Psych s03e01 Episode Script
Ghosts
Previously on Psych I needed to talk to you.
Just say it, say what it is.
I don't want to feel guilty about moving on with my life.
Your mother's not a part of it anymore.
Look.
I don't care what you do, okay? I don't care.
Mom? Dispatch, we've located the stolen vehicle.
Occupants inside.
Approaching now.
10-4, proceed with caution.
Henry, you don't wanna do this.
I don't have a choice, Ray.
Think of the consequences.
I'm way past consequences.
This needs to end tonight.
Whoops.
Whoops? It's my neighbor's car.
We were gonna put it back.
It was just a dare.
Is there a problem here, Officer? You wanted my attention, Shawn, you got it, buddy.
Wait.
You guys know each other? Yeah.
He's sort of my dad.
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask for that "World's Greatest Dad" mug back.
You just keep talking, Shawn.
You keep talking.
Oh, don't worry, I will.
Like when I read you your rights.
Oh, I have rights? That'll be new and fun.
What am I gonna tell your mother? I don't know, you think you can get a hold of her new phone number? I hope it was worth it, smart-ass.
This officially ends your chance of being a cop.
Let's be honest, I gave up wanting to be like you a long time ago.
That's it! Somebody book him.
You, beanpole! Get over here.
Fingerprint him, now.
Oh, I'm, I'm sorry.
Me? Never mind, rookie, I'll do it myself.
Burton Guster.
Dude.
I'm freaking out.
You have to help me.
What's wrong? My mom is here.
She's back in the country? Back in the country? Try, try back in the city.
Try downstairs in my dad's kitchen.
Where are you? Hiding out in my bedroom.
Oh, my God! Holy crap.
I just found an entire unopened box of Shrinky Dinks.
You're hiding in your bedroom because your mom came to visit? Dude, you've got problems.
Are you hearing what I'm saying? My mom is standing downstairs, in my dad's kitchen, laughing it up, having a grand old time.
You don't think that's a little weird? And you're unhappy she's here? No, I'm not unhappy she's here I don't know.
I haven't seen her in three years.
She used to tell me everything.
What's she doing here? Working.
For the police department? I guess, I don't know.
I haven't found out much because, apparently, it's 1988 in my house and no one felt the need to tell me anything.
I know my dad is behind all of this Oh, my God! Furby! Dude, did you know I had a Furby? Shawn, I have no time for this.
I've got my own problems.
I have to go see Frankjim Ogletree.
Frankjim Ogletree? Is that a person or a hippopotamus? He's the new Regional Sales Manager.
My immediate boss.
And a tyrant.
They call him the little Pinochet.
That's too abstract.
Why don't they just call him "jerk pants"? Or "Suck McJones"? They're MIT guys, Shawn.
Now, go face your parents.
You've been wanting to see your mom for ever.
And tell her I'm coming by for some Jell-O cake.
Holy Dude! I just found a pristine issue of Dynamite magazine with Square Pegs on the cover.
Hold on, I'm gonna read "Bummers" to you.
The cheese knife is in the same place, right? Yeah, it's right there.
You want me to give you a hand, hon? Did you just call me "honey"? I did not.
I was going to say "hunchback.
" Oh, Shawnie, look at this.
Not only does your father own a very expensive bottle of Bordeaux, he hand-made little cucumber sandwiches.
Do you believe that? Wow, he is just chock full of surprises today.
Well, I'm allowed to expand my horizons, right? I am so glad to see you, Mom.
What are you doing in town? Well, some police departments occasionally call me up to come back and do psych evaluations.
How long have you known about this? Not long.
I almost didn't do it.
I changed my mind at the last second.
I'm doing Santa Barbara PD, a few in San Diego, the Bay area.
When are our dinner reservations, Henry? Oh, there's dinner plans tonight? You can make it, right? Of course he can make it.
Of course I will come, I just Need to cancel a date but that is not a big deal.
You made other plans? I didn't make other plans.
I didn't know.
Didn't know what? That you were coming.
Henry, why didn't you tell him I was coming? He doesn't have a phone.
You don't have a phone? What I do.
Are you having money problems? Henry, why don't you buy him a phone? Mom, I'm fine.
I'm not having money problems.
I dropped my phone while I was solving a very important crime.
I was on the front page of the newspaper yesterday.
Yeah.
May I speak with you privately? What the hell is going on in there? I tried to tell you, Shawn.
Allow me to demonstrate trying.
"Shawn, guess who's coming back into the country on Friday? "Your mother.
" That's it.
Mission accomplished.
All right! Look, I wanted to clear the air on a few things before she got here.
Clear the air? You think you can undo 15 years of hard feelings with a bottle of Pinot Bordeaux.
I didn't even know Walmart had a wine cellar.
Look, would give me a break? I'm just trying to make a nice night here for her here.
You're sabotaging me.
Why would I do that? I don't know, but I'm gonna figure it out.
You wanted to see me, Mr.
Ogletree? Shut the door, Burton.
I was reading the paper yesterday and something caught my attention.
Have to say I was surprised, considering you seem to already have a full-time job.
This is just something I do on the side.
A hobby, really.
Like collecting thimbles or raising carrier pigeons.
You raise carrier pigeons? No.
Not at all.
That's totally lame.
I just said that because I was flustered.
I raise carrier pigeons.
I'm glad you said that, because I was afraid to tell you how cool I thought carrier pigeons are.
Flying around and carrying stuff.
Coming back.
Awesome, I hear that.
Are you familiar with the exclusivity clause in your contract? It means we don't allow second jobs.
Jobs? No, no.
Psych is more like community service.
And it never affects my work.
This photo was taken Thursday night, I noticed you signed out early that day.
I think the important thing is I signed out.
Let's roll back the clock, shall we? Monday, the 28th, you had three appointments.
You missed all of them.
Tuesday, the 29th, you disappeared after lunch.
And Wednesday, well, here you are.
You did your entire week's work in one afternoon.
It was a crazy week.
It seems to me you had a crazy year.
I have taken the liberty of preparing this for you.
What is this? It's a termination notice.
Or, you could quit your other job.
You tell me.
Good choice.
I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end Shawn, you don't have to walk me through the whole building.
I used to do quite a few sessions here.
This is where I met your father.
I know.
I heard the story.
You did his evaluation after he shot some drug dealer.
He told you that? He twisted his ankle doing security for the Cinnamon Festival.
I had to clear him for duty.
Figures, that's about par.
What happened? He said the two of you are getting along better.
Mom, the last thing I wanna do right now is talk about Henry.
Okay, that's fair.
Let's talk about you.
Who was that date you had to cancel on Friday? Ah, it was just some girl I met.
She was a museum curator.
It's not a big deal, Mom.
I doubt it would've worked out anyway.
How many dates? That would've been the first.
Shawn.
Mom.
