Doctor Who (1963) s14e22 Episode Script
The Talons of Weng-Chiang, Part Two
(DOCTOR WHO THEME) (ECHOING ROAR) (SCREECHING ROAR) We might have been killed! It's ten feet, from whiskers to tail.
- We should have taken weapons! - You'd have to harpoon that brute! Shall we tell the blue guards? They'd only call in a sanitary inspector.
It's a guard! It's there to keep people away! What? Now where are we going? It's as black as Newgate's Knocker down here! It's over this way, Mr Jago.
Flickering shadows, Casey.
Trick of the light.
Shadows don't groan, Mr Jago! Shadows don't clank chains and moan like all the demented souls in hell! There's your ghost! Six-Gun Sadie and her Wild West troupe left that behind.
Old lumber sheet and ninepins, that's what you saw! It weren't that old thing! Anyway, I heard it! Ah, Casey, you're a pixilated leprechaun! The course of the River Fleet runs right under the foundations.
What you heard was a clang and the rush of water as they closed the sluice gates on the Thames.
It's easy for you to cast aspersions.
You weren't down here! Somebody else has been down here.
Have you got an admirer, Casey? - A glove, is it? - Yes, a lady's glove, monogrammed E.
B.
Perhaps the ghost dropped it, eh? Come on.
We've had enough of your spook! - No plan of the sewers? - We don't keep plans here, sir, but they connect to the Fleet and then to the river.
- If you have information - We're looking for information ourselves.
Professor Litefoot left a message for you, sir.
It says he'd like to see you at the mortuary straight away.
It does? He's still there.
We found another body after you'd gone.
Another Chinese, just outside.
- Very convenient.
- Very mysterious, sir.
Do you know anything about it? - Yes! I was rescuing the Doctor - Come on, Leela! (JAGO ) Go on home.
Straight home.
You might get mistaken for one of those girls! - Aren't you coming, Mr Jago? - Not yet.
Some paperwork commands my presence, but I shall doubtless descry those lugubrious liniments - at the crepuscular hour! - Eh? See you in the morning! You're a card, Mr Jago, a card and a half! Jiminy, you made me jump! I thought you'd gone, Mr Chang! No, Mr Jago, I have come back to see you.
See me, Mr Chang? Nothing wrong, I hope! Be so kind as to step up to my dressing room and I will explain.
If it's the terms of our contract, we've been attracting such good houses, I've already considered drawing up a fresh agreement, with terms that no other management in London would offer an artiste! What would you say to an extra two per cent? Gross, naturally.
I think you'll agree that'sfair.
Now hear me, Jago.
You remember the cab driver, Buller, who came to see me tonight? Cab driver? Yes.
I want you to forget him, understand? You did not see him.
I did not see him.
Good.
Now you will go from here to your office.
When you sit down at your desk, you will remember only that you have just said goodnight to Casey.
Is that clear? I have just said goodnight to Casey.
Excellent.
Now, go! - You are late! - We should not go tonight, lord.
I must - every night until the time cabinet is found! You are ill! I am dying, Chang! You must bring another linnet to my cage.
- But only yesterday - The disease grows worse! Each distillation lasts less than the time before! And with every missing girl, panic increases.
I fear one will be traced here.
You must be careful! There is always risk of discovery.
Even tonight I acted quickly to keep our secret.
- A man was on his way to police! - Hah! Those dumb-witted oxen! I have given you mental powers undreamt of in this century! You are thousands of years ahead of your time.
- Why fear these primitives? - True, I read their minds with ease, but tonight there was a man whose thoughts were hidden.
- Describe him! - He is a doctor - tall, wide, pale eyes and hair that curls like the ram.
He ask many questions.
A time ancient would not ask questions! A time ancient would know! I fear danger, and have sent a man to kill him.
Your opium-addicted scum are bunglers! You should have done it yourself! If he troubles us further, lord, I will deal with him personally.
Very well.
We're wasting time.
Come! I took some organs for further tests, but I admit to being beaten.
