Arthur (1996) s24e02 Episode Script

1
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Every day when you're
walking down the street ♪
Everybody that you meet
has an original point of view ♪
(laughing)
And I say hey ♪
Hey!
What a wonderful
kind of day ♪
If we could learn
to work and play ♪
And get along
with each other ♪
You got to listen to your
heart, listen to the beat ♪
Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪
Open up your eyes,
open up your ears ♪
Get together
and make things better ♪
By working together ♪
It's a simple message,
and it comes from the heart ♪
Believe in yourself,
for that's the place to start ♪
And I say hey ♪
Hey!
What a wonderful
kind of day ♪
If we could learn
to work and play ♪
And get along
with each other ♪
Hey!
What a wonderful kind of day ♪
Hey!
What a wonderful
kind of day ♪
Hey!
ARTHUR:
Hey, D.W.!
Hey!
Whoa
(crash)
I hope this isn't a puppet show
with stinky sock puppets.
They're the worst.
I saw a show once
where a puppet drank a glass
of water.
It was probably fake water.
No, it was real,
because you could see him
swallowing.
He was going
(glugging)
What kind of puppet show s
this going to?
It's not a puppet show.
You're going to be
making puppets.
I don't know how to make
a puppet.
Well,
you're going to learn.
♪
D.W.:
It better be the good
kind of puppet.
BUSTER:
"D.W.'s New Best Friend."
♪
(talking in background)
This way
for puppet-making.
Have fun, you guys.
Hi, everybody, I'm Hana.
I'm in the eighth grade,
and I'm sort of an expert
on puppets.
So you're in good hands.
She's the teacher?
♪
Anyone know
the Katinka Mink song?
Scraps of paper,
I'll save you for later ♪
Number-one song in the country?
Anyone?
No?
What is she talking about?
We're going to be using
scraps of paper ♪
and glue to make puppets.
It's called papier mâché, and
D.W.:
Papier mâché?
Ugh!
Those are even worse
than sock puppets.
Hey,
Short Stuff,
would you zip it
until I'm done?
Thanks.
Okay.
So was the first day fun?
Would you call
plastering a balloon
with wet paper mush
fun?
It was so stinky.
(sniffs):
Smells like wet cardboard.
(disgusted):
Yeah.
Did you like Hana?
She was mean.
And doesn't comb her hair.
I thought she was nice.
How can you like someone
so bossy?
Sit back,
I can't see out your window.
I get a lot of practice.
♪
Watch out:
Bossypants is coming.
Nice pig.
It's a T. rex.
I knew that.
(breathlessly):
Is that Princess Perky?
You know the Princess Platoon?
Yeah!
Princess Platoon was fierce.
For a year,
I only wore princess dresses.
I got this scar from sleeping
in my tiara.
I got this scar
when I fell on my Glitter Wand.
I knew I liked you.
Is this really
your first puppet?
It is.
I'm impressed.
Serious skillage.
This is my first puppet,
too.
Uh yup.
♪
Tomorrow,
we're making puppet costumes.
Hana says it is just like
making clothes.
Once Hana made a dress
out of cheesecloth.
What kind of cheese
was it?
If it was Swiss,
it'd have a lot of holes.
It's not cheese,
it's cloth.
(gasps):
Look, it's Katinka Mink.
BUD (laughing):
She looks like a little kid
playing dress-up.
No, she doesn't.
She looks fierce.
Hana loves Katinka Mink.
Everyone thinks
they look alike.
Hana says her hair
is messy
because she hates
her comb.
♪
You pick out some apples.
O.
♪
(gasps)
♪
(girls giggling)
Hana!
Hi!
Princess Platoon high-five.
Sparkle up,
sparkle down,
sparkle all around the town.
Guys,
this is my new best friend,
from the puppet workshop.
Hi.
I'm so excited: Katinka Mink is
on the cover of "Pop Quiz."
Isn't that fierce?
We just saw her
on the billboard.
Nice.
Okay, we're going to bounce.
See you tomorrow?
Okay, bye!
Mom, can I get this?
♪
Fierce.
(roaring)
(laughs)
(groans)
There's not enough string
to make Princess Perky's hair.
Hmm
What about using this?
It's not golden.
It doesn't have to be.
Maybe this is Perky's cousin.
But who is she?
D.W.:
Hmm.
She looks like a bug.
She does.
A tiny bug princess.
A ladybug.
Princess Ladybug.
We'll give her wings.
And a tiara.
Yes!
(James screaming)
James's sea monster
is falling apart.
James is, too.
Be right back,
okay, partner?
Okay partner.
(struggling)
I can't wink.
And then we put
on pipe cleaners
for an antenna.
You like Hana now,
don't you?
Hana said I was
her new best friend.
I thought
I was your best friend.
You are, but you're not
my new best friend.
