House, M.D. s06e06 Episode Script

Sure, let's give up now.
It's no big deal.
It's just Pharmacide, just their tour kick-off.
I mean, who cares if we miss the most insane party in the world? Come on, Phoeb.
Victory or death.
Or possibly cake.
Look, I'm sorry.
Sorry, your caffeine fix is on its way.
Will you hold on? Hi, we're the DJ's assistants.
Hold on.
No.
I said we both work for him.
You mean "her.
" The DJ is a she-jay.
It's okay, Dave, she's my plus one.
Make that plus two.
You weren't worried, were you? Yes.
And there will be punishment unless you tell us everything.
You've been here all night? After the party, we went up to the Presidential Suite with the band.
It was ginormous, like 10 rooms.
We had a few drinks and some weed, and played Drummer God on this giant plasma TV.
Which she rocked, by the way.
I think I hate you right now.
Colt took me up to the roof, but by then the gate to the pool was locked.
So no one was up there.
So we just climbed over and jumped down, and went skinny dipping.
Did you do it? No.
He was so sweet.
Later, he played his guitar and he wrote a song for me.
Oh, my God.
Jord, what happened to your foot? Maybe you twisted your ankle when you jumped.
Or it could be your allergies.
My aunt was allergic to some cold medication, and her hands swelled up like the Marshmallow Man's.
Jord, are you okay? Jordan! Foreman expects me to read an x-ray on this itty-bitty screen.
He should have e-mailed me a larger phone.
Why are you packing? We're leaving this afternoon for the conference on pharmacology and public policy.
We? We discussed this.
It's been on your calendar for weeks.
So has Ramadan.
Think of it as a vacation.
Nice, healthy Adirondack air.
Or not, I don't care.
You're coming with.
You should come with me.
State Pillow-Fighting Championships.
Dollar beers, wet t-shirts.
In the words of the philosopher Eddie Money, "I've got two tickets to paradise.
" House, when you moved in, I promised your therapist I'd be here for you.
I can't be here if I'm there, unless you're there, too.
So it's not a discussion.
Fine.
I'll let Foreman know that the 16-year-old patient with the severe edema can wait.
Relax, I got no idea what's wrong with her, so odds are not fatal.
Still not going.
She's got rhabdo.
Who wants to come to the Pillow-Fighting Championships? Rutgers has got a great team this year.
So glad their anchor didn't turn pro.
Sixteen-year-old girl suddenly has the joints of an 80-year-old.
You think we can discuss this for a second? It's rhabdo.
Patient gave you the answer.
She fell down and went boom.
We have to leave in an hour, so should we eenie meenie? The fall would explain the lower leg damage, but not the swollen hands.
Hard landing caused crushed muscles, crushed muscles released toxins into the bloodstream, toxins caused swelling in the hands and legs.
Just another way of saying it's rhabdo.
Fifty-nine minutes.
She's a credit-card kid.
Parents are architects.
They're working on a project in Shanghai.
Could you be sitting any further away from Chase and still be in the same room? It doesn't have to be rhabdo.
The swelling could also be caused by deep vein thrombosis.
She has allergies, could be anaphylaxis, or some heart condition that we don't It can't really be any of those things since it's rhabdo.
I know it's rhabdo, Foreman knows it's rhabdo, deep in his heart, even Chase knows it's rhabdo.
Isn't it annoying when everybody in the room knows something you don't? I'll test for everything.
He's an ass.
Contrast is ready.
She already thinks I'm cheating on her.
Maybe this is House's way of telling you to talk to her.
Sure.
"How was your day, honey? By the way, I killed someone.
" If I tell her, that's dumping a burden on her forever.
Okay.
No sign of obstructions or clots.
Tell me what you came here for, House.
I've got a legitimate medical reason.
You must be so proud.
I've forgotten it.
I guess it's no big deal since I was only using it as an excuse to come check out Patty and Selma.
I feel bad.
I haven't named your testicles.
Word on the street is you set a new personal best for low-cut.
I don't know why you chose to give them the names of somebody's aunts.
It's a compliment.
They're always smoking.
I remember.
I need you to authorize the medical discharge of a minor.
That's why I'm holding this in my hand.
Haven't finished testing yet, but it's Your outbox is three times normal size.
That's not a metaphor.