- Beaten? - They were poisoned, one orally, the other intravenously.
I understand you suggested scorpion venom? - Yes, in concentrated form.
- Hmm, you're in this line, I take it? - I've dabbled a bit.
- Surely more than that! A zoologist colleague saw the last cadaver.
He thinks it's the work of a rat, too.
- What an amazing night it's been! - It is not over yet.
Most of the corpses around here are jolly dull.
Now I have two inscrutable Chinks and a poor perisher who was chewed by a giant rat, - having been stabbed by a midget! - A midget? Angle of the wound! We shouldn't be discussing such things in front of the fairer sex! Forgive us, ma'am! - What for? - For being so indelicate in the presence of a lady of refinement! - Does he mean me? - I don't think so.
You say you can tell the height of the attacker by the way the blade was thrust, but when aiming for the heart, we were taught to strike under the breastbone.
Upon my soul! Savage.
Found floating down the Amazon in a hat box! - A hat box? - (POLICEMAN) Professor, still here? I've traced our cab driver - Joseph Buller, 14 Fish Lane, this parish.
Splendid.
You can tell the coroner.
Will someone identify the clothing? His mother-in-law, Nelly Gusset.
Same address.
Deceased has lived there - since his marriage six month ago.
- Anything else? You had a few drinks with Mrs Gusset.
- Did she tell you anything further? - A bearer of sad tidings, sir.
I shared a glass or two while the poor thing got over the shock.
She did mention that the deceased had been in a queer state all day.
Why? It seems his wife, Emma Buller, daughter of the house, didn't come home last night.
Deceased had several drinks and went round to the Palace Theatre.
- The theatre? - Oh, not on pleasure bent, sir.
It seems he believed that's where his wife was to be found.
Mrs Gusset says he went off making horrible asseverations as to his intentions.
Well, put as much in the report as you think will concern the coroner.
It's quite clear the man got stupidly drunk and picked a fight with a dwarf! Yes, sir.
A night's work like that does wonders for my appetite.
- How about some supper? - I'd be delighted.
The police will have the Buller case cleared up in no time, but the Chinese, different kettle of fish, what? Why are you making fire in your mouth? Hasn't the girl seen a pipe before? There's no tobacco where Leela comes from.
Sounds healthy but exceedingly dull! Yes, as I was saying, they're a mysterious lot, the Chinese.
Enigmatic.
I've never understood them, and I was brought up in China.
Really? What were you doing there? My father was Brigadier General in the punitive expedition of 1860, then he stayed in Peking as a palace attaché.
He died there, poor old buffer.
Fireworks at the funeral - odd custom.
Odd people.
- (BANGING) - What's up? Fireworks frighten off evil spirits.
I know that.
Where are you going? You stay with Litefoot.
I'll join you later.
- (LITEFOOT) Where are you going? - Palace Theatre.
There'll be nobody there at this hour! Extraordinary! I say, how can he join us later? - I haven't given him a card! - 4 Ranskill Gardens.
He heard you tell the driver.
- He's as sharp as a trout! - Trout? - (KNOCKING) - All right! Coming! Terrible weather for the time of year! - The theatre's closed! - Sh! - What do you want? - Are you the manager? I'm the owner - Henry Gordon Jago, at the end of a long day, so if you'd kindly state your business How do you do, sir? I'm the Doctor.
- Doctor? - Exactly! I've rumbled your game! I admire your brass, but it won't do! - Call back on Saturday.
- Don't move.
Hold that.
Auditions commence at ten o'clock sharp! Supporting acts booked for one week only.
Hmm? - Is that all? - No.
Dramatic recitations.
I play the Trumpet Voluntary in a bowl of live goldfish.
Don't bother coming back.
I'm also a master hypnotist! Now then .
.
how long since you were under the influence, sir? I'm a man of character and determination, sir.
The Rock of Gibraltar would be more easily .
.
more easily Just as I thought.
And quite recently, too.
What was your last order? To remember nothing since I said goodnight to Casey.