Come on, Goose, whenever we talk, you're always about to not go on a second date with somebody new.
I happen to be excellent at first dates.
You know who is having multiple dates? Dad.
I believe he's up to number eight with his Jekyll and Hyde English girlfriend.
You guys should connect more often.
He told me they broke it off a few weeks ago.
We're talking about him again.
Yes, we are.
Let's stop.
I should let you go.
How many of these do you have to do, anyway? Oh, three uniforms and a detective.
Oh.
You wanted to see me, Chief? Yes.
It has come to my attention, Detective, that you've discharged your weapons in the last four cases you've worked.
Thank you.
That wasn't a compliment.
I'm just trying to keep the streets safe, Chief.
The last incident was at a cat show.
Well, let me just go on record as saying that I would never shoot a cat.
I guess I could find some solace in that.
Unless it was approaching in a threatening manner or refused to stop upon my command.
I would probably just fire a warning shot to make my point but it's really a field decision.
I can't commit to it at this juncture.
I've requested a department-sanctioned psychologist to come here and have a session or two with you.
I'm just gonna have to say no.
That wasn't a question.
Could you phrase it like one? Hey, Katie.
Kathy.
Shawn.
Shawn? What the hell are you doing here? I should ask you the same question.
I work here.
Okay.
I should ask you a different question.
Why didn't you return my calls all weekend? Shawn, I had no other choice about all this.
Oh, my God.
This isn't a joke! You're really quitting Psych? I'm so sorry, Shawn.
In a text message, no less? I couldn't think of any other way to tell you.
I knew you would just try to convince me to stay.
Listen, maybe we can still do it on the weekends.
If you're ready to hear some good news, I have worked out a compromise that will solve all of this.
Really? Yes.
You quit this job.
This job, you quit! We take on extra cases to make up the difference in salary.
I make 48 grand a year, Shawn.
What is that? Yen? Who needs $48,000 to live? I need 32.
The other 16 generally goes to you.
Don't be ridiculous.
I claimed you on my taxes, Shawn.
Holy crap, is this Bianca's pappardelle? Mmm-hmm, I found it in the kitchen fridge.
Oh, my God, she's going to go insane.
She hand-rolls the pasta every weekend, Shawn.
They take all day.
She grinds her own spices, Shawn! Well, I thought it was for everybody.
Crap.
Burton? Bianca.
Paul would like to see you.
Mr.
Haversham? Really? Lovely.
I'll be there in a second.
What does she do? She's Haversham's secretary.
Is Haversham the guy who tried to fire you? No.
He's that guy's boss.
Everybody's boss.
He's the VP.
Perfect.
He's the one we have to convince to let you keep doing both jobs.
But I need a second.
I gotta clean my teeth before we go in.
No.
No, no, Shawn.
You're leaving now.
Gus, I'm not budging until we make this nice.
All right, but you asked for it.
Asked for what? Let go of me! Don't you dare go boneless on me, Shawn! Okay! Lower back.
You see? That's why it's not Oh! You son of a bitch! You wanted to see me? Yes, I did.
I have a project for you.
Have a seat.
Is that your wife? My grandmother.
Tell her I said she's lovely.
She died.
I'm going to sit down now.
Lots of talk about this in the office.
Yes, sir.
I'm aware of that, and I've already taken care of it.
I don't think you have.
When my wife and I moved into our house, we were met with a series of unexplained disturbances.
Perhaps fueled by my wife's predilection for the supernatural.
Well, after a while it stopped.
But recently, these occurrences have returned.
To the point where my wife is staying with her mother.
Mr.
Haversham, why are you telling me this? Because I believe my wife believes our house is haunted, and I would like to hire you.
Gus, I had a strange feeling I was needed.
Cool, huh? Looks like word getting out about you moonlighting isn't the worst thing in the world.
Let's be clear.
Haversham is the most powerful man in this office.
He's gonna be running this company sometime soon.
Give the man the respect he deserves.
What is this? His company bio.
Learn it.
"Bred for success"? His father is William Haversham.
Genius entrepreneur.
This guy grew up under the tutelage of a business master and real estate magnate.
I know him.
He's the one who built the Poliodome.
Polodome.
That's a much less depressing name.
Should we go? No.
Meet me at Haversham's at 7:00.
I think I can handle that.
And no whimpering.
And no screaming.
No running from anything.
I don't care how spooky his old house is.
Haversham thinks my nickname is Fearless Guster.
Well, do you want to start some sort of recording device? No.
I don't record my sessions.
I prefer just to talk.
How do you remember the important things? You've heard of a photographic memory? Well, I have a bit of I guess you'd call it an eidetic tonal memory.
So, you'll remember everything I've said? Pretty much.
Yes.
Would you like to start? Yes, first question, where's the bug? The what? The bug.
Nothing new in this area.
Must be concealed on your person.
I honestly don't have anything on me.
Then you wouldn't be opposed to me patting you down? Actually, I'm very opposed to that.
Would you be willing to submit to a polygraph? Shawn, don't do this to me.
You are late.
At this moment, you are officially late! Just call me when you get here.
Hello? Is somebody there? I just heard you squeak.
Damn you, Shawn! I thought you were a ghost from outside.
And yet, you still came in all by your lonesome.
Fearless Guster impresses.
How did you get inside the house? Hadewych, the housekeeper.
She was leaving so she let me in.
Tiny little dollop of a woman, Dutch-Indonesian.
Enormous forearms.
She made me a pannekoek.
It's like a pancake but it is the size of a manhole cover! Are you wearing Haversham's robe? Yep.
You should try it.
The worm that spins this silk is extinct.
You can't find these.
Take it off.
I can't.
Hello? Where are your clothes? In the dryer.
In the dryer? Well, the sauna was a little bit hotter than I was expecting! Mr.
Haversham.
We got here early.
Hadewych let us in.
We love her, and we'd like one of our own.
Is that an ascot? Yes.
Yes, it is.
I like it.
It's a classic accoutrement.
It's nice to see someone with a sense of tradition.
Gus and I are both huge fans of the classics.
To be completely honest, I'm surprised he isn't wearing his spats this evening.
Can we see the epicenter of the ghoulish activity? Please, don't touch anything.
I'm sorry, Mr.
Haversham, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to touch absolutely everything.
Including this naked lady lamp.
I almost might have to sniff some stuff.
Possibly lick some things.
These Tootsie Roll pops come to mind.
Are you a skeptic, sir? Elaine's the real believer, so I guess you could say that.
Just as I thought.
Please leave.
What? Shawn! I'm sorry, sir.
You are a skeptic.
Therefore, you must wait in the hall, preferably at the end.
You're killing all of my jujubes.
Jujubes are candies.
Exactly.
You better take off that robe.
I will.
And I know what you're trying to do.
What? Innocently flip through a photo album? No.