You can't have
two best friends.
Yes, I can.
There can be only one
at the top,
that's the best.
And the one down on the bottom
is the worst.
Best, worst.
What's in here?
Middlest.
Well, then,
you're my middlest friend,
because Hana is
my new best friend.
♪
Do you think
it hurt Bud's feelings
when you said
he wasn't your best friend?
No.
He might have thought
you don't want to be
his friend anymore.
He lives down the street--
we're automatically friends.
(gasps):
Is that Katinka Mink?
She's doing a show
in Elwood City.
I have to call Hana.
(phone ringing)
Yello?
Hana, in Elwood City,
Katinka Mink!
She's going to be singing.
Uh, who is this?
D.W. (on phone):
D.W.
From making puppets?
Oh, ladybug, hey.
Katinka Mink!
Saturday night
at the auditorium.
HANA:
Are you kidding?
I got the flyer.
I am on it.
Thanks, D.W.!
That's what best friends do
for each other, they
(dial tone buzzing)
Hello?
♪
Hooray!
♪
Get up.
(barks)
Go back to sleep.
♪
Fierce.
Whoa!
Was it windy
in your house?
This is my new hair.
(car door closes)
I'm excited to see
your puppets today.
You'll flip.
Afterward, can we bounce over
for some ice creamage?
You sound like Hana.
Really?
That's so fierce!
Looking good, D.W.
Oh, this?
Just some clothes I made.
Remind me after,
I have something for you.
Is it our tickets
to see Katinka Mink?
Our tickets?
I thought I'd sleep over
at your house after the concert.
What?
I'm going with my friends.
But I'm your friend.
Your best friend.
Um, you're
my best little friend.
But the show's
for older kids.
You wouldn't have fun.
Okay, I got to get
this thing going.
Yes, I would.
(sniffling)
Hey, where are you going?
To sit with James.
I got a new best friend,
too.
♪
Okay,
now let's introduce our puppets.
D.W.,
you want to go first?
(sniffling):
This
is Princess Ladybug.
And she's sad right now
because
My new best friend said
I was too small ♪
Too little to go
to the ladybug ball ♪
My dress was a mess
and the hair on my head ♪
I confess I was stressed ♪
Can you guess what I said? ♪
You're wrong, you're wrong ♪
Here's what I've known
all along ♪
As clear as the ring
of a bell or a gong ♪
Making me feel
like I don't belong ♪
You're wrong, you're wrong ♪
Hey, hey, hey, hey
I'm right, I'm right ♪
All day
and all through the night ♪
I'm smart and I'm strong ♪
And I am very polite ♪
Don't want me along
because of my height ♪
You're wrong, I'm right ♪
I may be a bug,
the smallest of things ♪
And when you shrug,
you know that it stings ♪
But there is a secret
a ladybug brings ♪
The power of flowers,
the power of wings ♪
You're wrong, you're wrong ♪
Here's what I've known
all along ♪
As clear as the ring
of a bell or a gong ♪
Making me feel
like I don't belong ♪
You're wrong, you're wrong ♪
The end.
(applauding)
♪
I'm sorry I hurt your feelings
a bit.
A lot!
I have something for you.
I still hope
we can be friends.
I don't know.
I brought you
my old princess dresses
from when I
Really?
For me?
♪
Do you want a raspberry?
It'll make your lips red
if you rub it.
Okay.
♪
Are they red?
Yup.
I'd say you look fierce,
but I don't really use
that word anymore.
T. rex wants some.
(roaring)
(laughing)
Lady Bug wants some, too.
(D.W. and Bud laughing)
(Bud roaring)
KIDS:
And now, a word from us kids.
My name is Sophia,
and this is
my second-grade class.
♪
BOY:
Fashion designing?
Yeah, we're designing fashion.
SOPHIA:
D.W. tried to be like Hana,
like, cool and stuff like that.
And Hana made her own clothes.
So we made our own clothes.
BOY 2:
We wanted to do what we'd liked.
To be, like, extraordinary,
and, like, new.
SOPHIA:
Miss Carma showed us
all the materials
we were going to use.
These are iron-on.
ALL:
Whoa!
Spray paint,
your way to fabulousness.
SOPHIA:
And Miss Lily gave us
some ideas.
This is spray paint for fabric.
(marveling, applauding)
MISS LILY:
And you can do that anywhere
on your shirt
to make the shirt
exactly what you want
We started drawing our designs
on a piece of paper.
♪
GIRL 2:
I made a unicorn.
And I saw
that Sophia was doing it.
And now we both have
unicorn shirts.
Unicorn shirts.
♪
SOPHIA:
We used scissors to cut.
I decided to do fringey
for the sleeves.
SOPHIA:
When our shirts were finished,
we did some fashion photography.