Henry Gordon Jago, I command you to remember everything you were ordered to forget.
When I count to three, you will remember everything.
Onetwothree .
.
more easily influenced than I would.
I have a will of iron! What the dickens am I talking about? Did a cab driver come here tonight? There was a fellow burst in and accosted Mr Chang between shows.
- What did he want? - Something about his Emma.
- Lady friend, no doubt! - Emma Buller, his wife.
She disappeared last night.
Does Mr Chang do a vanishing lady act? You're not suggesting Chang has anything to do with these missing (DOCTOR) What is it? Emma Buller E.
B Where did you find this? In the cellar.
Are you from the police? I'm helping them.
I'd like to see this cellar, Mr Jago.
You're certain these are different streets? The driver has his orders.
Every night we quarter a new sector.
- How much longer?! - Patience, lord.
We know the time cabinet is here.
The cabinet of Weng-Chiang in the house of an infidel! We shall recover it! I grow weary, Chang.
(COUGHS) Tomorrow I bring you two donors - young, plump, high-spirited girls.
The distillation of their life essences will recover your powers, lord.
It was over here.
This is where it was - down here.
- Why were you down here? - I was reassuring Casey.
- Who? - My factotum.
He's been seeing ghosts.
He's about as sharp as the corners of a round table! Jumping Jehoshaphat! What a spider! That must be the grandaddy of them all! - It's a money spider.
- Money spider?! - Yes.
- Don't kill it! Genetic disruption - where does it come from? - What's under here? - You mean right where we're standing? The course of the River Fleet runs right under these foundations.
Excellent! We're getting somewhere! Ah, let's see what we have here.
Mrs Hudson always leaves me a cold collation.
Ham, roast beef, chicken, tongue.
Those look like quail unless I'm much mistaken! Meat! Perhaps we shouldn't wait for the Doctor.
Help yourself.
Plate's on the table.
I'll, um I'll just put a log or two on the fire.
It's good! - I'm so glad.
- Is something wrong? No, would you care for a knife or a fork? It's a good knife.
Aren't you going to eat? Yes, yes.
Just going to eat.
(HUMMING WHINE) Stop! Stop! Somewhere here! Somewhere! One of these dwellings! (REGULAR BEEP) This is the place, Chang! The time cabinet is in there! Leave the rest to your servants, lord.
Go back to your abode.
I must have the time cabinet! (COUGHS) Lord, your weakness grows.
Go back.
Rest.
I will bring the cabinet to you.
Very well, but do not fail me now, Chang! Well, if there is a secret entrance, it's expertly hidden.
(JANGLING) How very interesting! (JAGO ) Oh! Do you know what this is? (DOCTOR SIGHS) Come onRock of Gibraltar (!) Napkin.
Oh, thank you, Professor.
The Doctor's taking a long time.
I hope he did note the address.
- Great Scott! - What is it? There's somebody out there watching the house.
Someone stepped back into the shrubbery as I looked out.
Some scoundrel up to no good! Odd thing, I could swear he was a Chinese! Whoever he is, I'll give him more than he expected! No, you wait here! - How are you feeling? - The ghost, I saw it! - Casey, forgive me! - No, it was a hologram.
I thought there was something unnatural about that cellar! There's nothing unnatural about a holograph technique - a projection of light by laser beam.
It wasn't known in this century.
- Drink this.
You'll feel better.
- What was that? Sh! Agh! (DOCTOR GASPS) (RIPPING FABRICTHUD!) - Oh, Doctor! - Cheer up, Jago.
Cheer up! (DESCENDING FOOTSTEPS) He's gone back to his rats.
Are you all right? Yes, I think so.
Who the devil was it? I've no idea.
He didn't introduce himself.
- Shall I call in the police? - Oh, Henry Gordon Jago! Then our reclusive phantom would simply vanish! Boof! - Good heavens, yes.
- We can tackle it together.
You and I.
What are you going to do? Think.
I'm going to have some supper! (LITEFOOT) Nobody out there.