There's a lot to be done before the weekend.
You could take papers home with you.
Unless you're not gonna be home.
Unless you were, for example, going to a medical conference.
I'm driving up with Wilson.
Me, too.
You aren't on the registration list.
I love that you checked.
But Wilson said That I have a case? Yeah.
You're authorizing the discharge right now.
That was a metaphor.
I'm busy right now.
Is he dying? Yeah.
In the next 10 minutes? Unfortunately, no.
He's in a lot of pain.
I thought about it.
You're right, I should go to the conference.
You found out Cuddy's going.
Oh, God, no.
She'll ruin everything.
We leave in two hours.
Please, morphine.
I'm right here.
I'm right here, Joseph.
Two days away.
You think I should pack Bally? You can't leave.
You lit a fuse, you need to watch the bomb go off.
The bomb was gonna go off on its own if you kept quiet.
So now you either have to come up with a convincing lie or tell her the truth.
Your choice.
CK levels point to rhabdo.
Of course.
Except for the part where imaging shows no sign of muscle crush.
Hi.
I'm your doctor, and this is Lars Ulrich, greatest metal drummer of all time.
You know the song? Good.
Drumstick.
Here's another drumstick.
I want you to rock out to the music, the way you did last night.
Come on.
This is a classic medical test.
Hippocrates used it.
Let's go.
Come on, you gotta keep time.
Crossover on the high-hat.
Let's head-bang.
House, what are you doing? Chart said her potassium's low.
Rhabdo elevates potassium.
And the monkey drums.
Ergo, her levels must have been really low last night.
Which causes I can't move them.
temporary muscle paralysis.
Given this rate of muscle fatigue, there's no way she could have climbed stairs and then a fence to the pool.
Low potassium means no jump, means no trauma.
Tests mean, yes, rhabdo.
Ergo, something else caused both the rhabdo and the low potassium.
This time, start by getting an accurate history.
Be careful, our patient's a big, fat liar.
What did you really do last night? We need to find the cause of your low potassium.
You could have a kidney disorder, leukemia, adenoma.
We need to know about any drugs or alcohol, anything that might have threatened your health.
Come on, Jord.
Okay, we didn't spend the night with the band.
You can't tell our friends.
Have you heard of Stiletto: Warrior Queen of Space? It's a comic book, right? Thank you, yes Yeah.
and a freaking amazing new sci-fi series, and they're filming the motion picture now.
It's a prequel.
The other girls wouldn't get it.
Only Phoebe understands my passion.
Only Phoebe understands "the bushido of the heel.
" So what actually happened last night? We were with our friends, trying to get into the Pharmacide tour party at the Adams.
And then I found out that Jeffrey Keener was gonna be there.
I follow his tweets.
It's tragic that I have to explain this.
He's the creator of Stiletto issue number one and the TV show.
He's a god.
So did you guys go up to him? God, no.
We keep a 10-foot rule.
It's not stalking if you don't go up to the person and bother them.
So we just followed him around.
Discreetly.
He ditched after half an hour and went down to the hotel restaurant for a late dinner.
And you went with him? Discreetly.
We played it so cool.
For two hours, we lived his life.
We did everything he did, ate the exact same meal he ate.
Cool.
The rest of their story checks out.
Hotel manager says Mom and Dad were charged for food and a room, three pay-per-view episodes of Stiletto You trying to kill yourself? It's from the same batch the girls ate.
They ate what he ate, and what 100 other healthy people ate.
Dig in, lunch is on the Adams.
What if food is the answer? Not this food, any food.
Jordan says she ate all of this.
She's 16, all about body image, and she obviously worries about fitting in.
Bulimia would account for her symptoms.
We should do a barium swallow for Mallory-Weiss tears, start her on nutritional supplements, get a psych consult.
Why are you reading my program guide? It's not like you plan on attending any of the presentations.
I like to know how much boredom I'm missing.
"Patient perceptions of complications in end-stage chemotherapy.
" You didn't tell me you were giving a paper.
And that was wrong? The last time you presented a paper, you gave me an advance copy and asked for feedback.
And you're wondering why I wouldn't want to repeat that experience? Oh, look, an '80s party.
Just when you think you've left Flock of Seagulls behind in your rear-view mirror, suddenly it's up ahead like an undead hitchhiker.
