Psych s03e16 Episode Script
An Evening with Mr. Yang
Hey, can I get you guys anything else before I close this check out? As a matter of fact, you can.
My partner, Trapezius Milkington, would like to see something in a Belgian waffle.
Shawn, it's 12:30.
I do not want waffles or eggs or Malt-O-Meal.
All right.
What would you recommend? Oh, my gosh! If you're going to do this, I'm going to the bathroom.
Excuse me.
Don't mind him.
His bladder's probably smaller than yours.
Now go ahead, and take my taste buds on a fantastical journey.
I don't know I like the burgers.
Ah, ah, ah.
I'm sorry, I should have told you.
Only rule, it can't be something that someone would order for lunch.
Keep in mind, we want to go off script here.
Okay, I see.
Well, in that case I would recommend the pumpkin pancakes with a side of lingcod.
Does that work? Let's get married.
You don't even know me! Oh, really! Allow me to introduce yourself.
Jetta girl, maybe green.
Backseat loaded with empty Pinkberry cups.
Oh, my God! Wrong! I drive a Jeep.
A black Jeep.
But you're dead-on with the Pinkberry.
So what do you think? Should we set a date or what? Mmm, I'll think about it.
Fair enough.
Mmm-hmm.
Let me guess.
She's considering your proposal of marriage? How could you possibly know that? Shawn, you use that same tired-ass routine on every other waitress that serves us.
This is categorically untrue.
You used it on that 80-year-old fixings attendant at Fuddruckers.
What's your point, man? My point is, you're going to be 80 years old and still shamelessly hitting on waitresses.
Is that what you want? Is that a trick question? What do you think? All right, Hitch, you want me to take a chance? Huh? You want to see some Will Hunting action? Here we go.
Who are you calling? Juliet? That routine is as tired as the waitress bit.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.
Hello? Abigail Lytar? Judd Nelson.
Shawn, stop playing.
Is that really Abigail? Shawn, is that you? Of course it is.
Don't be ridiculous.
Look, clearly, we left some loose ends at our high school reunion, so I was thinking that maybe we should get together.
Why on earth would you think that's a good idea? Oh, I don't know, the last time I saw you, we kissed for like 27 seconds? Can I tell you something? Gord.
So just us, sitting at the same table? Hopefully a corner booth.
Abigail, what's happening here is, I'm asking you out on a proper date.
Shawn, are you sure? Are you sure about this? Yes, I believe I am.
Pick you up at 7:00.
I'll be the one flaring my nostrils uncontrollably.
Oh, God, no.
Done.
How do you like them apples? I sincerely hope you didn't just do that to prove a point.
She's a real person, Shawn.
That's no joke.
She misses me already.
Oh.
Chief! Get down here now.
I'm not asking.
That's weird.
We received the following letter about an hour ago.
It has been authenticated.
It's from the Yin-Yang killer.
Pay close attention.
"Hey, everybody, I'm back, for one night only.
"I'm going to kill someone tonight.
"Guess who? Guess where? Guess how? "This is going to be so much fun.
"Signed, Mr.
Yang.
" He's looking for a new challenger.
That's what he does.
Chief, I believe he's speaking to me.
Trust me, I'm ready.
Well, come on people.
He could be talking about anybody.
Look, just last week, Officer Jankowicz guessed my favorite variety of snack cracker.
Tuscan wheat, it's really obscure.
I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end What do we have on his description? We don't.
We've never had any age, ethnicity or physical description.
The harsh truth is that this is his game.
And we just have to play along with him.
That's a terrific plan.
Especially since it's worked out so well in the past.
Chief, the Mayor's on the phone.
Oh, here we go.
Detective Lassiter, introduce Shawn to our point person.
Spencer, listen up.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Getting I'm getting something already.
What? What is it? I can see the killer.
Already? Yes.
And I know exactly where he is.
Right there.
Come on, that's our guy.
Shawn.
Shawn, that is Mary Lightly, our profiler from the Serial Homicide and Abduction Task Force.
He is very familiar with the patterns of our killer.
And how to make an attractive lamp out of human skin.
Shawn, play nice.
He's a genius, and we need him.
Mary, this is Shawn Spencer, in the flesh.
See? He said "flesh.
" You know him? I've done my research, okay? Yeah, well, I've Googled myself, too, and there's a lot of stuff missing.
This is my partner, Sterling Cooper.
Hello.
So what's "Mary" short for? Marion? No.
Great, we're all good friends.
Care to shed a little light on this subject? Mr.
Yang is the most notorious killer this city has never seen.
He claimed six victims in the summer of 1995, and has resurfaced twice, claiming a single victim in each instance.
He only resurfaces when he feels there's a worthy opponent.
Now, his M.
O.
Is to challenge us with the opportunity to save the victims by solving his riddles.
Question, regarding the whole Mary thing.
My father's name was Mary.
His father before him was named Mary, and his father before him was named Craig.
Fair enough.
Proceed.
Yin-Yang.
The origin of this Chinese symbol is the unity of opposites.
Two opposing, and at the same time, complimentary aspects.
Dark versus light.
Killer versus cop.
Kramer versus Kramer.
Just show him the riddle.
"She serves the General well today "whose soldiers wait to die.
"In a white river they shall pay "for them she will not cry.
Who is she?" Now, this riddle came with this stopwatch already running.
One of his classic moves.
We've got one hour and ten minutes, people.
Generals and soldiers.
She'd be in the military.
McNab! Yes, sir! Damn it.
I want you to contact every military base in an 80-mile radius.
Find out if any female personnel have gone AWOL in the last 48 hours.
And bear in mind, it's the psychic that he wants to play with.
Each riddle will relate to him, personally.
Do you have any thoughts, Shawn? Yes, Jules, I do.
First of all, his rhyming skills are rudimentary at best.
"Today" and "pay"? "Die" and "cry"? Come on.
That's bush league.
It's bush, Lassy! Spencer, stop screwing around.
Get on with it.
I understand.
Yes.
Thank you, sir.
Karen, you're not going to use my son as a pawn.
Oh, I'll advise you to proceed with caution.
Need I remind you what happened to the last detective who went head-to-head with this sick bastard? He lost, and an innocent girl died.
Now, I will thank you to go home and let us do our work! Not going to happen.
Not going to happen! Henry! Your son is the only shot that we have.
Period.
Yeah, well, not my problem.
Thus far Shawn! Excuse me.
Hey, did I miss a memo? I thought Bring Your Daddy to Work Day was next week.
I forbid you to be a part of this, Shawn.
You're coming with me.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Forbid me? I'm familiar with your hands-on approach to parenting, but I'm not 27 anymore.
I can do whatever I want.