You're sabotaging this on purpose.
Why would I do that? To get me fired so I have no other choice but to go back to Psych.
That's actually an ingenious plan.
But that's not how I play, Gus.
I play fair, and I roll hard.
I'm gonna find this man's ghost and I will rid him of it.
Did Haversham have any enemies? Not really.
Corporate thinks he's a magician.
He completely revamped our inventory system.
Really? Whole system from A to Z, including M? All the vowels? This guy sounds like a real maverick.
Mr.
Haversham, allow me to say this is my most valuable work experience yet.
Well? Allow me to say that I'm not impressed.
Duly noted.
Magnum! Quiet, boy! Stop that! Quiet, boy! What is he barking at? I don't know, he never barks.
Come on, boy.
Come on, that's it.
Here we go.
Dude, look at you.
You were cool as a cucumber while that went down.
Fearless Guster is a badass.
Let's check the basement.
I can't.
Why not? My feet won't move.
So? How did it go? I'm winning.
How are you winning? I answered every question in character as Tom "Gunny" Highway.
Who is Tom "Gunny" Highway? Clint Eastwood's character in Heartbreak Ridge.
It's not a contest, Carlton.
Don't kid yourself, O'Hara, you'll only come out losing.
Losing what? Why are we going to the basement? Because, Gus, that's where ghosts do their thing.
It's cold, and dark, and dusty.
Excuse me.
Can I help you two? Yeah, we're just gonna check out the basement.
We don't go to the basement.
He doesn't go to the basement.
Why is that? Mold spores.
My wife had some workers here.
You can get to the door, but you can't get in 'cause it's bolted shut.
I still think it's probably worth Is that hot chocolate? It's Dutch cocoa.
Hadewych makes a pot for me each night before she leaves.
I see.
Mr.
Haversham, in order to fully understand the connection that you have with this ghost, I will need to see what you see, wear what you wear, drink what you drink.
You're saying you'd like some hot chocolate? Yes.
With marshmallows, please.
Right.
What? It's Dutch! It tastes like it was dipped straight out of Willy Wonka's river.
Would you get serious? Well, he's not the most gracious host, you know.
If he'd just offered I wouldn't have had to ask.
And that pannekoek? Not nearly as filling as it may have seemed.
You're getting hot chocolate on the floor.
Did you see that? What the hell is Magnum! Down, boy! That dog is kind of an "A" hole.
It sees something.
Yeah, urine stains on my pants.
So, what do we do now? I think we stay here.
We close the blinds.
We lock the doors.
We call it a night.
Del Taco? Del Taco? No, not me.
I'm going out there.
Are you kidding me? Shawn, this is what we do.
There's a ghost out there, so would you cut the We need to do this Okay, fine.
Do you have high-end energy efficient xenon flashlights? Pardon me for saying so, but Fearless Guster sucks.
I don't care what you say, we're solving this case.
So suck it up.
Suck what up? What are you talking about? What are you talking about? I don't know.
You got my mind all messed up.
I'm going that direction.
She went that way.
Good luck.
Hey, it's me.
Not letting you do this alone.
Where is he? I got her! What do you mean, you got her? What is going on here? I don't know.
I realized something.
Yesterday, with all that talk about weapons, I neglected to ask you a very important question.
What kind of gun do you carry? Would you like to see it? I would love to.
Picked this up with a little extra cash after I decided not to go with a divorce attorney.
You're going through a separation? Well, yeah.
Yeah, it's You know, she went with one of these high-powered ambulance chasers but that's just her insecurities, you know.
You know who you remind me of? Who? Did you ever see that movie Heartbreak Ridge? Mold spores, Shawn.
Well, I'm attracted to places I'm not allowed to go.
Good luck with your stachybotros virus.
Listen, man, we need to wrap this up quickly.
I have dinner plans with my mom tonight.
I've hardly had a chance to see her at all.
Shawn.
What? Hadewych! It's okay, I'm Shawn Spencer, it's me and my partner, Lemongrass Gogoloab.
Have you noticed anything strange? Only now.
We saw a woman in the woods last night that may not have been alive.
Saturday, the missus, she leave.
Go to mother's, yes? Sunday, I forget my bag, come back.
I hear voices, lady voices in the house.
What did you do? I leave.
Too much strangeness here lately.
Something's off with that woman, Shawn.
Okay.
Nothing's happening.
I gotta go.
What? Gus, we made plans.
My dad has been manipulating her time all week.
Shawn, let me be clear.
I'm not leaving here until Haversham not only wants me to keep moonlighting at Psych forever, but also makes me a partner.
Sorry, buddy.
Wait, what's this? Are you leaving? Mr.
Haversham, it is my belief that we have done all there is to do here tonight.
Tomorrow, we will look into the history of the house, see if there's anything there that can help us.
Just don't have any leads at this point.
So, I think we should all pat each other on the backs for a job well done so far, reconvene first thing in the morning for a nice farmer's breakfast.
I have dinner plans with my mother.
Oh, you made it.
I was sure you weren't gonna make it.
I'm sorry, Ma.
You've no idea the day I've just had.
Well, I'm just running to the ladies'.
We're right over there.
We? Oh.
Your father was lonely and I thought I might have to eat dinner alone, so I let him tag along.
That's fine, right? You're absolutely certain he's my father? Oh! Hey, Shawn.
Grab a menu.
We already ordered.
I'm sure it's all right.
All right, what is this? What is what? This.
What is all of this? The aftershave, pumiced scalp, the suit.
I can wear a suit.
Which one of the three tenors did you borrow that from? Not the dead one, I hope.
It's my suit, Shawn.
I dress up occasionally.
You have a problem with that? No.
I have a problem with this pretend Henry that showed up when Mom got to town.
I don't know where you're going with this.
You're acting like a phony and you know it, and it's bugging the hell out of me.
Look at yourself! Shawn, I order a braised quail salad and all of a sudden you think I'm putting on airs? Excuse me.
Who here has the guinea hen crostone with the liver pancetta? That'd be me.
Everybody here is ordering it.
Look, I'm I'm just gonna make this easier for both of us, okay? I know exactly what you're up to.
And I'm not gonna let it happen.
Let what happen, Shawn? Yeah, if you don't mind my saying so, you've been a real jerk to me all week.
I'm sorry I didn't tell you that your mother was coming back into town.
I'm sorry you think that I messed up your whole youth.
I'm sorry you think that I screwed up your life.
Get over it.
You had your chance.
Now, leave her alone.
Shawn Did you know that Ogletree raises carrier pigeons? Hello? Hello? That's strange.
Who called? Me.
You? Well, there it is again.
That's my number.
From work? No, from here.
The call is coming from inside the house.
Put it on speaker.
Hello? Who is this? Does this number have any other extensions? No.
Well, there's one, but it's not plugged in.