Fellow must have got wind of (LITEFOOT GROANSTHUD ) Professor? Are you there? Professor!
- We should have taken weapons! - You'd have to harpoon that brute! Shall we tell the blue guards? They'd only call in a sanitary inspector.
It's a guard! It's there to keep people away! What? Now where are we going? It's as black as Newgate's Knocker down here! It's over this way, Mr Jago.
Flickering shadows, Casey.
Trick of the light.
Shadows don't groan, Mr Jago! Shadows don't clank chains and moan like all the demented souls in hell! There's your ghost! Six-Gun Sadie and her Wild West troupe left that behind.
Old lumber sheet and ninepins, that's what you saw! It weren't that old thing! Anyway, I heard it! Ah, Casey, you're a pixilated leprechaun! The course of the River Fleet runs right under the foundations.
What you heard was a clang and the rush of water as they closed the sluice gates on the Thames.
It's easy for you to cast aspersions.
You weren't down here! Somebody else has been down here.
Have you got an admirer, Casey? - A glove, is it? - Yes, a lady's glove, monogrammed E.
B.
Perhaps the ghost dropped it, eh? Come on.
We've had enough of your spook! - No plan of the sewers? - We don't keep plans here, sir, but they connect to the Fleet and then to the river.
- If you have information - We're looking for information ourselves.
Professor Litefoot left a message for you, sir.
It says he'd like to see you at the mortuary straight away.
It does? He's still there.
We found another body after you'd gone.
Another Chinese, just outside.
- Very convenient.
- Very mysterious, sir.
Do you know anything about it? - Yes! I was rescuing the Doctor - Come on, Leela! (JAGO ) Go on home.
Straight home.
You might get mistaken for one of those girls! - Aren't you coming, Mr Jago? - Not yet.
Some paperwork commands my presence, but I shall doubtless descry those lugubrious liniments - at the crepuscular hour! - Eh? See you in the morning! You're a card, Mr Jago, a card and a half! Jiminy, you made me jump! I thought you'd gone, Mr Chang! No, Mr Jago, I have come back to see you.
See me, Mr Chang? Nothing wrong, I hope! Be so kind as to step up to my dressing room and I will explain.
If it's the terms of our contract, we've been attracting such good houses, I've already considered drawing up a fresh agreement, with terms that no other management in London would offer an artiste! What would you say to an extra two per cent? Gross, naturally.
I think you'll agree that'sfair.
Now hear me, Jago.
You remember the cab driver, Buller, who came to see me tonight? Cab driver? Yes.
I want you to forget him, understand? You did not see him.
I did not see him.
Good.
Now you will go from here to your office.
When you sit down at your desk, you will remember only that you have just said goodnight to Casey.
Is that clear? I have just said goodnight to Casey.
Excellent.
Now, go! - You are late! - We should not go tonight, lord.
I must - every night until the time cabinet is found! You are ill! I am dying, Chang! You must bring another linnet to my cage.
- But only yesterday - The disease grows worse! Each distillation lasts less than the time before! And with every missing girl, panic increases.
I fear one will be traced here.
You must be careful! There is always risk of discovery.
Even tonight I acted quickly to keep our secret.
- A man was on his way to police! - Hah! Those dumb-witted oxen! I have given you mental powers undreamt of in this century! You are thousands of years ahead of your time.
- Why fear these primitives? - True, I read their minds with ease, but tonight there was a man whose thoughts were hidden.
- Describe him! - He is a doctor - tall, wide, pale eyes and hair that curls like the ram.
He ask many questions.
A time ancient would not ask questions! A time ancient would know! I fear danger, and have sent a man to kill him.
Your opium-addicted scum are bunglers! You should have done it yourself! If he troubles us further, lord, I will deal with him personally.
Very well.
We're wasting time.
Come! I took some organs for further tests, but I admit to being beaten.
- Beaten? - They were poisoned, one orally, the other intravenously.
I understand you suggested scorpion venom? - Yes, in concentrated form.