Cuddy's going.
Did you pack my legwarmers? If you want her, ask her out.
My God, man.
She's not some floozy in a bar, she's the floozy I work for.
There's gotta be no radical steps here, gotta be subtle.
We happen to attend the same party, the chat happens to turn personal.
Like the frog in gradually boiling water.
Exactly.
She'll be red and delicious before she knows it.
That's fun.
What could possibly go wrong? Chase went to the gym five times this week.
Okay.
One of those times, I followed him.
What? I followed him.
And, yes, I know how humiliating that admission is.
Where'd he go? The gym.
That time.
But I know that something's I'm stopping you right there.
This is a conversation you should be having with Chase, not me.
I've tried having this conversation with Chase.
No sign of tears.
It's not bulimia.
Is he having an affair? No.
Why should I believe you? You shouldn't.
You should believe him.
Baby, how are you? Sweetie.
Jordan.
Normal sinus rhythm.
Heart rate's fine.
BP's dropping.
- What's happening to her? No pulse.
Oh, my God.
You said her heart rate was fine.
Cardiac tamponade, drain the fluid now.
What is going on? She's bleeding around her heart.
Blood constricted her heart muscle.
She's on antiarrhythmics, but we don't know how long we can keep her stable.
Seemed to be triggered by stress.
Her parents had just Did her blood pressure drop during the barium swallow? Dropped to 50 systolic in three minutes.
Rules out chronic conditions.
Acute conditions limit us to toxins, infections Could be anything.
A gas leak, arsenic in the wallpaper, fungus in the shower I'll get samples from her room and the restaurant.
Talk to our little Gossip Girl.
You need to know exactly where she's been and what she's done in the last 24 hours.
Oh, I think Welcome to the convention, Dr.
Perlmutter.
It's my 25th consecutive year.
Perlmutter loves the '80s.
Do you need me to leave, too? You might remember stuff she doesn't.
We didn't do anything we haven't told you about.
We hung out at Jordan's all day, and then we called a limo to go into the city.
We stopped at Bruce Springsteen's house.
Jord, don't joke around, okay? You're really sick.
Just tell him the truth.
Bruce let me play the first electric guitar he ever owned.
My God, why are you lying? How can you not believe me? Turn to your right.
Mr.
Keener, I really appreciate you coming.
Oh, it's not that much of a hike.
My room's only six floors up.
Last night, do you remember two girls, about 16? That table right there.
They made an impression.
They were hard to miss, with the giggling and the staring.
I'm sure that happens to you a lot.
I'm sure that happens to you a lot more.
She can't control it.
A bleed in her brain is affecting her thalamus, causing her to lie.
We need to know everything.
You two were never apart? Except for when she went to go get ice.
But that couldn't have taken very long.
You don't know? It was in the middle of the night.
I woke up when she came back into the room.
And she told you she went to get ice? House.
Are you sure? They weren't specific.
How much did it cost you to rent that? It was in Wilson's bag.
Dr.
Perlmutter.
I read your article on neural degeneration.
You didn't really take that seriously, did you? I just wrote that for the money.
Well, hey, there, Jane Fonda, would you care to dancercise? Sorry, we were just about to hit the floor.
Thank you.
Your leg? I'm okay, as long as you don't expect rhythm.
You remember the last time we danced? Med school.
The week we met.
No.
I saw you in Endocrinology, tracked you down to the hoe-down.
I meant we met before that.
In the bookstore.
Ah.
My third day of school.
I hand my syllabus to the guy behind the counter.
He barely looks at me, just skims the sheet and tells me I'm overly ambitious, I have a chip on my shoulder and I know how to party.
I'd forgotten you knew how to party.
I said, "You're making that up.
" Then you said, "Your class schedule is overloaded, "but none of your classes are before 11:00, "and no one takes Professor Lamb's course unless they have something to prove.
" Because Professor Siegal covered the same ground and was the easier grader.
I tracked you down.
Endocrinology, the party.
And one thing led to another.
And then it didn't.
I was gonna call you.
No, don't do that.
There was no expectations.
I was just as into it I was gonna come see you.
Figure out where things would go from there.
That was the morning I got the call from the dean, and I was expelled from my first med school.
There didn't seem any point.
I should go to my room and review papers for the infectious disease panel.
Hello.
