the American people.
It depends on how you frame the question.
Bill: And what Obama did this week, the Republicans call it a war on coal.
What if we actually called it a war on coal? You might get McCain.
You know? [Applause.]
And what's wrong with a war on coal? We should have a war on coal.
It's completely outdated.
Michael: It's a way to try to marginalize that position, right? When, in fact, the bottom line is we do have to move away from coach.
Coal is the dirtiest, most carbonist source of power Bill: It's stupid.
And solar, I think there are twice as many jobs in solar as comb.
Michael: We have a pretty good source up there.
And we need to be tapping wind.
Germany is getting 30% of their power from renewables alone.
So you can do it.
The rest of the world has to get yoon board.
Bill: But you have to be German.
Thanks, doc, keep doing what you're doing.
Dr.
Michael Mann.
Let's meet our panel.
Thank you.
[Applause.]
Here's our panel he's an MSNBC analyst, vice chair of public fairs at Edelman public relations, and former senior advisor to the McCain-Palin presidential campaign, Steve schmidt.
Steve, how you doing? We all know the lieutenant governor of our state, Gavin newsome is here.
[Cheers.]
Run for governor next time and she's a former assistant to president George W.
Bush and counselor to vice president dick Cheney, Mary matalin.
Hey, Mary.
Great to see you.
Ok.
So obviously we're going to start talking about the debate last night.
We made it so that we came back on the air right after the detective.
Michael: They planned it for you Mary: They planned it on you.
We're going to agree off the bat with you that it was ecstasy.
We loved it.
Its it was a full spectrum ecstatic show.
Yes, you're right.
Bill: I would say it was a full spectrum of ignorance but we'll get to that in a minute.
It's very early but I want to make a prediction.
After one debate I'm going to make a prediction who's going to be the ticket.
Rubio-Carly Fiorina because the Republicans cannot win without some women and some latinos.
If this turns out to be true I will look like a genius because it's August 2015.
Mary: It's not that we need a woman and an hispanic, we need a conservative.
Bill: They're conservative.
Mary: They are.
She's a superstar.
She's brilliant.
Bill: Really? Running trump into the ground.
Mary: She's very smart.
She wanted to understand the Bible so she taught herself greefpblgt she's a very smart woman and she Bill: Well, that's a dumb idea right there.
I want to understand a book written by bronze age desert dwellers who didn't know what a germ or atom was or where the sun went at night.
Mary: You've never read it.
Bill: I have read the Bible.
I took a whole course in out.
It's stupid.
Gavin: You brought it up a moment ago and I think it's profoundly department in the debate what wasn't discussed.
Climate change, social mobility.
Income inequality.
Issues on policing, black lives matter.
We didn't even have a discussion about the economy.
It was an extraordinary debate for what we didn't hear.
Mary: Maybe you should have been the moderator then because they were answering questions.
Bill: The conspiracy of silence just on global warming.
Fire season now is 78 days longer than it was in the 1970's.
To not even bring this us up I find personally insulting.
Do you not believe that climate clang is real and manmade and happening and needs to be addressed? Steve: I believe climate change is real but if you want to impose a trillion dollars of cost on the economy, what are the results? You go to China, bill, you step off the airplane, you'll be nauseous within 30 seconds.
Your eyes will be watering, you can't breathe the air.
So you impose a cost on the U.
S.
Economy while nothing happens in China or India.
It's a global problem.
Bill: Wait a second.
We just made a deal with China.
By the way, they're ahead of the deal.
Steve: Are you kidding me? You go to Beijing and tell me the air is cleaner there than it is in California? Bill: That's what I said.
You're having a bad night.
Of course the air is bad in China.
They're ahead of where they have to be on the deal.
They're anxious to fix it.
Gavin: Steve deserves a little bit of credit.
He worked for a guy that did some decent things on the environment.
We began to radically change the way we produce and exchange energy with our greenhouse program.
prom.
In many respects what the president just tried to do was replicate the successes of California.
This is nod not an ideological debate.
This is about growing our economy and being competitive.
Mary: Let me throw in a fact here.
Bill: This is fucking up your Mike.
Just going to be a minute.
There you go.