This guy knows about you, he knows about everybody you care about.
Think about that.
You don't catch this son of a bitch, kid, you're never going to sleep again.
Spencer, 55 minutes.
Go home, Dad.
I've got this.
Go home.
Sorry, guys.
My dad was just dropping off my Zodiac DVD.
Can we focus, please? "In a white river they shall pay.
" His seventh victim washed up on shore.
Maybe there's a No! There's never a repeat performance.
Okay? Each victim is a new masterpiece, and the first riddle is always a gimme.
This guy is itching to play the game.
Think about the last 24 hours.
Gus! Gus, I got it.
I mean, I know who the General is.
His name is Mills.
General Mills, the cereal manufacturer? Exactly! The white river is milk, and the soldiers are cereal.
So who is she? Hi, welcome to Captain Ron's.
Table for five? There was a waitress here earlier, long brown hair.
I haven't seen her in a while.
She must be on break.
Where? In the back, by the lockers.
How do you know this girl? We don't really know her.
She served us our lunch.
"Oh, rats, Shawn, so close.
Too bad she has to die.
"But how? And when? And where? Don't bother asking why.
" Well, he still owes us a riddle.
This is just the amuse-bouche.
He's taunting you.
I believe he's using the Alpha-Bits to send a message, that he, too, believes that breakfast for lunch is way underrated.
Would anyone like to try writing this message with a burrito? Open challenge.
Take a shot.
Exactly.
I rest my case.
And now I want a burrito.
Can I talk to you for a second, please? Dude, what are you doing? What are you talking about? A girl's life is at stake and you're acting like an ass? Making jokes? You haven't taken this thing seriously from jump street.
Exactly.
Exactly? Gus, I have to work like this, okay? That guy gets in my head, we lose.
I have to do my thing.
I cannot show weakness.
And my fanciful rhetoric helps defuse a situation that's very tense for the group.
But Shawn, nobody is laughing.
Trust me.
They're laughing on the inside.
That's how it works, buddy.
And I need you to help me out here.
Do you think you can do that? I'll try.
All right.
"Little League is over.
You just became a pro.
"Score a run, we'll have more fun.
"Make sure you beat the throw.
" Next location.
How much time do we have? Seventeen minutes.
Wow.
I want pancakes.
Who wants some pancakes? Whipped butter.
Maple syrup.
What? "Make sure you beat the throw" insinuates a close play.
You gotta touch home plate.
You gotta touch home plate to score a run.
That means the clue is back at the police station.
Hmm.
Mmm-hmm.
Make a hole! Mom? Hey, goose.
Hi, Mrs.
Spencer.
Hey.
Spencer! Let's go! We need to talk.
I'll make it quick.
Sure, no problem.
Find the clue.
I'll be right there! Bye.
Bye I'm not going to mince words.
Your father called me, he's worried about you.
He wants me to convince you not to do this.
So he calls you, you hop on a plane.
That's how it works, huh? No, Shawn, I didn't fly down here.
I was at a conference in Ventura.
You were in town? Would've been nice to know.
Truth is, I'm worried about you, too.
I did psych evals of several officers who were involved in this first round of this maniac's game.
It wasn't pretty.
All right, look, first of all, Mom, I have a date tonight.
All right? So I have to wrap this up at a reasonable hour.
And secondly, this guy has never gone up against me.
If I can stand here, and tell you that I will nail this guy, are you really going to tell me to walk away? Shawn! Mom! I can beat him.
I will beat him.
Okay, goose.
Nail the son of a bitch.
Yeah.
Okay, I've got to go, Mom.
Please be right.
Spencer! Conference room.
Thanks.
Well, someone must have signed for this.
It wasn't delivered.
Dobson found it outside the file room.
Well, how in the hell can Okay, you know what, people? Eyes open! Chief? Lou Sardocki from the Independent is on the phone.
He says you owe him a statement? Oh, I'll give him a statement.
That's pretty clever.
"Meet my little buddy Ben.
" "Pitter patter is your hint.
If you can't remember when, just read the fine print.
" And we have less than one hour.
Shawn, can you speak to it? No, he can't speak to it! Yes, he can.
Just give him some room.
Back up.
Fine, knock yourself out, Doctor Dolittle.
"Doctor Dolittle"? I know you can do better than that, Lassy.
I know you can.
I don't I don't know what I'm supposed to remember.
Hey, everybody.
Guess who I am? Hee, hee I'm Michael Jackson.
King of pop.
Shawn, I don't think this is working.
Are you kidding me? That was a home run.
Keep up the good work.
"Pitter patter" is the hint.
Now, I don't think we're speaking to a mouse.
I think the mouse is speaking to you.
What do you got, Shawn? "Fine print.
" Hello, my friend.
It's the fine print.
He was walking on it.
Dude, this is crazy! "Adam Hornstock selling black snake.
Will go fast.
" "Mira Gaffney seeks Bruton Gaster to love her tender.
" All people from past cases.
How do you know that? I told you, I did my research.
And finding Bouchard's treasure was extremely impressive.
Thank you, Willard.
My pleasure.
"Snarky psychic seeks ferroequinologist to help with killer smile.
" He's calling me snarky? "Ferroequinologist"? A ferroequinologist is a train enthusiast.
How do you know that? Because I am a ferroequinologist.
I too, am a ferroequinologist.
"Love her tender.
" The tender is a small fuel car right behind the locomotive.
And "black snake" is slang for coal train.
There's only one coal train that runs through Santa Barbara.
Thank God.
The train's right on time.
That is outstanding.
It's not going to stop.
What? It's not going to stop.
This is just a pull-through station.
What the hell are we doing here? Come on! What the Where the hell are you going? Come on, Gus.
This is our fantasy, man! It's like we're hobos.
I don't have a hobo fantasy, Shawn.
Abigail, you called me back! Yes, you left me very specific instructions in your message to do so.
Is this a bad time? No, I can talk! Look, we're still totally on for tonight.
I might just have to push the time a little bit.
Uh-huh.
Let me guess, you're chasing a serial killer or something.
Holy crap, yes! Yes, that's exactly what I'm doing! How did I cannot believe that you are bailing on me again! Hold on! Tell Abigail what we're doing! Hello, Abigail! It's Gus! We're chasing a train like hobos! What? She wants to talk with you.
First of all, his out-of-breath voice is terrible.
He was bad in Othello senior year, he's bad now.
Look, I'm just flashing back to high school, and I have this image of me standing alone on a pier looking like an idiot.
Look, I swear I'm telling the truth! I'm going to have to call you back! By the way, you were beautiful on that pier! Ah! "A moving picture is worth a thousand words, "so read the story and follow the birds.
"P.
S.
Once you're there you'll hear a phone.