Yeah.
Thanks for telling me.
It's 7:00 in the morning.
Somebody better be dead.
My patient.
Joseph Schultz.
Oh.
Under the circumstances, it was the best thing that could have happened, right? Yeah.
I just wish I'd been there.
Didn't hear you come in last night.
Yes, it was almost 9:30.
Things didn't go as you planned? We've moved on to a new phase.
I tell Cuddy that I've always been interested in her, and she walks out of the room.
Well, either she just wasn't ready for that, or maybe she was just surprised and didn't know how to react.
What are you doing? Interesting reflex of guilt just now.
Your patient's been dying for six weeks, you couldn't have predicted that he'd go this weekend.
Or could you? "Euthanasia.
Let's tell the truth.
We all do it.
" It's a great opening line.
Are you insane? I didn't want your notes before, and I don't want them now.
Well, she didn't get ice.
She got out in the lobby.
She could've gone anywhere.
Let's start with for how long.
Fast forward.
Stop.
Rewind.
Back.
Wherever she went, she was only gone for like five minutes.
She's holding something.
That's Keener's journal.
He must have left it in the restaurant that night.
She went back, claimed it belonged to her.
She was looking for an excuse to knock on his door.
I know what you're gonna say.
I'm not insane.
Doctors are rarely indicted.
I was just thinking of your career.
But, yeah, if you're one of the doctors occasionally indicted, I guess it could affect that.
Someone needs to say what life is really like, now, for people who are dying.
What doctors have to go through.
The decisions we have to make.
Alone.
Without guidance.
Someone should say that, in an unsigned letter to the Times.
I'd be telling the truth.
I'd be saying what we're all thinking.
Who cares? The oncology department is subsidized by drug companies, they don't want it run by a murderer.
We're all murderers.
We just don't have the guts to admit And once again, who cares? You won't be hirable.
Anywhere.
If there's one thing I've learned from you, it's that I should do what I think is right, and not worry about the consequences.
Yeah, it's worked out great for me.
I don't mean to be rude, but I'm expecting a notes call from LA.
Can we make this quick? Did Jordan come to your room the other night? Let me put it another way.
We know Jordan came to your room the other night.
Look, I've tried to be helpful.
I don't know why you want to pretend I'm lying to you, but this is getting too weird for me.
We need to search your room.
You don't, because she was never here.
Allison, calm down.
You would cover your ass at the expense of someone's life? We know she brought up your journal.
That was helpful.
He'd be crazy to risk his marriage for a one-night stand.
With a teenager.
Sensible people only risk their marriage for something more serious? I'm not having an affair.
We're talking about Keener.
Fine.
He doesn't care about his marriage, what about his career? Statutory rape would ruin it.
It's admitting statutory rape that could ruin it.
Which is why we'll never hear the truth out of him.
Roofies OD explains all her symptoms.
We should start treating her with flumazenil.
Isn't the MRSA panel going on? We got kicked out.
She started crying.
Yeah, well, discussions of urinary catheterization will do that to me, too.
The babysitter had an emergency.
Oh, how did you like '80s Night? House talked with you? I was being subtle about it.
You left suddenly.
I know House can be a little much sometimes.
He was sweet.
I just know better than to rely on that.
He's trying.
Yeah.
I know.
I'm a mother now.
I need a guy I can count on every single day.
That's never been House.
It's not roofies.
She's bleeding behind her kidneys.
We're transfusing another two units packed red cells, but she keeps springing leaks.
It looks like a toxic reaction.
Keener must have given her something.
The guy's a comic book writer, not a drug dealer.
There's a lot that wouldn't show up on a standard tox screen.
But he's never gonna tell us the truth.
We're not going to get the truth out of her either.
We will if we drug her.
Amobarbital would suppress her thalamus.
She's on antiarrhythmics.
Amobarbital could stop her heart.
She's already dying.
You're angry at me.
You're taking it out on this guy 'cause you think he's lying to you, too, and you're going to kill our patient in the process.
We need to know the truth.
We should call House.
Yeah, he'll recommend we take the cautious approach.
Pretzel? Those are gonna show up on my credit card at seven bucks a bag.
There's an all-you-can- eat buffet downstairs.
Studies show that $10 wine tastes better if you're told that it costs $90.
I'm sure the same thing must be true of grape soda.