Oh, a cross.
Mary: Sorry, sorry.
I'm melting, I'm melting.
It's under here.
Bill: Oh, you got me with your imaginary friend.
Mary: Never have I seen anybody work so hard to deny the existence of something.
You're dedicated to deny the existence.
Bill: We're going to get to this issue but you know what Mary: On climate change.
The number one reducer of emissions in the world and we did it voluntarily is the united states of mark.
The richest countries are the cleanest dunns and the bigger impact we could have on climate change is helping people in hot zones if we really want to help people who are going to suffer from climate change there are many more proposal and policies we could put in place.
Gavin: I live in a state, we're in the fourth year of a drought.
We have 138,000 acres literally on fire right now.
We have serious crisis that exist today, fires and floods.
It's happening.
I keep hearing these fansful alternatives to dealing with reality.
The reality is with us today, not in the future.
Mary: Do you think your forest and reservoir policies and other policies that have put in place in California are less contributory to your fires and floods than compliments change in are you running for governor and you don't know why are you laugh something bill: Let him answer and he'll show you why.
Gavin: It's such a pro posttrouse claim.
The idea that somehow our policies are contributing to our fires.
Our resident Virginias are 33% because it hasn't been raining.
Mary: When was the last time you established a new reservoir? Gavin: We just passed a $7.
5 billion bond.
Mary: 70% of your rain goes into the ocean.
Gavin: I don't understand your arguments.
Bill: The problem isn't the reservoir, it's the water that's not dropping into it.
The water need to come down.
Gavin: We have 100 new resident vas.
Steve: I think Republicans make the mistake being on the wrong side of scientists.
The overwhelming majority of scientists in the world acknowledges there's a problem.
The point where we ought to be able to find middle ground is what is the impact to the economy against the result we wish to achieve? This could not be simply a sentiment of good intentions.
It ought to be a policy that achieves the stated goal of lowering global carbon levels in a way that does not make American workers pay for it, does not make our economy less competitive.
Bill: Such an outdated argument.
I just mentioned to the professor, solar jobs are twice as many as coal jocks.
Mary: Nuclear, are you nuclear? Bill: No.
That's not good either.
Look what happened in Japan.
We don't need it.
We have the sun.
Gavin: The cost of solar has dropped.
Wind jobs, efficiency.
All these things are proven and working.
Steve: And the number one emissions of carbon has been the natural gas production in this country.
Bill: Right.
Gavin: A bridge to a green Bill: Right.
One question about trump.
He certainly gets all the press.
But I hear a lot of people say it's just a bubble, it's going to go away just the way Herman Cain and Michele Bachmann and all those people do.
You kids are a little younger.
That's what they said about Ronald Reagan.
I was 12 years old in 1968 when he first floated the bubb of running.
And it was a joke.
Oh, come on, he has a stupid television show.
He's divorced.
He avoided combat.
He's got weird hair and crazy face paint.
This guy will never for all those people who say Donald trump will not will no go away, I don't think they're right.
He wouldn't have gotten this far.
I don't know the results from last night but fox tried to put a stake in him and I don't think they did.
Steve: I agree.
When you have 17 candidates in the race, he's polling at 25% right now.
He may collapse but he may not and you can certainly be the Republican nominee getting 25%, 26%, 27% of the vote.
And his message is powerful, which is our leaders in Washington are incompetent.
The country is falling apart.
I'm going to fix it and make America great again.
He's not talking about policies.
A lot of what he says is nonsense talk but he is saying things Bill: Steve, listen to you.
Steve: Listen, listen, listen Bill: Other than the fact he has no policies.
Steve: He's saying out loud when what millions of people are screaming at their televisions every night.
Bill: Take, for example, what he said about Obamacare.
I will repeal it and replace it with something terrific.
Is that snsh something terrific.
Gavin: That's the form and substance of fog.
There's nothing there.
Nothing real.
I think this is wearing thin.
I thought last night was the beginning of the process of decoupling ourselves from him and I think once the media starts focusing on the other candidates that's when it begins to shrink and I see that as inevitable, respecting your example of Reagan, this is no Reagan.
I'm not here celebrating Reagan but there were more principles attached to his governing.