Where is it? I'll go check it out.
It's up in the attic.
The attic? I'll stay on the line.
You Good luck.
Come on.
Don't be mad.
You haunted my boss' house? It was the only way to show him how important and needed you are.
Look how brave you've been.
If we're being honest, I think this has been a real confidence booster for you, buddy.
Plus, once you solve the case, you're a hero, he never bothers you again.
Maybe you get a numbered space in the green lot.
Shawn, stop it.
How did you even Gus.
Friday, after you quit our business, I went to your office in hopes of haunting your Regional Sales Manager, Ogletree.
Unfortunately, he doesn't believe in ghosts, so I had to go a little higher on the rung.
Luckily for me, Katie from Accounts Receivable gave me a little tip about Haversham's wife.
I finally got to use my air conditioner and heating guy disguise.
I had an ultrasonic beeper in my pocket for the dog.
I actually thought you caught that one for a second.
Dude, hear me.
Hadewych! Don't ever, ever put dry ice in your mouth.
Doesn't matter how well you wrap it up.
Okay.
What about the old woman? Young woman.
She does Shakespeare in the Parking Lot down at the Albertsons by La Cumbre Plaza.
She was all stoked to finally have a paying gig.
And ditching the dress in the woods? That was just an improv because who knew Fearless Guster would come after her, you badass.
The rest of it was pretty simple, really.
I even visited Alice Bundy in prison to get a few pointers.
How do we solve it? Solve what? The ghost.
How do we solve a case where you're the culprit? That is a very good question.
I hadn't thought that far ahead.
You haven't thought that far ahead? Well, give me a second.
I'm hiding under the towel.
And then I realize, the towel is my life, and the pool is third grade, and the high dive is my father.
Wow! Oh, wow, I I poured out to you secrets even I didn't know I had.
That was amazing! I mean, so liberating to trust someone with your darkest innermost secrets.
Where have you been? Why haven't you been here before? I used to be here quite a bit.
I just recently came back.
I know someone here who works for the department occasionally.
Actually, he's my son.
Really? Well, you know, I know pretty much everybody who comes through the department.
What's his name? Shawn Spencer.
Ghost gone.
Just like that? Just like that.
It's split.
It's history.
Will not be bothering you again.
And that is a guarantee.
One hundred percent.
How can you guarantee? Please, don't ask.
Just enjoy.
And now, regarding our fee.
Of course, there will be no charge.
Knowing that you appreciate the work that Gus does for the community And for the company.
It's more than enough reward.
But if you were to insist on some sort of expense reimbursement, we, of course, would not accept.
Hmm.
Please, have a seat.
I have a bit of a sixth sense myself, Mr.
Guster.
Helps me out when a business deal is about to go south.
And it's bothering me right now.
I don't understand this guarantee, and I don't like it.
Last night, when that call came in, Guster, you went upstairs.
At the end of that call, I heard something that made me question all of this.
What was it? It was the voice.
Something was wrong with it.
What was wrong with it? It said "Gus.
" Gus? Just like that.
Well, sir, I am pretty sure that that can be easily explained.
Yes.
I'm sure that it can.
But there's something I really need for you to do for me right now.
Yes? Leave.
And, Mr.
Guster, I will carefully ponder my next move and your future with the company.
Let's talk, Burton.
Well, thank you for your time, Mr.
Haversham.
I'm sorry you don't believe me.
But I do understand.
Can we speak privately? Just one second.
What's your game? I have two games, Red Rover and lawn darts.
We'd need at least four for even the most rudimentary game of Rover, and they don't make lawn darts anymore.
Too dangerous.
But that's not why I'm here.
I sensed several things in that house that I couldn't tell you with other people in the room.
This is getting desperate, Mr.
Spencer, but, please, wow me.
You weren't raised by your father.
You were raised by your grandmother.
It was her ring.
Her ring that your wife wears now.
Okay, perhaps my father wasn't as present as I'd hoped and yes, my wife wears my grandmother's ring.
That doesn't mean anything.
Maybe not to you, but the sanctity of marriage means a lot to your grandmother, and having an affair with what? A secretary? That just feels wrong.
No matter how good her pappardelle is.
And just what the hell are you accusing me of? You're getting hot chocolate on the floor.
Is this Bianca's pappardelle? I hear voices.
Lady voices in the house.
No accusations here.
I'm just telling you your grandmother is very disappointed in you.
And she doesn't want you to go to jail.
Nothing you've accused me of is illegal.
He completely revamped our inventory system.
Repackaging samples and reselling them, while lucrative, is highly illegal.
So, what is this, now? A shakedown? There's no shakedown.
I'm just telling you what I know.
I'm a psychic, and with great power comes great responsibility.
And that responsibility, I share with Gus.
All we want is the opportunity to continue doing our work.
Just between us? I'm a psychic.
I can't lie.
Mr.
Guster, get back to work.
As per our conversation, your raise will be reflected in your next check.
I'm sorry, I'm confused.
Spend a little more time in your own business, Frankjim.
Excuse me.
I know about you, too.
His hair is horrible.
She who bore me.
What are you doing here, Goose? Finished working on my case, and I had this amazing idea that I would come by and scoop you up and take you to a movie, and it would just be us.
Actually, your dad was planning on coming by.
Of course, he was.
Okay, I'll go.
Wait.
Enough.
What happened? When? Between you two.
Mom, that is a veritable lifetime of conversations.
Follow me.
No, Mom! Mom, come on! Oh, God! Sit.
Are we really gonna do this? Sit down.
Okay.
What happened? Don't mince words.
With Dad? Mom, we were both there, you know, we don't need to revisit the past.
Maybe we do.
Well, I'm not sure I wanna forgive him for what happened.
The divorce? It wasn't what happened, Mom.
It was the way that it happened.
I mean, let's call it what it was.
He left us.
He left you.
He ended up with the house, and he left you by yourself to pick up the pieces.
That's not exactly what I call hero material, you know? Shawn, I left him.
Come on, Mom.
You don't have to spin this for me, okay? Let me be clear.
Your father was wonderful to me.
He wanted to keep going to counseling, he kept saying we could make it, but the writing was on the wall a long time.
You're losing me here, Mom.
What are you When I got that job, out of town, it was an incredible opportunity.
I was afraid I would never have a chance again, so I took it.
You were into your senior year.
Your path was set.
It seemed the right time, if such a thing is possible.
I thought, of all people, that you would be okay.
But I am so sorry.
Mom, you don't ever have to be sorry about anything.
Don't you spin this.
Sometimes, I get the worst realizations.
I know.
I know that I failed you, but I think that day, my life began again.
That sounds terrible, but don't you ever think I wanted to leave you.
In between the lines there's a lot of obscurity I'm not inclined to resign to maturity If it's all right then you're all wrong But why bounce around to the same damn song? You'd rather run when you can't crawl I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end I know, you know I know, you know
Just say it, say what it is.