- Hmm, you're in this line, I take it? - I've dabbled a bit.
- Surely more than that! A zoologist colleague saw the last cadaver.
He thinks it's the work of a rat, too.
- What an amazing night it's been! - It is not over yet.
Most of the corpses around here are jolly dull.
Now I have two inscrutable Chinks and a poor perisher who was chewed by a giant rat, - having been stabbed by a midget! - A midget? Angle of the wound! We shouldn't be discussing such things in front of the fairer sex! Forgive us, ma'am! - What for? - For being so indelicate in the presence of a lady of refinement! - Does he mean me? - I don't think so.
You say you can tell the height of the attacker by the way the blade was thrust, but when aiming for the heart, we were taught to strike under the breastbone.
Upon my soul! Savage.
Found floating down the Amazon in a hat box! - A hat box? - (POLICEMAN) Professor, still here? I've traced our cab driver - Joseph Buller, 14 Fish Lane, this parish.
Splendid.
You can tell the coroner.
Will someone identify the clothing? His mother-in-law, Nelly Gusset.
Same address.
Deceased has lived there - since his marriage six month ago.
- Anything else? You had a few drinks with Mrs Gusset.
- Did she tell you anything further? - A bearer of sad tidings, sir.
I shared a glass or two while the poor thing got over the shock.
She did mention that the deceased had been in a queer state all day.
Why? It seems his wife, Emma Buller, daughter of the house, didn't come home last night.
Deceased had several drinks and went round to the Palace Theatre.
- The theatre? - Oh, not on pleasure bent, sir.
It seems he believed that's where his wife was to be found.
Mrs Gusset says he went off making horrible asseverations as to his intentions.
Well, put as much in the report as you think will concern the coroner.
It's quite clear the man got stupidly drunk and picked a fight with a dwarf! Yes, sir.
A night's work like that does wonders for my appetite.
- How about some supper? - I'd be delighted.
The police will have the Buller case cleared up in no time, but the Chinese, different kettle of fish, what? Why are you making fire in your mouth? Hasn't the girl seen a pipe before? There's no tobacco where Leela comes from.
Sounds healthy but exceedingly dull! Yes, as I was saying, they're a mysterious lot, the Chinese.
Enigmatic.
I've never understood them, and I was brought up in China.
Really? What were you doing there? My father was Brigadier General in the punitive expedition of 1860, then he stayed in Peking as a palace attaché.
He died there, poor old buffer.
Fireworks at the funeral - odd custom.
Odd people.
- (BANGING) - What's up? Fireworks frighten off evil spirits.
I know that.
Where are you going? You stay with Litefoot.
I'll join you later.
- (LITEFOOT) Where are you going? - Palace Theatre.
There'll be nobody there at this hour! Extraordinary! I say, how can he join us later? - I haven't given him a card! - 4 Ranskill Gardens.
He heard you tell the driver.
- He's as sharp as a trout! - Trout? - (KNOCKING) - All right! Coming! Terrible weather for the time of year! - The theatre's closed! - Sh! - What do you want? - Are you the manager? I'm the owner - Henry Gordon Jago, at the end of a long day, so if you'd kindly state your business How do you do, sir? I'm the Doctor.
- Doctor? - Exactly! I've rumbled your game! I admire your brass, but it won't do! - Call back on Saturday.
- Don't move.
Hold that.
Auditions commence at ten o'clock sharp! Supporting acts booked for one week only.
Hmm? - Is that all? - No.
Dramatic recitations.
I play the Trumpet Voluntary in a bowl of live goldfish.
Don't bother coming back.
I'm also a master hypnotist! Now then .
.
how long since you were under the influence, sir? I'm a man of character and determination, sir.
The Rock of Gibraltar would be more easily .
.
more easily Just as I thought.
And quite recently, too.
What was your last order? To remember nothing since I said goodnight to Casey.
Henry Gordon Jago, I command you to remember everything you were ordered to forget.
When I count to three, you will remember everything.