"You have eight rings to pick up, "or the girl is dead.
"Shame on me, that didn't even rhyme.
" We have 27 minutes to solve this.
Okay.
Here.
This is, uh Okay What do you see? Nothing.
I don't see anything.
Not yet.
Oh, wait, I do see something.
What? What is it? I think you're going to want to see this.
It's pretty good.
Let me on.
Mary, I'm surprised it took you so long.
You seemed to spry.
Ankle weights.
I always wear them.
Even when I sleep.
I read about it in Men's Fitness.
Totally reinvigorated Ryan Reynolds' career.
So what's the riddle? How can I help? "A moving A moving picture.
"A moving picture is worth a thousand words.
" You've got to be kidding me.
You've got to be kidding me! I got it! I solved it! Let's go! That's it! That's it! That's it! That's it! "Follow the birds.
" There.
That's five rings, Shawn! Answer it! Shawn, what are you doing? No, don't you see? It didn't start ringing until we were three feet away.
Answer the phone, Spencer! He's watching us right now from somewhere! Answer the phone, Shawn! If that girl dies, you're an accessory to murder.
Shawn, I hope to God you know what you're doing.
Unbelievable.
He's been here.
He was here watching us the whole time! Don't touch anything.
Let's get CSI down here to dust for prints.
There's no need.
I'm sure he touched things.
He probably touched everything, but you're not going to find any prints.
He's too good for that.
What is this sick, twisted admiration you have for this whack job? Now do you get how good he is? This puppy's just warming up.
Hey everybody, check it out.
Look how big I am compared to this plane.
I'm King Kong.
Guster, what the hell is going on with you? Seriously, man, I need you to pull yourself together.
Oh, my God.
Let me see that.
I got it! It's a message.
He says, "You are a naughty, naughty boy.
" He's giving us another chance.
She's still alive.
Let's go back to the station, wait for instructions.
Forget that.
I'm I'm not going.
What do you mean? I'm nobody's puppet, okay? I'm done.
I'm done playing his little game.
I solved his puzzles.
I talked to a rat.
I even chased a train.
I'm finished.
No one's ever gotten this far.
That's why he's still playing.
It's a sign of respect.
No.
It isn't, Mary.
You said it, man, with your fey name and your weird Ken Burns haircut.
He's too good! Isn't that right? He's better than me! We never had a chance! He's going to kill that girl either way! Maybe, maybe not, Shawn, but I know this, you don't just give up.
Tell you what, Jules, uh, the next time a serial killer calls you out, personally, you can pick up your little pompoms and you can rally the troops and never say die.
I'm out.
Now, get out.
All three of you.
I can't believe I'm hearing this.
Should I say it again? You know what? Screw you, Spencer.
We don't need you! We don't need him, O'Hara.
We will find this sicko on our own.
Come on! We're running out of time.
Look, Shawn, I know you're upset, but if we give up now Gus, don't be The Last of the Famous International Playboys.
We're not giving up, okay? Far from it.
The only chance we have to win the game at this point is to change the rules, okay? I took a risk out there because I knew he wouldn't kill her.
I knew he wouldn't kill her because he loves the game too much, but that bought us time.
It bought us time to work by ourselves.
Okay? We're going to We're going to drop off his radar.
We're still going to find the girl.
We're going to do it on our own.
That's our move.
All right, but where do we start? We go back to the beginning.
Back to the beginning, and we trace the steps of Mr.
Yang.
All right.
You like what I did with the King Kong? You're on fire.
You're even using props.
Just got this fax.
Traced it to a bogus 800 number.
"I'm no Doubting Thomas.
I pucker up to fights.
"Were you to shake my hand, you'd have to use your right.
Who am I?" Well, if Yang was watching, he couldn't know if Spencer flew the coop.
This could be directed at any one of us.
Probably not this guy.
It's me.
It's directed at me.
He must know I'm a Civil War buff.
Thomas "Stonewall" Jackson was shot and killed by his own troops at the Battle of Chancellorsville.
He was known for sucking on lemons, even during combat.
And while he is buried in Lexington, Virginia, his left arm is buried separately near the battlefield.
Hey, you guys remember that Pat Swayze miniseries, North and South? Talk about Civil War buff, huh? Oh, my God! The Stonewall Hotel and Suites! Probably room 1863! We've got to get down there.
And you can count me in for next year's reenactment, partner.
Copy that.
Get my jacket.
Look, call me back, okay? We're still on for tonight.
Gus and I are making some serious progress here.
Call me back! Straight to voicemail.
That's not a good sign.
Wrong! I drive a Jeep.
A black Jeep.
Gus, there's no Jeep.
I think he drove away in her car.
We find the car, we may find the girl.
Lassiter, hold on.
Find the girl's car.
It's a black Jeep.
We already did.
You got to get down here.
Where are you? SBPD! Room's clear! Clear! She's breathing.
I'll get the paramedics.
What is this? "Shawn no longer wants to play.
"Stakes too low to make you stay"? He's He's got her, Gus.
He's got my mom.
Okay, I sent a couple of officers over to Abigail Lytar's apartment, and she's fine.
But I'm posting them on a watch until we can figure out what is going on.
Spencer, you need to get in here.
"You should be moving, as most people do, "but instead you sit and enjoy the view.
"P.
S.
Mommy says, 'Hi' and 'Bye'.
Just in case.
" "VU.
" Why did he spell it that way? Maybe that's the hint.
Or maybe he ran out of lipstick.
Brendan Vu.
From the spelling bee.
Good guess, but it's a misdirect.
I know exactly what he wants me to watch.
You do? This is like a needle in a haystack made completely out of needles.
Looks like we're at the end game.
All right, we know he used the waitress's car, so there's a good chance It's definitely a chance.
What kind of car does your wife drive? She rents when she's down here.
Do you know what company she rents from? That could narrow it down to a few models.
It's blue.
It's blue, Gus.
We're looking for a blue car.
It's a sedan.
People, we're looking for a blue car! A sedan! Go, go, go! All right, split up.
Squad, cover the exits! West side! West side! Roger that.
Hey, man! Watch where you're going! Hey! Get off! Get off the car! Get off my car, man! Hey, Ma.
Shawn! Shawn! Shh, shh! Dad, get down, get down.
Oh, jeez.
Mom.
I'm going to take this off, okay? Mmm.
It's okay.
It's just a decoy.
I know.
I see that.
He's fine.
He's breathing.
Yang must have knocked him out.
SWAT, call for a medic! Yes, ma'am.
Oh, my God.
Dad, she's strapped.
Oh, God, no.
Mom, where is he? Maddie.
Henry? Yeah, it's me, sweetheart.
I'm right here.