I don't want to feel guilty about moving on with my life.
Your mother's not a part of it anymore.
Look.
I don't care what you do, okay? I don't care.
Mom? Dispatch, we've located the stolen vehicle.
Occupants inside.
Approaching now.
10-4, proceed with caution.
Henry, you don't wanna do this.
I don't have a choice, Ray.
Think of the consequences.
I'm way past consequences.
This needs to end tonight.
Whoops.
Whoops? It's my neighbor's car.
We were gonna put it back.
It was just a dare.
Is there a problem here, Officer? You wanted my attention, Shawn, you got it, buddy.
Wait.
You guys know each other? Yeah.
He's sort of my dad.
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask for that "World's Greatest Dad" mug back.
You just keep talking, Shawn.
You keep talking.
Oh, don't worry, I will.
Like when I read you your rights.
Oh, I have rights? That'll be new and fun.
What am I gonna tell your mother? I don't know, you think you can get a hold of her new phone number? I hope it was worth it, smart-ass.
This officially ends your chance of being a cop.
Let's be honest, I gave up wanting to be like you a long time ago.
That's it! Somebody book him.
You, beanpole! Get over here.
Fingerprint him, now.
Oh, I'm, I'm sorry.
Me? Never mind, rookie, I'll do it myself.
Burton Guster.
Dude.
I'm freaking out.
You have to help me.
What's wrong? My mom is here.
She's back in the country? Back in the country? Try, try back in the city.
Try downstairs in my dad's kitchen.
Where are you? Hiding out in my bedroom.
Oh, my God! Holy crap.
I just found an entire unopened box of Shrinky Dinks.
You're hiding in your bedroom because your mom came to visit? Dude, you've got problems.
Are you hearing what I'm saying? My mom is standing downstairs, in my dad's kitchen, laughing it up, having a grand old time.
You don't think that's a little weird? And you're unhappy she's here? No, I'm not unhappy she's here I don't know.
I haven't seen her in three years.
She used to tell me everything.
What's she doing here? Working.
For the police department? I guess, I don't know.
I haven't found out much because, apparently, it's 1988 in my house and no one felt the need to tell me anything.
I know my dad is behind all of this Oh, my God! Furby! Dude, did you know I had a Furby? Shawn, I have no time for this.
I've got my own problems.
I have to go see Frankjim Ogletree.
Frankjim Ogletree? Is that a person or a hippopotamus? He's the new Regional Sales Manager.
My immediate boss.
And a tyrant.
They call him the little Pinochet.
That's too abstract.
Why don't they just call him "jerk pants"? Or "Suck McJones"? They're MIT guys, Shawn.
Now, go face your parents.
You've been wanting to see your mom for ever.
And tell her I'm coming by for some Jell-O cake.
Holy Dude! I just found a pristine issue of Dynamite magazine with Square Pegs on the cover.
Hold on, I'm gonna read "Bummers" to you.
The cheese knife is in the same place, right? Yeah, it's right there.
You want me to give you a hand, hon? Did you just call me "honey"? I did not.
I was going to say "hunchback.
" Oh, Shawnie, look at this.
Not only does your father own a very expensive bottle of Bordeaux, he hand-made little cucumber sandwiches.
Do you believe that? Wow, he is just chock full of surprises today.
Well, I'm allowed to expand my horizons, right? I am so glad to see you, Mom.
What are you doing in town? Well, some police departments occasionally call me up to come back and do psych evaluations.
How long have you known about this? Not long.
I almost didn't do it.
I changed my mind at the last second.
I'm doing Santa Barbara PD, a few in San Diego, the Bay area.
When are our dinner reservations, Henry? Oh, there's dinner plans tonight? You can make it, right? Of course he can make it.
Of course I will come, I just Need to cancel a date but that is not a big deal.
You made other plans? I didn't make other plans.
I didn't know.
Didn't know what? That you were coming.
Henry, why didn't you tell him I was coming? He doesn't have a phone.
You don't have a phone? What I do.
Are you having money problems? Henry, why don't you buy him a phone? Mom, I'm fine.
I'm not having money problems.
I dropped my phone while I was solving a very important crime.
I was on the front page of the newspaper yesterday.
Yeah.
May I speak with you privately? What the hell is going on in there? I tried to tell you, Shawn.
Allow me to demonstrate trying.
"Shawn, guess who's coming back into the country on Friday? "Your mother.
" That's it.
Mission accomplished.
All right! Look, I wanted to clear the air on a few things before she got here.
Clear the air? You think you can undo 15 years of hard feelings with a bottle of Pinot Bordeaux.
I didn't even know Walmart had a wine cellar.
Look, would give me a break? I'm just trying to make a nice night here for her here.
You're sabotaging me.
Why would I do that? I don't know, but I'm gonna figure it out.
You wanted to see me, Mr.
Ogletree? Shut the door, Burton.
I was reading the paper yesterday and something caught my attention.
Have to say I was surprised, considering you seem to already have a full-time job.
This is just something I do on the side.
A hobby, really.
Like collecting thimbles or raising carrier pigeons.
You raise carrier pigeons? No.
Not at all.
That's totally lame.
I just said that because I was flustered.
I raise carrier pigeons.
I'm glad you said that, because I was afraid to tell you how cool I thought carrier pigeons are.
Flying around and carrying stuff.
Coming back.
Awesome, I hear that.
Are you familiar with the exclusivity clause in your contract? It means we don't allow second jobs.
Jobs? No, no.
Psych is more like community service.
And it never affects my work.
This photo was taken Thursday night, I noticed you signed out early that day.
I think the important thing is I signed out.
Let's roll back the clock, shall we? Monday, the 28th, you had three appointments.
You missed all of them.
Tuesday, the 29th, you disappeared after lunch.
And Wednesday, well, here you are.
You did your entire week's work in one afternoon.
It was a crazy week.
It seems to me you had a crazy year.
I have taken the liberty of preparing this for you.
What is this? It's a termination notice.
Or, you could quit your other job.
You tell me.
Good choice.
I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end Shawn, you don't have to walk me through the whole building.
I used to do quite a few sessions here.
This is where I met your father.
I know.
I heard the story.
You did his evaluation after he shot some drug dealer.
He told you that? He twisted his ankle doing security for the Cinnamon Festival.
I had to clear him for duty.
Figures, that's about par.
What happened? He said the two of you are getting along better.
Mom, the last thing I wanna do right now is talk about Henry.
Okay, that's fair.
Let's talk about you.
Who was that date you had to cancel on Friday? Ah, it was just some girl I met.
She was a museum curator.
It's not a big deal, Mom.
I doubt it would've worked out anyway.
How many dates? That would've been the first.
Shawn.
Mom.