Have one.
We can toast your impending unemployment.
Yes, you can sit here running up my hotel bill, or you can go get the woman of your dreams.
I didn't know Angela Merkel was attending the conference.
I just spoke with Cuddy.
She doesn't think you're reliable.
And you will remain friend-zoned until that changes.
I can't convince her that I've changed my entire personality in a weekend.
Yeah, but you could make the first step.
What does she need? Today, a babysitter.
What are you thinking about? Fjords.
You see? Seriously, I know this is out of your comfort zone, but don't scheme, don't Just do the deed You tell me that I gotta show her I've changed, and yet you act like you don't believe I can.
If I can't convince my best friend I'm sorry, and that's I didn't mean I didn't mean I didn't mean You drugged me.
She's better off without you.
Words can hurt, you know.
I thought truth serum was only stuff they gave people in lame spy movies.
We know you're scared, and we know you want to tell the truth.
We're going to help you do that.
What happened between you and Keener the night you went up to his room? I couldn't believe he even talked to me.
I told him how much his work means to me.
I figured I must sound like a moron, but he was nice about it.
He said I was special.
Heart rate's increasing.
Let her talk.
Did he give you anything, a drink, pills? He said it was Ecstasy.
But it didn't look like Ecstasy.
And it didn't really make me feel how Ecstasy usually does.
How did it make you feel? It just made me really tired.
What did it look like? A capsule? Tablet? It was a tablet.
Round.
Could be lithium.
He just started touching me.
At first, it seemed nice, but then I didn't want to insult him.
That's enough.
I'm so sorry.
I love you guys so much and I just I feel like I've let you down.
I'm gonna kill him.
I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch.
Before you do that, look here.
Increased periorbital blood flow throughout.
It means everything she's been saying has been a lie.
Everything? So you still don't know what's wrong with her? Sorry.
I thought you were room service.
Is something going on with your patient? It's quiet in there.
Is Rachel asleep? I thought maybe you could use a babysitter.
Actually, I've got her in daycare downstairs.
Oh.
Great.
Maybe later.
Hey, House.
Hey, Lucas.
This is awkward.
A bit.
That awkwardness would probably go away if I left.
Hello? It's Foreman.
I'm trying to update House, but his phone's off.
House! He's not here.
Patient's losing blood faster than we can transfuse.
Cameron did an online search, found out Keener travels with his dog.
We're treating for Rickettsia.
Any idea where he is? Oh, no! I was supposed to be giving a paper five minutes ago.
Okay.
Okay.
Dr.
Wilson has asked me to tender his apologies for his absence.
You'll be hearing my paper instead.
Unfortunately, there wasn't time to correct the program schedule.
Euthanasia.
Let's tell the truth.
We all do it.
We just don't talk about it.
We play the game.
We use other words, or we don't use any words at all.
Hmm.
Nice phrasing.
Hello.
I don't know what department I want.
I need pants.
Patient S, 55-year-old man end-stage lung cancer.
His pain was beyond the point where we could even pretend to treat it.
I showed him how to use the morphine pump.
I told him too much morphine would kill him, but not to worry, the machine only gives out so much.
To override it, you need to enter a special code.
I went to the door and told the nurse, "The code is 328.
" I said it loudly.
When he first came to my office, I'd told him I would be with him every step of the way.
But I left him alone at the end.
I broke that promise.
To cover my ass, I failed I was wrong when I wrote that.
I've never given any less than my best.
I'm incapable of turning away from a responsibility.
My friends take advantage of that fact far too often.
I know that I gave that man everything I could.
And I know that he knew that, too.
This is a burden no one should have to carry alone.
And this is a decision no one should make alone.
Because, frankly, I don't trust all of you.
Doctor! Doctor! Doctor! Question! Excuse me, Doctor.
Not many people would have your courage.
Thank you, Dr.
Perlmutter.
Hey! Before I start shouting, Foreman says they're looking at Rickettsia.
Thanks for the message.
Continue.
What the hell? You think that little shout out is gonna make me forget that you drugged me, hid my pants, stole my speech? You wanted the paper out there.
It's out there.
And your job is safe.
That was my paper.
You don't ask what I want, you ignore my wishes, you drug me I'm waiting for you to name something new to our relationship.
You got no good reason to be angry with me.