I'm not going anywhere.
All right, then I won't, either.
Besides, I don't really have anything better to do right now.
It's just a pen.
It's just a pen! What does this mean, Mary? Tell us! I don't know.
This feels more like improvisation.
This isn't his game.
We got here in time.
Maybe we won.
No, he's definitely going to kill her dead.
I just don't know how.
He's been one step ahead this whole time.
Where's Shawn? Hopefully one step ahead of us.
Okay.
All right, be honest with me.
You're surprised, right? I'm prettier than you thought I'd be.
It's the bone structure.
I won.
I beat you.
That was the deal.
Let my mom go.
You are just amazing.
Just my most, most admirable foe.
But then, see, I knew you would be.
That's why I chose you.
Because I'm I'm your yin.
Well, that's sweet.
Thank you for that.
But you're completely surrounded.
There's no way out of this for you.
Hey, you know what I love about this movie, Shawn? Its great resolution.
Okay, so call me old-fashioned, but really, is there anything more satisfying than a solid ending? You call me a killer, but the truth is, I complete things.
And that is what people really want, to feel complete.
That, and a corner booth.
And now, our story, that we created so beautifully together, is going to end.
But how? Do you want to know what it is? Or do you want to be surprised? Let's dial up! Move in slow.
Stand down! Stand down! Stand down.
Stand down.
Move them back.
Let's go! Let me guess.
You want to die, right? That's the perfect resolution? Gee, that's original.
You're a cliché.
You're a knockoff of a knockoff.
I could have killed your mom hours ago, Shawn.
This switch has such a light touch, like pinching a baby's cheek.
And then, boom! She blows up.
How much fun would that be to see? Oh, it gives me shivers, I want to do that so badly! But then, you wouldn't like me, Shawn.
And I want you to like me.
Oh, God, I'm so torn.
I need you to like me, because we're going to be working together again.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
You're going to rot in a cell with four padded walls.
The end.
No.
The end of the beginning.
I'm going to write a book.
Our story.
It's going to be epic.
A bestseller.
And guess what? I want you to write the forward.
Pass.
Okay.
But think about it on your date tonight.
Clear! Take the subject! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Let's go.
Okay.
All right, you're okay.
You're okay.
All right.
Think about it on your date tonight.
She was there.
Gus, she was there the whole time.
You got her, Shawn.
End of story.
Congratulations, Spencer.
Don't be too excited there, Mary.
It's not like we just apprehended Santa Barbara's most notorious killer or anything.
You're right, Gus.
I'm sorry to fly off the handle.
I've spent the last 13 years of my life with this person.
I have to find a new hobby.
Two words.
Racquetball.
That could work.
Thanks for your help, man.
I needed it.
Gus, you play racquetball? Goodbye, Mary.
Until next time.
Okay.
Okay.
There we go.
Better? Henry, I told him to go for it.
That doesn't matter.
What matters is that you're both okay.
You two are the most important people in the world to me, you know.
I do know.
Mom! Let's get you out of here.
What do you need? What can I do? Let's see.
You already got me kidnapped by a raging sociopath Right.
Check.
What else? Nothing! Nothing, goose.
I'm really fine.
Your father's been taking very good care of me.
Well, be good.
Yep.
If I'm not mistaken, you have a very important date tonight.
Oh, Mom, please, I can reschedule.
No, you won't! I'm fine! The crazy bitch snuck up from behind me with chloroform.
Life is more than catching bad guys.
You did a good deed today.
Now it's time to go see about a girl.
It's time to go see about a How you like them apples? Well played, Mom.
All right.
Hey.
Shawn, did you really just catch Mr.
Yang? Yes, I did.
And he turned out to be a she.
Curious.
Yeah.
Hey, I'm sorry I didn't believe you earlier.
I just, uh, really didn't.
Half-apology accepted.
Uh, I cut a deal with the theater manager, so this is still happening in a big, big way.
How do you feel about popped corn? I like it.
I like it very much.
Jules! What are you doing here? What I mean is, you know, who's going to fit Mr.
Yang with her straightjacket and iron mask with face grill? Something tells me there's an entire precinct of officers bidding on that job right now.
Uh, can I interest you in a Necco Wafer? Shawn, can you just not talk for a few seconds? Look, I just wanted to tell you that what you did today I mean, I can't imagine being able to function at that level while your mom was You know.
I am, uh, clearly not as good with words as you are, and I know that things between us have been a little complicated, and that there have probably been some mixed signals, mostly from me, with regards to the time that we spend together outside of the line of duty.
Look, Jules Shh! Please, just let me finish stumbling through this.
I'm almost done.
I promise.
What I'm saying is that I think, maybe, the best things, the richest things, aren't supposed to come easily, and that sometimes the moments that make the most sense happen when everything else doesn't, and, well, I think you deserve more than popcorn tonight.
So why don't you let me take you to dinner? Detective O'Hara, are you asking me out on a date? I am.
A proper one.
Wow.
I cannot believe this.
All this time, and Your timing is just awful.
It is? Yeah, just dreadful.
What? I can't go to dinner with you, Jules.
I'm already on a date.
You are? What, here? Yeah.
Right now.
It's It's weird, it's a little weird, but, uh Yeah.
With Abigail.
The one that got away.
Yeah.
Get out there.
She's not going to wait forever.
Jules? I am so sorry for snapping at you earlier.
I know.
You all right? Yeah.
Why would you even ask that? Mostly because you look like you got punched in the stomach and stopped breathing for a few seconds.
Wow.
I didn't realize I was that transparent.
The truth The truth is, Abigail, everything is not okay.
And I don't know exactly how to say this.
Try using words to form a sentence.
I'm so, so sorry, Abigail.
They're all out of butter.
Wait, what? I know.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I don't know why I'm apologizing, 'cause it's not my fault, really, but I mean, it's opening night, and how do you run out of butter? That's cardinal.
That's cardinal.
What are we going to do? I don't know exactly.
Uh, as you can see, the kernels are fluffy, and salted quite nicely.
I tried I tried one.
But we do have Necco Wafers.
Necco? And Toblerone.
I love Toblerone.
Yes, I sensed that you might.
It's like a more sophisticated Krackle.
Yeah! Hey, you're sure about this? Absolutely.
Now, in with you into this carriage.
Okey-doke.
That's what I'm talking about.
Gus.
Hello, Abigail.
The thing is, it's his car.
It's a company car, and he's very protective of it.
So just pretend like he isn't here.
Are those Necco Wafers up there? Yes, they are.
Pass them back please.
In between the lines there's a lot of obscurity I'm not inclined to resign to maturity If it's all right then you're all wrong But why bounce around to the same damn song? You'd rather run when you can't crawl I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end I know, you know I know, you know
My partner, Trapezius Milkington, would like to see something in a Belgian waffle.