Come on, Goose, whenever we talk, you're always about to not go on a second date with somebody new.
I happen to be excellent at first dates.
You know who is having multiple dates? Dad.
I believe he's up to number eight with his Jekyll and Hyde English girlfriend.
You guys should connect more often.
He told me they broke it off a few weeks ago.
We're talking about him again.
Yes, we are.
Let's stop.
I should let you go.
How many of these do you have to do, anyway? Oh, three uniforms and a detective.
Oh.
You wanted to see me, Chief? Yes.
It has come to my attention, Detective, that you've discharged your weapons in the last four cases you've worked.
Thank you.
That wasn't a compliment.
I'm just trying to keep the streets safe, Chief.
The last incident was at a cat show.
Well, let me just go on record as saying that I would never shoot a cat.
I guess I could find some solace in that.
Unless it was approaching in a threatening manner or refused to stop upon my command.
I would probably just fire a warning shot to make my point but it's really a field decision.
I can't commit to it at this juncture.
I've requested a department-sanctioned psychologist to come here and have a session or two with you.
I'm just gonna have to say no.
That wasn't a question.
Could you phrase it like one? Hey, Katie.
Kathy.
Shawn.
Shawn? What the hell are you doing here? I should ask you the same question.
I work here.
Okay.
I should ask you a different question.
Why didn't you return my calls all weekend? Shawn, I had no other choice about all this.
Oh, my God.
This isn't a joke! You're really quitting Psych? I'm so sorry, Shawn.
In a text message, no less? I couldn't think of any other way to tell you.
I knew you would just try to convince me to stay.
Listen, maybe we can still do it on the weekends.
If you're ready to hear some good news, I have worked out a compromise that will solve all of this.
Really? Yes.
You quit this job.
This job, you quit! We take on extra cases to make up the difference in salary.
I make 48 grand a year, Shawn.
What is that? Yen? Who needs $48,000 to live? I need 32.
The other 16 generally goes to you.
Don't be ridiculous.
I claimed you on my taxes, Shawn.
Holy crap, is this Bianca's pappardelle? Mmm-hmm, I found it in the kitchen fridge.
Oh, my God, she's going to go insane.
She hand-rolls the pasta every weekend, Shawn.
They take all day.
She grinds her own spices, Shawn! Well, I thought it was for everybody.
Crap.
Burton? Bianca.
Paul would like to see you.
Mr.
Haversham? Really? Lovely.
I'll be there in a second.
What does she do? She's Haversham's secretary.
Is Haversham the guy who tried to fire you? No.
He's that guy's boss.
Everybody's boss.
He's the VP.
Perfect.
He's the one we have to convince to let you keep doing both jobs.
But I need a second.
I gotta clean my teeth before we go in.
No.
No, no, Shawn.
You're leaving now.
Gus, I'm not budging until we make this nice.
All right, but you asked for it.
Asked for what? Let go of me! Don't you dare go boneless on me, Shawn! Okay! Lower back.
You see? That's why it's not Oh! You son of a bitch! You wanted to see me? Yes, I did.
I have a project for you.
Have a seat.
Is that your wife? My grandmother.
Tell her I said she's lovely.
She died.
I'm going to sit down now.
Lots of talk about this in the office.
Yes, sir.
I'm aware of that, and I've already taken care of it.
I don't think you have.
When my wife and I moved into our house, we were met with a series of unexplained disturbances.
Perhaps fueled by my wife's predilection for the supernatural.
Well, after a while it stopped.
But recently, these occurrences have returned.
To the point where my wife is staying with her mother.
Mr.
Haversham, why are you telling me this? Because I believe my wife believes our house is haunted, and I would like to hire you.
Gus, I had a strange feeling I was needed.
Cool, huh? Looks like word getting out about you moonlighting isn't the worst thing in the world.
Let's be clear.
Haversham is the most powerful man in this office.
He's gonna be running this company sometime soon.
Give the man the respect he deserves.
What is this? His company bio.
Learn it.
"Bred for success"? His father is William Haversham.
Genius entrepreneur.
This guy grew up under the tutelage of a business master and real estate magnate.
I know him.
He's the one who built the Poliodome.
Polodome.
That's a much less depressing name.
Should we go? No.
Meet me at Haversham's at 7:00.
I think I can handle that.
And no whimpering.
And no screaming.
No running from anything.
I don't care how spooky his old house is.
Haversham thinks my nickname is Fearless Guster.
Well, do you want to start some sort of recording device? No.
I don't record my sessions.
I prefer just to talk.
How do you remember the important things? You've heard of a photographic memory? Well, I have a bit of I guess you'd call it an eidetic tonal memory.
So, you'll remember everything I've said? Pretty much.
Yes.
Would you like to start? Yes, first question, where's the bug? The what? The bug.
Nothing new in this area.
Must be concealed on your person.
I honestly don't have anything on me.
Then you wouldn't be opposed to me patting you down? Actually, I'm very opposed to that.
Would you be willing to submit to a polygraph? Shawn, don't do this to me.
You are late.
At this moment, you are officially late! Just call me when you get here.
Hello? Is somebody there? I just heard you squeak.
Damn you, Shawn! I thought you were a ghost from outside.
And yet, you still came in all by your lonesome.
Fearless Guster impresses.
How did you get inside the house? Hadewych, the housekeeper.
She was leaving so she let me in.
Tiny little dollop of a woman, Dutch-Indonesian.
Enormous forearms.
She made me a pannekoek.
It's like a pancake but it is the size of a manhole cover! Are you wearing Haversham's robe? Yep.
You should try it.
The worm that spins this silk is extinct.
You can't find these.
Take it off.
I can't.
Hello? Where are your clothes? In the dryer.
In the dryer? Well, the sauna was a little bit hotter than I was expecting! Mr.
Haversham.
We got here early.
Hadewych let us in.
We love her, and we'd like one of our own.
Is that an ascot? Yes.
Yes, it is.
I like it.
It's a classic accoutrement.
It's nice to see someone with a sense of tradition.
Gus and I are both huge fans of the classics.
To be completely honest, I'm surprised he isn't wearing his spats this evening.
Can we see the epicenter of the ghoulish activity? Please, don't touch anything.
I'm sorry, Mr.
Haversham, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to touch absolutely everything.
Including this naked lady lamp.
I almost might have to sniff some stuff.
Possibly lick some things.
These Tootsie Roll pops come to mind.
Are you a skeptic, sir? Elaine's the real believer, so I guess you could say that.
Just as I thought.
Please leave.
What? Shawn! I'm sorry, sir.
You are a skeptic.
Therefore, you must wait in the hall, preferably at the end.
You're killing all of my jujubes.
Jujubes are candies.
Exactly.
You better take off that robe.
I will.
And I know what you're trying to do.
What? Innocently flip through a photo album? No.
You're sabotaging this on purpose.