Onetwothree .
.
more easily influenced than I would.
I have a will of iron! What the dickens am I talking about? Did a cab driver come here tonight? There was a fellow burst in and accosted Mr Chang between shows.
- What did he want? - Something about his Emma.
- Lady friend, no doubt! - Emma Buller, his wife.
She disappeared last night.
Does Mr Chang do a vanishing lady act? You're not suggesting Chang has anything to do with these missing (DOCTOR) What is it? Emma Buller E.
B Where did you find this? In the cellar.
Are you from the police? I'm helping them.
I'd like to see this cellar, Mr Jago.
You're certain these are different streets? The driver has his orders.
Every night we quarter a new sector.
- How much longer?! - Patience, lord.
We know the time cabinet is here.
The cabinet of Weng-Chiang in the house of an infidel! We shall recover it! I grow weary, Chang.
(COUGHS) Tomorrow I bring you two donors - young, plump, high-spirited girls.
The distillation of their life essences will recover your powers, lord.
It was over here.
This is where it was - down here.
- Why were you down here? - I was reassuring Casey.
- Who? - My factotum.
He's been seeing ghosts.
He's about as sharp as the corners of a round table! Jumping Jehoshaphat! What a spider! That must be the grandaddy of them all! - It's a money spider.
- Money spider?! - Yes.
- Don't kill it! Genetic disruption - where does it come from? - What's under here? - You mean right where we're standing? The course of the River Fleet runs right under these foundations.
Excellent! We're getting somewhere! Ah, let's see what we have here.
Mrs Hudson always leaves me a cold collation.
Ham, roast beef, chicken, tongue.
Those look like quail unless I'm much mistaken! Meat! Perhaps we shouldn't wait for the Doctor.
Help yourself.
Plate's on the table.
I'll, um I'll just put a log or two on the fire.
It's good! - I'm so glad.
- Is something wrong? No, would you care for a knife or a fork? It's a good knife.
Aren't you going to eat? Yes, yes.
Just going to eat.
(HUMMING WHINE) Stop! Stop! Somewhere here! Somewhere! One of these dwellings! (REGULAR BEEP) This is the place, Chang! The time cabinet is in there! Leave the rest to your servants, lord.
Go back to your abode.
I must have the time cabinet! (COUGHS) Lord, your weakness grows.
Go back.
Rest.
I will bring the cabinet to you.
Very well, but do not fail me now, Chang! Well, if there is a secret entrance, it's expertly hidden.
(JANGLING) How very interesting! (JAGO ) Oh! Do you know what this is? (DOCTOR SIGHS) Come onRock of Gibraltar (!) Napkin.
Oh, thank you, Professor.
The Doctor's taking a long time.
I hope he did note the address.
- Great Scott! - What is it? There's somebody out there watching the house.
Someone stepped back into the shrubbery as I looked out.
Some scoundrel up to no good! Odd thing, I could swear he was a Chinese! Whoever he is, I'll give him more than he expected! No, you wait here! - How are you feeling? - The ghost, I saw it! - Casey, forgive me! - No, it was a hologram.
I thought there was something unnatural about that cellar! There's nothing unnatural about a holograph technique - a projection of light by laser beam.
It wasn't known in this century.
- Drink this.
You'll feel better.
- What was that? Sh! Agh! (DOCTOR GASPS) (RIPPING FABRICTHUD!) - Oh, Doctor! - Cheer up, Jago.
Cheer up! (DESCENDING FOOTSTEPS) He's gone back to his rats.
Are you all right? Yes, I think so.
Who the devil was it? I've no idea.
He didn't introduce himself.
- Shall I call in the police? - Oh, Henry Gordon Jago! Then our reclusive phantom would simply vanish! Boof! - Good heavens, yes.
- We can tackle it together.
You and I.
What are you going to do? Think.
I'm going to have some supper! (LITEFOOT) Nobody out there.
Fellow must have got wind of (LITEFOOT GROANSTHUD ) Professor? Are you there? Professor!