Shawn, it's 12:30.
I do not want waffles or eggs or Malt-O-Meal.
All right.
What would you recommend? Oh, my gosh! If you're going to do this, I'm going to the bathroom.
Excuse me.
Don't mind him.
His bladder's probably smaller than yours.
Now go ahead, and take my taste buds on a fantastical journey.
I don't know I like the burgers.
Ah, ah, ah.
I'm sorry, I should have told you.
Only rule, it can't be something that someone would order for lunch.
Keep in mind, we want to go off script here.
Okay, I see.
Well, in that case I would recommend the pumpkin pancakes with a side of lingcod.
Does that work? Let's get married.
You don't even know me! Oh, really! Allow me to introduce yourself.
Jetta girl, maybe green.
Backseat loaded with empty Pinkberry cups.
Oh, my God! Wrong! I drive a Jeep.
A black Jeep.
But you're dead-on with the Pinkberry.
So what do you think? Should we set a date or what? Mmm, I'll think about it.
Fair enough.
Mmm-hmm.
Let me guess.
She's considering your proposal of marriage? How could you possibly know that? Shawn, you use that same tired-ass routine on every other waitress that serves us.
This is categorically untrue.
You used it on that 80-year-old fixings attendant at Fuddruckers.
What's your point, man? My point is, you're going to be 80 years old and still shamelessly hitting on waitresses.
Is that what you want? Is that a trick question? What do you think? All right, Hitch, you want me to take a chance? Huh? You want to see some Will Hunting action? Here we go.
Who are you calling? Juliet? That routine is as tired as the waitress bit.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.
Hello? Abigail Lytar? Judd Nelson.
Shawn, stop playing.
Is that really Abigail? Shawn, is that you? Of course it is.
Don't be ridiculous.
Look, clearly, we left some loose ends at our high school reunion, so I was thinking that maybe we should get together.
Why on earth would you think that's a good idea? Oh, I don't know, the last time I saw you, we kissed for like 27 seconds? Can I tell you something? Gord.
So just us, sitting at the same table? Hopefully a corner booth.
Abigail, what's happening here is, I'm asking you out on a proper date.
Shawn, are you sure? Are you sure about this? Yes, I believe I am.
Pick you up at 7:00.
I'll be the one flaring my nostrils uncontrollably.
Oh, God, no.
Done.
How do you like them apples? I sincerely hope you didn't just do that to prove a point.
She's a real person, Shawn.
That's no joke.
She misses me already.
Oh.
Chief! Get down here now.
I'm not asking.
That's weird.
We received the following letter about an hour ago.
It has been authenticated.
It's from the Yin-Yang killer.
Pay close attention.
"Hey, everybody, I'm back, for one night only.
"I'm going to kill someone tonight.
"Guess who? Guess where? Guess how? "This is going to be so much fun.
"Signed, Mr.
Yang.
" He's looking for a new challenger.
That's what he does.
Chief, I believe he's speaking to me.
Trust me, I'm ready.
Well, come on people.
He could be talking about anybody.
Look, just last week, Officer Jankowicz guessed my favorite variety of snack cracker.
Tuscan wheat, it's really obscure.
I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end What do we have on his description? We don't.
We've never had any age, ethnicity or physical description.
The harsh truth is that this is his game.
And we just have to play along with him.
That's a terrific plan.
Especially since it's worked out so well in the past.
Chief, the Mayor's on the phone.
Oh, here we go.
Detective Lassiter, introduce Shawn to our point person.
Spencer, listen up.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Getting I'm getting something already.
What? What is it? I can see the killer.
Already? Yes.
And I know exactly where he is.
Right there.
Come on, that's our guy.
Shawn.
Shawn, that is Mary Lightly, our profiler from the Serial Homicide and Abduction Task Force.
He is very familiar with the patterns of our killer.
And how to make an attractive lamp out of human skin.
Shawn, play nice.
He's a genius, and we need him.
Mary, this is Shawn Spencer, in the flesh.
See? He said "flesh.
" You know him? I've done my research, okay? Yeah, well, I've Googled myself, too, and there's a lot of stuff missing.
This is my partner, Sterling Cooper.
Hello.
So what's "Mary" short for? Marion? No.
Great, we're all good friends.
Care to shed a little light on this subject? Mr.
Yang is the most notorious killer this city has never seen.
He claimed six victims in the summer of 1995, and has resurfaced twice, claiming a single victim in each instance.
He only resurfaces when he feels there's a worthy opponent.
Now, his M.
O.
Is to challenge us with the opportunity to save the victims by solving his riddles.
Question, regarding the whole Mary thing.
My father's name was Mary.
His father before him was named Mary, and his father before him was named Craig.
Fair enough.
Proceed.
Yin-Yang.
The origin of this Chinese symbol is the unity of opposites.
Two opposing, and at the same time, complimentary aspects.
Dark versus light.
Killer versus cop.
Kramer versus Kramer.
Just show him the riddle.
"She serves the General well today "whose soldiers wait to die.
"In a white river they shall pay "for them she will not cry.
Who is she?" Now, this riddle came with this stopwatch already running.
One of his classic moves.
We've got one hour and ten minutes, people.
Generals and soldiers.
She'd be in the military.
McNab! Yes, sir! Damn it.
I want you to contact every military base in an 80-mile radius.
Find out if any female personnel have gone AWOL in the last 48 hours.
And bear in mind, it's the psychic that he wants to play with.
Each riddle will relate to him, personally.
Do you have any thoughts, Shawn? Yes, Jules, I do.
First of all, his rhyming skills are rudimentary at best.
"Today" and "pay"? "Die" and "cry"? Come on.
That's bush league.
It's bush, Lassy! Spencer, stop screwing around.
Get on with it.
I understand.
Yes.
Thank you, sir.
Karen, you're not going to use my son as a pawn.
Oh, I'll advise you to proceed with caution.
Need I remind you what happened to the last detective who went head-to-head with this sick bastard? He lost, and an innocent girl died.
Now, I will thank you to go home and let us do our work! Not going to happen.
Not going to happen! Henry! Your son is the only shot that we have.
Period.
Yeah, well, not my problem.
Thus far Shawn! Excuse me.
Hey, did I miss a memo? I thought Bring Your Daddy to Work Day was next week.
I forbid you to be a part of this, Shawn.
You're coming with me.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Forbid me? I'm familiar with your hands-on approach to parenting, but I'm not 27 anymore.
I can do whatever I want.
This guy knows about you, he knows about everybody you care about.
Think about that.
You don't catch this son of a bitch, kid, you're never going to sleep again.