Why would I do that? To get me fired so I have no other choice but to go back to Psych.
That's actually an ingenious plan.
But that's not how I play, Gus.
I play fair, and I roll hard.
I'm gonna find this man's ghost and I will rid him of it.
Did Haversham have any enemies? Not really.
Corporate thinks he's a magician.
He completely revamped our inventory system.
Really? Whole system from A to Z, including M? All the vowels? This guy sounds like a real maverick.
Mr.
Haversham, allow me to say this is my most valuable work experience yet.
Well? Allow me to say that I'm not impressed.
Duly noted.
Magnum! Quiet, boy! Stop that! Quiet, boy! What is he barking at? I don't know, he never barks.
Come on, boy.
Come on, that's it.
Here we go.
Dude, look at you.
You were cool as a cucumber while that went down.
Fearless Guster is a badass.
Let's check the basement.
I can't.
Why not? My feet won't move.
So? How did it go? I'm winning.
How are you winning? I answered every question in character as Tom "Gunny" Highway.
Who is Tom "Gunny" Highway? Clint Eastwood's character in Heartbreak Ridge.
It's not a contest, Carlton.
Don't kid yourself, O'Hara, you'll only come out losing.
Losing what? Why are we going to the basement? Because, Gus, that's where ghosts do their thing.
It's cold, and dark, and dusty.
Excuse me.
Can I help you two? Yeah, we're just gonna check out the basement.
We don't go to the basement.
He doesn't go to the basement.
Why is that? Mold spores.
My wife had some workers here.
You can get to the door, but you can't get in 'cause it's bolted shut.
I still think it's probably worth Is that hot chocolate? It's Dutch cocoa.
Hadewych makes a pot for me each night before she leaves.
I see.
Mr.
Haversham, in order to fully understand the connection that you have with this ghost, I will need to see what you see, wear what you wear, drink what you drink.
You're saying you'd like some hot chocolate? Yes.
With marshmallows, please.
Right.
What? It's Dutch! It tastes like it was dipped straight out of Willy Wonka's river.
Would you get serious? Well, he's not the most gracious host, you know.
If he'd just offered I wouldn't have had to ask.
And that pannekoek? Not nearly as filling as it may have seemed.
You're getting hot chocolate on the floor.
Did you see that? What the hell is Magnum! Down, boy! That dog is kind of an "A" hole.
It sees something.
Yeah, urine stains on my pants.
So, what do we do now? I think we stay here.
We close the blinds.
We lock the doors.
We call it a night.
Del Taco? Del Taco? No, not me.
I'm going out there.
Are you kidding me? Shawn, this is what we do.
There's a ghost out there, so would you cut the We need to do this Okay, fine.
Do you have high-end energy efficient xenon flashlights? Pardon me for saying so, but Fearless Guster sucks.
I don't care what you say, we're solving this case.
So suck it up.
Suck what up? What are you talking about? What are you talking about? I don't know.
You got my mind all messed up.
I'm going that direction.
She went that way.
Good luck.
Hey, it's me.
Not letting you do this alone.
Where is he? I got her! What do you mean, you got her? What is going on here? I don't know.
I realized something.
Yesterday, with all that talk about weapons, I neglected to ask you a very important question.
What kind of gun do you carry? Would you like to see it? I would love to.
Picked this up with a little extra cash after I decided not to go with a divorce attorney.
You're going through a separation? Well, yeah.
Yeah, it's You know, she went with one of these high-powered ambulance chasers but that's just her insecurities, you know.
You know who you remind me of? Who? Did you ever see that movie Heartbreak Ridge? Mold spores, Shawn.
Well, I'm attracted to places I'm not allowed to go.
Good luck with your stachybotros virus.
Listen, man, we need to wrap this up quickly.
I have dinner plans with my mom tonight.
I've hardly had a chance to see her at all.
Shawn.
What? Hadewych! It's okay, I'm Shawn Spencer, it's me and my partner, Lemongrass Gogoloab.
Have you noticed anything strange? Only now.
We saw a woman in the woods last night that may not have been alive.
Saturday, the missus, she leave.
Go to mother's, yes? Sunday, I forget my bag, come back.
I hear voices, lady voices in the house.
What did you do? I leave.
Too much strangeness here lately.
Something's off with that woman, Shawn.
Okay.
Nothing's happening.
I gotta go.
What? Gus, we made plans.
My dad has been manipulating her time all week.
Shawn, let me be clear.
I'm not leaving here until Haversham not only wants me to keep moonlighting at Psych forever, but also makes me a partner.
Sorry, buddy.
Wait, what's this? Are you leaving? Mr.
Haversham, it is my belief that we have done all there is to do here tonight.
Tomorrow, we will look into the history of the house, see if there's anything there that can help us.
Just don't have any leads at this point.
So, I think we should all pat each other on the backs for a job well done so far, reconvene first thing in the morning for a nice farmer's breakfast.
I have dinner plans with my mother.
Oh, you made it.
I was sure you weren't gonna make it.
I'm sorry, Ma.
You've no idea the day I've just had.
Well, I'm just running to the ladies'.
We're right over there.
We? Oh.
Your father was lonely and I thought I might have to eat dinner alone, so I let him tag along.
That's fine, right? You're absolutely certain he's my father? Oh! Hey, Shawn.
Grab a menu.
We already ordered.
I'm sure it's all right.
All right, what is this? What is what? This.
What is all of this? The aftershave, pumiced scalp, the suit.
I can wear a suit.
Which one of the three tenors did you borrow that from? Not the dead one, I hope.
It's my suit, Shawn.
I dress up occasionally.
You have a problem with that? No.
I have a problem with this pretend Henry that showed up when Mom got to town.
I don't know where you're going with this.
You're acting like a phony and you know it, and it's bugging the hell out of me.
Look at yourself! Shawn, I order a braised quail salad and all of a sudden you think I'm putting on airs? Excuse me.
Who here has the guinea hen crostone with the liver pancetta? That'd be me.
Everybody here is ordering it.
Look, I'm I'm just gonna make this easier for both of us, okay? I know exactly what you're up to.
And I'm not gonna let it happen.
Let what happen, Shawn? Yeah, if you don't mind my saying so, you've been a real jerk to me all week.
I'm sorry I didn't tell you that your mother was coming back into town.
I'm sorry you think that I messed up your whole youth.
I'm sorry you think that I screwed up your life.
Get over it.
You had your chance.
Now, leave her alone.
Shawn Did you know that Ogletree raises carrier pigeons? Hello? Hello? That's strange.
Who called? Me.
You? Well, there it is again.
That's my number.
From work? No, from here.
The call is coming from inside the house.
Put it on speaker.
Hello? Who is this? Does this number have any other extensions? No.
Well, there's one, but it's not plugged in.
Where is it? I'll go check it out.
It's up in the attic.