Boyfriend he was a little better than something terrific.
Mary: Here's what he has.
And I admit he'd have a better chance of going all the way with hair like yours.
Possible.
Bryant: bill: Dream on, lady.
When's the last time you saw James Carville's hair? I like that hair.
Mary: I like that hair.
Bill: I know, it's been a long time.
Mary: What has been driving conservatives crazy, he has confidence, he doesn't accept the premise of the question and conservatives want someone who's going to stand up for what we believe in.
He's at least standing up for the principles.
Gavin: What are the principles? Mary: That there's a core confidence in government that is missing.
I nome government Government can work.
We made New Orleans work.
You made San Francisco work.
Federalism works.
The federal government is not working 6.
Bill: But to his point earlier, it seems like they don't have any specifics where they don't want to deal with reality.
Mary: Who is they? Bill: The Republicans.
At least the Democrats deal with reality and look in the mirror and ask as a country, whereas everything with the Republicans is it's the fault of China, Mexico and Iran and, of course, lazy takers who use their welfare money to buy drugs.
Steve: I think you saw any number of Republican candidates with an ace persuasional message last night.
Rubio is one of them.
Talked about the sharing, the displacement of middle income workers.
Amazon doesn't own a store.
Donald trump talking about building a great wall with a great door in the middle.
Of course it's all nonsense talk.
Rick Perry, to his credit, gave a great speech where he talked about trumpism as a cancer on conservatism and he's exactly right.
Bill: What does it it say about your party that the guy who's leading you keep saying is full of nonsense? [Applause.]
Steve: It says Bill: You're saying it, I'm not.
Steve: What it says about the party and a Washington is people in country have completely lost trust with their leaders in Washington.
Republicans have seen Republican leaders in Washington spend the country to $18 trillion in debt, abdicate their principles year after year and they're angry as hell about it and they are responding to the angriest messenger.
Bill: Right.
Donald trump between 2:30 and 4 k34r07b last night in the morning put out 30 anger tweets against Megyn Kelly.
Donald trump sued me last year.
He's the most thin-consistentlied person in the world.
What I found interesting we were off for a month and I was reading Hillary Clinton's tweets.
I had a lot of spare time and apparently she gets it that Donald trump is successful with in kind of blustery going at people.
Look at some of trump's tweets.
Frank Lun, TZ is a low class slob who came to my office looking for consulting work and I had zero interest.
Now he picks anti-trump panels.
Your so-called focus groupings are a total joke.
Don't come to my office looking for business again.
You are a clown.
Wow, Megyn Kelly really bombed tonight.
People are going wild on Twitter.
Fun to watch.
Hillary gets it.
This is what works.
Would you like to hear some of her tweets? Bernie Sanders Vermont is a joke.
Your maple syrup has no flavor and your forests a boring.
She, getting it.
Lincoln chaff yes.
Zero%.
Who's your running mate, the margin of error? Seriously, dude, are you a candidate or a great rate on a car loan? Carly Fiorina.
You come off kind of gold Cold, unlikable and entitled and that's coming from me.
Remember, she stopped that at that chipotle in Iowa? I'm glad I didn't tip for that burrito.
If I want to throw my money at Mexicans, I'll buy coke from Jeb bush's kids.
Oh.
She's really getting mean.
Lindsay Graham me and the girls are getting together to see Magic Mike XXL.
You in? Flaws applause [applause.]
.
I don't even know what that means.
"New York times," she has a big fueled with them.
Here's a crossword puzzle for you one across, kiss, two down, my ass.
Bernie Sanders, I'll give you $5 million to show me your death certificate.
Elizabeth Warren, bottled blonde in a pantsuit who won't shut up about the middle class.
Been there, done that bitch.
And, of course, Monica Lewinsky.
I'm still mired.
How you doing? All right.
Let's bring out Caitlin, a contributing editor for the new York monthly, "that's not funny: How college students cannot take a joke.
" How you doing? Pleasure to meet you.
Caitlin: Nice to meet you.
Bill: What a time to have the name Caitlin, huh? Caitlin: It is, really.
I'm going by Bruce now.