Spencer, 55 minutes.
Go home, Dad.
I've got this.
Go home.
Sorry, guys.
My dad was just dropping off my Zodiac DVD.
Can we focus, please? "In a white river they shall pay.
" His seventh victim washed up on shore.
Maybe there's a No! There's never a repeat performance.
Okay? Each victim is a new masterpiece, and the first riddle is always a gimme.
This guy is itching to play the game.
Think about the last 24 hours.
Gus! Gus, I got it.
I mean, I know who the General is.
His name is Mills.
General Mills, the cereal manufacturer? Exactly! The white river is milk, and the soldiers are cereal.
So who is she? Hi, welcome to Captain Ron's.
Table for five? There was a waitress here earlier, long brown hair.
I haven't seen her in a while.
She must be on break.
Where? In the back, by the lockers.
How do you know this girl? We don't really know her.
She served us our lunch.
"Oh, rats, Shawn, so close.
Too bad she has to die.
"But how? And when? And where? Don't bother asking why.
" Well, he still owes us a riddle.
This is just the amuse-bouche.
He's taunting you.
I believe he's using the Alpha-Bits to send a message, that he, too, believes that breakfast for lunch is way underrated.
Would anyone like to try writing this message with a burrito? Open challenge.
Take a shot.
Exactly.
I rest my case.
And now I want a burrito.
Can I talk to you for a second, please? Dude, what are you doing? What are you talking about? A girl's life is at stake and you're acting like an ass? Making jokes? You haven't taken this thing seriously from jump street.
Exactly.
Exactly? Gus, I have to work like this, okay? That guy gets in my head, we lose.
I have to do my thing.
I cannot show weakness.
And my fanciful rhetoric helps defuse a situation that's very tense for the group.
But Shawn, nobody is laughing.
Trust me.
They're laughing on the inside.
That's how it works, buddy.
And I need you to help me out here.
Do you think you can do that? I'll try.
All right.
"Little League is over.
You just became a pro.
"Score a run, we'll have more fun.
"Make sure you beat the throw.
" Next location.
How much time do we have? Seventeen minutes.
Wow.
I want pancakes.
Who wants some pancakes? Whipped butter.
Maple syrup.
What? "Make sure you beat the throw" insinuates a close play.
You gotta touch home plate.
You gotta touch home plate to score a run.
That means the clue is back at the police station.
Hmm.
Mmm-hmm.
Make a hole! Mom? Hey, goose.
Hi, Mrs.
Spencer.
Hey.
Spencer! Let's go! We need to talk.
I'll make it quick.
Sure, no problem.
Find the clue.
I'll be right there! Bye.
Bye I'm not going to mince words.
Your father called me, he's worried about you.
He wants me to convince you not to do this.
So he calls you, you hop on a plane.
That's how it works, huh? No, Shawn, I didn't fly down here.
I was at a conference in Ventura.
You were in town? Would've been nice to know.
Truth is, I'm worried about you, too.
I did psych evals of several officers who were involved in this first round of this maniac's game.
It wasn't pretty.
All right, look, first of all, Mom, I have a date tonight.
All right? So I have to wrap this up at a reasonable hour.
And secondly, this guy has never gone up against me.
If I can stand here, and tell you that I will nail this guy, are you really going to tell me to walk away? Shawn! Mom! I can beat him.
I will beat him.
Okay, goose.
Nail the son of a bitch.
Yeah.
Okay, I've got to go, Mom.
Please be right.
Spencer! Conference room.
Thanks.
Well, someone must have signed for this.
It wasn't delivered.
Dobson found it outside the file room.
Well, how in the hell can Okay, you know what, people? Eyes open! Chief? Lou Sardocki from the Independent is on the phone.
He says you owe him a statement? Oh, I'll give him a statement.
That's pretty clever.
"Meet my little buddy Ben.
" "Pitter patter is your hint.
If you can't remember when, just read the fine print.
" And we have less than one hour.
Shawn, can you speak to it? No, he can't speak to it! Yes, he can.
Just give him some room.
Back up.
Fine, knock yourself out, Doctor Dolittle.
"Doctor Dolittle"? I know you can do better than that, Lassy.
I know you can.
I don't I don't know what I'm supposed to remember.
Hey, everybody.
Guess who I am? Hee, hee I'm Michael Jackson.
King of pop.
Shawn, I don't think this is working.
Are you kidding me? That was a home run.
Keep up the good work.
"Pitter patter" is the hint.
Now, I don't think we're speaking to a mouse.
I think the mouse is speaking to you.
What do you got, Shawn? "Fine print.
" Hello, my friend.
It's the fine print.
He was walking on it.
Dude, this is crazy! "Adam Hornstock selling black snake.
Will go fast.
" "Mira Gaffney seeks Bruton Gaster to love her tender.
" All people from past cases.
How do you know that? I told you, I did my research.
And finding Bouchard's treasure was extremely impressive.
Thank you, Willard.
My pleasure.
"Snarky psychic seeks ferroequinologist to help with killer smile.
" He's calling me snarky? "Ferroequinologist"? A ferroequinologist is a train enthusiast.
How do you know that? Because I am a ferroequinologist.
I too, am a ferroequinologist.
"Love her tender.
" The tender is a small fuel car right behind the locomotive.
And "black snake" is slang for coal train.
There's only one coal train that runs through Santa Barbara.
Thank God.
The train's right on time.
That is outstanding.
It's not going to stop.
What? It's not going to stop.
This is just a pull-through station.
What the hell are we doing here? Come on! What the Where the hell are you going? Come on, Gus.
This is our fantasy, man! It's like we're hobos.
I don't have a hobo fantasy, Shawn.
Abigail, you called me back! Yes, you left me very specific instructions in your message to do so.
Is this a bad time? No, I can talk! Look, we're still totally on for tonight.
I might just have to push the time a little bit.
Uh-huh.
Let me guess, you're chasing a serial killer or something.
Holy crap, yes! Yes, that's exactly what I'm doing! How did I cannot believe that you are bailing on me again! Hold on! Tell Abigail what we're doing! Hello, Abigail! It's Gus! We're chasing a train like hobos! What? She wants to talk with you.
First of all, his out-of-breath voice is terrible.
He was bad in Othello senior year, he's bad now.
Look, I'm just flashing back to high school, and I have this image of me standing alone on a pier looking like an idiot.
Look, I swear I'm telling the truth! I'm going to have to call you back! By the way, you were beautiful on that pier! Ah! "A moving picture is worth a thousand words, "so read the story and follow the birds.
"P.
S.
Once you're there you'll hear a phone.
"You have eight rings to pick up, "or the girl is dead.
"Shame on me, that didn't even rhyme.