♪
GIRL 3:
I wore a backpack,
because I want to look
like a fashionable
second-grade student.
♪
BOY 1:
I want to look unique,
because everyone is unique.
It makes me feel special.
GIRL 4:
I designed my own shirt,
and it makes me feel proud.
♪
GIRL 5:
I can make it into something
really beautiful,
out of my own imagination.
SOPHIA:
If you do your own design on it,
then it will look cooler.
KIDS:
And now, back to "Arthur"!
RATBURN:
Wake up, Buster.
You're in a classroom,
you're not home in bed.
(yawning)
Our neighbor's dog barks
at night.
Sleep is important
for your brain.
And you'll need your brain
for 25
multiplication questions.
(all groaning)
A test?
RATBURN:
Pencils out, everybody.
BUSTER:
Wouldn't it be better
to take the test outside?
On the swings?
Yes.
No.
Now, I will need to duck
into the teachers' lounge
for a minute.
The lounge?
Teachers have it so easy.
If there is any talking
during this test,
I will know about it.
You may begin.
♪
Just wait.
This only seems
like a normal day.
Shh!
FRANCINE:
"Freaky Tuesday."
♪
Aw, man.
(struggling)
Whoa!
(gasps):
Whoops!
(groaning)
The pencil sharpener is broken.
Does anyone
Buster, no talking.
Just go ask Mr. Ratburn.
♪
Mr. Ratburn?
Are you in here?
Hello?
Whoa.
A magazine rack?
A couch?
No wonder they're always
in here.
(gasps)
A snack table.
"Science Experiment
Spanakopita:
Cooking With Lightning."
Whoa!
(footsteps approaching)
RATBURN:
Buster, you're not supposed
to be in here.
The pencil sharpener exploded.
You may use the sharpener
in here,
but then you must get back
to class.
Was this spanakopita
really cooked with lightning?
Mr. Rambacher,
the new eighth-grade teacher,
is doing experiments
with wait.
Stop.
What?
You're dusting the spanakopita
with pencil shavings.
(both gasping)
(electricity crackling)
(yelps)
(gasps)
(in Ratburn's voice):
What is wrong with my hands?
(in Buster's voice):
What's wrong with my hands?
They're covered with hair.
Why am I wearing a tie?
Why is my pocket full of acorns?
Ah!
Gadzooks!
Is this a hallucination?
I look like you,
and you look like me.
How is this possible?
TINGLEY:
Hello, you two.
I hope you're not touching
that spanakopita.
What?
(chuckling):
Mr. Rambacher
and his experiments.
Who knows what
that spanakopita tastes like?
An electrical transfer.
That explains it.
Now, Buster
You know you're not supposed
to be in the teachers' lounge.
BUSTER:
Sorry, Ms. Tingley.
Oh, Nigel.
You're hilarious!
RATBURN:
She is talking to me,
because I am Buster, obviously.
(in high voice):
But we both need to get back
to class.
Right, Mr. Ratburn?
BUSTER:
Huh?
Oh, yes!
I am Mr. Ratburn.
And we must
return forthwith
to commence our learning.
♪
Wait, I forgot my pencil.
Let's go!
The lightning-charged
spanakopita
must have caused us
to switch bodies.
I should write about this
for an academic journal.
It is so weird
seeing those words
coming out of my mouth.
I need to find
Mr. Rambacher.
You go back to class
and wait for me.
But everyone is going to think
I'm you.
They'll be taking the test
for 20 more minutes
at least.
Okay.
(papers rustling)
BRAIN:
We're done.
Everybody's done?
We've been done
for five minutes,
and we checked our work.
Here you go.
When will we know our score?
Can a score ever really be
known?
What are we doing
in history class today?
History?
(nervously):
Uh it's
going to be amazing.
Full of facts.
And stuff.
(chuckles nervously)
Neckties really keep you warm,
don't they?
Let's open a window.
(struggling):
Painted shut.
(sighs)
Anyway.
The main lesson is
about
Um uh
Ancient Egypt.
(slowly):
We will learn everything
there is to know about it.
Who wants to go first?
RATBURN:
Carl!
(in high voice):
I mean, Mr. Rambacher.
Hello, Buster.
If your lightning-cooked
spanakopita
caused an electron transfer,
how would you reverse
the effects?
I suppose with another charge
of lightning.
(in Ratburn's voice):
I knew it!
(in high voice):
But what if the skies are clear?
I'd use
the Light-o-tronic 9000.
In the old science lab?
That still works?
Oh, yes.
Surprising questions coming
from a third-grader.
It's, um,
a phase I'm going through.
Today it's science--
tomorrow, who knows?
Here, have an acorn.
♪
Buster, may I help you?
(in high voice):
I need to borrow
this spanakopita.
You may not.
Please return to class.