Bill: It probably wasn't a problem for the first 20-something years of your life.
Caitlin: There are other problems with it but this is a new commention.
admission.
Bill: When I read your article I thought oh, my gosh, this is the person who's going to continue the discussion about how college kids have no sense of humor.
I mentioned it then Jerry Seinfeld said something.
Chris rock chimed in.
You dealt into why they're too politically correct.
Why? Caitlin: Well, they're the inheritors of 30 years of identity politics and that's part of the problem.
Bill: What is that? Caitlin: Instead of saying we all have general principles by which we live and seek to understand our lives that I'm going to stand up for the feminist cause, for a particular racial or ethnic cause and I'm going to fiercely guard that and completely stand on the side of that issue.
Bill: Tribal.
Caitlin: Yes, it is rather tribal.
I don't blame the kids for this bill: It's the parents, rights? Caitlin: I think so.
When kids come to college.
When they come to any school, they are, by definition, ignorant.
And it is the moral obligation of their teachers, the adults who work in that institution to teach them something.
But there are so many professors who have abdicate that would position and cravenly sealeded to these poor kids who don't know anything yet and the whole system is now being run by the kids who pay tuition who pay the salary.
Bill: We thought college was an institution where you learn and explore and it's really all about keeping the kids paying the tuition.
Caitlin: It is.
It's become a country club.
They lure these kids in that with their wonderful jimmings and farm-to-table dining and idiot politically correct humilities curriculum and the kids end up with these ridiculous debts and the ridiculous sense of I'm not saying the ideas they hold is necessarily a bad idea.
When we were young I grew up in Berkeley and my father was a college professor.
The kids who had progressive ideas, they had skin in the game.
They were leaving school, eating in apartments around Berkeley.
They were paying a tremendous cost for these political ideas.
Now kids, their mom and dad write checks.
They're extremely and they're claiming they're the victims of these microaggressions.
Bill: They need trigger warns.
Caitlin: And they think we're these horrible crass people who don't understand the beauty of life like they do.
If you and I went to the south Bronx and we found some 19-year-olds there and say how much of your day do you spend worrying about microaggression, they wouldn't know whether to laugh or cry? They know we live in a violent crun country with a gun problem.
Bill: You know who else doesn't care about them? Doctors without borders.
They're actually doing something to help the world.
Not just sitting on the Internet.
Caitlin: Exactly.
Again, I don't home hold them responsible.
But the people who teach there should be instructing them they should have free speech, be able to ask my question.
Write anything and subject themselves to the academic discipline and that's largely gone.
Bill: Right.
You went to something called the national association for campus activities where they hire comedians.
Caitlin: Exactly.
Bill: Thastes guy in the 1990's.
I played colleges all the time.
Caitlin: Right.
How'd it go? Bill: I don't remember because I was you know, I used to drink with the kids after the show.
I always say if I ever write a memoir it's going to be called "who was in my body?" It was like drinking with the college kids after wards.
They'd say you want to go out for a drink? I was like fuck yeah, I'd go out for a drink with anybody.
You talked about how these kids come and audition.
This is a big thing.
If you get the gig you make a lot of money.
You go from college to college.
Of course, they never hire the ones who are the funniest.
One guy did a routine about a sassy black friend and the audience loved it and the people whatter who were deciding whether to hire said no, they wouldn't work for us, that's a stereotype.
Saucy black friend.
Caitlin: There were quite a few African-American young women in the crowd whogget it was really hilarious and then these two white girls sitting next to us said he would never.
Why? Because that's perpetuating a stereotype.
But I don't think it's a war we have to worry about because we've already lost the war.
I think the culture war is over.
The other side won and at this point free speech is nothing more than a new sans.
Bill: And it gets worse.
It was in the news this week that the university of new Hampshire this sounds like a joke came up with a bias-free language guide.
Can't say senior citizens anymore.
Senior citizens was itself Caitlin: That was a good thing, right? Bill: Now you have to say people of advanced age.
Like that makes a difference! Poverty-stricken.
No good.
Experiencing poverty.
What the hell is the difference? Rich.
You can't say rich.
Person of material wealth.
Obese.
Again, obese was the nice world.