Oh, really? I should be thanking you? If this was about getting the story out there, then, yeah.
Of course, if this is actually about something else, maybe you feeling impotent because patients keep dying, and you think you need to make some grand, stupid gesture, need to be a hero, well, then, yeah, sorry, I did screw it up.
You stepped over the line.
This was not your decision.
My God, there are in this country, every one of them loses patients, but only you would feel guilty enough Of course.
We can't even argue on my schedule.
It's House.
Take down the bags.
It's too soon to tell if the meds are gonna It's not the meds.
It's the blood that's killing her.
What's everybody doing? You're stunned, right? I mean, blood? She's had internal bleeding, she needs the blood to Is that the mom? I got a good comeback if it's the mom.
Yes, I'm her mother.
Sure, she needs blood, if you want to kill her.
Then you'd have nobody left to neglect.
Great plan.
Your daughter has Vibrio vulnificus, courtesy of a few scrumptious oysters on the half shell.
I didn't eat any oysters.
Thus proving that she did.
Boy, that's neat.
A hundred other people ate those oysters.
I ate Is that the dad? I got a good comeback if It's Chase.
Oh.
Thought the dad might have been Australian, too.
There was nothing wrong with the oysters.
All oysters have Vibrio.
But almost no one has hemochromatosis.
It'd give her a unique susceptibility to Vibrio, cause the swollen joints.
It got attributed to bulimia, so she got supplements.
With iron.
Which overcooked the liver, which caused bleeding.
More blood, more iron, more bleeding, more blood.
Is she going to be okay? Only if we give her high-dose ceftazidime for the Vibrio and chelate for the hemochromatosis.
Now, Cameron, pick up the phone and give me a dramatic exit.
So, how did you two crazy kids hook up? I suspected someone in accounting was skimming money, and I wanted to investigate quietly.
And since you introduced me to the only detective I know One thing leads to another.
Why keep it a secret? Were you protecting me in my fragile state? You think I was an unhinged loony who was about to go off the rails at a badly-timed bit of news? I just don't advertise my personal life.
I needed help with the baby, Lucas drove up.
Yeah, she was worried.
A little worried.
As a friend.
I had to hide in our room and be the dirty little secret.
Kind of sucked.
I told her it wasn't necessary.
So you had some hallucination about having sex with her.
I don't think we need to talk I mean, I imagine having sex with women all the time.
No big deal.
Though I guess if they knew what I imagined, it could get awkward.
And I guess it's different because in the fantasy, she was your savior.
But I mean, that was months ago, right? All the work that you had to do to get straight.
You've been institutionalized, you've had way bigger stuff to deal with.
I should shut up.
Can I buy you a ginger ale? Ginger ale would be good.
With lemon.
Infection's clearing up nicely.
You should be out of here in a few days.
That is wonderful.
Jack, how are you? Sweetie, your father and I think we should reward ourselves with a little time off.
That meeting's gonna have to wait a couple of weeks.
We're staying here.
You should think about where you'd like to go.
Honey, they're saying the specs are off for the whole foundation.
Can you at least come talk to him? Let me see.
You okay? Yeah.
No.
Soil engineering report was fine.
I'm used to it.
So, about what happened that night I never even got up the courage to knock on his door.
Well, you'll have to send me their numbers.
Yay! You want to go driving? He looks like a guy who'd be there every day.
Mini-bar's re-stocked.
I say we grab some pretzels for the road When you do what I did, it's not enough to tell yourself you did nothing wrong.
You need to hear it from someone else.
If not God or society, a friend, otherwise you go crazy.
What you said to me up there Thank you.
You're a good friend.
Cuddy should know that.
Yeah, you should let her know that I drugged you so you wouldn't confess to murder.
Let's get out of here.
Someone could have recognized you.
First US conference I've attended in 15 years.
Perlmutter? Toronto, all weekend, airtight alibi.
I'm sorry.
I don't know why I always suspect the worst.
If you say you're not having an affair, you're not having an affair.
Oh, God.
You are? I'm not.
Okay.
Sorry.
Again.
If you don't wanna tell, okay.
But I could help.
Whatever this is, it's eating away at you.
We could get past it together.
I love you no matter what.
We lose patients sometimes.
One of those patients, Dibala, we didn't actually lose him.
I killed him.