♪
♪
♪
(machine whirring)
(pulsing)
(crackling)
(machine stops abruptly,
Ratburn gasps)
Buster Baxter!
This is dangerous.
(in high voice):
I'm wearing safety goggles.
Mr. Ratburn would never allow
such a thing.
♪
BOTH:
Huh?
♪
What is going on?
Mr. Ratburn has been
so much fun.
♪
TINGLEY:
Mr. Ratburn!
BUSTER:
It's Ancient Egypt in here.
They're building pyramids,
and I'm the sparrow.
(in Ratburn's voice):
It's pharaoh.
May we speak
in the hallway?
(in Ratburn's voice):
All right, children.
Enough shenanigans.
(in high voice):
Is what Mr. Ratburn told me
to tell you.
And trying to zap it
with the Light-o-tronic 9000.
(in Buster's voice):
Huh.
I guess that's
why Buster is our favorite.
On another matter,
have you submitted
your test scores from today?
No.
Nigel.
Report cards cannot be finalized
until all the scores are in.
Today.
Uh
I will get right on it.
RATBURN (in high voice):
These temples
honor Ramses II
and his queen, Nefertari.
RATBURN:
Is Ms. Tingley gone?
BUSTER:
She's returning the spanakopita
to the teachers' lounge.
I'm going to recharge
the spanakopita.
Then we'll be able to switch
back to our own bodies.
Take over till I get back.
Uh Zamboni XI
was the greatest
Egyptian sparrow ever.
He invented the playground.
So outside, everybody.
Time to study.
Woo-hoo!
I love history!
(ringing)
Hello?
♪
Hello?
TINGLEY (on phone):
I'm hanging up now.
(hangs up)
(gasps)
(electricity crackling)
(Light-o-tronic powering down)
TINGLEY:
I can smell the electricity
and feta cheese.
Aha!
Buster?
♪
One down, ten to go.
Can we put our initials
in the wet cement?
No!
You'll get me in trouble.
Go play over there.
I told you he'd say no.
RATBURN:
Here, eat this.
BUSTER:
A rubber glove?
It's spanakopita wrapped
in a rubber glove.
I had to leave
the pan behind
to throw Ms. Tingley
off my scent.
We'll eat the spanakopita
at the same time.
One, two, three eat!
♪
Feel anything?
Nope, nothing.
Drat.
Me, neither.
Maybe we need the pan.
We definitely need
some pepper.
No, the pan conducts
the electricity.
That's what's missing.
TINGLEY:
Buster?
Oh, no, here she comes.
Hey, you're not supposed
to walk on that!
Sorry!
Did I see Buster here?
Which one is Buster, again?
I found the spanakopita
in the lab again.
(with mouth full):
That's too bad.
What are you eating?
Nothing.
Are you still scoring
those tests?
(gulps):
I'm working on it.
They need to be done
now.
We're running out of time.
♪
Just don't walk
on the
(squelching)
(Tingley yelps)
wet cement.
♪
BINKY:
How are you scoring our tests?
For good penmanship,
I draw a .
If all the questions
are answe,
I draw an animal.
How come I got
a smiley face?
You didn't dot your I.
(groans)
Can I do it over?
No.
Don't walk
on the cement.
That's not fair!
Everyone else did.
RATBURN:
Here!
BUSTER:
Hey, not on the tests.
When we switched bodies,
we were both touching the pan
at the same time.
Let's try it again.
One, two, three:
touch!
(both yelp)
Ow, shock!
RATBURN:
Did it work?
BUSTER:
No.
I still have weird hands.
We're not going to be stuck
like this forever, are we?
I don't know.
I thought teachers had it easy.
But they don't.
I'm grading papers
while everyone else is playing.
BUSTER:
I'm having to say no
all the time.
TINGLEY:
There it is!
(Buster and Ratburn yelp)
(wind gusting)
No, no, no, no!
(shoes squelching)
Oh, no!
RATBURN (echoing):
Wake up, Buster.
BUSTER:
Now I'm stuck.
RATBURN:
Wake up, Buster.
(gasps)
BUSTER:
I'm stuck!
RATBURN:
You're in a classroom.
You're not home in bed.
BUSTER:
It was a dream?
I'm me?
Normal hands.
Is that really
Mr. Ratburn?
RATBURN:
Pencils out, everybody.
25 multiplication
questions.
ARTHUR (groans):
A test?
BUSTER:
It is Mr. Ratburn.
BINKY:
Can we take the test
outside?
No.
I need a test,
Mr. Ratburn.
(sighs):
All I want
is to be taking this nice,
easy, fun test.
You may begin.
(yells):
No!
BUSTER:
To watch more "Arthur"
and play games with all
the Elwood City friends,
visit pbskids.org.
You can find "Arthur" books
and lots of other books, too,
at your local library.
♪