Kevin: Right.
Now what? Bill: People of size.
Mary: He's making this up.
Bill: I'm not making this up.
Tomboy.
Gender nonconforming.
Foreigner out.
International people.
Homosexual, same-gender loving.
I mean, if this didn't exist, rush limbaugh would have to make it up and he's already gotten fat and rich off liberals.
I mean a person of size.
And whatever, experiencing wealth.
It's why do we have to play these tedious games in 2015? Caitlin: Because it's over.
It's over.
The things that you were observing 20 years ago and that you've been discussing the last 10 or 12 years, they're letting America they were at one point letting America know what the logical end of these things was.
We're there.
We are the logical end.
I unfortunately have two children who have this horrible idea that they should go to college.
I have no one to blame but myself so I'm going to be in the Ponzi scheme myself soon enough.
[Applause.]
Bill: All right.
Thank you.
You're very good on this not just because you're here but because it was the big story when we were off.
I want to talk about animal rights because you and I are completely simpatico on this and something very bad happened while we were off.
They shot that lion, murdered him in cold blood from you no good reason but I've never seen as many people outside of our movement be as aware or care about it as much as now.
So apparently Cecil gave his life for something.
Wear a cross with Cecil on it.
Mary: Ok, fines.
Whatever it takes.
But let's use this as an opportunity to talk about that I'm a carnivore and a fur-loving person.
But oned warriors, battered women, troubled children.
Working with abused dogs and other animals.
Or let's talk about the ag-gag bill that you and I worked on.
Elephants are not being abused anymore in services and N.
I.
H.
Shouldn't be using millions of dollars giving Arab bats Swedish massages or keeping monkeys how to gamble.
Thank you, Cecil, for opening up this conversation.
It doesn't have to be political and you don't have to throw red paint at me.
Gavin: But the next generation in the conversation is the pushback from hunters that are making the case they're the true conservationists.
Bill: That incenses me.
Terms like conservation hunting.
Like somehow we have to kill to save them because when we pay to kill them, we raise money.
Gavin: What was Cecil worth to the economy of Zimbabwe? Millions of dollars.
How many tourists go there year round versus the $55,000 or $ 0,000.
That money goes into the hands of the local government, not the conservation movement.
Steve: The conflation between this outrage and deer hunting is completely specious.
What type of whack job wants to pay $50,000 to go shoot that magnificent animal, behead him, stick the head on the wall.
Skin him, leaving his carcass there.
It's awful.
Mary: You know who goes trophy hunt something men who have trophy lives.
It says a whole lot about the trophy collector.
Would you like any man who had a trophy wife any more than a man who has a trophy skin? Steve: I do think the orca whales held in captivity in Florida these are animals that should not be held in cap activity.
[Applause.]
So the fact that this is that this has occurred hopefully is an opportunity for us to think about about how we relate to some of these great creatures.
Bill: I want to read just a few stats.
I read these back in October.
It was on that show with Ben Aflac so nobody paid attention to it.
The earth has lost 52% of its wildlife in the past 40 years.
We've lost half the animals in 40 years.
76% of fresh water wildlife.
39% of those living on land.
Those are incredible statistics.
Gavin: Every 20 minutes we're going through this mass extinction period.
Every 20 minutes we're losing a species on this earth.
Bill: We can't continue.
It can't just be us and dogs and cats.
Let's get back to what we started to talk about.
There was a question last night in the debate from Facebook.
Somebody asked if any of the candidates had received word from god, he wanted to know on what they should do and take care of first.
Trump heard got gold and went over here.
Is that an appropriate question for a debate? The idea that god is talking to the candidates? Gavin: Politicizing god I don't think is a healthy thing.
For she that was the most cringe worthy and uncomfortable part of the debate.
Mary: Have you ever heard a question like that or would there be a question canned ask like that in a Democratic debate? Bill: No, because they're more rational.
Mary: They were asked a question.
Bill: They would put aside all the cuckoo questions.
They wouldn't have that because they'd be talking about climate change and all the real problems.
There's a football football player named Arian foster and my emailed was filled yesterday about it.
Did you hear? What happened? There's an ESPN magazine article called "the confessions of Arian foster.