" We have 27 minutes to solve this.
Okay.
Here.
This is, uh Okay What do you see? Nothing.
I don't see anything.
Not yet.
Oh, wait, I do see something.
What? What is it? I think you're going to want to see this.
It's pretty good.
Let me on.
Mary, I'm surprised it took you so long.
You seemed to spry.
Ankle weights.
I always wear them.
Even when I sleep.
I read about it in Men's Fitness.
Totally reinvigorated Ryan Reynolds' career.
So what's the riddle? How can I help? "A moving A moving picture.
"A moving picture is worth a thousand words.
" You've got to be kidding me.
You've got to be kidding me! I got it! I solved it! Let's go! That's it! That's it! That's it! That's it! "Follow the birds.
" There.
That's five rings, Shawn! Answer it! Shawn, what are you doing? No, don't you see? It didn't start ringing until we were three feet away.
Answer the phone, Spencer! He's watching us right now from somewhere! Answer the phone, Shawn! If that girl dies, you're an accessory to murder.
Shawn, I hope to God you know what you're doing.
Unbelievable.
He's been here.
He was here watching us the whole time! Don't touch anything.
Let's get CSI down here to dust for prints.
There's no need.
I'm sure he touched things.
He probably touched everything, but you're not going to find any prints.
He's too good for that.
What is this sick, twisted admiration you have for this whack job? Now do you get how good he is? This puppy's just warming up.
Hey everybody, check it out.
Look how big I am compared to this plane.
I'm King Kong.
Guster, what the hell is going on with you? Seriously, man, I need you to pull yourself together.
Oh, my God.
Let me see that.
I got it! It's a message.
He says, "You are a naughty, naughty boy.
" He's giving us another chance.
She's still alive.
Let's go back to the station, wait for instructions.
Forget that.
I'm I'm not going.
What do you mean? I'm nobody's puppet, okay? I'm done.
I'm done playing his little game.
I solved his puzzles.
I talked to a rat.
I even chased a train.
I'm finished.
No one's ever gotten this far.
That's why he's still playing.
It's a sign of respect.
No.
It isn't, Mary.
You said it, man, with your fey name and your weird Ken Burns haircut.
He's too good! Isn't that right? He's better than me! We never had a chance! He's going to kill that girl either way! Maybe, maybe not, Shawn, but I know this, you don't just give up.
Tell you what, Jules, uh, the next time a serial killer calls you out, personally, you can pick up your little pompoms and you can rally the troops and never say die.
I'm out.
Now, get out.
All three of you.
I can't believe I'm hearing this.
Should I say it again? You know what? Screw you, Spencer.
We don't need you! We don't need him, O'Hara.
We will find this sicko on our own.
Come on! We're running out of time.
Look, Shawn, I know you're upset, but if we give up now Gus, don't be The Last of the Famous International Playboys.
We're not giving up, okay? Far from it.
The only chance we have to win the game at this point is to change the rules, okay? I took a risk out there because I knew he wouldn't kill her.
I knew he wouldn't kill her because he loves the game too much, but that bought us time.
It bought us time to work by ourselves.
Okay? We're going to We're going to drop off his radar.
We're still going to find the girl.
We're going to do it on our own.
That's our move.
All right, but where do we start? We go back to the beginning.
Back to the beginning, and we trace the steps of Mr.
Yang.
All right.
You like what I did with the King Kong? You're on fire.
You're even using props.
Just got this fax.
Traced it to a bogus 800 number.
"I'm no Doubting Thomas.
I pucker up to fights.
"Were you to shake my hand, you'd have to use your right.
Who am I?" Well, if Yang was watching, he couldn't know if Spencer flew the coop.
This could be directed at any one of us.
Probably not this guy.
It's me.
It's directed at me.
He must know I'm a Civil War buff.
Thomas "Stonewall" Jackson was shot and killed by his own troops at the Battle of Chancellorsville.
He was known for sucking on lemons, even during combat.
And while he is buried in Lexington, Virginia, his left arm is buried separately near the battlefield.
Hey, you guys remember that Pat Swayze miniseries, North and South? Talk about Civil War buff, huh? Oh, my God! The Stonewall Hotel and Suites! Probably room 1863! We've got to get down there.
And you can count me in for next year's reenactment, partner.
Copy that.
Get my jacket.
Look, call me back, okay? We're still on for tonight.
Gus and I are making some serious progress here.
Call me back! Straight to voicemail.
That's not a good sign.
Wrong! I drive a Jeep.
A black Jeep.
Gus, there's no Jeep.
I think he drove away in her car.
We find the car, we may find the girl.
Lassiter, hold on.
Find the girl's car.
It's a black Jeep.
We already did.
You got to get down here.
Where are you? SBPD! Room's clear! Clear! She's breathing.
I'll get the paramedics.
What is this? "Shawn no longer wants to play.
"Stakes too low to make you stay"? He's He's got her, Gus.
He's got my mom.
Okay, I sent a couple of officers over to Abigail Lytar's apartment, and she's fine.
But I'm posting them on a watch until we can figure out what is going on.
Spencer, you need to get in here.
"You should be moving, as most people do, "but instead you sit and enjoy the view.
"P.
S.
Mommy says, 'Hi' and 'Bye'.
Just in case.
" "VU.
" Why did he spell it that way? Maybe that's the hint.
Or maybe he ran out of lipstick.
Brendan Vu.
From the spelling bee.
Good guess, but it's a misdirect.
I know exactly what he wants me to watch.
You do? This is like a needle in a haystack made completely out of needles.
Looks like we're at the end game.
All right, we know he used the waitress's car, so there's a good chance It's definitely a chance.
What kind of car does your wife drive? She rents when she's down here.
Do you know what company she rents from? That could narrow it down to a few models.
It's blue.
It's blue, Gus.
We're looking for a blue car.
It's a sedan.
People, we're looking for a blue car! A sedan! Go, go, go! All right, split up.
Squad, cover the exits! West side! West side! Roger that.
Hey, man! Watch where you're going! Hey! Get off! Get off the car! Get off my car, man! Hey, Ma.
Shawn! Shawn! Shh, shh! Dad, get down, get down.
Oh, jeez.
Mom.
I'm going to take this off, okay? Mmm.
It's okay.
It's just a decoy.
I know.
I see that.
He's fine.
He's breathing.
Yang must have knocked him out.
SWAT, call for a medic! Yes, ma'am.
Oh, my God.
Dad, she's strapped.
Oh, God, no.
Mom, where is he? Maddie.
Henry? Yeah, it's me, sweetheart.
I'm right here.
I'm not going anywhere.
All right, then I won't, either.
Besides, I don't really have anything better to do right now.
It's just a pen.