The attic? I'll stay on the line.
You Good luck.
Come on.
Don't be mad.
You haunted my boss' house? It was the only way to show him how important and needed you are.
Look how brave you've been.
If we're being honest, I think this has been a real confidence booster for you, buddy.
Plus, once you solve the case, you're a hero, he never bothers you again.
Maybe you get a numbered space in the green lot.
Shawn, stop it.
How did you even Gus.
Friday, after you quit our business, I went to your office in hopes of haunting your Regional Sales Manager, Ogletree.
Unfortunately, he doesn't believe in ghosts, so I had to go a little higher on the rung.
Luckily for me, Katie from Accounts Receivable gave me a little tip about Haversham's wife.
I finally got to use my air conditioner and heating guy disguise.
I had an ultrasonic beeper in my pocket for the dog.
I actually thought you caught that one for a second.
Dude, hear me.
Hadewych! Don't ever, ever put dry ice in your mouth.
Doesn't matter how well you wrap it up.
Okay.
What about the old woman? Young woman.
She does Shakespeare in the Parking Lot down at the Albertsons by La Cumbre Plaza.
She was all stoked to finally have a paying gig.
And ditching the dress in the woods? That was just an improv because who knew Fearless Guster would come after her, you badass.
The rest of it was pretty simple, really.
I even visited Alice Bundy in prison to get a few pointers.
How do we solve it? Solve what? The ghost.
How do we solve a case where you're the culprit? That is a very good question.
I hadn't thought that far ahead.
You haven't thought that far ahead? Well, give me a second.
I'm hiding under the towel.
And then I realize, the towel is my life, and the pool is third grade, and the high dive is my father.
Wow! Oh, wow, I I poured out to you secrets even I didn't know I had.
That was amazing! I mean, so liberating to trust someone with your darkest innermost secrets.
Where have you been? Why haven't you been here before? I used to be here quite a bit.
I just recently came back.
I know someone here who works for the department occasionally.
Actually, he's my son.
Really? Well, you know, I know pretty much everybody who comes through the department.
What's his name? Shawn Spencer.
Ghost gone.
Just like that? Just like that.
It's split.
It's history.
Will not be bothering you again.
And that is a guarantee.
One hundred percent.
How can you guarantee? Please, don't ask.
Just enjoy.
And now, regarding our fee.
Of course, there will be no charge.
Knowing that you appreciate the work that Gus does for the community And for the company.
It's more than enough reward.
But if you were to insist on some sort of expense reimbursement, we, of course, would not accept.
Hmm.
Please, have a seat.
I have a bit of a sixth sense myself, Mr.
Guster.
Helps me out when a business deal is about to go south.
And it's bothering me right now.
I don't understand this guarantee, and I don't like it.
Last night, when that call came in, Guster, you went upstairs.
At the end of that call, I heard something that made me question all of this.
What was it? It was the voice.
Something was wrong with it.
What was wrong with it? It said "Gus.
" Gus? Just like that.
Well, sir, I am pretty sure that that can be easily explained.
Yes.
I'm sure that it can.
But there's something I really need for you to do for me right now.
Yes? Leave.
And, Mr.
Guster, I will carefully ponder my next move and your future with the company.
Let's talk, Burton.
Well, thank you for your time, Mr.
Haversham.
I'm sorry you don't believe me.
But I do understand.
Can we speak privately? Just one second.
What's your game? I have two games, Red Rover and lawn darts.
We'd need at least four for even the most rudimentary game of Rover, and they don't make lawn darts anymore.
Too dangerous.
But that's not why I'm here.
I sensed several things in that house that I couldn't tell you with other people in the room.
This is getting desperate, Mr.
Spencer, but, please, wow me.
You weren't raised by your father.
You were raised by your grandmother.
It was her ring.
Her ring that your wife wears now.
Okay, perhaps my father wasn't as present as I'd hoped and yes, my wife wears my grandmother's ring.
That doesn't mean anything.
Maybe not to you, but the sanctity of marriage means a lot to your grandmother, and having an affair with what? A secretary? That just feels wrong.
No matter how good her pappardelle is.
And just what the hell are you accusing me of? You're getting hot chocolate on the floor.
Is this Bianca's pappardelle? I hear voices.
Lady voices in the house.
No accusations here.
I'm just telling you your grandmother is very disappointed in you.
And she doesn't want you to go to jail.
Nothing you've accused me of is illegal.
He completely revamped our inventory system.
Repackaging samples and reselling them, while lucrative, is highly illegal.
So, what is this, now? A shakedown? There's no shakedown.
I'm just telling you what I know.
I'm a psychic, and with great power comes great responsibility.
And that responsibility, I share with Gus.
All we want is the opportunity to continue doing our work.
Just between us? I'm a psychic.
I can't lie.
Mr.
Guster, get back to work.
As per our conversation, your raise will be reflected in your next check.
I'm sorry, I'm confused.
Spend a little more time in your own business, Frankjim.
Excuse me.
I know about you, too.
His hair is horrible.
She who bore me.
What are you doing here, Goose? Finished working on my case, and I had this amazing idea that I would come by and scoop you up and take you to a movie, and it would just be us.
Actually, your dad was planning on coming by.
Of course, he was.
Okay, I'll go.
Wait.
Enough.
What happened? When? Between you two.
Mom, that is a veritable lifetime of conversations.
Follow me.
No, Mom! Mom, come on! Oh, God! Sit.
Are we really gonna do this? Sit down.
Okay.
What happened? Don't mince words.
With Dad? Mom, we were both there, you know, we don't need to revisit the past.
Maybe we do.
Well, I'm not sure I wanna forgive him for what happened.
The divorce? It wasn't what happened, Mom.
It was the way that it happened.
I mean, let's call it what it was.
He left us.
He left you.
He ended up with the house, and he left you by yourself to pick up the pieces.
That's not exactly what I call hero material, you know? Shawn, I left him.
Come on, Mom.
You don't have to spin this for me, okay? Let me be clear.
Your father was wonderful to me.
He wanted to keep going to counseling, he kept saying we could make it, but the writing was on the wall a long time.
You're losing me here, Mom.
What are you When I got that job, out of town, it was an incredible opportunity.
I was afraid I would never have a chance again, so I took it.
You were into your senior year.
Your path was set.
It seemed the right time, if such a thing is possible.
I thought, of all people, that you would be okay.
But I am so sorry.
Mom, you don't ever have to be sorry about anything.
Don't you spin this.
Sometimes, I get the worst realizations.
I know.
I know that I failed you, but I think that day, my life began again.
That sounds terrible, but don't you ever think I wanted to leave you.
In between the lines there's a lot of obscurity I'm not inclined to resign to maturity If it's all right then you're all wrong But why bounce around to the same damn song? You'd rather run when you can't crawl I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end I know, you know I know, you know