" This is a deep, dark secret.
He's secular and may not believe in god.
Atheists, 7.
5 million.
Agnostic, 9.
8.
By the way, they're the same thing.
People like to try to make a difference.
There is none.
That's 17.
3 million people.
The last pew poll Christians were down to 78% of Americans to 70%.
Victory.
And the nuns these are not all atheists but they have no religion.
38 million people.
They're second now behind Evangelicals in America.
It's about time we stop pretending that this is a small group of people.
Coming out of the closet about it.
There's a lot of people out there probably some in the audience tonight.
[Applause.]
Mary: You're conflating two things.
You're conflating a frustration and anger with institutional religion with faith.
They're two different things.
Many people are upset with the church Bill: Not conflating them but they are two different things.
Mary: Atheism is a believe.
Bill: It is not.
It's the absence from a believe.
Mary: You have to be Bill: Some think abstinence is a sex position.
Mary: But it is.
Bill: It's not 6.
Mary: If you have kids our age, abstinence is a sex position.
Bill: No, it's the absence of one.
Ok.
You're familiar with Dana parrino? Mary: Yes, colleagues.
We're all colleagues.
Bill: She worked for bush, right? She was the spokesman.
Shea asked her once about removing god from the pledge of alieges.
She said once about atheists.
I'm tired of them.
If they don't like it they don't have to live here.
Can you imagine saying that about Jews or homosexuals or anybody else? Mary: That doesn't even sound like Dana.
Bill: It's a correct quote.
Mary: Maybe it's true.
I'm defending a person they know.
I would say the essence of my faith I'm a Cath luck.
It's tolerance.
You can believe what you want.
How am I hurting you by believe something bill: You're not.
But this is something you would not tolerate if it was directed at anybody else.
I'm pick aing a making a point about atheists in America.
The geniuses at the debate last night, they think that ISIS and Muslims are the same thing.
Already shiites and sunnis in the Muslim world.
Steve: We would have been much better off asking questions that showed whether the candidates knew the difference between a sunni, a shiite and a kangaroo.
Bill: Once again, Steve, these people are utter idiots and they're my party.
I don't understand how you can be Steve: I know for sure that there are a couple of candidates up there that have deep understanding of these issues and I'm pretty sure listening to some of the answers that there are some keanls with no understanding of some of those issues and it's important as we go through this debate process at a dangerous moment in the country's and world's history that we understand who does get it and who doesn't get it.
Bill: All right.
Thank you very much, panel.
I have to move on right now.
To new rules.
Ok.
[Applause.]
Bill: All right.
New rule stop saying that the two-tiered debate form is turning the Republican presidential race into a reality TV show.
No, it's more like the Westminster kennel club dog show.
You know, where the dogs compete in separate categories.
The big dogs that bark a lot and slobber and the small dogs that wear sweaters and prance.
New rule the makers of the pot of gold at the It's real, folks.
It's real.
The makers of the pot of gold at the end of rainbow St.
Patrick's day cookie cutter has to stop wondering why the cookies come out soft.
[Applause.]
It's not you, honey, it's St.
Patrick's day.
A guy has a little too much to drink, it could happen to anyone.
Have a cookie.
New Louisville let Bill Cosby keep his medal of freedom.
But maybe put a bell in it.
New rule experts must assure the conservatives who think this video of president Obama in Kenya shows a deepen racing across the screen Let's see that again.
Oh.
Oh, definitely, that was absolutely a deepen.
That was not an out of focus boom microphone.
No, it was a hideous demon right from hell and friends, the only way to get rid of a deepen like that is by sencheding your prayers, along with a check to lighthouse mini cities, care of the Reverend William Maher.
Remember, the more you give, the quicker that demon will get noosed.
God bless.
New rule people posting emotional, tear jerker videos on Facebook have to come up with a more original tag line than get your tissues ready.
Sure, it alerts women that they're about to have a good cry but when a man sees "get your tissues" ready, he's thinking of something else entirely.
And finally, new rule When a dentist has 60 grand to drop on a "safari," that's when you know there's too much sugar in the soda.
You know, I don't mind it when really rich people act like assholes wait, no, I do.