It's just a pen! What does this mean, Mary? Tell us! I don't know.
This feels more like improvisation.
This isn't his game.
We got here in time.
Maybe we won.
No, he's definitely going to kill her dead.
I just don't know how.
He's been one step ahead this whole time.
Where's Shawn? Hopefully one step ahead of us.
Okay.
All right, be honest with me.
You're surprised, right? I'm prettier than you thought I'd be.
It's the bone structure.
I won.
I beat you.
That was the deal.
Let my mom go.
You are just amazing.
Just my most, most admirable foe.
But then, see, I knew you would be.
That's why I chose you.
Because I'm I'm your yin.
Well, that's sweet.
Thank you for that.
But you're completely surrounded.
There's no way out of this for you.
Hey, you know what I love about this movie, Shawn? Its great resolution.
Okay, so call me old-fashioned, but really, is there anything more satisfying than a solid ending? You call me a killer, but the truth is, I complete things.
And that is what people really want, to feel complete.
That, and a corner booth.
And now, our story, that we created so beautifully together, is going to end.
But how? Do you want to know what it is? Or do you want to be surprised? Let's dial up! Move in slow.
Stand down! Stand down! Stand down.
Stand down.
Move them back.
Let's go! Let me guess.
You want to die, right? That's the perfect resolution? Gee, that's original.
You're a cliché.
You're a knockoff of a knockoff.
I could have killed your mom hours ago, Shawn.
This switch has such a light touch, like pinching a baby's cheek.
And then, boom! She blows up.
How much fun would that be to see? Oh, it gives me shivers, I want to do that so badly! But then, you wouldn't like me, Shawn.
And I want you to like me.
Oh, God, I'm so torn.
I need you to like me, because we're going to be working together again.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
You're going to rot in a cell with four padded walls.
The end.
No.
The end of the beginning.
I'm going to write a book.
Our story.
It's going to be epic.
A bestseller.
And guess what? I want you to write the forward.
Pass.
Okay.
But think about it on your date tonight.
Clear! Take the subject! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Let's go.
Okay.
All right, you're okay.
You're okay.
All right.
Think about it on your date tonight.
She was there.
Gus, she was there the whole time.
You got her, Shawn.
End of story.
Congratulations, Spencer.
Don't be too excited there, Mary.
It's not like we just apprehended Santa Barbara's most notorious killer or anything.
You're right, Gus.
I'm sorry to fly off the handle.
I've spent the last 13 years of my life with this person.
I have to find a new hobby.
Two words.
Racquetball.
That could work.
Thanks for your help, man.
I needed it.
Gus, you play racquetball? Goodbye, Mary.
Until next time.
Okay.
Okay.
There we go.
Better? Henry, I told him to go for it.
That doesn't matter.
What matters is that you're both okay.
You two are the most important people in the world to me, you know.
I do know.
Mom! Let's get you out of here.
What do you need? What can I do? Let's see.
You already got me kidnapped by a raging sociopath Right.
Check.
What else? Nothing! Nothing, goose.
I'm really fine.
Your father's been taking very good care of me.
Well, be good.
Yep.
If I'm not mistaken, you have a very important date tonight.
Oh, Mom, please, I can reschedule.
No, you won't! I'm fine! The crazy bitch snuck up from behind me with chloroform.
Life is more than catching bad guys.
You did a good deed today.
Now it's time to go see about a girl.
It's time to go see about a How you like them apples? Well played, Mom.
All right.
Hey.
Shawn, did you really just catch Mr.
Yang? Yes, I did.
And he turned out to be a she.
Curious.
Yeah.
Hey, I'm sorry I didn't believe you earlier.
I just, uh, really didn't.
Half-apology accepted.
Uh, I cut a deal with the theater manager, so this is still happening in a big, big way.
How do you feel about popped corn? I like it.
I like it very much.
Jules! What are you doing here? What I mean is, you know, who's going to fit Mr.
Yang with her straightjacket and iron mask with face grill? Something tells me there's an entire precinct of officers bidding on that job right now.
Uh, can I interest you in a Necco Wafer? Shawn, can you just not talk for a few seconds? Look, I just wanted to tell you that what you did today I mean, I can't imagine being able to function at that level while your mom was You know.
I am, uh, clearly not as good with words as you are, and I know that things between us have been a little complicated, and that there have probably been some mixed signals, mostly from me, with regards to the time that we spend together outside of the line of duty.
Look, Jules Shh! Please, just let me finish stumbling through this.
I'm almost done.
I promise.
What I'm saying is that I think, maybe, the best things, the richest things, aren't supposed to come easily, and that sometimes the moments that make the most sense happen when everything else doesn't, and, well, I think you deserve more than popcorn tonight.
So why don't you let me take you to dinner? Detective O'Hara, are you asking me out on a date? I am.
A proper one.
Wow.
I cannot believe this.
All this time, and Your timing is just awful.
It is? Yeah, just dreadful.
What? I can't go to dinner with you, Jules.
I'm already on a date.
You are? What, here? Yeah.
Right now.
It's It's weird, it's a little weird, but, uh Yeah.
With Abigail.
The one that got away.
Yeah.
Get out there.
She's not going to wait forever.
Jules? I am so sorry for snapping at you earlier.
I know.
You all right? Yeah.
Why would you even ask that? Mostly because you look like you got punched in the stomach and stopped breathing for a few seconds.
Wow.
I didn't realize I was that transparent.
The truth The truth is, Abigail, everything is not okay.
And I don't know exactly how to say this.
Try using words to form a sentence.
I'm so, so sorry, Abigail.
They're all out of butter.
Wait, what? I know.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I don't know why I'm apologizing, 'cause it's not my fault, really, but I mean, it's opening night, and how do you run out of butter? That's cardinal.
That's cardinal.
What are we going to do? I don't know exactly.
Uh, as you can see, the kernels are fluffy, and salted quite nicely.
I tried I tried one.
But we do have Necco Wafers.
Necco? And Toblerone.
I love Toblerone.
Yes, I sensed that you might.
It's like a more sophisticated Krackle.
Yeah! Hey, you're sure about this? Absolutely.
Now, in with you into this carriage.
Okey-doke.
That's what I'm talking about.
Gus.
Hello, Abigail.
The thing is, it's his car.
It's a company car, and he's very protective of it.
So just pretend like he isn't here.
Are those Necco Wafers up there? Yes, they are.
Pass them back please.
In between the lines there's a lot of obscurity I'm not inclined to resign to maturity If it's all right then you're all wrong But why bounce around to the same damn song? You'd rather run when you can't crawl I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth I know, you know They just don't have any proof Embrace the deception Learn how to bend Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end I know, you know I know, you know