I do mind it very much but what can you do? Of course it wasn't right when Donald trump's asshole son, doucheface Von shit-heel trump III snuffed out the life of another beautiful animal to forget about his tiny dick, but I understand it because he's really rich.
But a fucking dentist gets to do this? Your office is in a strip mall next to a Korean nail salon.
You make a living scraping plaque off people's teeth.
And by the way, if you're a dentist itching to travel to another continent to kill something next time grow a pair of balls, go to Syria and take on ISIS.
[Applause.]
Bill: You know, we do have a moral crisis in America, but it doesn't come from saggy pants or gay wedding cakes or Hillary's emails.
It comes from worshiping obscene wealth so much that posing next to the carcass of an endangered species is a way of saying , "hey, look at me.
I'm a soulless prick, just like the super rich.
" This wasn't even about the lion.
Next year it will be buying a bottle of wine for 10 grand or crashing a sports car into a Chuck E.
Cheese, or hiring a sherpa to lug your fat ass up mount Everest.
You see, in America, being filthy rich is the greatest good.
But if you're a dentist you're not rich like that.
But if you save up a couple of times a year, you can splurge on something ridiculous and at least look like it.
Because in the game of America where money counts for everything, this is how you let other people know you won Because you did something horrible and stupid that only rich people can get away with.
We always hear about the sick culture of poverty.
What about the sick culture of wealth? [Applause.]
Last Halloween there was an anonymous letter printed in "slate" from a wealthy homeowner who complained about trick-or-treaters from "other" neighborhoods knocking on his door.
He said, "Halloween isn't a social service or a charity in which I have to buy candy for less fortunate children.
" Wow, save some scrooge for Christmas.
Or take the example of what's going on here in California, where we're having a little problem with water.
There isn't any.
When James Taylor comes here and sings, "I've seen fire and I've seen rain.
" He just says "fire.
" We're living through the worst drought since the 1800's when Jerry brown started keeping records.
But when governor brown asked everyone to cut water usage by 25% water usage in the wealthy enclave of rancho Santa Fe went up.
Local douche bag Steve Yuhas said, "we pay significant property taxes based on where we live, and no, we're not all equal when it comes to water.
People should not be force told live on property with brown lawns and golf on brown courses.
" Yes, the only brown thing allowed on Steve's golf course is the caddies.
What are they booing me for.
Now they applaud me for giving them the finger.
And interior designer.
Gay Butler chimed in, "what are we supposed to do, just have dirt around our four acres?" Yes.
That's what land is.
It's dirt.
What did you think was under the grass, tile? Here's what my lawn looks like now.
Who gives a shit? Doesn't change my life at all.
And by the way, if there really is an interior designer named gay Butler, somewhere there must be a gay Butler named interior designer.
I'm sure that the majority of very rich people have always been greedy and selfish, but this crowd today takes it to a whole new level.
Somehow it's not enough to spend lavishly on themselves.
They have to actively take from others.
Their water, their benefits The last bits of beauty in the world.
In his non-apology/apology, dentist the lion hunter used the word "legal" over and over.
What he did was "legal.
" Sure, because the rich buy politicians to write laws to say that whatever they want is legal.
[Applause.]
Like our elections now.
More than half the money given to presidential candidates so far has come from just 400 families.
Perfectly legal.
But for that kind of money, the rich shouldn't just get to tell politicians what to do.
I think they should get to hunt them.
[Applause.]
That would be the ultimate trophy to go with your trophy kill, your trophy car, and your trophy wife.
What could be better than a trophy Republican candidate's head on your wall? Scott Walker's eyes already look like cheap taxidermy, and Chris Christie's leg would make a lovely umbrella stand.
And if that sounds wrong, we'll make a law that says it's legal.
Thank you very much.
That's our show.
I'll be at the north Charleston center in north Carolina.
At the berg lund theater in Roanoke, Virginia, August 22, at the playhouse on Rodney square in Wilmington, Delaware, I want to thank my guests, Steve Schmidt, Gavin Newsome, Mary Matalin, Caitlin Flanagan, and Michael Mann.
Join us now for "overtime" on YouTube.